How to answer the question "How are you?" in different life situations

Incredible facts

Hi, how are you? The easiest way to answer this question would be “Everything is fine.”

However, this answer sounds rather boring and predictable.

In fact, this question can be a great way to start an interesting conversation .

If you are tired of ordinary, no different phrases, this list will be a real salvation for you.

Choose one of the answers,

which will be a breath of fresh air in your daily communication.

Who knows where this conversation will take you.

Regular answers

The most common options are neutral, as laconic as possible. You should not indulge in long discussions on the topic, unless, of course, you want to be considered a bore. If the interlocutor asks a question not out of banal politeness, he himself will clarify the points that interest him.

If all is good

When you're in a great mood, be sure to share positive emotions. Remember the song about why it is important to share a smile with the world and others?

“It’s either just cool or very cool.”
“All in a bundle!”
“Cool, maybe there will be more!”
"All OK".
“There is not a single reason to complain.”
“If I share the details, you’ll be jealous, so I’ll answer briefly: everything is super.”
“I feel like a cat: I’m constantly purring with pleasure.”
"Great".
"The best!".
“Great plans! Enslave the world, for example.”

If everything is truly wonderful, it doesn’t matter what words you use to convey it. Intonation will more clearly indicate a favorable state of mind than words, and you will definitely charge your interlocutor with a good mood.

If things go wrong

Of course, you can answer sharply negatively so that they definitely stop asking further questions, however, it is better to stay within the bounds of politeness. You can report a negative mood like this:

“It’s like after a well-spent New Year’s Eve.”
“I think you know the answer? We both live in Russia.”
“I live in an atmosphere that flies would appreciate.”
“Shit.”
“Like driving a six in a car race.”
“It’s like I’m sitting on an unsuccessful fishing trip: it seems to bite often, but only a trifle.”
“It’s like traveling on a ship, only with seasickness.”
“Breathtaking! You know what happens in creepy thrillers? I feel like the main character.”
“Glad to be alive.”
“Like a button: every day I climb into a noose.”

A bad mood is not a reason to press your interlocutor for pity. An overly pessimistic attitude may discourage him from talking to you in the future. Learn to present information about any life circumstances without spreading a negative mood to those who are polite.

986 questions to ask a guy over text or when meeting

How to answer your ex-boyfriend’s question “how are you?” in order to hurt him

Such questions from “ex” are not always sincere. Often a guy may want to tease you. And what’s most interesting is that this is done because the “ex” himself feels awkward when meeting you, but wants to show that he is on horseback.

Therefore, you need to answer in such a way as to upset him:

I was in a wonderful mood until I met you, my dear.
Great. What did you think that without you the Earth would stop rotating?
I’m creaking slowly, and quite annoyingly!
I won’t tell you, otherwise you’ll be jealous!
Great, unlike some.
Sorry, I had an autism attack when I saw you.

Funny options

Jokes are most appropriate in a friendly dialogue, but with people you barely know or with your boss it is better to be more serious. It is unknown how humor like this will be received:

“It’s like I’m forced to go on a business trip by plane: I feel terrible, but I have to fly.”
“Like an autumn leaf: I don’t know which wind will blow it away in the next moment and where.”
“All cases have been transferred to the prosecutor.”
“Like in the fairy tales of the Brothers Grimm: the further you read them, the scarier they become.”
“It’s a bit difficult without sedatives.”
“Average for the area.”
“No business today!”

Rhyming answers can sound funny, even if they are about sad things. For example:

“My heart has been incinerated, and my flesh has already been burned to ashes, but still my saddest affairs are going on magnificently.”
“Everything is fine, I’m sleeping on the lampshade.”
"How's it going? Not a bump on my head!”

Make your interlocutor laugh if you are already tired of ordinary questions, and perhaps the conversation will take an interesting direction.

It's easier to be offended than to be honest about what annoys you.

Russian women have a habit of “swallowing an insult.” Why is this dangerous? If you remained silent and did not tell about your offense right away, then the pain settles in your body. It gradually accumulates and turns into a disease. The disease is given to you FOR PAIN, that’s why it’s called that.

For example, a sore throat is an obvious lump of resentment in the throat. A cold, runny nose, fever, and all similar symptoms are a signal that, most likely, personal boundaries have been violated. That is, your body tells you: “My dear, you can’t live like this anymore! Here's your temperature. Just lie down and think.”

And it happens the other way around. Women pour out all their accumulated grievances, but not on the offenders, but on innocent people. For example, at work your boss made you angry, and you didn’t tell him about it. The anger remains. And then you come home and lash out at your family and friends. For what? It’s better to honestly tell the offender that you can’t be treated like that.

Understand that people cannot read minds. They didn’t study to become psychics, they don’t read your field and have no idea what your personal boundaries are. Everyone was raised in different families. Everyone has their own habits and their own limits of what is permitted. And until you clearly tell us how you can and cannot work with you, no one will guess. You and only you can tell about your personal boundaries!

Original answers

If the question seems inappropriate, or you don't trust the person instigating the dialogue enough, you're unlikely to be willing to sincerely share personal details. Original options will come to the rescue:

“Business is going great, but its direction is unknown.”
“Okay, just random.”
“It’s like being in a taxi: the more comfortably I travel, the more I’ll pay.”
“I feel like a zebra.”
“Those who are doing something have things to do, but I’m resting.”
“I’m sad that children in Africa are starving.”
"Everything is relative. Compared to the affairs of a multimillionaire, not very much.”
“I’ll say that it’s cool - you won’t believe it; I’ll say it sucks - you can’t help.”
“I think it is not necessary to answer if there is nothing to answer.”
“Next question please!”

If you avoid a direct answer, but do it in an original way, you disarm your interlocutor and win him over.

How to react?

Counterstrike

The best defense is attack. Pretend that you are also concerned about the fate of your neighbor. How many rides in the elevator have you experienced together? Attack your interlocutor with his own weapon. Everyone has weaknesses. “When will there be children?” Answer: “It’s good that you asked! How is Vanechka doing at school?” "How much money do you make?" Answer: “Speaking of finances, how is your credit? Is your husband helping?

On the positive

There are people who are infuriated by the successes of others, but other people’s failures, on the contrary, give them strength. Let's leave the envious with nothing. Pretend that you don't care about their barbs. “Why are you so thin?” Answer: “Really? It's so nice to hear that!" “You still haven’t gotten a job?” Answer: “No! I continue to have a great time!”

"I didn't understand"

Reframe your interlocutor's question. The point is to make him feel stupid. The poor guy won't calm down? Make it clear that you do not intend to discuss this topic. And stay calm. “When is the second one?” Answer: “It seemed to me, or would you like to participate?”

Wrong address

Move the arrows. Why should you report and predict the future? Direct the curious to more knowledgeable people or higher powers. May Google help everyone! “When will you get married again?” Answer: “I don’t have such information.” “How much do your shoes cost?” Answer: “I have no idea, it’s a gift.”

A smile will make everyone brighter

Just kidding! An effective, but also the most difficult method, as it requires a sense of humor. But by skillfully combining indifference with wit, you will kill two birds with one stone and one talker. “When will you get married?” Answer: “We were just getting ready today, but overslept. We’ll definitely set an alarm for tomorrow!” "Why do not you have a boyfriend?" Answer: “He was, he died of happiness.”

Witty options

Even when there is a bad streak in life, it is not necessary to let your interlocutor know about it and ruin his mood. Keep the conversation going with sparkling phrases.

“Chocolate! Sticky and brown.”
“Like wet sugar. I don’t get enough sleep at all.”
“It’s normal until the valerian runs out.”
“As always, so-so, but it’s wonderful: I love stability so much.”
“How can things get done if it’s such a snowstorm/heat outside?”
“I just received my salary, my mood exactly matches its size.”
“Young life passes by and leaves the old.”
“As long as I live, I don’t plan to die.”
“Haven’t killed anyone yet.”
“Oh, so much has not been done, and so much remains to be done...”

You can get to know a guy better by asking questions!

You yourself will feel better if you present unfavorable life circumstances with humor. Well, if everything is good, even more so, you can joke fun.

They just asked

If you were asked this question just like that, on the go, then you should not tell the person about the situation in your home, regardless of whether it is positive or not. You can smile back and also say the usual phrase: “everything is fine” or “the best.”

Another thing is your best friend, whom you haven’t seen for a long time. She may also be interested in the state of your love affairs, the beginning of which she witnessed. You can briefly tell her about the main thing, like, “I’m getting married, you’re invited too,” “I broke up with him a long time ago, we’re not a couple,” and things like that.

Unexpected answers

If you want to arouse the interest of your interlocutor, avoid standard options. The more original the answer, the more likely it is that you will intrigue the person, and he will want to ask what exactly you meant.

“Like an elephant: constantly with ears on the cheeks.”
“Who knows, doesn’t ask. And whoever asks doesn’t know.”
“Semper in motu.”
“There’s no business at all, I’m not a business person.”
"Just like others".
“Everything is great, just yesterday I received a Nobel Prize for my contribution to the development of science.”
“Great, I look forward to further questions about my personal life.”
“Like 5 minutes ago.”
“Tell me about everything at once or in parts?”
“Everything is piling up, and I can’t finish it”

The listed answers can turn the conversation in a completely unexpected direction, since if the interlocutor is interested in you, new questions will definitely follow.

Technique for asserting personal boundaries No. 1 - “retelling the manipulator’s request”

It begins with the phrase: “So, you want to tell me that...”

How it sounded in my case: “That is, you want to tell me that you did not manage to fulfill your work duties on time. And now you’re asking me to work for you for free for 2 hours and make a report while you go home and rest? Do I understand you correctly?

This technique does a good job of dotting the i’s. When you honestly say that you see exactly how you are being manipulated, at that moment the manipulator begins to make excuses and tries to leave as quickly as possible.

In any relationship there is a balance of give and take. And if you feel that you are giving more than you receive, your personal boundaries have definitely been violated.

It is important to ensure that you are surrounded only by positive people with whom you are in balance. But we'll talk about this a little later. Now let's move on to practice.

I want to share with you a few more tools that will help you assert your personal boundaries.

Snarky options

Etiquette is etiquette, but sometimes you just want to tease your interlocutor if you have the feeling that he is not sincerely interested in matters. And then you can answer like this:

“I really didn’t want to upset you, but, alas, everything is fine!”
“Poor, miserable me... I’m already tired of figuring out how to answer banal questions every day.”
“Everything was fine until I met you.”
“Better than some.”
“I am simply ecstatic from your questions. Ask me how I spent my day, and I will be simply captivated.”
“You are incomparably original in your questions.”
“I don’t think you’re interested.”
“I haven’t lost enough weight yet to have a dialogue with you.”
“Just like you asked, it immediately felt great, I missed it so much!”
“Lately I’ve been training my pet to answer such questions.”

Love changes over time or still weakens

All of these answer options will make it clear to the interlocutor that you have no intention of continuing the dialogue.

In a friendly circle

Sometimes friends really hurt you. For example, you are sitting at some party of friends, almost everyone came in pairs, and you are alone. Some may ask: “How are you on the personal front? You’re already 30, it’s time to get married.” This is already a sore subject for you, but here it is. Don't show that you're hurt. Feel free to retort: “According to statistics, marriages after 30 are less likely to break up. So you, who got married a long time ago, have something to worry about” or “I’m getting married soon, it’s a pity that you can’t come, because we’re celebrating in Paris.” Such answers will prevent you from being offended another time and will demonstrate your sharp mind.

Answers according to circumstances

In order not to put yourself in an awkward position, it is important to understand that different responses are appropriate in a dialogue with different people.

At work

It’s common to joke with colleagues that things aren’t going well.

“Like a future millionaire: there is a desire to become one, but there is no money yet.”
“No better than a squirrel in a wheel.”
“Like a native, I walk around naked and eat figs.”
“Like potatoes: either they will be eaten within a year, or they will be planted.”
“Like a ball: they cheated and even kicked.”
"How are you? A lot of them. Do you want me to share?”
“It’s like being in the harem of a Turkish sultan. I know that they will definitely fuck, but it’s not clear when.”

In a dialogue with your boss, it is better to be serious, answer concisely, specifically and carefully integrate information about a specific achievement. For example:

“I’ve just started working on the project, and the results are already exceeding my wildest expectations.”
“I read a new book and am now implementing the knowledge I gained in life.”
“I learned a new skill and now I feel head and shoulders above.”

Take advantage of every opportunity to highlight your strengths: your boss will definitely make a positive mental note about you.

In conversation with parents

When you communicate with loved ones, it is better to refrain from barbs. Parents can take bad jokes to heart.

"Affairs? Let’s leave them to the businessmen, and let’s go have fun.”
“No changes, consistently good.”
“It’s great, because I communicate with wonderful people.”
“Wonderful, and I wish the same for you.”
“Today is even better than yesterday.”
“Everything is fine: growing, blooming.”
“Things are going well, life is in full swing.”
“Stable.”
“Through your prayers.”
“It’s good to be around you.”

Parents are absolutely sincerely interested in matters, so it is not necessary to limit yourself to a short answer. Share the details of your personal life and be sure to ask your loved ones answer questions.

In a conversation with a stranger

If you are interested in a person who is trying to get to know you, you should not answer briefly. On the other hand, talking at length can make you seem like a bore. Therefore, you can answer a question with a question in order to understand how detailed a conversation the stranger is still inclined to have. For example:

“Are you in no hurry?”
"And what do you think?".

I love a man, but his friends are annoying: how not to make him unhappy (by tearing him away from friends) and yourself (by continuing to tolerate them)

You can also demonstrate mutual interest with phrases containing a response question: “How are you doing?” If the stranger doesn’t appeal to you at all, increase the distance:

“Sluggish.”
“A question like that is a sure way to stump me.”
“I find it difficult to answer.”
"It depends on what you compare it to".
“When they don’t ask stupid questions, it’s actually pretty good.”
“I don’t think you’re really interested in this.”
“I’m going crazy with useless questions.”
“I’m thinking about how to get rid of an annoying interlocutor.”

Try to respond less often with rudeness; even strangers should be shown respect. After all, how you treat others is how they will treat you.

Answers to the guy you like

If you are a girl and not a modest one, you can take the bull by the horns:

“It’s like being on the Internet: click, like, and go to bed.”
“Like on Mars: there doesn’t seem to be any life, but I’m all on fire.”
“Great, I’m improving. Will you keep company?”
"Super. I guess everyone is jealous of me, because I get to chat with such a handsome guy.”
“I'm searching.”
“I’m in the mood to share my phone number.”
“It’s like I came to a buffet table: I’m standing there, embarrassed to ask for what I want.”

Still, in the first conversation it is better not to cross a certain line of decency. Try to stand out from other girls with a non-trivial answer, but it’s better if it’s not vulgar. Create some intrigue:

“I’m in a great mood, I’d like to go for a walk, but so far I haven’t received any offers from anyone...”
“Guess what, I’m giving you the opportunity to ask leading questions.”
“Wonderful, but it’s not very comfortable to have a conversation in the rain, I would like to go to a more comfortable place.”

The listed options are a sure way to win over a handsome guy you barely know.

Options for your ex

That's where there is room for your imagination! It all depends on how you broke up and what impression you want to create about yourself now. So the answer options can be completely different, from flirty hints about spending time together to distant phrases and even a little harsh:

“Try to guess three times! If it works, I’ll have a cup of coffee.”
“There is a bottle of a wonderful five-star, if only you were nearby - and everything would be fine.”
“Like a chocolate bar in the sun, I melt sweetly...”
“Wonderful, because I’m talking to you.”
"Guess! I’ll give you a hint: I sincerely smile during our dialogue.”
“Everything is stable, unchanged. It looks like there’s even a circle of interlocutors.”
“I’m doing some soul-searching.”
“What do you think? If you become a nuisance to a great time.”
“I don’t think you have any reason to be interested in this?”
Banal: “I haven’t given birth yet.”

A handsome man does not equal a good husband: how to determine that the chosen one is “created” for family life

There is no universal option for your ex; decide for yourself which one is right for you.

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It may seem that the main purpose of tactless whys is to get under your skin. But it is not always the case. Anastasia Krinitsyna, psychologist, senior lecturer at RUDN, explains: others quite often ask incorrect questions, generally pursuing good goals. So why do these lovely people make us blush?

Burning with curiosity

Those who lead a measured lifestyle, when nothing changes for many years, lack events. And they begin to spy on others: for example, reading scandalous details about celebrity relationships or gossiping about friends and neighbors. These people see in you the heroine of Sarah Jessica Parker and are looking forward to the next episode.

Delicious recipe! The child has a fever for the fifth day, what should I do?

Worried

Most often, this category includes relatives. Mom filled out your Tinder profile and terrorizes you: “When will you finally find a husband?” This is how parents suffering from overprotection behave. For them, you are still a little girl, and not an independent person. Don't worry, it will go away with time.

Looking for a common theme

A friend has changed: has she gotten married or is expecting a child? “Get ready for endless conversations about marriage and children,” the expert warns. Previously, you could spend hours discussing noisy parties and upcoming sales. But now her views have changed more dramatically than Katy Perry's image.

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They think in stereotypes

Those who are used to living according to a script can also ask uncomfortable questions. Everything here is predictable, like a concert in honor of Police Day. Any deviations from the “college-marriage-children-retirement” plan are unacceptable. Like inveterate gamers, they strive to move to the next “level”. And they think that you dream of hearing Mendelssohn’s march right after graduation from college.

Answers in English

If the instigator of the conversation decided to be original and asked: “How are you?” — answer in the appropriate language.

“I'm fine” is a standard option if you want to demonstrate that you are not particularly in the mood for a sincere conversation.
“Pretty good” is a more emotional option if everything is good.
“Very well, thanks,” - similar.
“Great.”
“As usual” - if nothing special has happened recently.
“So-so” - when things are so-so.
“Not bad” - if not bad.
“Pretty bad” - if everything is bad.
“All the better for seeing you” - if you want to emphasize how pleasant it is for you to be near your interlocutor.
“Why?”, an option for those who want to escape the dialogue, roughly means: “What?”

They probably won’t expect more detailed answers from you, especially if the interlocutor is a native English speaker. In his homeland the question is: “How are you?” often sounds on par with a simple greeting, and etiquette dictates that you answer succinctly.

Don't want to be considered a bore? Then you should not always answer any questions from your interlocutors sincerely and in detail. Now you know exactly how you can avoid banal answers to the daily question: “How are you?” Explore new ways to spice up everyday conversations and make them more interesting.

Signs of weak personal boundaries

They put too much pressure on you and take advantage of your soft-heartedness;
You do things for another person, and push your own to the side;
You don't know how to say no;
Feel guilty if you refuse others;
You are afraid of looking bad in other people's eyes, so you always agree to requests.

What are the dangers of shaky borders and why strengthen them? When you tolerate a violation of personal boundaries, you lose energy and vitality, move yourself to the margins of your own life, and lose your individuality. Working through personal boundaries is important for you to feel confident and safe in this world, to realize your potential, and not to indulge the will of others.