How can you answer the question: “How are you?”

There used to be a saying that a bore is a person who, in response to the question: “How are you doing,” actually tells how he is doing, and in very detail. Therefore, many tried to answer this question monosyllabically and uninterestingly, without fear of being branded as a person without a creative streak. Saying “Excellent” or “Good” every time is too commonplace. You definitely won’t get into the cohort of witty people with this approach. After all, even such a simple question “how are you?” can be answered with creativity. And here's how.

Regular answers

The most common options are neutral, as laconic as possible. You should not indulge in long discussions on the topic, unless, of course, you want to be considered a bore. If the interlocutor asks a question not out of banal politeness, he himself will clarify the points that interest him.

If all is good

When you're in a great mood, be sure to share positive emotions. Remember the song about why it is important to share a smile with the world and others?

“It’s either just cool or very cool.”
“All in a bundle!”
“Cool, maybe there will be more!”
"All OK".
“There is not a single reason to complain.”
“If I share the details, you’ll be jealous, so I’ll answer briefly: everything is super.”
“I feel like a cat: I’m constantly purring with pleasure.”
"Great".
"The best!".
“Great plans! Enslave the world, for example.”

If everything is truly wonderful, it doesn’t matter what words you use to convey it. Intonation will more clearly indicate a favorable state of mind than words, and you will definitely charge your interlocutor with a good mood.

If things go wrong

Of course, you can answer sharply negatively so that they definitely stop asking further questions, however, it is better to stay within the bounds of politeness. You can report a negative mood like this:

“It’s like after a well-spent New Year’s Eve.”
“I think you know the answer? We both live in Russia.”
“I live in an atmosphere that flies would appreciate.”
“Shit.”
“Like driving a six in a car race.”
“It’s like I’m sitting on an unsuccessful fishing trip: it seems to bite often, but only a trifle.”
“It’s like traveling on a ship, only with seasickness.”
“Breathtaking! You know what happens in creepy thrillers? I feel like the main character.”
“Glad to be alive.”
“Like a button: every day I climb into a noose.”

A bad mood is not a reason to press your interlocutor for pity. An overly pessimistic attitude may discourage him from talking to you in the future. Learn to present information about any life circumstances without spreading a negative mood to those who are polite.

What to ask instead of “how are you?”

How are you doing?
What's up?
Like at home?
How are things going, really?
What are you doing?
How was your day?
What happened at work (school)?
What did you do today?
What are your plans for the future?
How are you (yourself)?

All these questions also fall into the category of banal ones. They can be asked to any person, even a stranger. But if you want to show concern for someone, then you need to ask the person exactly what he is living with now. If you are studying, then ask a question regarding school, college, or institute. If you communicate with a young parent, then you need to ask how the child is. Conversations about babies can be truly endless. The only thing that can compete with this topic is a conversation about pets, because they are like children to us.

Passionate people have their own inexhaustible topics: theater, photography, literature, fine arts, dancing, electronics, cars, fishing, football... The main thing is to know what a person is passionate about, and to be at least a little in the subject. And then everything will work out!

Funny options

Jokes are most appropriate in a friendly dialogue, but with people you barely know or with your boss it is better to be more serious. It is unknown how humor like this will be received:

“It’s like I’m forced to go on a business trip by plane: I feel terrible, but I have to fly.”
“Like an autumn leaf: I don’t know which wind will blow it away in the next moment and where.”
“All cases have been transferred to the prosecutor.”
“Like in the fairy tales of the Brothers Grimm: the further you read them, the scarier they become.”
“It’s a bit difficult without sedatives.”
“Average for the area.”
“No business today!”

Rhyming answers can sound funny, even if they are about sad things. For example:

“My heart has been incinerated, and my flesh has already been burned to ashes, but still my saddest affairs are going on magnificently.”
“Everything is fine, I’m sleeping on the lampshade.”
"How's it going? Not a bump on my head!”

The best questions for guys or how to embarrass him

Make your interlocutor laugh if you are already tired of ordinary questions, and perhaps the conversation will take an interesting direction.

A list of smart answers to the question “What are you doing?”, “What are you doing?”

A “smart” answer is those thoughts that you express, choosing words correctly and competently, using beautiful phrases and quotes, literary vocabulary. Your answers should not only give the interlocutor specific information, but also show your education.

Options:

Tell me about your multifaceted interests: “I do everything I can: study, work, have fun.” If you have something planned, mention it: “I’m going to go on a trip and therefore I’m working very hard.”
Don’t forget about: “I’m looking for food for my brain, I want to read something .
If you want to make a joke, try answering: “I’m counting the calories I’ve eaten.”
If you want to “prick your interlocutor,” say: “I don’t waste time on empty questions and answers .
You can show your organization with these words: “I’m writing a to-do list and an action plan for tomorrow.”
If you don't want to continue the conversation and you intend not to continue this conversation, answer: “I'm solving a complex logarithmic equation and you're really bothering me.”
Life answer: “I’m resting after hard work and a difficult day at work .

Witty answers to questions

Original answers

If the question seems inappropriate, or you don't trust the person instigating the dialogue enough, you're unlikely to be willing to sincerely share personal details. Original options will come to the rescue:

“Business is going great, but its direction is unknown.”
“Okay, just random.”
“It’s like being in a taxi: the more comfortably I travel, the more I’ll pay.”
“I feel like a zebra.”
“Those who are doing something have things to do, but I’m resting.”
“I’m sad that children in Africa are starving.”
"Everything is relative. Compared to the affairs of a multimillionaire, not very much.”
“If I say it’s great, you won’t believe it; if I say it sucks, you won’t help.”
“I think it is not necessary to answer if there is nothing to answer.”
“Next question please!”

If you avoid a direct answer, but do it in an original way, you disarm your interlocutor and win him over.

A list of witty answers to the question “What are you doing?”, “What are you doing?”

This is a special kind of answer, a little humorous and a little rude, which can look like sarcasm or mockery.

Possible answers:

Slightly angry and rude answers: “I’m looking for an interesting interlocutor , “I dream of relaxing, and not answering questions.”
Sarcasm: “I’m doing a very important and responsible job: I’m making soap.”
The answer can be completely meaningless: “they are counting the amount of mayonnaise in their sandwich”, “I am filling my tummy tightly .

Witty options

Even when there is a bad streak in life, it is not necessary to let your interlocutor know about it and ruin his mood. Keep the conversation going with sparkling phrases.

“Chocolate! Sticky and brown.”
“Like wet sugar. I don’t get enough sleep at all.”
“It’s normal until the valerian runs out.”
“As always, so-so, but it’s wonderful: I love stability so much.”
“How can things get done if it’s such a snowstorm/heat outside?”
“I just received my salary, my mood exactly matches its size.”
“Young life passes by and leaves the old.”
“As long as I live, I don’t plan to die.”
“Haven’t killed anyone yet.”
“Oh, so much has not been done, and so much remains to be done...”

You yourself will feel better if you present unfavorable life circumstances with humor. Well, if everything is good, even more so, you can joke fun.

We answer the man

A man asks a girl how she is doing

In the case of a man, everything turns out to be a little more serious than with a guy. Answering a man with a joke is not always the right thing to do. Adult men are more accepting of witty responses.

For example, if a man asks: “ How are you?”

”, and you are particularly not satisfied with being addressed as “you” and there is a desire to switch to “you”, then you can answer:
“What are you like?”
“I’m here alone . And thanks to such a response, the situation can improve.

And the answer is “ I haven’t given birth yet!”

” to a man’s question can also be used if at the time of his question you are in a position (and such an answer may seem truthfully funny).

If the mood at the time of the question leaves much to be desired, instead of “How are you?” you can answer mysteriously “Dust and ash.” And the further reaction will show whether the man is ready to continue communicating with you, even if you are in a bad and depressed mood.

And yet, answering a man’s question funny is also not completely taboo. “ I can’t write - my hands are full of money

” - this could be the answer if asked by an adult man on the Internet. A humorous answer can give a man information about your financial situation (if you answer about it seriously).

How to behave with tactless and arrogant people?

Unexpected answers

If you want to arouse the interest of your interlocutor, avoid standard options. The more original the answer, the more likely it is that you will intrigue the person, and he will want to ask what exactly you meant.

“Like an elephant: constantly with ears on the cheeks.”
“Who knows, doesn’t ask. And whoever asks doesn’t know.”
“Semper in motu.”
“There’s no business at all, I’m not a business person.”
"Just like others".
“Everything is great, just yesterday I received a Nobel Prize for my contribution to the development of science.”
“Great, I look forward to further questions about my personal life.”
“Like 5 minutes ago.”
“Tell me about everything at once or in parts?”
“Everything is piling up, and I can’t finish it”

The listed answers can turn the conversation in a completely unexpected direction, since if the interlocutor is interested in you, new questions will definitely follow.

How to replace “Hi, how are you?”

You know the phone number of the girl you like, her page on a social network, all you have to do is take the decisive step - start communicating.

Perhaps you have been following her profile for a long time and know how bright and extraordinary she is, or maybe you met in real life, and you are aware that you are far from the only one who wants not to date.

Suppose you write to her:

"Hello!"

Short and sweet, right?

Hmmm. Let's say.

But what next?

Should I write something else or just wait for her to respond?

To your great happiness, after a few minutes she answers:

"Hello!"

Damn, so what now?

Your gears in your head were grinding, but they didn’t produce any original thoughts.

And you send her the usual: “How are you?”

Your palms are sweaty from excitement, your heart is beating wildly, will he answer or not?

She still answered:

"Fine! How are yours?”

Your face breaks into a happy smile. But then it comes to you...

What's next?

You have no ideas!

And so you are reading this article in hopes of improving your communication skills.

Before I talk about the good, I'll start with the bad.

That is: what not to write to the girl you like.

Snarky options

Etiquette is etiquette, but sometimes you just want to tease your interlocutor if you have the feeling that he is not sincerely interested in matters. And then you can answer like this:

“I really didn’t want to upset you, but, alas, everything is fine!”
“Poor, miserable me... I’m already tired of figuring out how to answer banal questions every day.”
“Everything was fine until I met you.”
“Better than some.”
“I am simply ecstatic from your questions. Ask me how I spent my day, and I will be simply captivated.”
“You are incomparably original in your questions.”
“I don’t think you’re interested.”
“I haven’t lost enough weight yet to have a dialogue with you.”
“Just like you asked, it immediately felt great, I missed it so much!”
“Lately I’ve been training my pet to answer such questions.”

You can get to know a guy better by asking questions!

All of these answer options will make it clear to the interlocutor that you have no intention of continuing the dialogue.

When a guy asks what are you doing tomorrow, what are you doing - what should you answer?

If a young man asks a girl about her employment and type of activity, he is definitely interested in her as a person and is not even averse to flirting.

You can answer like this:

Thank you for the question, this will show you on the good side, as a polite girl: “Thank you for asking, I’m just thinking about what to do .
Flirt: “I’m thinking about how to spend this evening, do you have any suggestions?”
Hint about your freedom: “I’m looking for a life partner,” “I’m looking for a guy,” “I’m looking for someone to meet .

Answers according to circumstances

In order not to put yourself in an awkward position, it is important to understand that different responses are appropriate in a dialogue with different people.

At work

It’s common to joke with colleagues that things aren’t going well.

“Like a future millionaire: there is a desire to become one, but there is no money yet.”
“No better than a squirrel in a wheel.”
“Like a native, I walk around naked and eat figs.”
“Like potatoes: either they will be eaten within a year, or they will be planted.”
“Like a ball: they cheated and even kicked.”
"How are you? A lot of them. Do you want me to share?”
“It’s like being in the harem of a Turkish sultan. I know that they will definitely fuck, but it’s not clear when.”

In a dialogue with your boss, it is better to be serious, answer concisely, specifically and carefully integrate information about a specific achievement. For example:

“I’ve just started working on the project, and the results are already exceeding my wildest expectations.”
“I read a new book and am now implementing the knowledge I gained in life.”
“I learned a new skill and now I feel head and shoulders above.”

Take advantage of every opportunity to highlight your strengths: your boss will definitely make a positive mental note about you.

In conversation with parents

When you communicate with loved ones, it is better to refrain from barbs. Parents can take bad jokes to heart.

"Affairs? Let’s leave them to the businessmen, and let’s go have fun.”
“No changes, consistently good.”
“It’s great, because I communicate with wonderful people.”
“Wonderful, and I wish the same for you.”
“Today is even better than yesterday.”
“Everything is fine: growing, blooming.”
“Things are going well, life is in full swing.”
“Stable.”
“Through your prayers.”
“It’s good to be around you.”

Parents are absolutely sincerely interested in matters, so it is not necessary to limit yourself to a short answer. Share the details of your personal life and be sure to ask your loved ones answer questions.

In a conversation with a stranger

If you are interested in a person who is trying to get to know you, you should not answer briefly. On the other hand, talking at length can make you seem like a bore. Therefore, you can answer a question with a question in order to understand how detailed a conversation the stranger is still inclined to have. For example:

“Are you in no hurry?”
"And what do you think?".

You can also demonstrate mutual interest with phrases containing a response question: “How are you doing?” If the stranger doesn’t appeal to you at all, increase the distance:

“Sluggish.”
“A question like that is a sure way to stump me.”
“I find it difficult to answer.”
"It depends on what you compare it to".
“When they don’t ask stupid questions, it’s actually pretty good.”
“I don’t think you’re really interested in this.”
“I’m going crazy with useless questions.”
“I’m thinking about how to get rid of an annoying interlocutor.”

Try to respond less often with rudeness; even strangers should be shown respect. After all, how you treat others is how they will treat you.

Answers to the guy you like

If you are a girl and not a modest one, you can take the bull by the horns:

“It’s like being on the Internet: click, like, and go to bed.”
“Like on Mars: there doesn’t seem to be any life, but I’m all on fire.”
“Great, I’m improving. Will you keep company?”
"Super. I guess everyone is jealous of me, because I get to chat with such a handsome guy.”
“I'm searching.”
“I’m in the mood to share my phone number.”
“It’s like I came to a buffet table: I’m standing there, embarrassed to ask for what I want.”

A narcissist man and relationships with him: understand, fall in love and endure

Still, in the first conversation it is better not to cross a certain line of decency. Try to stand out from other girls with a non-trivial answer, but it’s better if it’s not vulgar. Create some intrigue:

“I’m in a great mood, I’d like to go for a walk, but so far I haven’t received any offers from anyone...”
“Guess what, I’m giving you the opportunity to ask leading questions.”
“Wonderful, but it’s not very comfortable to have a conversation in the rain, I would like to go to a more comfortable place.”

The listed options are a sure way to win over a handsome guy you barely know.

Options for your ex

That's where there is room for your imagination! It all depends on how you broke up and what impression you want to create about yourself now. So the answer options can be completely different, from flirty hints about spending time together to distant phrases and even a little harsh:

“Try to guess three times! If it works, I’ll have a cup of coffee.”
“There is a bottle of a wonderful five-star, if only you were nearby - and everything would be fine.”
“Like a chocolate bar in the sun, I melt sweetly...”
“Wonderful, because I’m talking to you.”
"Guess! I’ll give you a hint: I sincerely smile during our dialogue.”
“Everything is stable, unchanged. It looks like there’s even a circle of interlocutors.”
“I’m doing some soul-searching.”
“What do you think? If you become a nuisance to a great time.”
“I don’t think you have any reason to be interested in this?”
Banal: “I haven’t given birth yet.”

There is no universal option for your ex; decide for yourself which one is right for you.

"How are you?" — What to say to a guy you like

From this simple question you can inflate an invitation to some action or conversation

Today I have a payday at work, and my mood matches the size of my salary.
I have a bottle of good, Armenian, five-star mood, if only you were around - and everything would be gorgeous.
I want to lift my nose up, but he looks down with a hook...

The first example is intriguing because I want to ask further: “What is your salary?” After this, you can start a long, unobtrusive conversation.

The second example is an open invitation to spend the evening together.

The third answer will indicate that you cannot cheer yourself up, but still try to joke. This is a veiled invitation to action. The guy will have to either entertain you over the phone or offer to go somewhere together.

Laugh it off

Unless you're a sparkling stand-up comedian, it's best to prepare in advance. The irritating questions are usually the same, so you can come up with a witty answer to each and deliver it every time someone steps onto the slippery ground of tactlessness.

- Why don’t you have children?

- You know, I ask myself all the time, why don’t I have children. But in the end I can’t come to an agreement with myself, I quarrel and even stop talking to myself. Apparently, we will have to wait a little longer, otherwise we will have to part with ourselves on this basis.

Transform the question

An uncomfortable topic can be directed in the right direction if you clarify the subject of the conversation before you start answering. It is important to navigate quickly so that the interlocutor does not have time to bring you back.

- Do you have a groom, or will you die surrounded by cats?

- Do you mean that cats scare away suitors? What are you saying, my cats are very friendly, because I took them from a shelter. By the way, I advise you too, a cat is always useful on the farm. Moreover, the cats from the shelter are so grateful.