A very frequently asked question not only among young guys, but sometimes also among older men is how to explain to a girl that I need her? Undoubtedly, a large number of representatives of the stronger sex do not experience difficulties in communication. But often, seemingly self-confident and fulfilled men in life get lost in relationships with the opposite sex.
Let's look at a few recommendations on how to show attention to a girl.
Fear of being rejected
The main reason why a guy cannot tell the girl he likes about his feelings directly is the fear that he will be rejected. The interference is quite serious, but you need to deal with your concerns adequately. Even if you do everything in your power and still get a refusal, will it really permanently traumatize your personality? Life will go on and on. Therefore, it makes sense not to pay special attention to fears, because otherwise you will never know how the girl will really react to your confession.
Why doesn't she get enough attention?
If a girl complains that a guy doesn’t pay attention , most likely the relationship has lasted for more than a month.
At the initial stage, a couple in love spends all their free time together.
When feelings and emotions decline a little, men tend to go into work or hobbies. Sometimes - forgetting about the interests of the other half .
The main problem observed in relationships related to attention is the lack of any contact during the day . A loving girl can calmly relate to a man’s workload at work.
But if in a day he hasn’t even sent an SMS, hasn’t spent even five minutes with her on a social network, the girl feels abandoned and unnecessary. And sometimes he even thinks out the reasons for such a disdainful attitude towards himself.
In addition to the lack of direct communication, a girl may notice coldness in her partner’s behavior.
When, when spending time together, a young man is emotionally closed , reluctantly or at length answers questions, does not initiate topics of conversation, does not hug or kiss his beloved.
The detachment of a person nearby raises suspicions ; a woman can think of reasons for such behavior, which does not correspond to the real state of affairs.
Understand yourself2
If, nevertheless, fears do not leave you, you should find their cause. You are probably worried about your appearance, status, unsociability, or for some other reason. Having identified the moment that worries you, try to somehow correct the situation. It is also worth emphasizing all your advantages, but it is not worth striving for perfection at all - such people are often disliked.
What does it mean to pay attention?
Basically, it’s about actions that demonstrate the importance of a loved one.
Compliments, going to the movies, car rides, even just spending time together on the couch are good ways to show continued interest in your partner.
But it’s worth warning men against that category of girls who demand attention to themselves as the main attribute of a relationship.
In fact, on their part, we are not talking about signs of affection at all, but about affection and dependence. The goal of such ladies is to suppress the will of a man and control him.
Therefore, first of all, it is necessary to understand whether the girl really feels the man’s reduced activity , fading feelings, or is she simply trying to manipulate him and play on feelings of guilt.
Even when dating a normal, adequate woman, you need to remember a sense of proportion. There shouldn’t be too much attention either - otherwise you can ruin relationships and get annoying with your importunity, simultaneously forgetting about work, friends and important matters.
Therefore, there is no need to rush headlong into the pool and spend 24 hours a day with your significant other.
Share her hobbies6
Another way to explain to a girl that I need her is to gain her trust. Find out what she likes to do in her free time and try to share this fun. It’s a good idea if you know in advance about the girl’s interests in order to be closer to her. But if there was no such opportunity, do not be upset, because you can ask directly what she is interested in and how she likes to relax.
Methods
The following methods will help you show an attentive attitude towards a girl:
- Organize joint events. It doesn’t matter what to choose: visiting the theater, going out into nature or hanging out at home. The main thing is to take advantage of the opportunity to spend time with your beloved more often.
- Affectionate touches and compliments do not take away a man’s strength or empty his wallet, and a woman blossoms when she sees that her partner appreciates her efforts.
- A sign of attention will also be the willingness to please your beloved with gifts without any reason or special occasion.
- Do not limit your flight of fancy in your intimate life. Detachment in sex will lead the chosen one to suspect the appearance of a rival.
- Support your partner with both advice and concrete actions.
- Don't forget about the little things. A tired friend after a day of work is pleased to know that dinner is already ready. When returning home late in the evening, the girl will be delighted by a gentleman rushing towards her, who cares about the safety of her beloved.
The listed methods strengthen the connection between partners and make the relationship comfortable.
More humor8
It's no secret that women, regardless of age, are very sensitive emotionally. And signs of attention do not have to be expressed in expensive gifts. Just be there, providing your support and comfort, or better yet, try to make her laugh as often as possible. After all, as people say, if you manage to make a woman laugh, then half the job is done. But here, too, there is a fine line, because a girl can easily classify you as a friend. To prevent this from happening, express yourself more often by doing sweet or, conversely, courageous things. This will give her more opportunities to look at you from a different perspective.
But what to do if the girl you like is a tough nut to crack and no matter what you do, you can’t attract attention to yourself. To achieve success in this case, you need to carry out several manipulations. Make the girl herself become interested in you. There are several psychological techniques that can help with this.
You must become popular among other representatives of the fair sex, even if you are not interested in them. After all, if they don’t pay attention to you, then this particular girl will not be interested in you. It is worth educating yourself and being more responsible about your appearance. Stand out from other guys with your originality and mystery.
Once you get the desired effect, the main thing is not to stop. It is necessary to keep some distance. You must convince the girl that you have a busy schedule, a lot of meetings with interesting people, and you cannot give up everything at her request. She herself should strive to get into the circle of your friends and acquaintances. Of course, you shouldn’t go too far either. And at the same time you need to be kind and attentive. And with all the manipulations, remain yourself, because you won’t be able to play with a person all your life.
What to do if a girl demands him?
The first step is to listen and take a closer look at your behavior.
Perhaps the man, without noticing it, lost interest in the girl or became closed to conversations, stopped showing feelings and caring.
A man may stop showing love due to difficulties at work or in relationships with friends or parents.
After the girl has expressed her concern about the current situation, you need to analyze the last month of the relationship. Search for the reasons that led to a decrease in time spent together.
In other words, understand yourself. There can be two main reasons:
- Problems that take a lot of time .
This is an objective factor. In this case, you should tell the girl about them. If she sincerely loves a man, she will not only listen and motivate him to solve problems, but also offer her help. And, of course, such a heart-to-heart conversation will eliminate the understatement, since it will reveal the real reasons for the man’s employment. - Lost interest in the girl. And “things” are just an excuse not to spend time together. In this case, the guy should decide whether he wants to continue dating or whether he should end the relationship. But first, understand why interest has disappeared and whether it is possible to return to the previous level, when hours in the company of your significant other flew by.
After stating your position and calmly explaining the reasons, you need to monitor the girl’s reaction.
If she understands the man’s position and treats him with sincere care and respects him as a person, she will take part, at least emotionally.
At this stage, you can recognize an unpleasant type of girl with a selfish character. Such ladies need not just attention, but daily presence nearby.
They do not want to hear about the difficulties and failures of their partner; they treat him consumeristly in every sense . Including - they claim his main irreplaceable resource - time.
If the girl reacted understandingly, without causing a scandal, then in the future it is necessary to adjust the strategy of behavior with her. Namely, show more interest and attention.
How to do this is described in the last section of the article.
Do you call her often?
First, you need to assess the situation of all your relationships, since they are all different, and accordingly different methods for solving the problem. There is no one recipe for everyone, but thanks to the basics, you can build good relationships on your own. To do this, assess the situation and understand how often you call your girlfriend. If you are still in the early stages of a relationship, then you should call only when you are going to ask a girl out on a date.
Of course, you shouldn’t call every day and hear refusals. Call 2 days after the date and agree on the next one, then the girl will understand that you will not run after her, and will begin to try to win you over. Also, if your relationship has been developing for quite a long time, then you are also recommended to exclude continuous and daily calls to the girl. If a girl likes you, if she gets bored, she will call you back, even just to chat. It's all up to you, but if you want to understand how much attention a girl needs, you need to take action and experiment, otherwise you won't learn anything.
A little about obsession
Very often, signs of attention from a man are too intrusive. This can irritate a girl.
This manifests itself when a man can call many times a day or write letters on social networks. Many ladies don't like this behavior. Therefore, the relationship that the young man dreams of does not work out.
When a date doesn’t work out, try not to write or call that day, but give your loved one time. She must miss you. Only then will the lady understand how much she misses your attention and courtship.
Obsession will not lead to good things. After all, every person should have his own personal life. Your chosen one also wants to have personal space.
Shyness
There are guys for whom their shyness greatly hinders them not only when communicating with girls, but also in life. Such guys are afraid that a girl might leave them, they begin to worry and get cocky. Remember one thing: fear is the main enemy in this whole matter. Therefore, first engage in self-development, and then start meeting and dating girls. After all, your shyness is a sign of various fears, in order to fight them you need to be a brave and decisive guy, and for this you need to constantly and regularly engage in self-development. It will also be useful for you to read: how to stop being shy, since such guys not only do not understand how much attention a girl needs, they generally cannot calm down when dating and girls accordingly leave them because they have not received any attention.
That's all we were going to tell you about how much attention a girl needs. By applying all the acquired knowledge in practice, you yourself will be able to not only understand how much attention a girl needs, but also experience it all through mistakes and failures, and if you are weak in spirit, you will give up without ever building a normal relationship.
How much and how to pay attention to a girl. Video
Does a woman always need compliments?
Girls like beautiful words. However, do not forget that they must be from the heart. A woman feels flattery immediately.
For a girl, a person’s attitude towards her is very important. A woman loves compliments, but she must see sincerity in your eyes. Even in intonation, a lady is able to sense falsehood.
Creativity in compliments is very important for a girl. Tell her about her hairstyle or dress. A girl will be pleased with such a compliment, because she tried to create her image for your sake.
Signs of attention that every woman appreciates
Women need attention.
In fact, anyone needs attention, I'm serious! But women still need a little more, because, damn it, they are women! Even if you're an awesome boyfriend, you can always improve, right? And if you have a problem understanding women, this article should help you.
Welcome and goodbye kisses
Nothing helps us feel more at home than a kiss from a loved one in the morning and goodbye. Agree that this is nice for you, and how nice it is for a girl! When your lady leaves for work or when she returns home, greeting her with a kiss is one of the great ways to maintain a cordial relationship. The warm and friendly effect of these kisses reminds us of the time when our ancestors were apes, and showed their affection by examining them for small parasites. A welcome kiss means “I'm glad to see you,” and a farewell kiss means “I'll miss you.”
Snuggle up to each other
If you say something like “this is all calf tenderness, men do not lie in an embrace with their young ladies, wrapping them in a beard,” I will tell you that you are categorically wrong. Hugs are a key factor in a healthy relationship. If you find it unpleasant to hug more than once a day, your relationship cannot be called normal. Even the touchy one wants to hug and feel a loved one next to her more often. All this talk about how hugs prolong life is not a fairy tale.
Do nice little things
No girl will refuse a bouquet of flowers. The main thing, of course, is to choose those flowers that the girl really likes, so as not to make a mistake, otherwise the surprise may not be entirely pleasant.
Of course, not only flowers are the only joy for women’s eyes. Write her a note on paper and put it in her jacket, send her a couple of gentle messages on Skype, prepare breakfast, make her coffee, go for a walk with her in the park and draw something funny on the asphalt together with children’s crayons. Buy her her favorite chocolate bar, give her a funny hat, remember when her mom's birthday is. Lots of little things! The main thing is to have imagination, it strengthens relationships with girls.
Notice little things and give compliments
Girls spend a lot of time trying to look their best. They often do all this makeup, manicure, haircuts and other procedures so that people pay attention to them and admire them. Kindly notice this nonsense. Of course, there are women who do all these manipulations only for themselves (yes, man, they really do exist), and there are those who don’t take care of themselves at all.
Noticing a new haircut or that she's wearing a dress is important. The girl tries to look good, and if it really suits her well, you can and should praise her. It is not so difficult to notice that something has changed in a girl. If you don't notice this, there are two logical explanations. First: you don’t see the point in noticing such “little things”, because you are a man, this is not a man’s business, “women love it when everything is harsh and without tenderness” (underline what is appropriate). Second: you don't care about her. Small compliments will go a long way in any relationship.
Wash the dishes
Stop talking about how this is a woman's business. We live in a time when the border is blurring. Did she cook you a nice dinner? Why not wash the dishes afterward? This is a great sign that you truly appreciate all that she does for you, and the food was truly delicious. This is a subtle hint that “she is a woman, not a dishwasher” and stuff like that. After all, imagine she'll have to wash it all. She prepared the food, spent some effort on it, and now she will also have to wash the pots and plates while you sit in front of the computer, full and satisfied. Show some empathy, man!
Help her take off/put on outerwear
Nothing confuses women more than helping with a jacket or coat. You help her take off her jacket and hang it on the hanger. Obviously, she can cope without you, but this is a pleasant “knightly” little thing that will cheer up both you and her. This is from the same opera as opening the door for a lady.
Helping a girl get dressed is also a nice, embarrassing gesture on your part. If you imagine relationships in the form of a strip of the location of members of your squad from some computer game, helping with outerwear adds at least 10 points out of a possible 100.
How to show you care if she is much more than just a friend to you
1. Value her opinion and respect her decisions.
Respect her views and never force her to comply with your decision. If you care about her, you will never make her feel that her ideas are ridiculous or uninteresting.
2. Introduce her to important people in your life. To show that you care about her, you must allow her into your world. These could be your friends, colleagues, and most importantly, your family.
3. Plan your leisure time together - attending events, quests, walks, trips to stores, shopping lists.
4. Make a playlist for the car based on its favorite artists, music genres or compositions. The girl will be incredibly pleased to hear her favorite track when she rides with you.
5. Be there for her in difficult or simply emotional moments of life. Sometimes a silent presence nearby is more important than any words.
6. Be proud of her and don't be afraid to show it. Showing a girl that you care also means recognizing her achievements and congratulating her on her successes. Feel free to tell everyone how lucky you are to have found such a wonderful girl.
7. Remember the dates that matter. Add them to your to-do list or reminders on your phone. This is important: caring is remembering your special days. You can't even imagine how happy you will make her.
8. Make her feel wanted . Make her feel that she is an important part of your life, that her presence is very important to you. This can be done simply with words. Show that you want her not only as a girlfriend, but as a life partner.
9. If she comes to spend the night with you / lives with you, then buy her the little things she needs - a brush, comb, slippers, cozy pajamas, a book, a phone charger. It's very sweet and shows your sensitivity.
How often to call a girl at the beginning of a relationship. How and when to call a girl after meeting her
So, you've successfully met a woman you really like and exchanged phone numbers with her. So what now? What if she forgot you? What if you get nervous when talking on the phone and lose your composure? What if she's busy on the day you want to meet? What if she's busy doing something much more important than answering the phone? What if a man answers the phone? What if she gave you the wrong phone number? There's no need to worry about that. If you just relax, making that first phone call can be a very simple process.
How long are you going to wait after receiving a phone number before making a call? Some say they call the next day, others say they wait three days. This is all wrong. There is no fixed waiting period. It's more a matter of how long you can wait. In other words, if you met a woman, you had a mutual attraction, and your new friend asked you to call her, you can wait a whole week. She won't forget you.
However, if you met a woman, talked for a few minutes, exchanged numbers, and then saw her talking to other guys all evening, you should call her the very next day. Because if you don’t create that same mutual sympathy and impress a woman within forty-eight hours, she will most likely completely forget about you.
When it comes to making phone calls, the cardinal rule is: don't miss the moment. Call while your meeting is still fresh in the interlocutor’s memory, but still not too quickly. And don't call too often so that she doesn't consider you an intrusive boyfriend.
Some pick-up artists advise turning on the anti-caller ID function before calling a woman. They also advise not to leave a message on her answering machine if she doesn't pick up. Their logic is as follows: if you keep calling, sooner or later a woman will pick up the phone, and, having caught the “fish”, you can persuade her to meet.
I don’t use this hack method and I don’t recommend you use it, unless, of course, you are doing telephone sales. The point is, if a woman doesn't call you back or doesn't pick up when you call her, the problem isn't your phone skills. The problem before was dating. Apparently, you failed to demonstrate the qualities necessary for her to want to see you again. In reality, problems at any stage of communication usually mean that you made a mistake at a previous stage.
So never block your caller ID and always leave a message. Why? Because it shows your confidence. If you demonstrate an attractive personality, your worth and importance, and inspire trust when you first meet, a woman will be happy to hear from you.
Your goal is that after every conversation with you, the woman will worry: “What if he doesn’t call?” If you did the right introduction, when you call, she will know what you are talking about and will feel comfortable.
Here's a general conversation structure to follow on your first call.
Although this script is very simple and has been used successfully by thousands of men, it is not the only way to handle the first phone call. Once you get used to this process, you will be able to set yourself apart from the crowd of other men by calling for the first time only to quickly talk and schedule the next call.
If you prefer SMS, still refuse them on the first contact. On the other hand, if you have fallen into the trap of messaging on answering machines without even having a chance to chat once, SMS can be a good way out of this situation.
If a woman doesn't respond with anything specific to your proposals or rejects several invitations in a row, it's time to check your dating patterns. You probably made a mistake somewhere in the early stages of your communication. Perhaps they demonstrated low social value, were too desperate to achieve it, or exchanged numbers too early. Perhaps your style (or lack thereof) doesn't fit her criteria for a relationship. Find out what your weak point was and work on improving it. In some rare cases, when you've done everything right and the woman is still acting up, it could mean she has a boyfriend or has just broken up with someone.
In general, never accept “very busy” as a regular excuse. If Angelina Jolie called you and invited you to a dinner she was hosting at her estate with Bono, Jay-Z, Bill Clinton and George Lucas in attendance, would you be able to go? Of course you can! You will cancel any plans, skip work and go there on your hands if necessary.
Your goal in every interaction is to be so interesting and rare that the woman will never be too busy for you. After all, if you meet the best girl, will you try to make time for her? So be like one of the top ten!
Source: How and when to call a girl after meeting So, you have successfully met a woman you really like and exchanged phone numbers with her. So what now? What if she forgot you? What if you feel nervous when talking?
How to make a guy pay more attention to a girl. Part 2 Work on the situation together
- 1 Organize a date night. Set aside a night just for the two of you so you can spend time together. Have a date night on this night every week. You don't have to do anything special, just let him know that the relationship is very important to you.
- 2 Find some activities and events that you two can attend. Go for a walk, have dinner together. Try something new, find a hobby that you both enjoy. Try to remember what you did when you first met.
- Be creative and try to bring something new into your relationship to make it sparkle with new colors. Invite him to do something together that he enjoys, and have him do the same for you.
- 3 Laugh. Laughter can bring people together, especially in tense situations. When you spend time together, try watching a comedy or going to a comedy show. You can tell each other some jokes. Don't underestimate the power of humor.
- Another way to make a person laugh is tickling. Tickling is a sign of affection and a way to flirt. This is a great example of how to make concessions in a relationship.
- In addition, tickling often leads to arousal.
- 4 Compromise. Accept that your boyfriend may like things that don't give you any pleasure. Remember that he has his own needs. If he likes to watch TV and you like to go out, plan to spend one evening watching a movie and the other going for a walk.
- The same applies to arguments. If you realize that a tense situation is brewing, try to assess and analyze it. Don't focus your attention on who "wins" the argument. Your goal is to build relationships. Remember that in a dispute almost always everyone remains unconvinced.
- 5 Try to make friends with his friends. You don't have to try to change yourself to fit into his company, just be cheerful and positive. Likewise, invite your boyfriend to hang out with your friends.
- Be sure to respect each other's personal space. Don't think that you will always spend time in his company. And you shouldn’t put pressure on your boyfriend by constantly inviting him to your place.
- 6 Respect your partner. Remember that every person needs personal space and freedom. Even if your goal is to get a guy to spend more time with you, you shouldn't constantly hang on to him. This will most likely only push him away.
- Don't try to change your boyfriend. Support him when necessary and accept that he must have friends.
- You shouldn't play with him. Don't try to get his attention back by becoming less accessible. Don't provoke him - it won't lead to anything good.