A woman’s betrayal can be caused by many reasons, but, as a rule, it differs from a man’s and is practically never spontaneous. In most cases, this is caused by the actions of a man. When the betrayal is revealed, the man is faced with the question: “is it worth forgiving the girl’s betrayal?” The blog has prepared an article on this topic.
Most in this situation remain categorical and do not want to think about any forgiveness. Any questions are answered that it is easier to observe and give advice. A person is guided by his own principles and moral criteria, therefore, after separation, he acts in his own way. To make the most correct decision about whether to forgive a girl, find out the reason for the action.
- Frequent scandals and domestic conflicts become a reason to think about whether it is worth continuing the relationship;
- A banal lack of attention often becomes the cause of women's resentment. Regardless of the number of years spent together, a woman expects due attention from her beloved. Romance does not depend on gender and does not disappear over the years. Men often ignore this and later face problems;
- The banal fading of love. This sounds sad and many people go through this. A lot of books have been written on this subject, there is a lot of advice from psychologists that will help you avoid this at the beginning of a relationship and after many years spent together. Loss of feelings leads to a dead end;
- Loss of respect. Raising your voice at your partner, verbal insults are the first signs of disrespect. Don’t make excuses, but rather think about whether you allowed someone you respect to be insulted or offended? One rash word, a decision, will lower you in her eyes;
- Jealousy certainly leads to one result. If a companion is upset after learning about her rival, she may act in the most unimaginable way. In such situations, it is not common sense that wins.
One of the above reasons is most likely the culprit of infidelity and repeated betrayal. It is worth drawing conclusions so as not to encounter this terrible situation, which will inevitably lead to a breakup.
What to do: break up or forgive betrayal
The answer of numerous experts to the question: “Is it worth forgiving a girl after cheating?” ambiguous. There is no universal solution. Each situation is purely individual, and its reasons can be completely diverse. Don't follow the majority's opinion. The most important thing now is to find the reason for looking for love on the side.
The heart will tell you whether to forgive betrayal. Do a thorough analysis, find out whether the relationship lasted for a long time when it first happened. If she repented, and the betrayal happened only once, then perhaps it’s worth giving a chance, because no one is immune from mistakes. True, this is usually what men do, who are called “aleni.” The main fact here is, can you continue to live, realizing the betrayal? Forgiveness is half the battle, but forgetting everything is not easy. If you doubt that you will be able to cope with this, then maybe you shouldn’t go back, because it will only bring additional pain. You need to understand that when this happened for the first time, there are no guarantees.
What often happens is with your ex-boyfriend, here you become hostage to their past passion, which was not forgotten by them. What to do, definitely leave them alone and remember the two words “third wheel”, it definitely turned out to be you.
In case of betrayal at a distance. Here we mean greater temporary isolation from each other. This is also not an excuse. It means I wasn’t expecting you and didn’t value my feelings. Most likely she needs you as a source of income who sends money from her earnings. And in your absence, she has fun and manages your finances.
How to deal with a situation with a girl who was in a relationship also gives a clear answer that you need to dump her. She is unreliable and be glad that she is not married and has no children with her, if so, then you are lucky. This will help you avoid financial losses.
Cheating on a girl while drunk can be considered one of the most common; its whole essence is visible here. Namely, the inability to control oneself leads to fatal mistakes. Why do you need a frivolous and accessible woman who can become so if she consumes an extra 100 grams. I also put emphasis on childbearing in the presence of such a bad habit, what it can give birth to and from whom.
Men's views on whether betrayal can be forgiven vary. It’s one thing if it happened once and again, when it lasted for a long time, and the betrothed was not going to tell. Unfortunately, such relationships are doomed. You understand that this happened intentionally, which means that feelings for your lover overshadowed your relationship with you. This is a real betrayal, so think carefully about whether it is worth associating your future life with such a woman.
If flirting and affairs happen on a regular basis, then you should leave such a partner as soon as possible. Even great love cannot change the current situation. Come to terms with the idea that this is simply not your person, and boldly move on in life.
If you have made a mutual decision to keep the couple, then be sure to take a short break. This will create balance, relieve angry feelings and resentment. Don't find out the details of the affair. Reconsider the mistake of the love union and correct it if possible. Leave the past in the past!
Advice from psychologists
“A girl cheated on me, what should I do?” Guys and mature men often turn to psychologists for help with this question. Mental health experts offer the following advice:
- Calm down and come to your senses. If a girl was burned, she confessed to cheating, you need to go through this stress alone.
- Assess the prospects of the relationship. Ask yourself one question: what is better for me to live with a liar and suffer, break up and start a new clean relationship, forgive and change the behavior of my beloved? Choose the option that suits your character and life values.
- Talk to your girlfriend or spouse, discuss the decision you made. Listen to the woman’s arguments, try to understand the motive for the action: maybe you provoked the betrayal?
- Make your final decision. Understand whether there is love in the relationship, whether you can trust your partner in the future.
- Break up permanently or forgive the cheater. Promise yourself not to remember the past every time you quarrel, if you save your marriage or couple. Or leave the liar.
- Try to regain trust. If you have forgiven your spouse or friend, you need to revive the love. Let go of your fears and don't become paranoid. Start your relationship with a clean slate.
- Don't cheat in retaliation. Infidelity out of spite will not give you peace of mind, but will only make the situation worse. This is a sure path to separation.
Now you know what to do if a girl cheats. Make the decision to continue the relationship or break up with a cool head. Wait a long pause before having a serious conversation with the woman you love. This way you will definitely be confident that your action is correct.
What to do for forgiveness
Forgiving a loved one for betrayal is not easy, but if she confesses and sincerely regrets, this gives hope for continuation. You don't need to be a psychologist to be confident. The main thing is to feel regret and see it in her eyes. If during communication a girl looks away, then perhaps she is simply lying and making up excuses. Firm eye contact tells her that she cares about you. Pay attention to your emotional state. If she doesn't want to lose you, then she will cry and her pupils will be dilated. A trembling voice and wet palms are a good sign. The nervous state in such a situation continues for a long time, even when they said that they are ready to forgive. There is no test for treason, but careful analysis will help to understand further intentions.
The most humane solution is to live separately. Being alone with your thoughts will help you think and understand what happened. This time will allow you to heal mental wounds and come to terms with the fact. And most importantly, it will tell you how to behave and live on. Perhaps you will get bored, there will be an incentive to return and renew the relationship. Do not delay, as a long period of separation can play a bad joke. A few weeks of separation is enough. If during this time you haven’t felt the desire to hug or kiss her, then let it stay that way.
How to forgive if resentment and anger do not go away? The conflict will disappear when emotions subside and balance comes. This can be done by directing thoughts and actions in the right direction. A great solution is to join a gym. Regular exercise will help calm excessive emotions. It is better to choose boxing and, whenever possible, beat the bag until exhaustion. It does not hurt, and you will feel the effect of the training soon.
It is advised to change your attitude towards your partner. It often happens that the problem lies there. Excessive severity or, on the contrary, softness, could well have become the cause of the crisis. Try to feel the warmth of your partner. Remain calm and balanced in any situation, do not make hasty decisions.
If you want to find a reason that will help you forgive a girl for cheating, then think about your common future. If aspirations and dreams coincide, you are going in the same direction, then the problem is no longer so global. Talk about children, a cozy apartment, pleasant evenings in an embrace. If you see yourself together and imagine it clearly, then perhaps this is the answer.
It is important to know whether the relationship was platonic or whether there was emotional betrayal. You can come to terms with platonic betrayal, but emotional betrayal is more difficult. If a girl has feelings for someone else, then attempts to restore the relationship will fail. Emotional dependence is stronger than physical dependence.
If the desire to forgive your beloved persists, then try to find an excuse for the action. Perhaps this happened out of desperation. The main thing is for the girl to realize that she has made a huge mistake. If she repents and wants to correct the situation, then give her this opportunity. An honest confession is the first step towards forgiveness.
Is it necessary to forgive out of pity for oneself? Often guys forgive a girl out of fear of getting lost, believing that after parting, life will lose color and will never be the same. It is necessary to understand that this is self-hypnosis. These are temporary problems that you just need to get through. This has happened to many people and will continue to happen, so there is no reason to suffer.
Be sure that fate will not leave you alone. When you are ready, she will definitely set you up with the one and only.
The main reasons for female infidelity
The weaker sex is monogamous by nature, so if a girl cheats, in most cases there are certain reasons for this.
In other words, a certain (usually negative) situation must arise that would push a woman to take such a step.
Among the reasons are the following:
- Loneliness, emotional vacuum. If there is a lack of understanding, communication and normal contact between partners in the family, this can serve as an incentive to cheat. Of course, in such a situation, the girl will not immediately go “left”; as a rule, more than one year passes before she makes up her mind.
- Boredom. As a rule, after a man has already won a woman and the “candy-bouquet” period has passed, stagnation sets in in the relationship. In this case, the stronger sex ceases to surprise and delight its partner. In this case, the woman may go in search of new experiences.
- Sexual dissatisfaction is one of the most common reasons for cheating. The problem may lie in both the quantity and quality of intimacy. Frequent refusals from the husband, lack of pleasure - all this leads to the wife having a lover.
- Revenge - do not forget that an offended woman is incredibly insidious and easily succumbs to emotions. If a wife finds out about her husband’s infidelity, she may well want to repay him in kind.
- Emotional immaturity. This applies to girls under 25-26 years old. At such a young age, representatives of the fair sex often want adventure, bright impressions, and so on, which is why not the most pleasant situations arise.
We should not exclude situations in which a girl cheats on a guy simply because of her character. Polygamy in women is not so common, but it still happens.
Polygamy also occurs in women
Don't change in response
Of course, to forgive a girl’s betrayal, you need to be a strong person. This indicates that a person can do much more for the sake of his beloved. Girls should grab such a man with their hands and never let go.
Guys often flirt and do rash things. I start to abuse alcohol and often visit nightclubs to pick up a girl for the evening. Such revenge is simply unacceptable!
This type of revenge will completely and forever destroy the relationship. Responding to betrayal with betrayal will demonstrate that you no longer have anything in common. The person hurt you, but don’t stoop to his level, act differently. If you are not going to forgive, then break off the relationship and do whatever you want.
If a girl cheated on you, then DON’T: 5 stupid mistakes that don’t suit a real macho
If such trouble has happened that the girl you love has cheated, remember that the worst thing you can do in this situation is:
- create a scandal comparable in scope to the Battle of the Ice.
Hey, man, you are a man, not a high-society girl in a hysterical fit;
- asking, like a Gestapo officer from a partisan, why exactly the girl cheated on you.
And what will this change if the fact remains a fact? Do you want to heal your wound once again? Do you want sadomaso?
- run after her shouting: “Come back, I will forgive everything!”
How to forgive betrayal?
Even if the girl had such a thought, then after she sees you as a weak-willed slug, you will probably lose her;
- think about soap and rope, pills and other suicidal nonsense, get drunk “to death.”
Seriously? That is, you think that out of the remaining 3 billion women, no one is suitable for you, and therefore life loses all meaning? Come on…
- make your motto “I will take revenge and revenge will be terrible!”
Maintain your self-respect and don’t even think about spreading gossip about a girl, setting her up at work, and even more so – assault in a dark alley and love spells.
All this is not a man’s business, oh, not a man’s thing...
Cheating on the girl you love. Is it necessary and possible to forgive?
Signs of female infidelity. Life after betrayal.
Don't pay attention to the opinions of others
What will people think when I find out that the guy has forgiven the girl? People's opinions vary and many are highly dependent on it. Someone will say that he is a saint for doing this, someone will condemn him and call him a rag. There is no way to avoid this. There is only one way out - not to pay attention.
Your life concerns only you! Everyone has a lot of problems, so let them better deal with them. To prevent others from having reasons for gossip, do not wash dirty linen in public. If you change, don't complain to everyone you meet. Let your problems remain yours, they are of no interest to anyone. People love to gossip about someone, but they are unlikely to offer help. Immediately stop any gossip or unpleasant expressions addressed to you.
The first signs of betrayal
The girls hide their betrayal with great difficulty. With a high degree of probability, sooner or later she herself will admit everything. However, if there are certain signs to look out for:
- Sudden secrecy. It’s worth thinking about if your spouse or girlfriend starts changing or setting passwords on your computer or phone on social networks. This behavior is especially suspicious if it has not happened before.
- Coldness in relationships, bed. After going “to the left,” a woman can change a lot, try to keep her partner at a distance, deny him intimacy.
- Excessive aggression, nagging. The wife may begin to blame and reproach her husband for any reason, even the most insignificant.
- The emergence of new friends or increased communication with existing acquaintances.
- Often disconnected or simply “unavailable” mobile phone.
- External changes. If a wife suddenly starts taking extra care of herself, loses weight, changes her hairstyle, starts wearing more beautiful clothes, this can also become a kind of “bell.”
Guys often think that “the girl cheated on me” if they notice one or more of the above signs in her behavior. However, you shouldn’t jump right in and you can never rule out the fact that your imagination is running wild.
Secrecy is one of the signs of betrayal
How to protect yourself from a girl cheating on you
What can you do to protect your relationship from cheating? First of all, you should adhere to the following recommendations:
- No matter how long people have been together, you shouldn’t think that something like this will never happen. In any relationship, no matter how ideal, sooner or later a split may occur.
- You should keep an eye on your chosen one. This expression does not mean that it is necessary to regularly test the lady’s fidelity. Rather, it is recommended to pay attention to the girl or wife, reminding why the spouses once got married.
- Set boundaries of what is permitted. You shouldn’t forbid a girl to go to meetings with her friends, or a wife to sometimes take a break from everyday life, but all this should happen within certain limits. The same applies to men themselves.
- Sex is an important and integral part of any marriage. We should not forget about such an important rule. In addition, the process of physical intimacy should not become commonplace or routine. In intimate matters, you can and should experiment.
To be together you need to pay attention to your partner.
Is it necessary to accept a woman for the sake of a previous relationship?
But not every man is capable of this, because the woman still remains so wonderful, idealized even after betrayal. Unfortunately for most men. Strict conditions are very important, but here a woman may not agree to them, but a man does not need such a thing.
Men, have value, there is no need to try to accept a woman for the sake of maintaining a relationship, especially for the sake of children. Children should live in a normal, full-fledged, happy family, where there is no betrayal. So that for them this does not become an example to follow, so that for them it does not become some kind of norm, that people cheat on each other and then live together.