Inappropriate on social networks: why people are rude to you, and how to defend yourself if you are attacked


Unfortunately, we are not always able to orient ourselves in time and react correctly in situations where someone insults us. Subsequently, we become upset not only because of the very fact of other people’s insults, but also because we failed to give a proper rebuff. In many cases, you can avoid these upsets.

How to respond to an insult with humor and sarcasm

Many people make the mistake of clearly showing the other person that their words have offended them in some way. Of course, when we are insulted, it is not easy to control ourselves and not show that we are offended and “touched to the quick.” And yet, if you fail to cope with this task, then your opponent will understand that he managed to achieve his goal and truly insult you. No matter how difficult it is for you, try to make it clear to the person that his words do not bother you at all. The best way to help you with this is humor, which often helps you react quickly in unforeseen situations.

If you stock up on a few witty phrases, then, for sure, they will later be able to help you out at the right time.

Examples of such remarks:

  • Your words do not surprise me at all. I'd be surprised if you said something really smart.
  • And nature really has a great sense of humor, since it creates specimens like you!

What if he wants to stop being offended?


What if a miracle happened and a person perked up, realizing his responsibility for his own grievances, and wanted to get rid of them?

Everything is simple here. Give him a link to this page, where he will find out how to get rid of grievances, quickly, on his own, without psychologists and chatter.

If he starts working on himself, then he will warmly remember this incident with resentment towards you as a starting point in upgrading his awareness.

And he will thank you.

How to respond to insults and aggression

How to behave when you are insulted

Situations may be different, so it is advisable to adjust your behavior in accordance with them.

  • For example, if you yourself have offended a person, and you understand that all his insults are just hurt pride and an attempt to take revenge for the insult, then it is better to remain silent. The interlocutor is likely in agony, and with additional remarks you will further aggravate the situation.
  • If you are being offended undeservedly or “out of the blue,” then your opponent probably wants to “blow off steam,” and it is quite possible that you simply fell into the hands of someone else. Of course, in this situation you should not be a “punching bag” - put the offender in his place!
  • If you are insulted by a person who is clearly in an inadequate state, then it is better not to have anything to do with him and not to get involved in a dialogue. We are talking about a person who is hysterical or under the influence of alcohol or drugs. You will not be able to prove anything to such an interlocutor, and it is even quite likely that with your answers (any!) you will provoke him to a new stream of aggression or even the use of physical force. It is better to avoid communicating with such people, even if you are superior to them in physical parameters - you should not get involved in a skirmish that is unlikely to end in anything good.

What to do if you are called names

Undoubtedly, such a situation is offensive for any person, and sometimes we do not know how to react to insults. There are times when it is better not to get involved in a conflict and simply ignore unpleasant remarks - for example, when they are uttered by a drunk or completely out of control person. It’s another matter when the interlocutor approaches this consciously. So, what caustic words can you respond to the words of a rude person?

  • Your imagination and intelligence are so primitive that these insults do not offend me at all.
  • It's amazing how easy it is for you to offend someone. Fate will do the same to you, you'll see.

In general, it is worth noting that most often boors deliberately try to provoke us to some kind of reaction. We often notice that someone else’s rudeness can arise completely out of nowhere, or the reason is so insignificant that an adequate person would not pay attention to it at all. It's just that boors cannot deprive themselves of the opportunity to offend someone.

Most often, in such cases, we are advised to ignore the attacks of an ill-wisher, and such recommendations are instilled in us from childhood. And yet, such advice, as a rule, has practically no effectiveness - in practice it often turns out that a person who has escaped punishment for his sabotage becomes even more impudent. If a boor is constantly ignored, then he subsequently becomes convinced that everything is allowed to him. Therefore, it is important to remember that we should never ignore the insults that sellers, administrators, cashiers and other random interlocutors “bestow” on us during their working hours. The most appropriate response to such behavior is to contact your superiors, whose task is to competently select personnel.

How to adequately respond to rudeness and rudeness

You may well get out of this situation gracefully if you calmly agree with the boor. This technique has a particularly disarming effect on some people. So, if someone is trying to insult your mental abilities or “take advantage” of your appearance, then half agree with these words, and then thank your opponent for taking the time to find your shortcomings. This method is very effective when spectators are present during its implementation. You will not insult the boor in return, but at the same time you will put him in an awkward position.

How to put in place a person who insults

Many people are highly suspicious, and if you meet just such an instance on your way, then, of course, you can scare him with inevitable retribution “from above.” After the phrases below, the offender will remember the dialogue with you for a long time.

  • There is no desire to respond to these insults. However, the day will come when you will understand that all the misfortunes have been acquired by you, starting from this day.
  • It so happens that we pay for everything in this life. Remember this day to know why God is punishing you.
  • From now on, you'll have nothing but bad luck. I'm not scaring you, I just know about it.

How to intelligently send a person away without swearing

If you don’t want to swear in response to someone else’s unpleasant statements, but still think that you should fight back, then it’s quite possible to respond intelligently, but still put the person in his place.

  • They say that behind insults a person usually hides his complexes and inadequacy. Think about it.
  • It feels like insult is the only way you can assert yourself.

How to shut someone up with one beautiful phrase

Sometimes there is no desire to engage in a verbal altercation, and you want to shut the person up by uttering just one destructive remark. There are many such phrases, and they affect everyone differently. Here's an example:

  • They say that when a person is not particularly intelligent, the only thing he can do is stoop to insults.

When he insults his superiors

In this case, unfortunately, we do not always have the opportunity to respond the way we want, so the smartest thing to do would be to simply walk away from the conflict. If we are talking not about the boss, but about a colleague, then there is also no need to escalate the situation - try to answer neutrally.

This technique can also be useful at a time when your boss is insulting you: while the boss says unpleasant things to you, mentally imagine a small capricious child in his place. In your imagination, calm this baby down, pat him on the head, feed him milk porridge. This will make it much easier for you to listen to insults, and perhaps even your mood will not worsen. In addition, the boss will probably be able to appreciate your resilience.

"Buy an elephant" method

Many people remember a joke from childhood, when an opponent was asked to “buy an elephant,” thereby infuriating him and almost driving him into rage. You can do the same. To each barb, answer the same thing in a bored tone: “So?”, “And then that?”, “Really?” and in the same spirit. Undoubtedly, by the end of this monotonous conversation, the boor will experience a real decline in moral strength.

Improvisation

In a conversation with an insulter, try to use the effect of surprise, surprise and disarm him with this. For example, you may laugh out loud in response to unpleasant words, as if you had heard the funniest joke. You can also sneeze, oh. In addition, you can smile good-naturedly and say: “Surely your parents are ashamed of your upbringing.” Try improvising!

How to learn to respond to any insults with dignity

If you understand that the insults addressed to you are completely unfair, and you guess that your opponent also suspects this, then you should shame him. How can I do that? The first thing you can do is use certain phrases. If the person insulting you is conscientious enough, then such words will be able to penetrate him.

  • Never stoop to insults without properly understanding the situation. This doesn't make you look good at all.
  • I hope the day comes when you are ashamed of everything you said.
  • It's strange that I had a much better opinion of you.
  • I hope you're just trying to look worse than you really are.

There is no doubt that the person trying to insult you simply wants to somehow assert himself or stand out. At the end of his monologue, you may well ask coldly: “Well, did you manage to assert yourself at my expense?”

In general, when communicating with such a person, sincerely try to understand what his true goal is, what he wants to achieve with his words. At these moments, it is not so important what exactly your opponent tells you, but why he does it.

If you cannot find an answer in a difficult situation, then at least try not to lead the matter to mutual insults and impulsive reactions. Don't play by the rules they try to force on you.

It is also important to learn to calmly respond to any rudeness without “losing face” and your sense of dignity. Although it is difficult not to admit that cultural treatment rarely makes a strong impression on a boor.

When it comes to trolling or other provoking situations, the best thing you can do is ignore such a person.

Correct response to insults

  • It happens that we want to respond, but you know in advance that any of your words simply will not have an effect on the offender. Of course, in this situation it is better not to waste words and energy, but simply abruptly end the dialogue.
  • It often happens that the person “attacking” you actually has nothing against you personally - he’s just in a bad mood. In this case, it is enough to ask him the question: “Bad day?” An adequate person will not argue with this, and it is even possible that he will apologize.
  • It is often better not to lead to retaliatory insults. Try to avoid this situation by asking your interlocutor what he told you. Pretend you didn't hear his words. It is quite possible that the person has already regretted what he said. If the “attack” continues, then, apparently, you have a rare boor in front of you.
  • During some dialogues, we are simply stifled by the desire to attack our interlocutor. And yet, be that as it may, it is very important not to get to this point - you will almost certainly regret it. Try to keep your mind calm. It will be ideal if you learn to parry with witty remarks and not show that the provocations offend you in any way.
  • It is impossible not to mention one of the most common mistakes made by people who were forced to face insults. It's about making excuses. Often, having heard offensive words, we try to prove to our opponent that he is being unfair to us. With such tactics, you will undoubtedly find yourself in a position of humiliation.

Insulted by a stranger

If a person is drunk or clearly out of his mind, then you should still ignore his words - just try not to notice him. If we are talking about a stranger who did not like something about your behavior, then try to understand the situation, and then act “according to the circumstances.”

Insulted by a loved one

Here it is important to immediately understand why the conflict situation occurred and what provoked it. It is better to prevent the spread of a further quarrel, and frankly tell your loved one that he offended you, and you are hurt by his words. Try not to hush up the conflict, but to talk openly, clarifying the matter.

Abstract yourself from the situation

How to abstract yourself from a situation that causes resentment? There are several effective techniques available even to those who have never been interested in meditative practices.

How to abstract yourself from the situation:

  1. Take revenge on the offender mentally. Close your eyes, turn on your imagination and imagine the picture of the punishment in detail. Scientists have long come to the conclusion that our brain is indifferent to the format of visualization and if we have presented something, the brain can count this event as accomplished and stop being offended.
  2. Make a list of your grievances and complaints against the offender, and then burn it with the words “I forgive you.” Don’t ask “what to do with the list”? It is the list that needs to be burned, not the offender.
  3. Turn off the sound, at least after the fact. The next time you replay an unpleasant and offensive situation in your brain, imagine that it is happening on the TV screen and turn off the sound. Enjoy the picture of how the aggressor helplessly waves his paws and silently opens his mouth, twisted with anger.

Now let’s summarize all the tips and recommendations on how to leave the past in the past, how to forgive an offense and whether this should always be done.

How to forgive an offense:

  1. Develop a sense of humor and not be offended by jokes, humor, statements and anecdotes if they are not addressed to you personally.
  2. Learn to understand people and understand the motives that make them offend others, including you. This will make it easier to develop combat tactics.
  3. Eliminate toxic people from your social circle, with whom you have nothing in common and on whom you do not depend in any way. No person - no problem.
  4. Formally agree with the person on whom you depend that he is right about something. This will trick your brain because you can't be offended by something you even partially agree with.
  5. Instead of being offended by a loved one the next time, ask them directly about the reasons for the attacks or ask them to refrain from making inappropriate jokes or comments. Often this solves the problem completely.
  6. Distance yourself and abstract yourself from the situation - take revenge mentally, burn the list of grievances, turn off the sound of the grievance.
  7. Insults inflicted in the format of direct insults should not be forgiven, but rather demand an apology. In difficult cases, contact law enforcement agencies and the court.

To make it easier for you to cope with grievances, or better yet to stop being offended altogether, we recommend taking our “Mental Self-Regulation” program, which will help you learn to keep yourself under control in any situation.

We wish you exclusively positive communication and positive emotions from this life!

We also recommend reading:

  • Storytelling
  • 10 life lessons from The Lion King
  • How to deal with unconstructive criticism
  • Formation of correct self-esteem
  • Victim Syndrome
  • Top 7 ways to leave the past in the past
  • Questions to Find Meaning and Happiness
  • Forms of verbal violence
  • Overcoming the fear of confrontation
  • Hurtful words and insults: how to react and defend yourself
  • How to fix your mistake

Key words: 1 Communication, 1 Psychoregulation

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