What to talk about with a friend - simple tips and topics for conversation

Topics for conversation with a friend

Girls need girlfriends for many reasons. You can chat with them about women's topics, go shopping, find support, motivation, etc. Communication with a new, best, school friend, a young mother or an interlocutor who has another company is different. What topics to choose in each case?

With a new friend

If you have only recently become friends, then it is much more difficult to find topics of conversation that are interesting for both of you. First you need to find out what preferences your new girlfriend has. After this, you will be able to navigate the topics.

What questions should you ask first?

1. What are the parents' names?
2. Are there any sisters and brothers?
3. What genre of music do you prefer?
4. What kind of movie do you like to watch?
5. What cafes do you go to?
6. What animals are there at home?

Usually, discussing pets is a good start to communication with a new friend. If you love wildlife, you will easily find a common language with your interlocutor, regardless of which animal she prefers.

Show respect to your interlocutor and do not discuss with your new friend issues that interest only you. Otherwise, you can forget about continuing communication. Remember, people love to talk about themselves. So try to ask more questions. When you ask something, choose questions so that they do not have a monosyllabic answer. Examples of open questions:

1. What is your favorite time of year and why?
2. What subjects did you study at university?
3. What do you do in your free time?

By talking about yourself in more detail, your new friend will feel sincere interest from you. This will strengthen the budding friendships. When choosing a topic, it is important to monitor the reaction of the interlocutor. If she evokes negative emotions in her friend, then you need to smoothly move on to another direction of the conversation.

With my best friend

You only need to take away the good and bright from communicating with your best friend. Talk about light, beautiful and interesting. Forget about topics related to financial and family problems. Options for conversation topics:

1. Face and body care.
2. Dish recipes.
3. Creativity, handicrafts.
4. Growing flowers.
5. Any new interests and hobbies (dancing, fitness, etc.)

Give your friend sincere compliments, even for small things. Don't see her as competition. The exchange of positive energy has a beneficial effect on feminine strength.

With a friend I haven't seen for a long time

Once you were good friends, but then you got a job, got married, gave birth to children and gradually the communication stopped... But now you and your old friend are corresponding again, calling each other or running into each other on the street and making an appointment. What can you talk to her about in this case?

• Typical women's themes. They are interesting to all girls. Shopping, fashion, flowers, children, housekeeping... Among this variety, it is not difficult to find a topic that will captivate both of you.
• Memories. This topic will be more relevant for you, because it can be difficult to start a conversation right away. A common past unites you. You will begin to discuss the time when you studied at school or college, and in the process you will definitely find several topics to talk about.
• News. If you know information about the latest events in the world, then perhaps your friend knows them too. Then it will be interesting to exchange opinions about some news.

With a friend from another company

If you and your friend have different social circles, then most likely you will talk on walks alone or on social networks. Examples of conversation topics in this case are:

1. Movie.
2. Fashion industry.
3. Sport.
4. Change of image of one of the friends.

In addition, you can come up with an interesting commentary on the situation. Look around and you will definitely notice something interesting. Examples:

1. This room is absolutely amazing!
2. I love this party!
3. The view from here is impressive!

You will achieve the best effect if you combine the phrase with an open question. For example: “I like your bag. Where did you buy it? Your friend will probably be happy to tell you all the details of the purchase.

With a married friend and a young mother

There are factors that can alienate a friend, and one of them is marriage. The reason for this is a change of interests and a rare appearance in the general company. If she has a child, the problem of communication becomes even more acute. A young mother has very little free time.

You need to understand that a friend is a close person. She is now in a period in her life when she is completely absorbed in family troubles. She will be far from social events and will begin to talk about what is especially dear to her now - about her baby. It is possible that your friend will not feel the boundaries, but it is important for her that you listen to her. Who, if not your friend, should you tell about the changes that have happened in your life?

The conversation can take place over the phone, on social networks or in real life, but be patient and forget about selfishness. Listen to the new mother, and then gradually begin to direct the conversation to old topics that were close to you before the new period in her life. Yes, she has less time, but her attitude towards you has not changed. Consequently, topics for conversation will arise quickly.

You can become an assistant for your friend who will bring her up to date with the latest events. In the future, she will be grateful to you for not letting her fall out of social life. You can tell her the news every day:

• about acquaintances;
• about the latest in the world of music and cinema;
• about fashion trends, etc.

We advise you to read: Personal boundaries of a person in relationships with other people

What philosophical topics to come up with?

If you frequently correspond with a girl on VK, you need to choose a topic for communication in advance.

To interest her, you can come up with philosophical or general topics that can attract the attention of your interlocutor.

It is worth noting! During a conversation on VK, the interlocutors do not see each other’s faces, so the conversation can start easier.

But it’s still important to come up with an interesting topic that will arouse increased interest in a person and kindle his desire for further communication.

Below in the table there is a list of the best topics for guys and men that are used to talk with the fairer sex:

Don’t forget to find out how she feels about going to the movies; if the opportunity arises, invite her to the cinema.

Proposing a topic for conversation to a girl is not so difficult, the main thing is to choose the right one.

You can find out how to find her from the article. To do this, you should study the interests and hobbies of your interlocutor in advance, this will help start a relaxed and interesting conversation.

You should not ask obscene and repulsive questions that can forever discourage a girl from further communication.

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What to chat about by correspondence

90% of communication with friends takes place on social networks. This could be VKontakte, Odnoklassniki, Instagram, etc. Here you can discuss any news, as well as exchange music, photographs and pictures. During the holidays, you have the opportunity to give your friend virtual gifts and cards. Otherwise, you can communicate with your penfriend on the same topics that you would talk about over the phone or in a meeting.

Social networks can become the main way to communicate with a friend if she or you move out of town. Messages arrive instantly, and, most importantly, they are free. Therefore, you can share news and communicate with your friend for an unlimited amount of time. If it seems that all the topics of what to talk about with a friend on VK have dried up, then you can discuss some post on the network.

On the first date

A first date is an exciting event, because it is during a live dialogue that a person decides whether to continue communication. Relationships can end before they even begin. A first date is like walking through a minefield. Any careless phrase, vulgarity or joke can ruin the atmosphere and create awkwardness in the conversation.

It is better to start a conversation from afar, and it is better to move on to more personal topics gradually. No one will bare their soul to a stranger, so do not try to extract information from him using pincers.

Topics for conversation with a guy:

The last minutes before parting will tell you whether the date went well or not. If a guy without vulgarities expresses a desire to kiss you, it means he is interested in you. All that remains is to prepare topics for conversation on the second date.

What to talk about with a friend after a quarrel: how to improve friendship?

It happens that you quarreled with a friend, you want to continue the friendship, but you don’t know what to talk about. First of all, you need to maintain an attitude as if nothing happened and not dwell on old grudges.

To start a conversation, you can choose one of three ways:

1. Write a greeting via SMS or social networks.
2. Come up with a reason to call and dial her number. For example, ask her for the recipe for the delicious salad she treated you to last time we met.
3. Visit her with some goodies if you know that she is definitely at home. Call ahead and let her know. Tell her you want to share the news with her.

So, you've taken a step forward. To overcome the awkward feeling that will probably arise at the beginning of a conversation, you can choose what topic to talk about with your friend from one of the topics suggested below:

1. Praise some detail from your friend’s appearance: hairstyle, clothes, manicure, etc.
2. Ask about her progress in her hobbies or at work.
3. Ask about her child's development.
4. Reminisce and discuss a positive moment from your friendship.
5. Voice a trick that always amuses you and your friend.

It may not be possible to regain your friend’s affection right away, but at least you will take the first step. To avoid adding fuel to the fire, avoid the following topics:

1. Discussion of the subject of the quarrel.
2. Don't impose your opinion.
3. Don't talk about her partner's shortcomings.
4. Gossip.
5. Any topics that cause negative emotions in a friend.

We advise you to read: How to cheer up yourself and others

Remember, if you don’t want to lose your friend, then don’t repeat past mistakes.

And 10 more tips

1. Friendship with a friend should be mutually beneficial. Both should receive positive emotions. That is, it is not enough to just be and receive, you need to actively give. Be the first to initiate a meeting, plan communication, choose topics, give compliments and gifts.
2. Be attentive to your friend. Be interested in her life, worries, problems. And listen for the answer. If a friend is sad, chatting about fashion and the weather is simply inappropriate. Be supportive first, then have fun.
3. When talking about men, try to avoid negative characteristics. The purpose of communication is to replenish feminine energy. Negativity will not help with this.
4. It is advisable not to gossip. Even if there are no more topics to talk about. Gossip can gradually destroy your friendship, she will subconsciously distance herself from you: you never know what you say about her behind her back!
5. Don't speak badly about your husband. No matter what he did. This is your family and your family happiness, you can’t wash dirty linen in public: why should others know that not everything is perfect with you. This will only attract more negativity into your life. A friend’s “kind” advice can increase your dissatisfaction and add fuel to the fire. Take care of your family.
6. Don't allow your friend to say nasty things about your husband either. By doing this you undermine the foundations of your respect and love for him.
7. Try not to bring up topics on which you and your friend have opposing views. You can express your opinion. But you are friends, not politicians on a talk show. There is no need to prove anything. Everyone has the right to their opinion.
8. Avoid the topic of health (unless you are both doctors). There is nothing pleasant in talking about sores, and random advice can only do harm.
9. It is also better not to touch on topics of money, politics and religion. They are often problematic or controversial.
10. Try to communicate neutrally with your friend’s husband: there wasn’t enough jealousy.

If, despite attempts, you and your friend do not enjoy communication, she does not make contact, then do not insist: let go. Friendship should be mutual.

At the beginning of communication

It all starts with the first meeting. This is where you need to make a positive impression. You shouldn’t be too puffed up and “go out of your way” - it will be very noticeable. You need to try to be a little better than the guy actually is - to the extent that it looks quite natural. It is clear that the man is trying to leave a positive mark on the souls of his girlfriends (and this proves that their opinion is not indifferent to him), but at the same time the guy preserves his “I”. You should not deceive or pretend , the young man must demonstrate charm and ease of communication. Jokes, funny stories from life, favorite anecdotes (without vulgarity) can be used, but no liberties should be taken towards the girlfriends.

It is necessary to maintain a balance of attention. Girlfriends should note that the first place for a guy is his girlfriend, they themselves are also important, but like the cut of his diamond. Although this does not mean that you need to vigorously show your love in front of everyone and kiss passionately - such behavior will look like a provocation for your friends.

Do it once:

1. The purpose of communication is what do you want to achieve from your friend? Really get to know her better, show yourself in all your glory, seduce her today, leave a pleasant impression for a long-term relationship, and so on. The more specific you set your goal (……link to dreams), the easier it will be for you.
2. It doesn't matter what you say, it matters HOW. Facial expressions, voice timbre, intonation. It is important to reach her subconscious. Where she cannot resist you internally. There will be a separate conversation about this. This point simply cannot be thrown away now.
3. Be relaxed and playfully build a conversation. Make it easy for your companion to be with you.
4. You need to give her emotions. Don’t be loaded with terms and technical parts, talk about your feelings or those of other people in a certain situation, this works well on women.
5. Be flexible in your communication. Catch the feedback, you see that it is turning sour, change the topic, introduce mainly non-verbals.
6. The logic of the narrative in words is not as important as the feelings that you put into them. Even if she says: “You are so inconsistent,” you can always answer: “I’m taking a break from the whole world with you, you know how to turn off the part of the brain in men that is responsible for logic. Tell me how you do it?!” All! The ball is in her court ;). Follow her.

You've lost contact

Solution: forgive and forget.

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Didn't get to see your friends as much as you'd like? Give them a little break. All experts agree that now is not the time to hold a grudge. “We're all under extreme pressure, so be forgiving if a friend suddenly gets in touch after being silent for a long time,” says life coach Carol Anne Rice. “Remember, each of us has our own problems too.”

How to become a good communicator

In conclusion, here are a number of generally accepted rules of communication:

1. If the interlocutor is speaking, do not interrupt with questions, let him finish his thought. Perhaps you have found a topic that is interesting to a person and new subjects for discussion will naturally arise from it. The conversation should not be forced. The key to good dialogue is ease.
2. Call your interlocutor by name. This helps to establish trust and sympathy.
3. You should not use obscene language, slang expressions, or filler words in a company with unfamiliar people.
4. Show respect even if you disagree with something said.
5. Keep your distance. Not all people like it when someone breaks into their personal space.
6. Don't get distracted while talking on your smartphone. This is not appropriate.

I also recommend that you read our other publications:

• How to develop interpersonal skills
• How to learn to speak beautifully
• How to keep a conversation going
• How to develop effective communication
• The best public speaking courses

Provocations

In the event that a girl’s friends are one more beautiful than the other, the guy should be wary of provocative behavior. It should be expected for two reasons. A well-wisher friend can - from the motive of “wanting what is best” - simply test a young man for loyalty in order to reveal the truth: unfaithful and deceitful or loyal and persistent. Or another option - the guy will become a victim of open, but secret flirting for his girlfriend. The purpose of flirting can be different: to prove that “I am better”; quarrel between a couple in love and regain the attention of a friend; beat off the guy you like; sporting interest (flirting for the sake of flirting).

Break the ice

Want to get in touch but feel like you have nothing to say? "The ideal solution is to send a photo of you together and say, 'Remember when we did this?' or even just “I miss you,” says Sarah Louise. “If you tell a friend how you feel, you will feel better too.”

Try not to lose optimism. Your mood will influence your friends. Make someone feel happier after spending time with you. “Remind yourself and your friend the reason you're friends,” says Lydia. “But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t listen to your friend’s feelings.” Listen with empathy and provide an opportunity to share.”