Features of female egoism
The selfishness of women and men differs in the tasks assigned by nature to representatives of different sexes. Men need to prove their strength and worth, and a woman has to oppose something to male strength at any cost, since she cannot physically win.
A selfish woman in a relationship with a man tries to manipulate double standards:
- I am weak - I need to please, take care of, not offend, pamper with expensive gifts, forgive insults and whims;
- all people are equal - we should take care of the house equally, go out with friends the same amount of time, let everyone have their own account, because I go to work no less than you, but first we will spend your salary on the household, and then we’ll see.
The woman thinks through her plans far ahead. First she tries to find a good father for her children - rich, handsome and healthy. If the first result is achieved, the child is born, the mother often tries to create a cloudless life for him and herself, neglecting the interests of the father.
Egoist - who is he?
We all know that an egoist is someone who puts his personal interests above all others and thinks only about himself.
Is egoism always a manifestation of the EGO? Probably not always. What we call selfishness is often a manifestation of some instinct, inattention, greed, or characteristics of upbringing.
On the other hand, both EGO and egoism can manifest themselves in altruism.
Causes of manifestation
The essence of a woman's selfishness in a relationship lies in the wrong behavior of her parents. Girls mistakenly perceive themselves as the center of the universe, growing up in a family:
- With one child, where she was taught that she was the best, things and toys were bought only for her, her whims were satisfied at the flick of an eyelash. Entering adulthood, a girl with such baggage of conceit will demand parental dedication from her partner, without thinking about his needs and desires.
- A room with many children, in which whoever sat down first ate. In such families, children are not always friendly and ready to help. Living in a large crowd of people, where parents spin like squirrels in a wheel, and are not able to pay much attention to their children, a girl may consider herself not loved enough and deprived. And having matured, he strives to get more and more from life. Inspired by childhood grievances, such a girl thinks only of herself in a relationship with a man.
Those close to you will easily notice the signs of a selfish girl, in a relationship with a man, expecting full return from a partner who is obliged for her sake to be successful, young, attractive and healthy. What she is able to offer to a man who matches her concepts is a big question.
What is super ego
The human super ego became a mental new formation with the advent of society and its norms. It was the presence of common values, ethical rules and norms that formed the need for a new psychological structure that monitors compliance with all these rules. To put it simply, the super ego is beyond the “I”, i.e. that category that is designed to organize many different individuals and requires compliance with rules that are good for the majority even to the detriment of the happiness of one.
Of all the internal components related to self-perception, the superI is the last to be formed, since this requires active social interaction. This is the formation of an internal moral and ethical concept after a long period of its replacement by a parental figure. If at an early age the categories of good and evil are differentiated and their observance is monitored by parents, then this function is transferred to an internal perspective and everyone has their own parent inside.
The super ego has two levers to control human behavior.
The first comes through negativity - it is formed by parental punishments for misconduct, which later manifest themselves as conscience and shame - regulating social feelings. Animals and small children do not have such experiences, but only desires and the search for a way to achieve them. The second management option is idealization, which is formed through parental encouragement. When everyone is told how to do the right thing, described a model of an ideal person (kind, attentive, helpful, etc.) and praised for fulfilling requirements, then a connection is formed in the psyche where love and good attitude are possible only when behavior is as close as possible to the ideal. Hence the syndromes of excellent students and the desire to please everyone - this is only a mechanism for regulating social behavior.
What a super ego is can be finally understood when a person himself is able to regulate his desires, controlling surges of the id and redirecting the resulting energy towards self-realization and development. The harmonious formation of this category leads to social success, and the personality remains harmoniously developed inside - there is no need to take out hidden desires in a negative way, there is no need to lead a double life, balancing between the id and society.
When can you really be called selfish?
Men find the difference between their own and women's egoism in the fact that the stronger sex concentrates on its own goals, without giving due attention to others, and women do the same, but at the expense of others.
Experts in the field of family relations consider it necessary to have normal selfishness - to live without allowing oneself to be humiliated by a partner, to be able to say “no” in time. But after a while, the manipulative signs of a selfish girl in a relationship begin to disappoint a man who is trying to smooth out the rough edges.
The partner resists and tries to explain his position. And if on his way he actually met a selfish woman who, in a relationship with a man, does not disdain any methods of influence, the climax will be the refusal of sexual contact for failure to fulfill her desires. She will suddenly begin her period, get a headache, or need to go to bed early before an important meeting tomorrow.
What is a person's alter ego?
A person's ego states may not always reflect what is present. There is an alter ego, which is a person or character described in a story or film that in many ways reflects the main characterological traits of the author, but is not them. It can also be a deliberately embodied image for performances and ultimately assigned to the person himself. In royal dynasties, the alter ego is used to characterize the viceroy, those to whom power was transferred during the absence, inability to make decisions, or death of the current ruler.
Also, the mention of this term refers to pathopsychological categories, when one of the multiple personalities receives significant rights and begins to control the life of the individual in decisive situations. The second variant of the name is false ego, which describes dissociative disorders or split personality. It manifests itself as a temporary splitting of a person into several persons, while one has no idea about his second parallel life and the specifications of its activity. Addictions, temperament, habits, circle of acquaintances and type of activity, differences in perception of one’s gender or age may differ. This does not apply to a special image of another person, a game or deception - this is a painful mental state that requires medication correction and psychotherapeutic direction. Such disorders can arise as a result of deep psychological trauma or acts of prolonged violence of any kind. In all cases, this is an adaptive reaction of the psyche aimed at changing one’s own personality in relation to critical conditions.
When a person’s alternative ego is caused by a disease, and not by special social orders (transfer of power, playing a role), then hospitalization is necessary. Previously, such conditions were equated to psychotic ones and were treated with medication; at the moment, psychotherapy that eliminates the consequences of violence and psychological trauma is in great demand and, most importantly, effective.
Definition
Ego is a concept in psychology that represents one of three psychological entities (along with It or Super-I). This concept was first proposed by Sigmund Freud when he described the dynamics of the development of the human psyche. According to Freud, the Ego is necessary for the implementation of executive functions and represents a kind of mediator between the internal and external world of a person.
Thanks to this, a person develops continuous but consistent behavior. In this case, a personal starting point is realized, starting with those events that are preserved in memory. They relate to existing data and those events that are occurring in the present or may possibly occur in the future. The ego does not belong to either the psyche or the body. Although certain bodily sensations may manifest themselves in the process of personality formation.
Also, according to Freud’s theories, in the process of development of absolutely any individual, differentiation of the Ego begins to occur and at the same time the Super-Ego develops. This means that a person develops certain inhibitions, and the function of controlling instinctive impulses improves.
As a rule, this happens at the moment when a person begins to understand and appreciate parental as well as social standards. In the course of this, certain moral conflicts arise that are necessary for the growth of the individual.
However, even when a person reaches his physical maturity, each individual differs from the other, which is explained by the development and effectiveness of the Ego. Freud called this concept “Ego Strength.” If a person has a strong Ego, then he is more objective, better evaluates the world around him, as well as himself.
Such people plan their lives better, make decisions, never hesitate and choose the best option from alternatives. If a person has a poorly developed ego, then his behavior is more reminiscent of a child, that is, he perceives the world around him in an excessively distorted way, which is why he is not able to achieve great success. In addition, people with a weak ego are often diagnosed with neurotic syndromes.
The Ego was also considered by Carl Jung. He described this concept as a complex that contains all human consciousness related to the psyche, including the unconscious and collective unconscious. In his opinion, the Ego is awareness of one's body, existence, memory. He viewed the Ego as a complex of mental factors and described this complex as something that has a very large attractive energy, which is capable of drawing contents from the unconscious of the individual.
Later, Jacques Lacan examined this term. He described the Ego as an imaginary substance that begins to form as one passes through the so-called mirror stage. In his theory of psychoanalysis, the Ego is the opposite of the Self. At the same time, the specialist emphasized that the Ego is an imaginary part of the psyche, which is given to a person as a standard analyzer, capable of applying certain knowledge.
Many other scientists have also studied this concept. For example, some have viewed the ego as the connecting center between a person's personality and environment. Accordingly, in the process of development of the individual, the Ego begins to stand out much more and covers the surrounding world to a greater extent, and also influences the personality.
