What to write to a guy in 2021

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In the article What to write to a guy, we will tell you in detail about what and how to write in order to interest the guy you like. We'll give you the 100 best phrases for dating and 20 useful tips!

All tips were collected and prepared by specialists from the free dating site Free-Russian-Dating.NET , who analyzed millions of requests and messages to derive that very ideal formula.

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Preparatory work: before you write

Dear ladies, many of you want to find your beloved man. This is probably why you surf the expanses of numerous dating sites . But stop! Before you go on a virtual search, work on your profile. It is she who plays a decisive role when meeting a new man. A personal page should reveal the best sides of its owner and imperceptibly veil the shortcomings.

Make your profile bright and exciting, but don't forget to add a touch of mystery.

We've put our profile in order, now we're going to look for the guy. Study carefully every detail of your chosen one. After all, every profile on a dating site is a whole story about its owner. But what is the relationship between the questionnaire and correspondence? The most direct one. Thinking about what to write to a guy in the first message? Forget about the banal “Hello, handsome”! Use the information from the questionnaire and focus on his hobbies.

What to write to a guy

Asking the right questions to a man

At the beginning of dating, it is better to avoid questions about relationships, sexual preferences, and eroticism. Try to talk about general topics, don’t be shy and be the first to ask questions:

What is the most pleasant and memorable gift you have ever been given?
What outstanding personality have you ever met in person?
Do you believe in horoscopes and predictions for the future?
What qualities do you value most in the people around you?
Do you have a lot of friends?
Did you get the education you wanted?
Did you like doing chemical experiments at school?
How do you prefer to spend your weekend?
Do you watch sports matches on TV?
What day of the week is happier or more productive for you?

What to write to the guy you like: set goals

The applicant has been selected, the field for writing messages is open. A hundred thoughts flashed through my head about what to write to the guy. But ask yourself, what is your goal? After all, only a clearly formulated goal can become a guiding star to your cherished dream. Unfortunately, without this it is difficult to achieve success in any business, and even more so on the love front.

Therefore, everything must be clear! I went to a dating site, so honestly answer the question: what do I expect from this communication? Do I need a guy to fulfill my erotic fantasies or to take on the role of a wife? Or maybe you just need a friend to correspond with?

Why it’s important to write first: the benefits of initiative

Let's leave behind the stereotypes that writing to a guy first is bad form. No! Women's pride and inaction can play a cruel joke on you. Read and remember the advantages of the first step on the part of a girl:

An enterprising lady is a rarity, and any uniqueness arouses increased interest.
You can choose from all the candidates presented, and not just from the “what was left after others” category.
The ability to achieve one’s own is developed, and not to wait. Believe me, this skill will be useful not only on dating sites, but also in real life.

What to write to a guy first: simple ways to impress

Let's start the correspondence... Chaotic thoughts arise in your head about what to write to the guy? After all, every message should be a small step to the heart of the chosen one. Agree, it’s hardly possible to catch a man’s attention with the usual phrase “Hello, let’s meet?” Even if it comes from the lips of the most charming lady. Let's add a touch of creativity and positivity.

But how to win his attention from the first lines? Girls, don't worry! A proven technique will come to the rescue - a compliment. And don’t think that only women love with their ears. Believe me, a man’s pride will also not refuse a couple of laudatory speeches addressed to him.

What to write to a guy first

The Power of a Compliment

Of course, it’s surprising that girls on dating sites so rarely praise their interlocutor. After all, a compliment has an unprecedented power of seduction. Even if these are flattering words. The main thing is to express them in a light and relevant manner. Forget about eloquent and long speeches. We also hide banal memorized quotes and epithets in the depths of our memory.

Let's remember that a man by nature is a leader and a conqueror. Therefore, we extol his strength, sexuality and masculinity. Do you think what to write to a guy in this case? Let’s turn on the fantasy: “I’m ready to look at your biceps endlessly,” “I’ve never seen such a sweet smile on a man,” “They say that a handsome guy is an ideal conversationalist. Is this true?”, “Can there really be so much tenderness and romance in such a brutal man? You simply charm".

But any compliment should be kept in moderation. We only praise what really exists. It would be absurd to praise the biceps of a thin man. A compliment should leave a pleasant aftertaste.

Common denominator

We all remember the school curriculum, how easily the equation was solved when brought under one denominator. Maybe we can solve the relationship formula in the same way? As soon as common interests are found, the dialogue will take on a relaxed and exciting character.

Ask what to write to a guy? For example, “Hi! I look at your photos, you visit Baikal so often. I also dream of going there. Share your impressions. Tell me how best to get there?” Or “You have such a beautiful dog. What breed is this? I’m just thinking about getting a four-legged friend!”

Life hack from a psychologist

We discussed what to write to a guy in the first message. The dialogue needs to continue. It is important to become an ideal interlocutor for your chosen one, not only in virtual communication, but also in real life. Now get advice from a family psychologist.

Any conversation can be started and continued naturally with interesting questions . A man's imagination will not have to strain and invent topics of conversation. The conversation will take on a relaxed character. In addition, the question form will stroke men's pride. After all, they are so interested in his person.

How to communicate with a girl by correspondence

And now I will share with you the principles that should be observed when corresponding with a girl. They are quite simple, but important!

1. Don’t write more text (in terms of volume) than the girl does.

I recently re-read my correspondence and in almost all of them the girl writes more text in volume, unlike me. I do this unconsciously. Why is this so important?

The fact is that when you write a lot of text, and in response you get “ok”, and then continue to write again, then your value in her eyes decreases. You begin to invest disproportionately in communication. You also shouldn’t go to the other extreme, when a girl writes to you in detail, and you answer her briefly and in the cold. This will cause the girl to turn on the cold in response.

Therefore the recommendation is:

Write the same volume of messages as the girl does. Just a mirror of her. Of course, you don’t need to count the number of words, the main thing here is to understand the principle. When a girl responds to your message with three words, don’t write her a poem. Answer her also briefly, but with a provocative response.

2. If a girl answered after a long time, do not answer her right away.

If a girl responds after an hour, and you write her back a minute later, then this lowers your value. Ideally, make sure that the girl waits for an answer from you even longer than you did. But this principle does not apply to the situation when you communicate online and write to each other immediately.

Over time, I got into the habit of not being distracted by messages, and I go about my business. Therefore, I answer SMS once or twice a day. And the girls are waiting more for an answer from me, because... I rarely text.

Conclusion: if they don’t respond to your message for a long time, just mind your own business and take a break from correspondence.

3. Don’t charge for a long answer

Many guys start to get angry if a girl doesn’t answer them for a long time. They start writing something like: “Why are you ignoring me?” or “Aww, where are you?” As soon as a girl reads such a message, she will immediately lose the desire to communicate with you. The most I write if they don’t answer me for more than a day is “Are you alive?”

Usually girls respond to this message (Are you alive?), and I start the dialogue from scratch. Those. After her answer, it is very important not to touch upon the topic of being ignored on her part.

4. No sad emoticons or complaints

Never send sad emoticons to a girl (and fewer emoticons in general) and don’t complain about life. Your mood is always high and things are going great. She is not interested in your problems and talking about them will only push her away.

5. Ask open-ended questions

It’s best not to ask closed questions (those that can be answered “yes” or “no”). Let your questions to the girl be open (which require a detailed answer)

Have you been to Turkey? — Closed question (The girl can answer “yes” or “no” and you will have to come up with the question again) What were the coolest moments in Turkey? — An open question to which you will be given a detailed answer and you will be able to develop the topic of conversation.

Phrases for meeting a guy on the Internet: TOP 100

We continue to praise women's initiative. You shouldn't sit still, you need to act. Take the first step towards your happiness. Are you still shy? Don't know what to write to a guy? The main thing is not to cross the line between flirting and vulgar behavior.

Phrases for meeting a guy on the Internet

Family psychologists recommend using a list of unusual questions. Read, choose the appropriate option. After all, these are real lifesavers for interesting correspondence with a guy:

I'm conducting a survey among attractive men on this dating site. Can you answer a couple of questions? If you agree, the first one is - do you like it when girls meet first?
Just imagine, you need to use 20 muscles to smile. Let's train them together? Let's give each other joy and good mood. How do you like this proposal?
I'm choosing a watch for my brother as a gift. I would be very grateful if you could help me with advice. After all, judging by the photographs, you have excellent taste.
You have such cool shirts! Tell me, which ones are in fashion now? I want to give my older brother a gift. Need advice from a stylish man.
120 beats per minute! This is the speed of my heart when I looked at your photo. Will you send me a couple more pictures?
I recently had a wonderful dream. A handsome man rode up to me on a white horse. It seems to me that this guy is very similar to you. Admit it, was it you?
Help with advice! How to check the oil level in a car?
I can't cope without your advice! The computer freezes constantly. What could it be?
How do you feel about virtual dating? Do you believe that the Internet will give you a serious relationship?
What is such a handsome guy doing on a dating site? Probably just tired of fans in real life?
Today I read that handsome guys are always ready to carry on a conversation. I want to test this in practice. Can you help?
You look like a graceful and freedom-loving animal. Can I try to tame you?
Please advise what I can write to the guy who won my heart?
Why are you sad in the photos? Smile. After all, life is wonderful. Do you want me to prove this to you?
The evening promises to be boring. I want to brighten it up with an interesting film. Tell me what to see? Such a nice guy won't give bad advice.
You look like a very competent and erudite person. Recommend what to read in your spare time?
Wow! Do you also like to walk in this park? I think we have a lot in common.
Your photos are filled with emotions and joy. How do you do it?
Your eyes captivated me. This is the first time I have seen a man with such a penetrating gaze. Have you ever been told about this?
Your eyes are shrouded in mystery. Tell me a secret, what are you thinking about?
Before I met you, I didn't believe in alpha males. Do you really exist?
Your look is like a warm blanket, hugging and warming. I'm cold. Will you give me a piece of warmth?
Your eyes captivated me. What difference does it make where you live and how much you earn? Do you believe in love at first sight?
You look very stylish. Are you passionate about fashion or is it an innate sense of taste?
Have I really found you? I've been looking for such a nice guy for so long. Let's get acquainted?
I accidentally saw your photo. One thought haunts me...
You remind me of some actor. Can you tell me who?
Hi handsome! Probably, many girls dream of walking with you to the registry office?
Be my personal consultant! How to win the heart of one attractive guy on this dating site?
Help me solve the dilemma. What is most important in a girl - intelligence or beauty?
Can you imagine, the resorts of the Krasnodar Territory are closed for quarantine. It is unknown when they will open. Is it really a shame? By the way, do you love the sea?
They say that nice guys believe in love at first sight. So I decided to ask the handsome guy. This is true?
I haven’t met such romantic guys for a long time. Oh, and your beloved will be lucky. Tell us about your most unforgettable date.
Do you trust your intuition? Or are you used to being guided by logic?
What movie are you willing to watch over and over again? I’m ready to support your choice and spend the evening with this film. Then we will definitely discuss the plot.
You made an indelible impression on me. You probably hear this often from girls?
What a handsome guy is visiting this dating site. Can I join the ranks of your fans?
I want to have a party. Can you tell me what topic to choose? It seems to me that you know how to relax beautifully.
A real man knows a lot about technology. Help me choose a new phone.
Do you think true love exists in our world? Or did true feelings remain in the last century?
Imagine that tomorrow you wake up as a woman. What will you do first? The answer - I will faint in front of the mirror - is not accepted.
Dial my number! I really want to hear your voice.
Let's create a virtual time machine. I would go back to my childhood. Where do you want to go?
Popping bubbles on packaging is my weakness! Do you like to indulge in this?
Do you believe that you can find your favorite girl on this site?
You are such a serious guy. You've probably never done anything crazy?
Who would you like to find on this site?
Bet I can cheer you up with just one message?
I think I've met the guy of my dreams. Do you know who he is? Hint - just look in the mirror.
Do you like proactive girls?
Why does stupidity never go out of fashion?
I accuse you of stealing! Why did you steal my heart?
Your gaze haunts me. How did you capture my heart so quickly?
You reminded me of a purebred cat. Can I pet you?
Morning, delicious breakfast, walk in the park... How is your day going?
I've been admiring your photos for an hour now. Why are you so handsome?
I'm sorry for interrupting. The opinion of a real man is urgently needed. Can you help?
What a coincidence!!! You also vacationed in Simferopol! Where was you, what did you see?
I suggest skipping the official introduction ceremony... There is a more interesting topic.
I constantly visit your page, you also often look at my profile. Maybe it's time to get acquainted?
It seems that my profile has interested you. Are you afraid to start a conversation? No problem! I will help. Hello! Let's get acquainted?
For the second day now my imagination has been confused. I don’t know what to write to such a handsome guy. Maybe we can start communicating with a standard greeting?
What about the "open relationship" status?
I feel like there is something in common between us. Can you tell me what exactly?
You remind me of a sweet dessert: beautiful and delicious. Just a dream! Tell me a secret, are there any disadvantages?
You have a very beautiful name. But I want to know something else about you.
At first glance, it is clear that you are a respectable and handsome guy. What's on your mind?
Your piercing gaze captivated my heart. How do you do it?
Let's play the game "Catch a Compliment"? You are very beautiful! It's your turn.
I'm going to take my license. Help me solve one question?
Do you think I'm an ordinary girl? But no! I came from another galaxy. My mission is to find a handsome guy! And I found it! Get ready! You're flying away with me!
I'm collecting material for an article about dating sites. I need the opinion of one nice guy. Can you help?
I collect ideas on how to meet a handsome guy. I'd like to ask you a couple of questions.
All the guys on this site just pale in comparison to you.
You remind me of a warm blanket. In your arms I want to hide from all troubles. It's always cozy and warm with you.
Young man! Aren't you ashamed to hurt the heart of a lonely girl?
We play forfeits. I had a task: to meet the most handsome guy on a dating site. Can you help me complete the task?
As they say, it was not! It is better to scold yourself for what you have done than for what you have missed. I want to meet you. Let me know if you don't mind.
Why do I need a blanket! Your look will warm you even in the most severe frost.
Do you know how offended I am? I’ve been admiring your photo for two days now, and you haven’t written to me.
I dream of drinking a cup of delicious coffee in my favorite cafe. Won't you keep me company?
Excuse me, can I claim a place in your heart?
Will you be my guide from the land of loneliness?
I'm just drowning in your eyes. Please throw me a life preserver!!!
Perhaps I’ll write a poem “Your eyes are a magnet...”. And it will be dedicated to you!
Your manly cheekbones just drive me crazy.
A man is a polygamous creature. Is this a myth or reality?
I’m ready to go to the ends of the world with you.
Name the 10 most attractive things about a girl.
Brutal question for a serious guy! How is a drill different from a screwdriver?
Imagine that the world will end tomorrow. How will you spend your last day?
There's something special about you. But I still can’t understand what exactly. Give me a little hint?
They say money is everything. But can money buy happiness?
I read an interesting fact today! It turns out that reproduction in zero gravity is impossible. Did you know about this?
Today I dreamed that a handsome man came into my house and promised to make me happy. Was it you by chance?
If you do what they say, you can get sugar! And if you show initiative, you can grab two pieces!
Women's logic is a trauma for the male psyche. Do you agree?
I constantly notice that only men shake the gun after refueling the car. Tell me the secret, why?
Of course, there are many jokes about a woman driving. But I’m haunted by the thought of what will happen if I press the gas and brake pedals at the same time?
Cinderella married the prince. He scattered rose petals around the room. But at 12 o'clock they turned into socks. Is this joke about you? Or do your socks live together in one place?

Competent dialogue technique

Basic principle: ask the right questions . They will help you avoid awkward pauses and dead ends when you both don't know what to say. Correct questions are those that require an open, that is, detailed answer . To make it clearer, I will give rough but understandable examples:

Incorrect: “Did you have breakfast today?” "Did you like the film?" “Have you tried this dish?”

Correct: “What did you have for breakfast today?” “What are your impressions of the film?” “Which cuisine do you like best and why?”

In general, it’s understandable. I go into more detail about the technique of such questions with examples in the publication What to talk about with a girl: 54 smart questions (opens in a new tab).

And further. It is important to understand that all the topics proposed below are just the beginning of the conversation. In each of these topics, you can (and should!) ask a few more questions so that it does not seem that you are scalding according to a pre-prepared template.

Try to make one flow from the other.

Listen to the answers carefully . This will kill 2 birds with one stone:

- you will be able to catch on to the said detail and develop the conversation further with another logical question or your own story; - get to know her better and understand for yourself whether it is worth continuing this acquaintance further.

What next: how to keep his attention and interest

How to keep a guy's attention on a dating site

As it became clear, you can attract the attention of a guy on a dating site very easily. You don't have to be the queen of flirting. The formula for success is very simple: attractive appearance and a little initiative - you're done! Cupid's arrow is launched into the heart of the chosen one! The main thing is to carefully study the profile and think about what you can write to the guy. The list of questions from the previous paragraph will always help.

Now the most crucial moment begins. You have to maintain male interest in your person. Otherwise he will leave in English. And we don’t need such an ending at all.

Quickly remember how not to lose your treasured interlocutor on a dating site:

Let's not forget about women's pride . You should not show your urgent need in his presence. What to text a guy when he doesn't text? Anything, just don’t be bombarded with dreary messages: “Hey, where are you?”, “I’m waiting for your answer! Why are you silent?".
Conversations are devoted to his interests . The male ego loves to be the center of attention. Just find out and discuss information, but don’t pretend that you have the same interests. It’s unlikely that you watch football on weekends or enjoy spending time in the garage.
The best “bait” for attracting attention is a request for help . Well, men like to feel superior. Therefore, quickly scout out his area of interest. And go ahead - pretend to be a girl in need of help.

Remember! Dating sites love flirting and strong feelings. It is rare to find a man here who dreams of friendly communication. Therefore, try to move from virtual communication to real meetings. This is where the fun begins.

The topic of conversation is the key to success

Live conversation is very different from correspondence. Here you can’t insert an emoticon, a funny picture, or copy someone else’s joke. You need to independently interest the girl, cheer her up, win her over, and make her like you .

Sooner or later, all men find themselves in an awkward situation when they are simply speechless on a date. In some cases, women simply ignore the interlocutor, do not carry on the conversation, answer in monosyllables, or simply shake their heads.

They shift the responsibility for the dialogue to the man, so he has the right to choose the topic of conversation himself, and the main thing here is not to make a mistake.

It’s unfair, but nature ordered it this way and a man is obliged to be a leader, even if he doesn’t feel like a leader at all.

Don't worry if your sense of humor is poorly developed, you can learn everything. No one is born a great comedian, everything comes with experience. Watch pick-up comedies and pay attention to how famous seducers behave. If you are surrounded by only logical programmers with a specific sense of humor, then be sure to find cheerful and positive friends. It is much easier to hone your sense of humor in a company than alone.

Self-irony is especially valuable when communicating with a girl. A strong man is not afraid of his weaknesses, admits his shortcomings and can talk about them calmly and with humor.