For many people, a happy family is one of the most important priorities in life. However, what and how it is built is not written in school textbooks, so newlyweds often face many problems when developing their recipe for an ideal relationship. There are tips from psychologists that are important to apply correctly in relationships with your family and friends.
What is a happy family?
The philosophical concept of happiness is a very vague feeling. In general terms, it can be described as an individual’s internal feeling of the joy of being. From this we can conclude that a happy family is a unit of society in which each individual feels joy from living together than if he existed separately. Many psychologists understand the concept of what a happy family means as a state of love and harmony between all its members.
Basic qualities of a happy family
There is a common saying that all happy families are equally happy, but every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. With this folk wisdom, the ancestors tried to convey to the newlyweds that there are signs of a happy family that are unchanged for every generation. In such a union the following qualities must be present:
- Respect, which is considered the basis of a strong marriage. Not only spouses, but also children of parents and vice versa should respect each other.
- Trust between husband and wife and in relationships with children is also very important. Total control, constant surveillance and checks are a signal of both the ill health of the relationship itself and the psychological problems of one or both partners.
- In a happy family, all its members must have tolerance. This manifests itself in ordinary routine life in one territory, when different people have their own habits, characteristics and habits.
What makes a family happy?
Psychologists understand the concept of family happiness as the successful implementation of the following functions:
- The economic and household
unit, that is, the unit of society, is built on the successful division between all family members of responsibilities for its life support: who earns money and brings food, cooks and cleans. - Reproductive
. Many are convinced that the union of a man and a woman will be incomplete without their continuation in children. - Educational
. That is, the mother and father must take on the responsibilities of raising and raising their own children and educating them. - Recreational
. At home, among loved ones, parents and children should take a break from external worries and problems. - Emotional-spiritual
. In a family, each individual must develop spiritually, exchange emotions and find support and respect. - Sexy
. The key to a strong relationship is harmony in the intimate life of the spouses. - Social
. Happy parents and children can be considered full members of society.
Examples
Glossy magazines and programs often talk about couples whose love could be used as an example .
We must understand that every family is individual. The methods for creating happiness vary from person to person.
One of the best examples is an elderly couple who have lived together for many years, maintaining love and fidelity. They have happy children and grandchildren who come to them on holidays, but do not forget on ordinary days. Such a family can say that “we are together no matter what.”
Happy couples can also be found among celebrities. One of them, Monica Bellucci and Vincent Cassel . They have been together for 15 years and are raising two wonderful children.
Another famous couple, Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith , are one of the strongest couples in Hollywood, they have two children, have been married for 14 years, Will does everything to make his wife feel loved.
Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell have been together for about 30 years. Goldie says the most valuable thing to her is that she feels loved.
Svetlana and Fyodor Bondarchuk have been together for 20 years. After so much time, their feelings have not faded away, and they are not shy about showing them in public.
Angelica Varum and Leonid Agutin. An amazing couple whose love is noticeable from the outside. Despite their bright and temperamental characters, they love and appreciate each other, and preserving the family is important to them.
Family values of a happy family
The main guarantee of happiness in a family is the presence of unshakable and revered values:
- Belonging to one's group
. Every child and parent should know and feel that he is loved and needed by his family. - Reasonable flexibility in relationships
. Rules and boundaries are necessary, but situations in life are different, so it is important to be flexible with loved ones. - Respect or complete acceptance of the feelings
, needs and thoughts of another person, but not to the detriment of one’s own life guidelines. - Honesty
, without which it is impossible to create a long and strong union. Any lie will sooner or later come true and cause a crack in an alliance that lasts years and even decades. - Forgiveness and generosity
. It is important for spouses and their children to be able to forgive each other in minor quarrels, to try to give without asking for anything in return. - Communication and traditions
. Happy are those spouses who always have something to talk about. A successful family is one that has beloved and unchanging traditions. - Responsibility for both your own affairs and actions
, and the life steps of loved ones and relatives.
Harmony, concept and manifestations
Harmony is a state of balance, balance.
In a harmonious family there are practically no quarrels, and if controversial situations arise, they are resolved as efficiently and beneficially as possible for all its members.
In a harmonious family, there is a feeling of calm, integrity, positive emotions are present, and if someone is upset or sick, then close people support, help to get out of emotional negativity or a difficult life situation.
In a family where there is balance, the morning begins positively, in the evening people rush home because loved ones are waiting for them there and need attention and care.
The basis of harmony, calmness and confidence that you are needed, that your loved ones will always support you, give you a smile, and help improve your mood.
Quarrels are unacceptable in such families; they upset the created balance and bring negativity into existence. Harmonious families avoid conflicts as a factor that threatens calm and integrity .
Principles of a happy family according to the Bible
In many religions, a large, happy family is considered the standard of a righteous life. The Bible, like other religious books, contains the basic principles of its construction. These include:
- Choosing a single partner for life. Divorce is not encouraged in Christianity. It is believed that God blesses people for marriage once, although there are exceptions.
- Recognition and respect for each other. The man is considered the head of the family, who is obliged to take care of his wife, and the woman is the mistress of the house.
- Intimate life is the connecting link for spouses. Infidelity and other forms of manifestation of sexual energy outside the marital bed are unacceptable.
- Children born in a legal marriage should be raised in love and understanding. The offspring, who see the honor and respect of their parents, will be able to create their own happy union.
Laws of a happy family
Psychologists have tried to formulate the basic rules of a happy family in the form of laws:
- The Law of Matching
states that people entering into marriage should have similar life values and interests, goals and visions for a joint future. - Law of love
. True feelings do not arise suddenly; they are created by the specific deeds and actions of a man and a woman. - According to the law of communication,
spouses with each other and children are obliged to learn to communicate effectively on specific and abstract topics. They should always have something to talk about. - A certain share of independence for each individual in the union
. Only with personal space and delineated boundaries are people ready to wisely sacrifice their interests for the sake of the common good. - Law of development
, according to which spouses, going through life together, must necessarily develop harmoniously in various areas. This is the only way they can adhere to other laws.
Rules for a happy family for children
In order for children to grow and develop harmoniously, there are certain rules in a happy family:
- A family is a team in which all problems are solved together. There is always a leader in the team, whose final decision is not discussed. Leaders should be adults, not children.
- Each member of a social unit has both his own rights and responsibilities, personal time and space.
- There should be no competition between children about who is better, faster or more beloved. Every child should feel loved for who they are.
- In the evening, it is very important to discuss, for example, at dinner, how your day went. Heartfelt conversations and plans for the future bring us closer together.
- Children recognize lies on an energetic level, so they should never lie.
Support
A happy family is a family in which each member is always ready to come to the aid of another member - no matter what such help may be:
- help in some difficult matter;
- to look after its youngest member or the sick;
- to suggest or advise something;
- warn against some rash step;
- and just be in the role of that very “vest” into which you can always cry.
In general, there cannot be a happy family without comprehensive support.
How to create a happy family?
In many guides by psychologists and spiritual leaders on how to make a family happy, there are some recommendations:
- A man and a woman choose a partner who is close in spirit. Without initial points of contact, it will not be possible to create a strong foundation for a marriage.
- Children are natural extensions of their parents. Such a family: parents plus children is considered complete.
- Much of the harmony depends on the proper organization of everyday life and leisure.
- A dose of humor greatly helps brighten up everyday life and the routine of life together. Anything that doesn’t touch personal boundaries is best turned into a joke.
Secrets of a happy family
Elderly people who have lived together for decades are happy to share with young people their secrets about what kind of family is considered happy. According to them:
- All people in the house should have both their own personal space and a common area where they can gather and spend time together.
- Each individual is simply obliged to have hobbies and hobbies, both individual and those that can be enjoyed by everyone together.
- Parents should work, setting an example for their children, and children should learn to take responsibility for their actions and perform feasible duties.
- In a happy relationship, there are traditions, be it having dinner together, rules for creating New Year's crafts or choosing a summer vacation destination.
Why doesn't everyone manage to create a happy family?
It would seem that the recipe for a happy family is simple, but not all people who get married manage to create a harmonious union. This can happen for a number of reasons:
- The imposed opinion of one spouse on the other. Without flexibility and mutual respect, there will be no harmony in the union of a man and a woman.
- Personal ambition and egocentrism. Where several people live together, a reasonable line must be drawn between personal interests and the family good.
- Mistrust and jealousy. Often such symptoms appear in psychologically immature individuals who need to first work through their inner world, and only then get married.
