What can you write to your ex after a breakup?

When it comes to correspondence with your ex, text messages can work in your favor, but only if you use this method of communication wisely.

It is especially important to pay attention to what to write to your ex-boyfriend in order to interest him and make him return. Of course, you can’t say a magic phrase after which he will crawl back. The perfect text sent at the right time is what will pave the way to success.

Texting your ex does pose a risk that he will reject you or simply not respond. For this reason, be mentally prepared for any development of events, especially if the guy left you. If you feel that you will not be able to endure negative scenarios after you write to your guy, then first devote more time to working on yourself before taking such a difficult step.

What you can and cannot write

First of all, let's talk about what you can and cannot write to your ex-boyfriend:

You cannot write while intoxicated. This is always a very bad idea. On a sober head, you will regret this action.
Don't do it just because you're lonely. You need to make sure that your ex is the right person, and the relationship will be different this time.
Get rid of excessive emotionality. Men are not prone to emotionally difficult conversations. This means don't send him messages like, “I can't stop crying. I don't know how to live without you.” This will only push the ex away and reduce the chances of returning.
Don't start a fight to get attention. Even if you get an answer, the conversation will definitely go in the wrong direction in the end.
Obsessiveness. If he doesn't respond, then just leave the man alone. There is no need to write millions of times: “Are you there? Hello???? Why don't you answer me?? Something happened? Just answer so I know you’re alive!” If a person doesn’t answer, it means he doesn’t want to do it. Is it worth causing additional irritation and humiliating yourself, especially when he abandoned you. You can read more about the signs that your ex wants to come back in our separate article.

Mistakes you shouldn't make after breaking up with your boyfriend

Women are very emotional creatures. And in the heat of the moment they can do a lot of things. As a rule, in stressful situations the mental activity of the brain is switched off.

There is nothing you can do to hold a man back, neither with children, nor with youth, nor with “stomach”, nor with blackmail, nor with hysterics. He stays with the woman he wants to live with.

Therefore, NEVER DO this:

do not humiliate yourself and do not beg him to return;
there is no need to threaten, insult, frighten with physical violence, or humiliate;
agree to be a litter i.e. for intimate meetings without obligations;
attempts to appease with gifts, bribery;
blackmail;
obsession.

“No contact” rule

In order to understand when you can write to your ex after a breakup, follow an important rule - wait a period without any contact. As a rule, this is at least four weeks.

You cannot text, call or communicate during this period.

It doesn't matter if it's the guy's birthday, whether he's made any positive changes in his life, etc. No contact means no contact.

Why is this point so important? The period of no contact gives him the opportunity to get bored, which he cannot do if you are always looming in front of his nose or blowing up his phone or social networks with messages. Four weeks of no communication can also help you get rid of the intensity of emotions after a breakup and gain a clearer understanding of what happened.

After this period of no contact, if your ex hasn't texted himself, then you can make contact through whatever means you want. Text messages are usually the easiest and safest method.

The exception to the “no contact” rule is tragic events. You can write to your ex for support, but be very careful and not verbose.

The text options below are good ways to reconnect or get people thinking about you in a more romantic way, but only after a four-week period of no communication. This is a must!

Simple reasons why girls write to their exes

If, after breaking up with a man, your head is filled with thoughts about what to write to your ex in order to get the relationship back, then you must first understand what exactly you want to achieve with your action. Why do you need to return him or will friendly communication with him be enough? Decide on this point before writing a message.

Girls decide to write to their former lovers first for the following reasons:

your relationship ended somehow wrong;
you still miss your ex-man;
according to astrologers, you are ideally compatible;
perhaps the alcohol that affected you is to blame;
desire to correct mistakes;

3 important steps

which every woman should go through

Anika Snagovskaya

Author and presenter of women's trainings on harmonizing feminine energy. Master of removing limiting beliefs and master of constellations.

I have prepared three lessons for you that will help you better understand yourself, remove the restrictions that prevent you from feeling loved and living happily.

Video lesson with meditation: 5 states of femininity

You will learn about 5 female states that exist in every woman, how they manifest themselves and which archetypes are most manifested in you and which are not developed.

Video lesson + meditation: How to let go of past relationships

I’ll tell you what you need to do to free your heart from old feelings and break the energy threads connecting you with your past partner.

Audio recording: Neuro-af

Thanks to this neuro-affirmation, you can regain self-love and feel sincere gratitude and happiness for every day.

Take your gifts!

When writing a message to your ex-lover, consider the following:

the text must be correctly structured;
you need to decide whether you really need it or not.

Don't forget to mention in your message his good character traits for which you valued him so much. Men are not indifferent to such words. But there is no need to write about love.

Happiness and ease

Men love happy women. When you feel good, they enjoy being around you and talking to you. When a girl is always negative and emotionally unbalanced, then men prefer to stay on the sidelines.

There is nothing more attractive than a positive and happy woman.

Be sure to keep this in mind if you want to text your ex.

Just one little happy and light-hearted text can do wonders. It will also show the guy that it is safe to approach you. Perhaps the ex wanted to write the first one himself, but was not sure that you were in any good mood. With a happy, carefree text, you show that you have gone through all the terrible emotions and are ready for a new life.

Starting a conversation with your ex-boyfriend with vague or banal formulations, such as: “How are you? What are you doing?" - it’s not worth it. This may make your ex a little wary of the conversation. He doesn’t know whether you are friendly or going to start a scandal. The best way to re-ignite the spark is to recall a shared positive experience. This will direct the conversation in the right direction and have a more positive tone.

The message should show that you are thinking about the past, but not necessarily about your ex specifically. That you don’t cry into your pillow every night, thinking about him, but continue to live, and only sometimes some things remind you of the past. Or, for example, you think about some happy memory and feel comfortable discussing it with your ex.

For example, you could write something like: “Hi. I just wanted to know if you ever tried bungee jumping, which we looked at recently. I tried it and really liked it! I recommend."

If you changed...

Female infidelity has long been included in the 7 deadly sins for modern society. Therefore, you have to pay much harder. If a man is unfaithful, many may complain about his male freedom or midlife crisis, and in general, they have forgotten and forgiven. Then, if the wife turned out to be unfaithful, everyone who finds out about the offense will be branded with shame and dissuade the betrothed from reconciliation.

In this case, you should act wisely, weighing your actions and words. In order for him to still consider the sincerity of his repentance and eventually return, his beloved should write a sincere, long and piercing letter as a farewell, here are a few examples:

“In all family troubles, both are always to blame. But not in this situation. This is entirely my fault, my mistake and my sin. I succumbed to my emotions, and after that there was not a minute that I did not regret what I had done. It hurts me to breathe, realizing with each awakening that you are not with me and cannot forgive me. Accept my repentance and know that I love you with all my heart.”
“My mistake has taken everything from me, the air that I breathe, the earth that gives me support, the water that saves me from thirst. But I am ready to accept all these hardships, if only you would be near me again. Having stumbled, the criminal receives a prison sentence. So tell me, how much is measured out for me? I love you and am ready to wait for your forgiveness.”
“I am very sorry that I made you suffer. Every day before going to bed and immediately after waking up, I reproach myself for my mistake. Guilt in front of you does not allow me to move, breathe and feel this world again. Please listen to me, give me a chance to fix everything. I love you!"

Intriguing

The best thing you can do after a breakup is to work on yourself, making yourself a better person. If everything remains exactly the same, then the former partner will not be ready to restore the relationship.

You need to change the way the guy sees you. An intriguing message will help with this.

This type of text shows that you are a better version of the person you once were. That is, you get outside more, exercise, travel, live your best life. This type of woman really captures a man's attention.

Mention something interesting you did or saw recently that reminded you of a funny thing you did with your ex.

These texts will arouse his interest:

Is she a runner now?
When did she become so passionate about fitness? She looks simply amazing...
Did she go on vacation? And with whom? Maybe she was with a guy?

An intriguing message will make a man think about you in a new way, which means it will shake his confidence in his decisions.

Rules of conduct if you want to write to your ex-man

There is nothing surprising in such a manifestation of feelings for a man. But before you rush to save your relationship, follow these rules so that your decision is informed.

Keep your feelings under control.

There is a chance that you do not miss your ex-man, but the memories of him. I want to warn you: old feelings may never return. So before you text him, think again.

Don't give your ex a reason to gloat.

If the former lover ignores the message, the woman may lose her composure. Therefore, before taking the first step, you should take care of your self-esteem. After all, how can a man think: “Since she’s pursuing me, that means I’m a male.” And this may hurt you, which should not be allowed

Give important news at the meeting.

To renew the relationship, a personal meeting cannot be avoided. And general conversations about the weather won't help. In live communication, emotion, smell, facial expressions and body movements are important. Only on a date can a woman understand whether she has a chance to awaken new feelings or whether this was the end.

Let go of the situation for a while.

Do not rush to write to a man after a quarrel. Give him time to cool down and think things over. It is possible that he himself will take a step towards reconciliation. If the breakup was due to the woman’s fault, then it’s worth weighing everything carefully. Perhaps this is something that should have been done a long time ago?

Remember the reason for the separation.

If a woman initiated the breakup, then her desire to talk to him may be a matter of habit. When this happens, then remind yourself more often that there were reasons for the breakup. If a man has put an end to it, then the woman should maintain her self-esteem and not impose herself. Simple messages with the text “How are you?” may look pathetic.

Find out the real reason.

In order for a man to think and want to meet you, it is important to fill his life with other activities. Start doing what you have been putting off for a long time: go to the gym, to a concert, read, draw. In this way, you can fill your life with new colors and completely forget about the man or meet a new one.

Don't compare yourself to others

You don't have to be like everyone else. If everyone around you has been married for a long time, don’t attach much importance to it. Moreover, it is not worth living with a person who is not suitable for you, because “that’s how it should be” and “it’s time to get married.” Better alone than with just anyone. Freedom has its benefits.

Filter your data.

Don't believe rumors. If he wanted to return, he would find a way. Before you write, it’s better to find out the latest news from his life if you don’t want to put yourself in an awkward position. But without fanaticism.

Emphasis on nostalgia

People will always idealize what they no longer have. This is a natural process that will work in your favor after a breakup. If you don’t know what to write to your ex-boyfriend, then remind him of happy times. This powerful tool activates feelings of longing for you.

For example, write the following: “I remember one cool night at the top of our cliff... you kept me warm, holding me in your arms. It was a pleasure."

Farewell words

The right words when breaking up are an opportunity to maintain warm friendly relations with your ex or, conversely, to strike him in order to avenge the pain caused.

The initiator is a girl

You want to break up with your boyfriend because he didn't appreciate you, was inconsiderate, rude, or something else. You want to say something to him goodbye so that he understands that it was his fault that he lost you. In this case, do not create a scandal and do not behave like a hysterical and neurotic person, otherwise he will only feel relief from the breakup. Smile sweetly and tell him one of the following phrases:

Love is like a fire into which you constantly need to add more wood. Lately I've had to do it alone. I'm tired and want to put out the fire. Goodbye.
I fell in love with a smart, kind, attentive and caring man. You were like this before, but you have changed dramatically now. It’s very difficult to love you today, so I’m leaving. I wish you happiness and don’t step into the same rake with the next girl.
You are still dear to me, but I decide to leave, because from two halves we have turned into enemies. I don't understand you, you don't hear me. It's better to end things now than to hate each other later.
I love you, but that doesn't mean I should stop being myself. You wanted to change me and I tried for your sake, but apparently you didn’t like the result. I no longer feel your admiration and love. I choose the real me, and therefore goodbye.
I don't know if you'll notice, but I'm leaving. You are too busy with yourself, and you always don’t have enough time for me. I don’t want to be a burden and vegetate endlessly waiting for your attention. Be happy. Goodbye.

If you want to break off a relationship with a guy because you stopped loving him or met someone else, then you shouldn’t be rude to him. Be extremely polite and apologize for the pain you cause, for example:

You are a good person and deserve honesty. I don't love you anymore. Sorry. I will be glad if we can maintain friendly relations.
When you first kissed me, I thought that I want to spend my life next to you. But I was mistaken, it was not love, but only passion, which faded away over time. This is not your fault, we are just not two halves of a whole, and we have yet to find them. Forgive me for the pain I cause, but please let me go without resentment or hatred.
I'm ending our relationship. It so happened that I met another person and felt that he was that same soulmate. Sorry if you can, but it’s better to tell the truth right away than to lead to betrayal and betrayal.

It is not necessary to “cram” these phrases. It is more correct to say something in your own words and from the heart, preserving the meaning inherent in the examples.

We're friends now

This is an extremely dangerous type of message, so use it with caution. After all, you may end up in the friend zone forever.

For example, send: “Hey... just wanted to say that I'm glad it's over, but I'd be really sorry to lose our friendship.”

This is a good option because the balance of power shifts from the guy to you. Instead of your ex thinking you still want to get back, you say you just want to be friends. This way you can end up having fun with him again... and then re-seduce him!

When is it worth going for reconciliation?

To decide whether to reunite with your lover, you should answer a few questions honestly:

In a disagreement, did the guy insult you harshly or hit you?
Do you often fight in your relationship?
Does your lover abuse alcohol?
Letting a guy talk ignorantly in front of other people with you?
Cheating with someone else?

If the answer to two questions is “Yes,” then you should think wisely about returning the person. Perhaps your love is walking somewhere nearby. In case of negative answers, you should try to correct the situation and return the guy .

Calling out jealousy

Jealousy plays a huge role and often attracts an old love back. Sometimes this is the only way to make a man understand how much he misses his ex-girlfriend.

Many people say that trying to make your ex jealous is an effective strategy. Honestly, this is a very tricky and at the same time very dangerous option that can lead to disaster.

Jealousy should not be used if the ex-boyfriend is insecure, extremely emotional, or jealous.

The message could be: “Hi! Everything was wonderful last night. You looked amazing!”

Keep in mind that you can only send this message after you have already written to your ex in a pleasant manner and feel good mutual understanding between you.

Statuses on social networks are an effective tool

Another tool that will tell a guy more than you yourself is statuses on social networks. Their text may hurt your ex, make him regret the breakup, or tell him that you miss you:

Now I'm finally free and happy.
How good it is to free yourself from the shackles of jealousy and constant discontent.
I’m starting to live with a clean slate – I can breathe easier.
I am considering applicants for the vacant position of a loved one.
Try to make me happy, my ex failed.
I am free like a bird in the sky, I can finally spread my wings.
Looking for inspiration to write a new love story.
Love has passed, the tomatoes have wilted, but this is only for the better.
Everyone has their own limit of patience, mine burst, but I don’t regret it one bit.
There are no irreplaceable people.
“Love was without joy, separation will be without sorrow.” (M. Yu. Lermontov).
Is love evil? No, I'm not a goat to love a goat!
“If you can’t get closer, people move further away.” (Franz Kafka).
I’m ready to forgive and start over, but I can’t say about it, and you won’t guess it yourself.
By the way, yes, by the way, there is your half of the bed here... (Evgenia Rybakova).
Only by parting with a person do you find out who he really is.

On the vastness of the World Wide Web, if you wish, you can find many more short but succinct quotes from famous personalities that will express your feelings better than yourself. Finally, the same advice: love yourself more than anyone, then parting will not be so painful. Goodbye.

Request for advice

As you know, men are creatures who want to help the weaker sex both physically and mentally. For this reason, ask him for advice on some topic that your ex-boyfriend understands. Feeling useful has been shown to relieve feelings of stress in men, and communicating with an ex-girlfriend can be a challenging time.

For example: “Hello! I decided to take up music, but I don’t know which guitar is better to choose. Can you give me some advice?

The ex-boyfriend will feel great at the time of reading, as this is a confirmation of his expertise in this matter. But this option won’t work if you just come up with something that you don’t need at all. If a man catches you in a lie, then the chance will be lost.

What to do before you write

Don’t rush and don’t be led by emotions; before you write something, think about whether it’s really worth doing. After all, you broke up for a reason. Over time, all grievances are forgotten and fade into the background. Remember the shortcomings of your ex, his unworthy behavior. After all, he will not change, and you should not waste your life in a relationship with a person whose behavior does not suit you.

Understand whether you really want reunion or whether this desire is imposed from the outside. Another friend got married, and your mother is terrorizing you with questions about when you’ll be able to go out at your wedding. Don’t pay attention to the comments of others, you deserve the best, and you don’t need to build a relationship with the first candidate you come across. A lonely girl has a much greater chance of finding a soul mate and a truly congenial person.

Or maybe you just got bored and your attempt to renew the relationship was dictated by the desire to diversify your life? Then keep yourself busy, find a hobby. Relationships are built on mutual love, and not to entertain someone.

Messages are not a magic pill.

Of course, SMS and messages on social networks make it possible to establish a connection with your ex, even if it was he who left you. The text gives a huge advantage, because you can:

think about the answer;
discuss things that are difficult to talk about in person.

But don’t expect that after writing just a couple of messages, your ex-boyfriend will immediately be on his knees at your door asking you to take him back. A constant dialogue should be created between you over some time. There is no need to rush in this matter; on the contrary, try to get to know your ex again, as if you had just met.

Progressive movements towards each other will help build contact, and most importantly, understand whether it is worth starting a relationship with your ex after a breakup.

If they leave you...

It is more painful and offensive to find yourself in the role of an abandoned party. The more you want to be collected, proud and desired at the moment of parting. Here are some options that will tell you what to say to a guy when breaking up so that he regrets:

“You deserve a kind, sweet and shy girl. I am completely different, purposeful and strong. Therefore, it is good that our paths diverge. Goodbye!"
“Initially, I was not ready to build a future together with you! But your persistence prevailed... And what came of it?”
“Leave quickly and don’t look back! Everything will be great for you, I wish you happiness!”
“I respect your decision! It really will be better for us separately. Although I am still in love with you..."
“Don’t blame yourself for anything, none of us are perfect. If you want to leave, go, I won’t keep you...”
“Thank you for the time we spent together, but you’re right, we’d be better off apart!”
“You were right when you said that we have little in common. And I kept thinking that opposites attract. It's time to part ways."
“Our love was too ideal to turn into infinity. Thank you for the days spent together"
“I’m sad and hurt not because we’re breaking up. But because you still found a reason to break up. But I still wish you happiness.”

The main thing is to be sincere, but not to show the withering negativity pressing from within. Pleas, threats, accusations will be unnecessary in any case. They won’t keep him and won’t return him, but at the same time they will become a reason to isolate himself from any contacts, or even a topic for jokes among his friends. Pride and self-sufficiency must come to the fore.

Is it possible to get your ex-boyfriend back with a letter?

It is difficult to answer this question in one word: “Yes” or “No”. On the Internet you can find a lot of advice on how to write letters that supposedly can immediately, immediately force your ex-boyfriend to give up everything, forgive everything and fly to you on the wings of love in order to quickly embrace you in his arms and never again. break up.

Dream? Fairy tale? Actually not quite like that. If your relationship has just begun and you broke up because of the first quarrel, then, indeed, it is quite possible to return the guy with just one, but correctly written letter.

But if you have been together for a long time and conflicts between you have accumulated over time, then even the most correct letter will not be able to turn the situation 180 degrees and make everything recover in an instant. But with the help of a letter, you can plant the seed for a real restoration of the relationship.

As you can see, the answer to the question: “Is it possible to get your ex-boyfriend back with a letter?” may sound like: “YES”, “POSSIBLE”, “COMPLETELY LIKELY”, but in no case will it sound like “NO”, and this is the most important thing.

Let me digress a little before I begin. If you are one of those who wants to get a guy back using SMS, I will especially answer one frequently asked question for you, so as not to delay you and not distract you from your search: Is it possible to get a guy back just using a short SMS message? - No you can not. Using SMS you can only scare him by telling him that you are pregnant from him. This is a joke, and don’t even try to “play” with it in practice. Because then you will have to forget forever even about the illusory possibility of restoring normal relations.

How to write, when to write, and what to write?

You should not think that you can “hot on the heels” start writing to your ex-boyfriend everything that is boiling in your soul. First, think about what you want to achieve with the letter - the return of your loved one. This means that your letter should not contain space:

claims;
accusations and reproaches;
grievances;
excuses;
reminders of unpleasant situations;
threats and blackmail;
pleas for return;
requirements for the former partner to change something in his behavior.

In order not to break down and write something that could completely bury your hopes for renewing the relationship, you must calm down and resist the desire to write a letter as soon as possible, while you are still in a state of anguish, grief and sorrow.

Under no circumstances write something like: “We are both to blame for what happened.” The letter should feel and show sincerity in your desire to fix everything and restore relationships without repeating the mistakes of the past. After all, there was a specific reason or group of reasons for the breakup. You can start writing a letter only after you clearly understand these reasons. In this regard, the letter should contain:

a look into a bright future;
understanding your mistakes (only your own!!!) and admitting these mistakes;
desire and confidence not to repeat mistakes in the future;
memories of the most pleasant moments and events of your relationship (without intimate details);
the emptiness and sadness that you experience (but without groans, hysterics and without unnecessary tragedy).

Do not try to evoke self-pity in a letter - this will only harm you and can make restoring the relationship almost impossible. You must be frank and confident that everything you write will be received exactly the way you want, and not in a distorted form. You should also clearly demonstrate that you understand what changes are required on your part to restore the relationship.

Have you been dumped or have you been abandoned, is there a difference in writing a letter?

For the letter that you will write, there is no difference in who exactly initiated the break in relations.

In both the first and second cases, the recommendations are the same. It’s just that if they abandoned you, you made a mistake and provoked a break; if you abandoned you, you also made a mistake because you got excited and made an emotional, rash decision.

Examples of letters

In order for you to have an idea of how to and how not to write letters to your exes, I will give real examples of letters from some of my clients with their permission.

Some of them followed all the recommendations and, as a result, were able to start relationships with their ex-boyfriends again.

Others decided that they knew better what to write, how to write and when to write, or simply failed to keep a “cool head”, so not only did they not restore the relationship, but they were not even able to meet with their ex-boyfriends for a serious conciliatory conversation.

The first letter is almost perfect in terms of getting your ex-boyfriend back. Unfortunately, the girl who wrote this letter did not keep her word and about a year later she broke down, causing a terrible scandal for her beloved, after which they broke up completely.

Despite this, I believe that this letter is one of the best examples because it was written exactly as needed, which achieved immediate results - the guy gave the girl another chance. How she used it is a second question that has nothing to do with the letter itself.

Hello my beloved (boyfriend's name)

I ask you to read this letter to the end, I promise that there is nothing unpleasant for you in it. Just read it, because it won’t be difficult for you and won’t oblige you to anything, but it’s very important for me that you read it. Believe me, everything that is written in this letter was very difficult for me.

From the moment we parted, it’s been empty, bitter and hard for me to realize that now we are no longer together and I can’t touch you, look into your eyes and tell you how much I love you.

I thought a lot about what happened, and I realized how wrong I was for constantly hurting you. I stupidly wanted your undivided attention, not understanding and not taking into account your desires and your feelings, so I behaved like a complete selfish person, although you did everything possible to make me feel good with you.

Now I remember how you came to me every day when I was sick, and sat by my bed for hours even when I was sleeping. Do you remember how you carried me in your arms during the rain so that I wouldn’t get my feet wet? How you and I were sitting on a bench in the park, and you were telling me something about cars. I didn’t understand half of everything you said, but I didn’t need it, I just enjoyed your voice, drowning in it, and died of bliss, feeling your hand on my shoulder.

I so wanted this to last forever, but then I didn’t appreciate the happiness that you give me and wanted even more. And it so happened that my stupidity, inexperience and selfishness took over, so I lost you, with my own hands I destroyed everything good and beautiful that was between us.

(boyfriend's name), my beloved and only one, I ask you, if you can, forgive me. Give me a chance to make things right. I will never allow the bad things that happened between us to happen again. I will beat myself on the wrist, but I will not allow myself to ruin our relationship again and betray your love.

Trust me for the last time, and if I haven’t completely destroyed your feelings for me, please answer me and tell me if I can hope for forgiveness and a chance to start everything from that moment when we felt so good together.

I promise that I will carry this moment throughout my life and will do everything that depends on me so that you always feel good with me.

(boyfriend's name), if you believe me, I will be the happiest person in the world, because I can be with you again, if not, I will be the most unhappy, because I could not appreciate your love, save it, and realized too late that I actually did it.

I will accept any answer from you that you think I deserve and will no longer bother you with letters or calls. Because now for me the greatest happiness is your happiness, even if not with me... although this is very bitter to realize.

Forgive me if you can, my beloved.

Yours (Girl's name).

Now I will give a classic example of incorrect writing. The girl listened to all the recommendations, but did not consider it necessary to adhere to them. As a result, her boyfriend didn’t even answer her. Compare this letter with the previous one, and you will see the difference, and, as a result, completely different results.

Hello (name)

You don’t respond to SMS, calls and don’t consider it necessary for me to respond to messages on FaceBook, so I’m forced to write you a letter.

I just wanted to apologize for what happened between us. I admit part of my guilt for that quarrel, but you also did not behave entirely correctly. Don't understand that I want to blame only you for everything. We are both to blame and let's not figure out who is more and who is less. Both you and I have done a lot of stupid things.

When you said that I treat you badly, and my behavior looks very ugly from the outside, I flared up, but you yourself pushed me to such behavior. Why did you need to remember Sveta in the club then? You knew very well what kind of relationship I had with her. You later apologized, but you can’t take the words back; what’s said is said. I had already lost my temper and had little understanding of what I was doing, but it was out of resentment. I didn't mean to embarrass you in front of your friends, for that I apologize. But didn’t you really understand why I was angry then? Do you know how it hurt me?

(name), the last time we quarreled, I shouldn’t have thrown your gift and run away. I agree that I did something wrong and am ready to apologize for it. But you, too, could not stand there like a statue and bring me back to show that you care, and you just turned around and left. And when I called you to make peace, you said that everything was over between us and didn’t even want to listen to me. Do you think it was nice?

Let us forget all this and try to start all over again, just give each other our word that we will no longer offend or be offended.

I hope that you understand everything and will be with me again, because you and I are very suitable for each other.

(Girl's name)

And now another example of incorrect writing, but its tone is slightly different. The girl who wrote it also decided that she could do everything herself and much better than she was advised. This letter also did not bring results, and the guy did not return.

My Masik, the dearest and most beloved.

I really ask that you forgive me. I can not live without you!!! I feel so bad that I even feel sick, and I don’t sleep at night and only think about how I can beg your forgiveness. Please forgive me, I honestly didn’t want to learn like this and I promise that I will never do it again, I give you my most honest word of honor. After the day when you said you were leaving me, my temperature rose and I couldn’t get out of bed in the morning.

I will wait for you all the time and follow you until you forgive me and tell me again how much you love your bunny.

I will do whatever you want for you, just come back to me and don’t leave me. If you don’t come back, I’ll throw myself out of the window, lie down under a train, drown myself, but I still won’t live without you!!! Are you really going to let me just die like that? Are you really so soulless that you’re ready to push me to certain death? I know that you are the sweetest and kindest, so you simply cannot do this to me.

I love you very much and cannot imagine life without you. Everything I did was only out of love for you. Forgive me, I beg you, don’t let me disappear without you in torment and suffering. You will always be only with me. If you want, I will crawl to you on my knees so that only you can forgive me and this nightmare of mine will end. I don’t believe that just like that, in one day, I suddenly became indifferent to you. I know that you love me and just decided to teach me a lesson, but now I can’t find a place for myself from grief and I pray to you that you forgive me and it all ends and we were together again and you said that you love me and you have me the best.

I saw you walking arm in arm with another girl yesterday. She is not worthy of you, she has short legs and hair a thousand times worse than mine, and she will never love you as much as I do and will not bring you happiness. Leave her, because I can’t even think about you being next to her, hugging, kissing and I don’t know what else, which I’m even afraid to think about. After all, you are only mine, you always told me that I am your only one, so why are you now not fulfilling your promise, leaving me and making me unhappy.

If you feel even the slightest bit sorry for me, I am on my knees asking you to come back to me. Let's all forget the bad things and love each other again, as we did before this unfortunate day. Forgive me, forgive me, forgive me, forgive me!!!!

Your bunny.

Read these letters carefully and learn not to repeat the mistakes.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: My answers in the comments are the opinion of a private individual and not the recommendation of a specialist. I’m trying to answer everyone without exception, but unfortunately I don’t physically have time to study long stories, analyze them, ask questions about them and then answer in detail, and I also don’t have the opportunity to accompany your situations, because this requires a huge amount of free time, and I have very little of it.

In this regard, I kindly ask you to ask specific questions on the topic of the article, and do not expect that I will advise in the comments or accompany your situation.

Of course, you can ignore my request (which many people do), but in this case, be prepared for the fact that I may not answer you. This is not a matter of principle, but solely of time and my physical capabilities. Don't be offended.

If you want to receive qualified help, please seek advice, and I will devote my time and knowledge to you with full dedication.

With respect and hope for understanding, Frederica

SMS to a guy to get him hooked and interested

Young girls in the initial stages of dating are wondering how to increase a guy’s interest.

To do this, you can use phrases that will hook a man and make him feel feelings for you:

“You know, since our last meeting I realized something about you, it turns out that you are not who you say you are.” This message will make him think a lot about you.
"Hello! Did you happen to study at school number..., maybe you are familiar with...? I’ve been looking for him for a long time.” In this way, you will unobtrusively start a dialogue, even if you do not have mutual acquaintances.
“I have a gift for you that will delight you this winter. Would you like to know which one?"
“I urgently need your help! Can you help me choose a dress for the evening? I’ll send you the options now.” This is a rather bold option for girls, but this way you will raise the guy’s self-esteem, because of all other men, it is his opinion that is important to you.
“Can you tell me which gym you go to? You look amazing!". Guys love compliments on their figure.
"Hello! I noticed you yesterday, don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.”

What to write in a message to make a guy feel negative emotions

If you still haven’t mastered the art of barbs over text, our advice will come in handy.

We humiliate with offensive jokes

Coming up with an offensive joke phrase is not so easy. It must meet certain requirements:

If you ridicule any quality of his, you must be truthful. If he is smart, there is no point in making fun of his stupidity.
The most noticeable blow is the one that is applied to sore spots. If you have been in a relationship for a long time, and you know what unpleasant situations he has been in and where he showed himself in an unsightly light, remind him of this and season him with “pepper and salt” so that it burns longer.

If you don’t know what SMS to write to a guy that will touch his heartstrings, you can turn to the ubiquitous Internet for help. The World Wide Web is replete with role models, but your recent admirer may have already heard them. Therefore, we offer you our set of humiliatingly funny phrases:

“The figurine you gave me was completely accidentally broken. Just imagine, I hit the wall myself. So sorry. I can’t give it back to you.”
“After our parting, I tried for a long time to find sadness in myself, or at least a little sadness. For some reason I didn't find it. We must have done something wrong. We must repeat the separation."
“Zhuzha misses you. Such a naive and stupid animal. Today I’ll start re-educating her.”
“Don’t touch my strengths with your shortcomings.”
“Apparently you were last in line when God gave out intelligence and beauty to people.” “You are like a vast ocean, covered with an endless series of waves. I feel sick when I look at you."
“Are you always so stupid or is today a triumph for you?”
“I see you’ve let smart thoughts get into your head?”
“I sympathize with your mirror. Seeing this face several times a day is not an attraction for the faint of heart.”
“Think at least with your bone marrow.”
“Did your parents offer you money when you were a child to run away from home?”
“I advise you to speak out as often as possible. Perhaps constant practice will eventually give you a chance, and you will voice some smart idea.”
“You probably don’t know this, but there are several hairdressers in our city. One of them is around the corner."
“Nature rested well on your face.”
“Have your brains returned from vacation yet?”
“I don’t even know how to explain this to you. After all, I don’t speak the language of stupid people.”

Causing jealousy

Is he worried about the fear of losing you completely and irrevocably? Fuel this destructive feeling with your messages.

“Your friend is really handsome. Can you text me his phone number?” With such a message you will not only cause jealousy, but also hurt his pride.
Ambiguous phrases are also suitable: “You don’t have to worry about me. There is someone to take care of me.” This “someone” can actually be not only a young person, but also parents, relatives, and friends.
Write him a long, beautiful compliment, and then send him a message indicating that you were the wrong recipient.
Send him a photo of a man's shirt and ask if he forgot it at your house? Let him think that you already have someone.

Show your imagination

To show him what a worthy woman he missed, engage in self-praise. At first he may take it ironically. But if you send him compliments infrequently but regularly, this can be an effective way to influence him.

“Today I outdid myself at work. I prepared such a delightful presentation. Everyone listened with their mouths open.”
“I myself am surprised how I manage to look so beautiful in our difficult times. I am attaching a photo report."
“I bought myself a new brand bag. For all bonuses. Unlike some, I can afford it.”

Some time after a strong quarrel, a man begins to feel remorse. Under their influence, he becomes softer and more romantic. Memories messages will be effective here: about first dates, joint holidays and trips, cute trinkets or serious gifts that you exchanged, in general, about everything related to happy days that are a thing of the past. Messages like this would be suitable: “Remember that pretty courtyard where you kissed me for the first time? Snowdrops are blooming there now.” “What were we thinking when we killed our love? We can’t get these feelings back.”

Each couple has their own code words that seem funny and amusing only to them, because they are associated with some kind of embarrassment, an unusual event, which they happened to witness or participate in. Or it could be a song, a poem, even a joke. Write him your secret phrase. Such a move will not leave him 100% indifferent.