Bernard Shaw once criticized the work of one artist. He asks indignantly:
— How can you evaluate painting? You haven't painted a single picture!
- What is true is true! However, I can express an opinion about an omelet, although I have never laid a single egg in my life.
A quick way to learn how to argue and argue your position super convincingly, develop (yes, that’s right) confidence and find your own speaking style is to read our mega-helpful letter today. Tips, rules and recommendations from the books of rhetoric guru, business coach, writer and radio host Nikita Nepryakhin.
How to convince a person: the basics
To convince someone of something, you need to evoke a response - one of the main methods of advertising. But how to do that? Arguing about what the other person wants and drawing conclusions from it is a sure way to nowhere. It's like shooting sparrows from a cannon and thinking that at least one shot will hit. If you want to get a person to do what you want, don't make assumptions. Develop your ability to persuade. These principles will help you do this.
Persuasion is not manipulation
Manipulation is the forcible coercion of a person to do something that is contrary to his desires. Persuasion is the art of persuading a person to do something that suits his interests and benefits you.
Convince those who can be convinced
Before learning how to persuade people, it is worth remembering that you cannot convince a person to do something that contradicts his principles and moral standards. But at the right moment and under the right circumstances, anyone can be convinced, but it is not a fact that this will happen quickly. Political campaigns spend a lot of time and money trying to win over the small percentage of swing voters whose votes decide the outcome of an election.
The first step of persuasion is to recognize the people who will eventually come to accept your point of view and to direct your attention and energy towards them.
Context and time
The fundamental building blocks of persuasion are context and time. Context determines what is acceptable under particular circumstances.
For example, the Stanford prison experiment showed that overachieving students can be turned into dictators.
This psychological experiment was conducted in 1971 by American psychologist Philip Zimbardo. During the research, volunteers from the psychology department played the roles of prisoners and guards. A makeshift prison was created for them in the basement of the Faculty of Psychology. Contrary to the psychologist's expectations, the volunteers quickly adapted to their roles. During the experiment, it turned out that every third guard showed sadistic tendencies, and the prisoners were morally depressed and traumatized.
This experiment showed that people adapt to every situation they find themselves in. And it is the context that determines whether you can convince a person to do what you want or not.
Time also plays an important role. It determines what we want from life and from other people. We often marry people who are different from those we dated in our youth because our desires change.
To convince you, you need to interest
You will never be able to convince someone of anything who is not interested in what you have to say. Most of us are interested in ourselves. Most of the time we think about money, love or health. One of the most important principles of persuasion is to talk to listeners about themselves. This will help you keep their attention at all times.
Briefly about what you can learn from the book
How to talk about your strengths without looking like a braggart.
What two words increase your ability to persuade.
How you can get more through gratitude.
When providing bonuses can reduce sales.
How a high-quality product increases sales of old products.
How to promote products or services.
What can the 2nd additional request lead to?
How to give gifts correctly during sales or provision of services so that clients are more grateful and appreciate the gift.
How a simple question provides support for you and your ideas.
Thanks to which people fulfill long-term commitments.
How to turn your weaknesses into strengths.
How to convince a person of something: general rules
In addition to the principles of persuasion, there are also rules that are worth learning. They will help you understand human psychology and it will be easier for you to convince anyone of anything.
"Tit for Tit"
If someone helped you, you will feel obligated to help him. The desire to help others in order to survive as a species is embedded in us at the genetic level.
You can use the desire for mutual exchange to your advantage. By providing small gestures of help to others, you give yourself the opportunity to ask for larger favors from them in the future. They will be happy to help you.
Read
How to influence people: the Toyoda Sakichi method
Persistence pays off
People who are willing to persist in pursuing goals and demonstrate their importance excel in the art of persuasion. Historical figures were able to convince huge masses of people of their ideas because they persistently pursued their goals.
Remember Abraham Lincoln. Before he was elected president of the United States, he lost his mother, three sons, a girlfriend, a business, and lost eight races. But that didn't stop him. He persistently walked towards his goal, convincing people to believe in him, in him. And he succeeded.
Give sincere compliments
How to get a person to do what you want? Compliment him.
A person will believe anything if it is a compliment. Because we all like praise, we need the approval of other people. If we hear a compliment from someone, we treat that person better. Since we tend to trust people we feel good about, it will be easier to convince someone of something if you are kind to them.
Try to give people sincere compliments, especially for things for which they are not usually praised. This is the simplest persuasion technique that costs nothing but a minute of thought.
Set Expectations
To be persuasive, you need to be able to influence the expectations of others. The CEO who promises a 20 percent increase in sales and delivers a 30 percent wins. A CEO who promises a 40% increase but delivers 35% loses. To be persuasive, you need to understand the expectations of others and always exceed them.
Do not make fast conclusions
Never jump to conclusions about what the other side needs. Always offer your price. Very often in sales we do not risk offering our product or our services because we think that the buyer is not interested or financially unavailable.
If you want to persuade a person to do something, you don’t need to guess what he wants or doesn’t want. Always offer what you have. There is no need to make decisions for people - let them do it themselves.
Make them miss you
The price of everything except what is necessary for survival is relative. Sometimes we want to buy a product simply because others want it. If you want people to want what you offer them, make it exclusive. Even if your product is yourself.
Create a sense of relevance
If you want people to take action immediately, you need to create a sense of urgency in them. If we can't bring ourselves to do something right now, it's likely that we won't be able to do it in the future. People need to be convinced of the present, and a sense of urgency is our greatest asset.
The power of the image
The power of your image often helps to convince a person more than any of your words. Because this is how a person works: we are much more influenced by what we see than by what we hear. It’s not for nothing that the saying appeared: “It’s better to see once than to hear seven times.”
Perhaps this is why pharmaceutical companies are so open about the possible side effects of their drugs when in their advertising they show models watching the sunset in Hawaii.
Perfect the first impression you make on people. Learn to paint in the minds of others a picture of the future that you offer them.
Tell the truth
Sometimes, in order to convince a person that you are right, the easiest way is to tell him what others do not want to say about him. The moments when we have to face the harsh truth become the most significant in our lives. Try to tell the truth - without judgment or hidden agenda - and the person will probably surprise you with their reaction.
Make contact
We like people who are similar to us. This manifests itself not only in our conscious decisions, but also in our unconscious behavior. Reflecting and imitating the behavior of others (body language, speech rhythm, intonation) will help you establish contact with your interlocutors. They will feel more comfortable and be more open to your suggestions.
find out
4 Misconceptions About Body Language
Remember eye contact
When communicating with another person, we look into his eyes. Non-verbal communication is very important, because this is how we maintain a conversation and listen carefully to the interlocutor. This is how communication between two people works. What should you do when communicating with the public? Communicating with an audience is much more difficult than communicating face-to-face with another person. There may be dozens of people, or even hundreds, in front of us. When we speak and interact with the audience, it is important to use eye contact. Not every person can do this, as he may be frightened by unfriendly looks. Find a person in the room, focus your attention on that person. After some time, you may find another person with your eyes. This may seem like a daunting task at first. But focusing on the audience's eyes will help you concentrate and perform successfully. Make eye contact with your listener and you can win their hearts. They will remember you and think you are a great speaker.
How to convince people: personal skills
Develop these skills if you want people to listen to you. Bring them almost to reflexes.
Flexibility of behavior
Most often, the situation is controlled not by the most powerful, but by the most flexible. Children can be very persuasive because they are always willing to change their behavior until they get what they want. They can be offended, cry, bargain, beg, and charm. And parents have only one answer - “no.” The larger your “repertoire”, the more flexible you are, the more convincing you will be.
Learn to transfer energy
Have you ever wondered why some people are able to convince people that they are right, while others are not? There are simply people who take our energy, and there are those who give it away. The most persuasive people know how to motivate, inspire, and energize others. Eye contact or simple touch may be enough for this. Don't forget to laugh and let the person know that you are listening and hearing him.
Learn to convey your thoughts clearly
Einstein said: “Everything must be simplified as much as possible. But it’s not simpler than that.” In other words: If you can't explain your point of view to an eighth-grader so that he can clearly convey it to another adult, you'll have to simplify it. The art of persuasion in simplicity. Simplify your thoughts as much as possible and talk to others about what interests them.
Be prepared - it will work in your favor
In order to convince or change someone’s mind about something, you must always have enough information about your surroundings. Know your audience. For example, people who don't have cars cannot be convinced to buy auto parts from you. Therefore, always try to find out something about the person to whom you want to prove something.
The more thoroughly you prepare, the more convincing you will be. For example, you will have a much better chance of getting a job with a company if you know everything about its history, products and services.
Stay calm in conflicts
People are always less effective when they walk on the edge. Even if the situation gets tense, you will manage it if you can remain calm and not get emotional. In conflict situations, people always turn to those who know how to control their emotions.
Use anger purposefully
Most people don't like conflict. If you are ready for confrontation and passion, your interlocutor will most likely back down. Be careful and avoid conflicts if you cannot cope with your emotions and lose control of yourself. But remember that you can always purposefully use anger to your advantage to get someone to do what you want.
Confidence
There is nothing more exciting and attractive than confidence. A person who exudes self-confidence will always be able to convince a person that he is right. If you truly believe in what you do, you can always get people to do what they need and get what you need in return.
Get rid of parasitic words
When people are nervous and don't know what to say, they fill the silence with unnecessary words or sounds. The words “uh”, “well”, “ahh”, “in short”, “here”, “this” clog the speaker’s speech and distract the attention of the listeners. Replace unnecessary sounds with words that make sense. For example, “Let's take a look,” “let's move on to...”, “one more important thought,” and so on. Or use pauses instead of filling silence. For more detailed information on how to get rid of filler words, read this article.
Getting pregnant during menopause naturally
Based on all that has been said above and considering the problem of whether a woman can become pregnant after menopause at the age of 50 or at that age it is already possible to stop breastfeeding, it is worth noting that there is such a possibility, therefore it is impossible to refuse to use contraceptives.
Those spouses who, on the contrary, would like to have a child in adulthood should understand that the chances are significantly reduced. In this case, it is worth turning to reproductive medicine services.
If you want to get pregnant exclusively naturally, you should consider a number of factors:
- Most often, ovulation occurs on days 12-14 of the cycle. It all depends on its duration. The process can be monitored using ultrasound monitoring or independently by measuring rectal temperature and using special tests.
- With unprotected sexual intercourse, there is a chance of pregnancy at the time of ovulation, 3-5 days before it or 2-3 days after it.
- For fertilization, it is important that the seminal fluid contains a sufficient number of active sperm capable of conception. This can be checked by taking a spermogram test.
With a successful combination of circumstances, you can get pregnant even after 50 years.
Where to study:
The Orator Club
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Probability of getting pregnant after menopause at 49-55
Often older young ladies come to the gynecologist with the question, what are their chances of getting pregnant if they have not had menstruation for several years? In the absence of sufficient knowledge and statistical data, the answer involuntarily suggests itself that the probability is zero.
However, in reality this is not the case. It is during menopause that the number of unplanned pregnancies is much greater than among young girls who are full of strength and health. Experts cannot give an exact answer why this happens. Often at this age, even those who have been diagnosed with infertility for a long time become pregnant.
Doctors' recommendations if you don't have your period
In the absence of menstruation, a woman needs to regularly visit a gynecologist. The doctor will be able to determine the reason for the cessation of discharge and, if necessary, prescribe an examination and comprehensive treatment.
In some cases, to restore the menstrual cycle, you should follow certain tips:
- proper nutrition;
- good quality sleep;
- normalization of the daily routine;
- improvement of psycho-emotional state;
- taking vitamin complexes;
- elimination of inflammatory processes.
In case of artificial menopause, hormone replacement therapy is prescribed.
Most often, treatment is carried out on an outpatient basis. Hospitalization is necessary if serious health problems are identified.
Indications for termination of pregnancy during menopause
If a late pregnancy occurs during menopause, the decision to terminate is made if there are certain indications:
- diagnosing serious abnormalities in the fetus;
- threat to the life and health of a woman;
- a history of serious diseases of the heart, blood vessels, liver, kidneys;
- presence of genetic diseases in parents;
- deformation and narrowing of the pelvic bones;
- oncological disease;
- Alzheimer's disease, etc.
In postmenopausal women, age itself may be an indication for termination. However, the final decision is made by the woman based on personal beliefs and other factors.
Is it possible to get pregnant during menopause?
In medicine, the period of decline of the reproductive and menstrual function of the ovaries and the body as a whole is usually called menopause. During this time period, fertilization and pregnancy are possible. There are many examples of this.
If initially nature provides about 400,000 eggs in a woman’s body, but by the age of 50 this number is reduced to a thousand. In addition, as a result of decreased production of sex hormones, the egg may not mature to the required state. This significantly reduces the chances of conception as such, but does not reduce it to zero. Therefore, doctors recommend continuing to use various methods of contraception even after 50 years or more.
