How to keep a lover - basic rules and nuances

It's no secret that lovers are not husbands and it is almost impossible to keep them by the force of responsibility for children or simply because you have been together for a long time. Therefore, thousands of women who have them sooner or later ask questions: “How to keep a married man/lover close to you?”, “How to make a married lover jealous and afraid of losing?”, “How to tie a married lover to you?”, “How seduce a lover? etc.

Of course, there are women who, under no circumstances, will date married men for moral reasons. There are also ladies who will never hold anyone back and will not even ask such questions. They, as a rule, are absolutely self-sufficient and self-confident, therefore, if a man begins to grow cold towards them, they will easily let him go and find someone else.

But there is another category of women. They cannot imagine their life without a man, without their loved one, and, realizing that the wife, in principle, has more rights to him, they try to keep the man with all their might.

Peculiarities of behavior of a married man

A married man is often very different from a single man in many ways. He is influenced by his wife and even her relatives. A lover is a man who has some peculiarities in his behavior. Knowing these features, as well as human psychology, you can build strong and long-term relationships (even taking into account the fact that the man has marital ties). Since a married man is influenced by his wife, in some situations he may not show love and affection to you. In this case, it is important to understand that your complaints will not lead to anything good. Rather, you need to show restraint and do everything to ensure that the man is satisfied both physically and mentally.

Zodiac signs and psychological techniques of seduction

When seducing male representatives of different zodiac signs, you need to consider the following:

  • Aries. A man of this zodiac sign is by nature used to being a leader. Therefore, you should not flirt with him too obviously. If a woman shows herself to be unapproachable, a man will spend a lot of energy on conquering her;
  • Calf. The earth sign has a taste for feminine representatives of the fair sex. Many Taurus are characterized by slowness, calmness and self-confidence. In a companion, he values ​​weakness and aesthetics most of all. When communicating with a representative of this zodiac sign, you should not demonstrate aggression and pressure. A woman can be emphasized as being ready for a serious relationship. But this readiness should not scare a man away;
  • Twins. Representatives of the stronger sex belonging to this zodiac sign are characterized by unpredictability and inconstancy. Each of these men seems to have two different personalities. To attract the attention of the “hero of your novel” you need to have an excellent sense of humor and a certain amount of adventurism;
  • Cancer. Such men have a sensitive and slightly nervous nature. They sometimes show gloom and gloom. When communicating with a representative of such a zodiac sign, you need to show loyalty to all his new affairs. When building a relationship with Cancer, great patience, romance and correctness will not be superfluous;
  • A lion. Representatives of this zodiac sign are distinguished by their passion and tendency to dominate. They can become an easily accessible trophy in the hands of a woman who skillfully masters the art of flattery. Leo is used to constantly listening to compliments. This makes him feel like the best: gorgeous, strong and strong smart. Leo does not allow other men to overshadow his triumph in the “arena of life”;
  • Virgo. The main traits of a representative of this zodiac sign are practicality and sober thinking. But even a “stone” heart can give in under the pressure of female wisdom. A representative of the fair sex should abandon excessive emotionality and demonstration of her own sexuality in favor of logic and common sense;
  • Scales. A man who is nervous and lacks self-confidence dreams of a woman trying to win his affection. But such behavior requires enormous effort from the mistress herself. You should not be jealous of such a man. It would be much more logical to demonstrate advantages over possible rivals;
  • Scorpion. A jealous and insidious man of this zodiac sign is used to surrounding himself with mystery. But deep down, the dangerous Scorpio dreams of a strong and mysterious passion. He does not tolerate any sign of weakness in any aspect of the relationship. The main disadvantages of a representative of this zodiac sign are coldness in communication, taciturnity;
  • Sagittarius. The fire sign has a weakness for well-groomed and elegant ladies. In order to capture the heart of a Sagittarius, you need such character qualities as playfulness and lightness. A representative of this zodiac sign is like a “big child”. This circumstance should by no means be discounted;
  • Capricorn. The winter sign really needs tenderness, warmth, and an open demonstration of kindness. At the same time, you should not try to make Capricorn jealous. This can be dangerous;
  • Fish. Among the representatives of this zodiac sign there are many manipulators, people characterized by imbalance. Pisces are characterized by sudden outbursts of anger and short temper. When communicating with such men, you need to moderately combine affection with a demonstration of romance;
  • Aquarius. Such a man is attracted to a woman’s brightness, unusual style of thinking, and impeccable appearance. A fan will definitely never feel bored next to such a woman.

A man should feel your attention and affection

In order to understand how to keep a married lover, you need to know the basic rules. If you are always happy to have his company, show affection and care, then he will certainly return to you again and again. Here you can play the opposite. In comparison with home, he will feel comfort and coziness (both physical and mental). His wife may be irritated and even angry. You must be the complete opposite. So that the lover understands on a subconscious level with whom he feels better and more comfortable. By showing your joy and satisfaction, you thereby bring the man closer to you and distance him from his own wife.

Psychologist's advice

Every woman needs to understand that there is no universal advice. Only in a personal consultation, with live examples and analysis, will a psychologist be able to give practical advice or draw your attention to some possible problems.

Generalized solutions should be used with caution. How to keep a young lover is completely different from a relationship with an older man. Phlegmatic or choleric, introvert or extrovert - any little thing can affect the result.


Every love story has its own nuances.

You need to independently analyze your relationship, your past and the man’s character.

  1. How did your relationship begin?
  2. Who was the initiator - you or the man.
  3. How many mistresses did he have before you? For what reasons did they break up?
  4. What exactly attracts him in an affair - passion, understanding, respect, etc.
  5. How long have you been together?
  6. Did he make any comments to you, criticize you or forbid you to do something?
  7. Did he confess his love, sympathy, or give compliments? What exactly does he highlight about you and your appearance, character?
  8. Do you have common hobbies or something else that connects you besides sex?
  9. Do you see each other in everyday life or are your meetings solely for intimacy (for example, you can be colleagues, neighbors, or friends with his wife).
  10. What kind of women irritate him?
  11. What do you know about his wife, their relationship and the situation in the house.

The answers to these questions will help you understand your tactics. If he likes to pursue women, you can make changes in appearance and distance yourself a little. A conservative will be dissatisfied with sudden changes in plans and surprises. One man, if ignored, will be fired up with the excitement of the hunt, while another will lose interest in the unavailable woman.

The better you know your man, the easier it will be to please him and tie him to you.

Always be in good shape

Many girls think about the question of how to keep a married lover, and often lose sight of basic things. Such an important factor as good physical shape has not yet been canceled. A beautiful, toned body is not only sexy, but also so attractive that a man will come back to you again and again. One of the best exercises for staying in shape is squats with dumbbells or a small barbell. It allows you to emphasize the sexuality of the buttocks and keep the body in good tone. In addition, your lover should see you in beautiful clothes and, of course, sexy lingerie. Keeping a lover is quite simple if you take into account all these nuances. A beautiful and well-groomed body, sexy underwear, elegant style, all this attracts a man. Your lover will be excited and excited by you. He will be drawn to you like a magnet. He will always think about you and want you.

Visual attractiveness2

People are greeted by their clothes... This saying is as old as time. The bright and sexy appearance of a woman who appears on the horizon of a man stuck in family life will definitely attract his attention. Of course, there is something to look at after the gray mouse that your own wife has turned into.

It's no secret that free women take better care of themselves - fitness clubs or gyms, swimming pools, massages and, of course, stylish and appropriate clothing, hairstyle and appropriate makeup. All this makes the task of making your lover fall in love with you much easier. A radical difference from the wife, who decided that, having got a man as her husband, she could completely stop taking care of herself.

High-quality sexual relationships are the key to keeping a lover

Keeping a lover is quite simple, if you also take into account the factor of sexual relations. A lover is a man, and for a man sex is very important. Scientists and sexologists have found that most men do not receive complete satisfaction from sex with their wives. And, often, they go in search of a woman who will satisfy their fantasies and can diversify their lives. Considering the above factor, it is worth doing everything to ensure that your lover is as satisfied as possible sexually. A man should be simply happy after sex. If he likes it, then on a subconscious level he will constantly think about you.

How to make a guy fall in love with you, surefire ways

Step 7: Make eye contact and drive him crazy

© Polka Dot Images / Photo Images

It’s not for nothing that they talk about love at first sight. Sometimes, just one glance is enough to drive a guy crazy.

Look closely into his eyes, meet his gaze. This look is all it takes to light a spark and turn a man's head.

Your eyes, gaze and the right moment can create real magic with a guy. You can awaken emotions in him that he didn’t even know about!

Step 8: Surprise

© Comstock/Photo Images

It is necessary to surprise a man by fueling his interest in you. Surprises are an important and integral part of our lives.

Show him that he doesn't know you well. He must constantly discover new facets of you.

For example, if he is used to seeing you in a formal dress, wear sexy shorts and an original T-shirt so that he can see that you are not afraid to be different.

If he is used to you being responsible and punctual, take one day off from work and just spend it with the man you love. Have a blast together, have so much fun that you will remember this day forever.

This is especially true for married couples. After all, as a rule, relationships are ruined by everyday boring routine and routine.

It is very difficult to maintain a relationship as it was at the beginning of your acquaintance.

Therefore, various surprises and pleasantries are simply irreplaceable in a relationship.

Do something he doesn't expect from you!

But the most important thing is to always remain yourself. You shouldn't try to become someone else, you just need to show him the other side of your character.

If you do it right, he will definitely want to see more of what you have to offer!

Do not impose your opinion on your lover and do not make claims

A lover must understand that he is welcome and feel the difference in his relationship with his mistress and his wife. Claims and demands are far from the best way to get your way. A man must be led to a solution to a certain issue carefully, as if he himself made this decision (without your participation). When thinking about how to keep your lover, do not forget about the fact that the difference between the relationship with you and with your wife can be the turning point that will play a decisive role. A situation may occur that a lover will choose you as his wife.

Psychology of a married man

When starting romantic relationships on the side, men behave differently. Some carefully hide the fact of betrayal, others are not afraid of anything and openly take risks for the sake of new experiences. Usually a married man has a permanent mistress by the age of 35-40. At this time, he is experiencing a midlife crisis and is in dire need of a person who can feed him with his energy, give him self-confidence and add variety to his usual way of life. Reasons why a married man takes a mistress:

  • he just gets bored and wants new emotions;
  • tired of the monotonous intimate life with my wife;
  • quarrels constantly break out in his family, scandals flare up;
  • the man is polygamous by nature.

A mistress is an outlet that allows you to escape from everyday troubles and family problems. With her, he gets a lot of pleasant emotions and impressions in bed, which he cannot boast of with his legal wife. But for a man, his mistress always remains in the background.

She spends weekends and holidays alone, she lacks confidence in relationships and in the future.

READ Why a lover doesn’t give gifts: a psychological explanation of the reasons

Accept a man for who he is

Criticism is not the best way to keep a lover. A lover, as a rule, receives his portion of negativity and criticism at home (from his wife, mother-in-law, etc.). As stated earlier, you should be the complete opposite. The man will certainly return to where he felt good. Therefore, it is important to accept him as he is. You should not constantly monitor his actions and comment on his actions at the slightest provocation. Apart from irritation and reluctance to communicate with you, you will not achieve anything from him (in this way).

Signs that a man is ready to cheat on his wife

Cheating doesn't happen out of nowhere. Discord begins in the couple, the husband prepares mentally and physically for the appearance of another woman. There are many signs that someone has begun to seduce a married friend.

Taking care of your body

The man had not previously been involved in sports, but now he began to actively visit the gym and achieved results. He became lean and muscular, increasing his attractiveness since skinny guys cheat more often.

READ

How to take a married man away from your family and marry yourself

The chosen one is at risk; it is possible that someone is trying to attract him into their life.

Wife's appearance

Over the years, the wife stops paying attention to her appearance and stops preening for her husband. But a man still remains a visual person, even if he tells his wife that she is already beautiful, he still looks at other women.

Change of image

If you notice that a man carefully selects his wardrobe, starts wearing a new perfume, or changes his hairstyle, this may mean that he wants to please other women.

Husband's reproaches

The man begins to say unpleasant things to his wife and pay attention to her shortcomings. When he compares his wife with others, this is a reason to think that his dissatisfaction is connected with an outside girl.

No talking

The spouses have stopped having casual conversations, and all their communication is limited to discussing everyday problems. It's time to worry. When a husband does not want to share his experiences and thoughts, it means he is hiding something.

Lack of wife's attention

A woman who is busy raising a child, having a hobby or working, stops caring about her husband. In such a situation, she may not even notice her husband’s betrayal.

READ

Why do married women have lovers?

Lack of sex

The main reason for a husband's interest in other women is coldness in bed or refusal to have an intimate life with his wife. If a man has stopped taking the initiative in sex, it means he is satisfying his needs on the side.

He became perfect

The husband became attentive and caring for no reason. In ordinary life you wouldn’t expect a gift from him, but here he brings flowers and surprises. With the help of such simple tricks, the cheater tries to make amends for his guilt.

He is inseparable from his phone

Previously, a mobile phone was freely available, but now the spouse even takes it into the shower. When a message arrives, he is in no hurry to read it, more often turns the phone upside down, and does not always answer calls.

Feeling betrayed

Often a woman herself feels that a man has someone else. Intuitively, she is visited by thoughts that she tries to drive away. Maybe the subconscious is warning her this way.

Don't force yourself on your lover

There is a wonderful expression by the great A.S. Pushkin - “The less we love a girl, the more she likes us.” But it also applies in the opposite direction. This does not mean that you should be indifferent to a married man. But excessive imposition can play a cruel joke on you. You should not ask a married man to take you to public places where there is a risk that you will be exposed (or you will be reported to his wife). A man should feel safe. If a man doesn’t want to, then you shouldn’t ask him to meet his friends. In this case, he will feel the necessary comfort zone and feel completely safe with you.

How to keep your lover close to you

Sometimes a little manipulation can be applied. Especially if there is an opportunity. We are talking about the impact on male jealousy. Having achieved a woman, he considers her his. And if he feels that he is starting to lose his prey, he will tighten his grip.

The main thing is not to overdo it, so as not to push him away with your frivolity or indifference.

  1. Change your appearance . Dramatic changes in the style and image of the woman he loves can make a man jealous. Who are you preening for? And on a psychological level, men love variety, and a new image will create the feeling that he has a new partner.
  2. Change your schedule. You cannot be predictable and submissive, especially if a man has fallen in love with your character. Cancel an appointment without a valid reason. Don’t reveal all your cards at once, at first it’s just “it won’t work today, I’ll explain later.” And don't answer messages or calls for a while. On the other hand, make sudden meetings, intercept him on the way from work or wait in the cafe where he usually has lunch.
  3. Ignore him for a while . A few hours, but don't delay. Don’t answer, don’t write, don’t get in touch in any way. Let him be nervous. It is especially effective to use after some mistake of his - a rude word, inattention, lack of a birthday gift. Then he may be seriously worried that your silence is a sign of a breakup.
  4. Flirting . Use with caution because this method can be both very effective and dangerous for the relationship. You need to flirt wisely - do it carefully and ambiguously. So that when he begins to suffer and rage with jealousy, you can play the cards and look innocent. Flowers in the apartment, gifts, a smile to the waiter, an SMS from a friend, etc.

Proceed with caution because you could make a mistake that could cost you the relationship. Look at the man’s reaction and plan further actions based on it.

Praise your married man as often as possible

Praise is pleasant for almost every person. Praise from a woman whom a man has chosen as his mistress is especially pleasant. Your wife's criticism and your praise will be in strong contrast, and the lover will certainly feel this difference. Say more positive words. Express admiration for the man. The psychological component is no less important than the sexual sphere of life. Always remember this. A man may not feel approved of his actions at home and at work. This negatively affects a person’s mood and state of mind. Therefore, it is important that he feels as comfortable as possible with you. He should hear pleasant words from you, and then your relationship will go in the right direction.

How to make a guy fall in love with you 10 ways

Step: 1 Become an independent woman

© Christina Morillo / Pexels

An independent woman is one who can make a man lose his head and drive him crazy!

There is nothing more seductive and attractive than a girl who knows who she is, what she needs, and who does not need anyone's confirmation or approval.

She knows what she wants and how to get it. She never needs anything, never complains about anything.

This is the type of girl that just drives men crazy.

She is strong, independent, does not rely on anyone, men are attracted to such people. There is something attractive about the fact that she doesn't need him, but still chooses him.

Such a woman is capable of making anyone fall in love with her.

Need to show love and respect

The very concept of lovers comes from the word love. Every person needs love. Without this, it is very difficult to find harmony and peace of mind in life. Men are not as stupid as they might seem at first glance. A man will be able to understand whether they love him or not (sooner or later). Sincerity of feelings is very important. By showing love, affection, care and respect, you can make sure that a man does not want to return to his wife at all. The relationship between a man and a woman is very complex and multifaceted. Not all people are psychologists and can understand the reasons for a particular action of a person (in particular a lover). As they say, men are from “Mars” and women are from “Venus”. But, nevertheless, the nuances indicated in the article will help you in establishing strong and long-term relationships with your lover. Who, most likely, can become your husband (if, of course, you set such a task for yourself).

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How to get attention in correspondence

If live communication is impossible (rare, insufficiently effective), you can interest a married man through correspondence.

If you are unfamiliar (completely unfamiliar), first study the profile of your chosen one on social networks. What kind of family does he have, what kind of relationships does he have, do he have children. What he is interested in, what he listens to, where he goes. This will help start communication and find common ground. Next, adjust your page: attractive photos, the same music/groups/views as your potential lover, funny pictures, interesting statuses. In your first SMS, you can write to a married man about the similarity of interests: “I noticed your statements about girls, I absolutely agree with every word!”, “I can’t pass by travelers/artists/musicians, you are amazing in this photo”, “Last week I fished Soma is much larger than yours,” “Man, you have a gorgeous Apollo figure. Where do you study, if it’s not a secret?”

It’s rare when men ignore interest in their direction, so at least a dry dialogue will begin. If correspondence is reluctant, continue to develop the topic of common interests, otherwise the interlocutor will jump out of the conversation. Next, you can already claim friendly, unobtrusive communication: ask how the working day was, whether he got wet today (otherwise you are wet to the skin), what he will be watching on TV in the evening. To make your interlocutor fall in love, show genuine interest and surround him with attention. Change your profile photo from time to time, let people look at you from different angles. Over time, he will wait for your light SMS every day, starting to feel sad online without your appearance.

Describe your advantages and at the same time learn more about your married chosen one. “I love baking. By the way, what kind of cuisine do you like?”, “Yesterday I was given a certificate of appreciation at work. Is it just my working day that lasts 12 hours or is everyone so crazy?” etc.

When communication has become deeper and there is flirting in it, move on to more active words and frank questions. Start teasing your interlocutor. Write to a married man in SMS that a photographer you know invited you to a candid photo shoot. Say that you have never participated in such events, but you really want to try. This will introduce your partner to conflicting feelings: on the one hand, it will excite him, on the other, he will not want anyone to look at you. Make a promise to submit a photo for evaluation if you decide to do so.

Advice from a psychologist: do not mention your wife in correspondence, much less discuss her. Firstly, it will remind the man that he is doing the wrong things, and secondly, he will instinctively begin to defend his choice. No matter what kind of wife you are (fat, tastelessly dressed, funny, ugly), keep your mouth shut. This communication concerns only the two of you, there is no place for others.

If a man is ready...

Sometimes men live with their wives out of habit, simply because it is necessary. Feelings have long been dulled or faded, but comfort is a powerful incentive to stay in the family. The wife cooks, cleans and washes, takes care of and cares for. In this case, an affair with a married man can easily develop into something more.

The situation will become more complicated if the man has children. He may feel guilty and go out “on the sly” so that the family doesn’t find out. In this case, it will be much more difficult to take him away. Wives take advantage of this and manipulate their husbands, each time emphasizing his responsibilities and demonstrating their helplessness. Most men fall into their position and continue to play the role of a good husband. A mistress needs to show herself as an independent and self-sufficient woman; this will certainly attract the attention of her chosen one. He must be sure that he does not “hang” his passion around his neck.

Distance and inaccessibility

When a man is “ripe”, he is ready to attack his passion immediately. But a woman must remain unapproachable for some time and keep her distance. This will help him understand that not everything is so simple. You need to distance yourself from him a little, give the man the opportunity to prove himself and achieve his beloved. Men are designed in such a way that they value much more what they have put a lot of effort into. The same goes for women. The chosen one must understand how bad he feels without this particular woman and how good he is next to her.

Married woman and young guy

It happens that women who have been married for a long time need to keep a young sex partner with them. This is what motivates guys to get involved with a captive woman, especially if she is significantly older:

  1. Lack of responsibility. A woman bound by marriage, in most cases, only needs intimate relationships, so she will not demand the fulfillment of any conditions or obligations. In addition, infrequent dates may be enough for her.
  2. Experience in the intimate sphere. She can attract a young man because she can teach him the secret techniques of love.
  3. Complexes. If the age difference is significant, you need to think about the reason for such a connection. Perhaps it lies in childhood complexes brought into adulthood, that is, obtaining psychological comfort.
  4. Material benefit. The lover begins to live off the funds allocated by the woman.

These circumstances must be taken into account, since most often there are specific motives behind a young man’s desire to commit himself to a relationship with a married lady.

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