Until a few decades ago, girls were taught that their main virtues were modesty and shyness. In the 21st century, these qualities are valued much less. Bright, self-confident women are more likely to achieve success both in their personal lives and in their profession.
How to develop these qualities in yourself that give advantages in society and not become an impudent woman from whom those around you run away? Where is the fine line between a strong personality and a boorish person?
Insolence is a personality trait that allows you to actively and openly speak about your interests and defend your opinion. A daring woman will not hide her eyes and clutch a handkerchief with traces of tears in her hands.
A person with audacity is open and spontaneous, he always directly responds to the requests of other people, and is active in choosing his actions.
Arrogance is expressed in disregard for the feelings of other people. An arrogant person is self-centered, he lacks empathy, and all thoughts and actions are aimed only at satisfying his ego.
Is there a difference between not hurting someone else and not hurting yourself? Of course have. This is the essence of the difference between insolence, based on self-confidence, and insolence, based on the principles of disrespect for other people and disregard for social and moral norms.
An impudent girl will skip the line in any public place. While the daring one will not allow herself to be outdone. An insolent character will not tolerate insults addressed to him; an insolent person will be the first to insult.
The insolent person is indifferent to how others treat him; the pangs of conscience are unknown to him. Up to a certain time, such behavior may bear fruit, but in the end the woman will understand that she is left alone. A worthy person will not be able to put up with rudeness and disdainful attitude for long.
The main quality that will allow you to become successful and happy is self-confidence. It is this personality trait that needs to be developed and strengthened.
Self confidence
If we were talking about a man, then this quality would not be placed in first place among the signs of self-confidence. For a bold and confident woman, understanding external attractiveness is the main feature.
Existing stereotypes impose many characteristics, the possession of which places a girl in the category of beautiful. Any discrepancy with the standard (excess weight, for example) can lower a woman’s self-esteem.
A self-sufficient girl loves herself and considers herself irresistible, regardless of her natural characteristics: with a full figure, short legs, narrow lips. And he loves as a whole, and not in parts. And he will not allow anyone to criticize his external data.
A confident lady can go out without hair and makeup, without hiding her natural face from people. Men do not miss such women and a priori consider them the first beauties.
Strength of Personality
A woman has high self-esteem and an established system of values and principles. Such a person does not try to serve, does not feel reverence for anyone. There is faith in your resources, knowledge and experience.
Ability to negotiate and listen to others
A confident girl calmly perceives any information and analyzes it. If it turns out that the opponent’s point of view is correct, the woman will accept it with gratitude for the experience presented. She will not earn points for herself by belittling another.
Self-sufficiency and responsibility for your life
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Confidence leads to the fact that a woman fully takes responsibility for everything that happens to her. She does not blame her mother, friends or husband for failures and problems. The girl understands that she ended up at this point and in this position thanks to those actions and actions that she herself committed.
The ability to admit a mistake and choose a different direction
You cannot live without falls and failures. A self-sufficient woman knows this. She will analyze her thoughts and actions, find a mistake and correct it. At the same time, such a girl will not engage in self-criticism, realizing that no one is immune from mistakes and the wrong path.
Ability to make quick decisions
A confident girl knows her strengths and weaknesses and the resources available. Therefore, she makes decisions quickly enough, without unnecessary doubts and lengthy hesitations.
Healthy psyche
A rare person is free from fears and complexes that are formed in early childhood and require some work to get rid of them. A self-confident person understands the psychological characteristics of his personality, knows how to accept them, and does not dwell on unpleasant moments.
Audacity second happiness
“Audacity” and “arrogance” are synonyms in Russian. Why does the presence of such a contradictory quality become happiness, and what does it consist of? Arrogance is a character trait that allows you to neglect the feelings of others. As a result, a person’s complete concentration on his own “I” occurs. An arrogant person is an egoist who easily forgets about morality, rules and other high social principles. He hunts for profit and comfort. Why stand in a long line and waste time when you can get ahead? Why wait for a boring monologue to end when it’s easier to interrupt it? Arrogant people are materialistic. They are not inclined to transfer the experiences of another person onto themselves. They don’t care what others think and feel; they don’t think about the consequences. You will say: “As it comes around, so it will respond,” to which they will boldly answer you: “When it responds, then we will think!”
A daring person knows how to forget about moral principles for his own benefit. Why remember the rules of decency and worry about the result, when it is easier to respond to a caustic remark with an even more caustic comment? Do you accommodate your distracted husband by remembering his schedule and reminding him of an important meeting? And the impudent person will leave everything as it is. And there will be no regrets. When you come home tired in the evening, do you struggle to prepare dinner? But the daring lady doesn’t like this option. If the husband wants to eat, then he has three options: cook it himself, order food at home, or, if successful, take his tired nymph to a restaurant to improve her mood.
Arrogance rarely bothers its owner. His views on life are such that the existing model of behavior fits harmoniously into them and does not cause discomfort. The impudent person receives rebuff infrequently, and does not grieve about it for long.
But what about the harm to others? For an arrogant person, this makes no sense, and moral and ethical problems of behavior do not bother him. Having offended a loved one, he does not suffer and does not engage in self-flagellation. Because of this, connections with people quickly fall apart. Few people are able to stay in the life of such a person for a long time. It happens that feelings take over, and insolence becomes punishment, but this does not happen so often, and mainly in books with high moral content.
Openly expressing your opinions and needs
A complex, shy girl with low self-esteem is often afraid to openly say what she thinks or refuse a person. A confident woman expresses her needs and openly says what she considers necessary and defends her point of view.
What to do with the appearance?
First of all, you need to understand that each of us is created by nature, the universe, and any standard is just a model of beauty imposed in a particular society. What was considered charming 100 years ago is today regarded as disgusting.
High self-esteem implies acceptance of yourself in any form. Of course, a woman can see her weaknesses, but does not diminish her self-worth because of them.
An objective analysis will help you understand what needs to be corrected at the moment and take the necessary measures to address it. But even before achieving results, you should love and pamper yourself.
For example, a girl wants to lose extra pounds in the abdominal area and decides to limit herself to fast carbohydrates. But she will not consider herself ugly before she gets the result and suffer from weighing herself every day.
Is it possible for girls to be impudent?
Girls, admit it, how often have you thought about how to become arrogant and self-confident? You thought that this could help win a guy away from a competitor or become a team leader. Well, according to research, it is worth noting that guys really pay attention to arrogant girls. But other studies have already shown that men like to get married and, in principle, start serious relationships with calm ladies, with whom they are always comfortable.
Therefore, if you want to become arrogant and confident, then go for it. But assess all situations sensibly and use these character traits only in the right cases.
Personal care, clothing
Lack of humiliation does not mean that you can neglect the rules of hygiene and basic care procedures. Appearance always matters. “They greet you by their clothes,” remember?
Agree, when there is dirt under your nails and your hair falls like tow on your face, it’s hard to be confident. And people will not perceive such a woman as a strong person. We won’t buy blue chicken in the store with yellow subcutaneous fat.
Clothes for a confident woman are those in which she feels comfortable and appropriate. A girl may love ripped jeans and oversized sweaters, but she understands that for an interview at a large, reputable company, she would be better off wearing pumps and a formal business suit.
Daring girls, as a rule, attract attention with bright accessories, catchy makeup, and a costume with elements of provocation.
Wardrobe change
If you don’t know how to become angrier and bolder, change your wardrobe! A person dressed shabbyly, unkemptly, and at the same time showing manifestations of rudeness to others, emphasizes his own uncertainty, unfulfillment, and complexes. Stylish, and most importantly, clean and neat clothes help you reassess your own capabilities. With a change in appearance, the need to demonstrate negative behavior may also disappear. After all, a confident person is able to enlist the support of others and achieve his goals without thinking about how to become arrogant.
Posture, ability to hold oneself
A confident woman walks calmly, with a straight back, without waving her arms like a soldier on the parade ground. Her whole figure expresses dignity and readiness to stand up for herself.
Slouching is always perceived as humiliation, a desire to hide from others, or as an oppression of worries and problems. Straight shoulders, beautiful posture, and a proudly raised head reveal a confident and daring woman.
Shyness is emphasized by clasped hands, a downcast gaze, as well as the habit of scratching the nose, ears or fiddling with hair. Try to look your interlocutor in the eyes and keep your palms in front of you.
A confident girl always reflects inner harmony and calm. The best expression of these qualities is a friendly smile. Daring girls do not walk around with a frown and an expression of universal sorrow on their faces.
Is it possible to cultivate anger for your own benefit?
Excessive anger is the presence of negative emotions. Therefore, when trying to change your character, you need to do it in such a way that you begin to feel better.
How to become angry and cruel ? If you want to dramatically change your character, pay attention to the following tips:
- Understand the main rule - you don’t owe anyone anything , just like other people don’t owe you anything.
- Do what you want . Forget about the opinions of others.
- Stop answering yes . This fact will be very surprising to those around you, because before you have always helped them. Perhaps someone will be offended. But you take this with cold indifference - you have your own affairs and problems, and you must take care of them first.
- Develop self -confidence .
- You are a unique, inimitable person , no one has the right to influence your opinion.
- Learn to defend your opinion . Speech must be confident, with clear pronunciation of words. Say what you think, don’t be afraid to express your opinion, arguing that the person will be offended. You are not responsible for other people's emotions, and you can say what you think. Please note that sometimes this leads to conflicts; be prepared for such a turn of events.
How to become angry and aggressive ? For a man, anger is more necessary than for the fair sex.
Ability to assert personal boundaries
You should not allow any kind of aggression or disrespect to be shown towards you. You should immediately stop attempts to cross the boundaries beyond which there is personal space.
There is no need to be rude in response to rudeness; you should calmly explain that you will not tolerate such an attitude towards yourself and why.
A self-confident person knows how to refuse, to say “no” if a request contradicts his interests or basic life principles. There is no need to be afraid of seeming like a “bad” girl, only you can decide what actions you are ready to take.
Remember your goals
Direct all your energy towards achieving your goals. If you really want something, do whatever it takes to achieve it. A great desire should help you put aside modesty in order to receive some benefits.
It is important that your values are true, otherwise motivation will not be enough.
Take advantage of every opportunity to get closer to completing your goals. Be determined and take action if life gives you a chance. Otherwise, someone else will take your place, and the benefits that you deserve with your skills and labor will be taken by a more enterprising person.
What psychologists say
- Most often, self-doubt can go back to childhood. Perhaps, in your youth or junior school years, someone instilled this quality in you - teachers, peers, or even relatives. It is important to realize that you are now an adult, and all those situations are in the past.
- It is much worse if there are people in your life now who develop certain complexes in you. You need to avoid communicating with such individuals in every possible way, and if possible, completely exclude contact with them (unless we are talking about a family member).
- Try to communicate more often with those who inspire you with confidence and belief in yourself. Notice which people your mood rises in the company of, and initiate contact with them more often.
- Pamper yourself more often and give yourself gifts. Very often, self-doubt begins with appearance, and it is in your power to improve it. Go to the salon for new beauty treatments and massages. Pay attention to your hair, take care of your skin.
- Surround yourself with good quality things. It is better to buy things less often, but more expensive. You should feel confident in your clothes - no wear, untidiness, or out of date size. Things should boost your self-esteem, not make you feel embarrassed or uncomfortable.
- Discover new horizons for yourself - take up interesting hobbies, travel to other countries or cities. If you constantly develop in any direction, then your self-esteem will inevitably grow.
- Learn to express your thoughts clearly and confidently. Practice in front of a camera or mirror, observing how you look from the outside. A camera is sometimes even more useful; you will not be able to control yourself as much as in front of a mirror, and you will be able to understand how others see you.
- A person who is insecure is often betrayed by his posture and gait. If you understand that you also have problems with this, but you should work hard on these points. Constantly monitor your posture until it becomes a habit. Have someone film you walking. Study it, and when you see any shortcomings, try to correct it until you bring it to perfection. Don’t forget to look straight ahead when walking, not at your feet. Your movements should be calm, smooth and confident.
- Try to start out looking like a confident girl, and over time you will become one.
Look problems in the eye
Don't try to avoid difficulties by running away or pretending they don't exist. The ability to “face” reality will help you make practical decisions that will ultimately lead to positive change. If you bury your head in the sand, problems will only accumulate. Resist the temptation to ignore problems by indulging in escapist behavior. Drinking alcohol, sitting in front of TV in the evenings, sleepless nights on the Internet, gambling and other similar forms of destructive behavior will distort the view of reality.
Wit
It is important to be arrogant, but to be able to avoid conflict situations. Let's say you decide to achieve a managerial position at work. You behave arrogantly and cunningly. Other colleagues will probably pester you with negative phrases. If you are witty and can answer correctly, your relationship with other employees will not deteriorate. It is important not to offend others, but at the same time continue to move towards your goals.
To develop your wit, start reading, traveling, making more friends, find yourself a hobby.
Don't be self-righteous after making mistakes
Mistakes are an inevitable part of life. Tough people use their mistakes as tools to learn how to succeed next time. If you tend to let mistakes get the better of you, or worse, blame someone else for your own mistakes, then you have the wrong attitude towards failure. Try to approach your mistakes differently. Learn to acknowledge them (first of all to yourself). It is a misconception that in order to be tough you must act as if you are always right. In fact, the opposite is true: tough people are willing to admit their mistakes so that they can then correct them.
Movies
For those who lack bitchiness, we can recommend watching films that can be considered training for real women. Their heroines will show and teach how to behave correctly in any life situations, and in particular, with men.
"The Devil Wears Prada"
A young university graduate, Andrea, manages to get the position of personal assistant to the editor-in-chief of a famous fashion magazine. Miranda is not an ordinary boss. This is the devil himself, who wears a skirt and walks in heels. She does not consider it necessary to explain anything to anyone, repeat things a second time, or forgive mistakes.
In what situations will it help : You have finally received a promotion, but there is no joy - your subordinates seem like lions that need to be entered into a cage. Look at Miranda - take her example. Even if you haven’t received a promotion yet, but you think you deserve it, do the same. Pay attention to the episode where it is shown how you can destroy your competitor.
"Temptation"
The acquaintance of the wealthy Cuban businessman Luis Antonio Vargas with the American girl Julia ends unexpectedly. With her heartfelt letters, she manages to arouse in a man a burning desire to take her as his wife. They are getting married. The wife is incredibly beautiful, charming and sweet. Only in fact, this is not the real Julia, but a swindler who decided to rip off Louis. But he no longer cares who she is. Vargas is so attached that he is ready to do anything to get her back and not his stolen millions.
In what situations will it help: When the situation requires you to be a cute cat before doing something nasty. The cat may then be stroked on the back or scratched behind the ear for this.
"The basic Instinct"
The plot of the film is known to many; there is no point in retelling it. It is only worth noting that for more than 25 years the heroine Catherine Tramell, played by actress Sharon Stone, remains the standard of a bitch in the history of cinema.
In what situations will it help: You don’t have to pay attention to the plot at all. Just look at the heroine and learn how to awaken male instincts. Repeat after Katherine: movements, words, intonation. Remember her game. Just to avoid an awkward situation, you should not repeat the scene with crossing your legs over your legs.
"Connection"
When they meet, passion flares up between the two girls. One of them is Violet, the pretty mistress of a local mafioso. The other is Corky, a newly released prisoner who has been hired to do renovations in the apartment next door. They plan a theft and escape from Violet's lover. Only the man began to suspect something and came to the decision to deal with the girl. Moreover, in a way that is accepted in mafia circles.
In what situations will it help: When a woman considers herself too weak to engage in open battle with a man. You can invite a friend to watch. She will need it too. Just be careful, it's hot in places!
"Bride Wars"
Emma and Liv's friendship began in childhood. They shared everything equally. But the active and punchy Liv easily managed to push Emma around, with her soft and pliable character. Grown up girls one day become brides. As fate would have it, the wedding dates they chose and the location of the celebration coincided. They do not want to give in to each other; they both consider themselves to be right. And they go on the warpath...
In what situations will it help: When you have a sworn friend whom you’ve been itching to take revenge on for a long time. Watch the movie, find out how this can be done. Just don’t forget that this is a movie. Life may turn out differently. If, thanks to your machinations, your friend gets better, you shouldn’t expect a happy ending.
