Greetings, dear friend! Alexander Berezhnov, entrepreneur and founder of the “PAPA HELPED” project, is in touch.
I am familiar with the psychology of poverty firsthand and know how dangerous it is. “I’ve been sick” with her for about 20 years of my life, and my parents even longer.
In this article I will tell you what the psychology of poverty is, what reasons lead to it, and also give effective techniques that helped me get rid of this difficult condition and earn big money.
Poverty is not a vice? – let’s figure it out together!
What is the psychology of poverty
The psychology of poverty is a way of thinking in which all a person’s actions lead him either to losing money (it “slips through his fingers”) or does not allow him to earn more than a certain amount over a period.
Like an insidious virus, it is difficult to “treat.” The first thing you need to do to get out of the vicious circle of moneylessness is to admit that something is wrong with me and make a firm decision to change.
Otherwise, even the coolest psychologist or business coach will not help a person to part with this condition. It's like struggling with addiction. If a person does not admit that he is an “alcoholic,” then there is no point in treating him.
Maybe I will surprise you now, or maybe I will disappoint you, but most people in the world suffer from the psychology of poverty from birth. This is due to low self-esteem caused by social problems from childhood, material need and ignorance of parents in financial matters when raising a child.
Many of us have been told:
“You can’t earn a lot of money honestly,” “all the rich are thieves, boors and bloodsuckers.” The well-known expression: “Every cricket knows its nest” - seems to hint that if you were born among the poor, then there is no point in pretending to be a prince and striving for something more.
Sound familiar? For me personally – very much!
Psychocorrection
All complexes come from childhood, so it is necessary to give children the right psychological education in a timely manner. There is no need to prove to anyone that you are rich. No one has the right to condemn a person for being poor or rich. Today there is money, but tomorrow it may not be there. Everyone remembers how the currency changed and people lost a lot of money in their savings books. Back then people wanted to increase their capital, but it turned out the other way around.
Children must understand that any thing is money. You need to clearly distinguish between things that are necessary and those that are needed for fun. For example, a computer for a student in an institution where the main subject is computer science is a necessity, but a game console in adolescence, by and large, is not needed.
Just because there is no game console, the child does not become bad or defective. He must understand this first of all. Healthy self-esteem also plays a big role. If a child understands himself in society, understands his importance, it will not even occur to him to ask for a meaningless thing that everyone has. Identical things make us a herd, eradicating uniqueness, individuality, laying into the subconscious an attitude of the same type of behavior.
Signs of the psychology of poverty
There are many of them, but there is one main one (universal).
80% of people have signs of a poor man's psychology!
The main sign of the psychology of poverty is anger at the rich and envy of other people's well-being!
Observe your emotions and feelings. If you see a luxury car on the street, honestly tell me what you feel deep down?
If everything inside you is rejoicing and your inner voice screams: “ This is a car, dude!” If you tense up and you will have the same, 100% ” - that means everything is fine with you and you think positively.
Against…
If your gut tells you: “ What a bastard, I bought myself such a car!” Of course, it’s easy to approach the “chicks” with this one...” or “of course, my ancestors gave it to me...” or “a rich husband bought it...” or “he’s messing around with something, stole 100 pounds . In this case, the psychology of poverty is evident.
Don't be alarmed if the second option is closer to you. Recognizing the problem is half the solution.
The next sign of the psychology of poverty is the desire to “ appear and not be .
I’m sure you know people who, with their last money, bought a 10-15-year-old Behu or Porsche Cayenne, thousands for 500-600 rubles, and they didn’t even have money left for gasoline and repairs.
But to appear in the yard a couple of times in front of boys or girls in a cool car is the dream of their whole life. It is likely that this “trough” will fall apart the next day or its careless owner will “get involved” in repairing some expensive part for 100,000 rubles. Realizing this, a person with a poor mind still makes a decision about such an acquisition.
I’m not even talking about buying the best iPhone models on credit or using the latest “grandmother’s funeral”...
The third indicative sign of the psychology of poverty is to be friends with the poor, narrow-minded environment and be afraid to change it.
Sad but true!
Until now, I see quite a lot of young people who, like grandmothers on benches, discuss their difficulties and problems according to the principle “whoever has the best luck wins.”
Okay, pensioners are still talking about hard life, but young people... Nobody wants to work, everyone is waiting for manna from heaven or help from their parents.
Guys, go to work!
Another topic... A bunch of men are sitting, playing “tanks” and just toiling around with bullshit, while they are being worked on and on. Laziness, despondency and weakness of will are the best delicacies that feed the psychology of poverty.
Summarizing these signs, I will say that all of them in one way or another relate to the fear of change and are caused by a person’s own passivity.
Aphorism
As Bill Gates said: “A dollar can’t fit between your butt and the sofa.”
Honestly ask yourself whether you are an active person in life or a couch potato. Money doesn’t like lazy people and whiners; such people definitely won’t see wealth! My job is to share my opinion, but choose for yourself how you want to live.
Inaction
In order to achieve a high level of income, you need to get out of the so-called “comfort zone”, constantly develop, improve your professionalism, gain additional experience, or simply look for another job with more income. If a specialist has reached the limit in his field of activity, then he can start earning extra money to earn more money. For example, a teacher can earn extra money by tutoring.
Photo by Hutomo Abrianto on Unsplash
For a person with a poor lifestyle, all these actions are alien; he simply does not want to look for ways to earn more money. His poverty is a consequence of his own inaction.
Psychology of poverty: habits that condemn you to poverty
If the state of “poverty” is prolonged, it will invariably lead to the formation of negative “poor” habits. Below I have listed the main ones.
Thoughts can also be garbage; they shape your habits and through them, your destiny. Be carefull!
Habit 1. Avoid responsibility
Systematic avoidance of responsibility is an indicative feature of the poor. The person is not used to making independent decisions. All his life, someone did this for him: parents, state, employer.
When the time comes to start a family or make a firm, life-changing decision, the poor guy buries his head in the sand, like an ostrich, or simply runs away from the problem.
Someone turns to alcohol, someone stops communicating with people and begins to lead a reclusive lifestyle, professing the principle of the famous song: “if you don’t have a dog, your neighbor won’t poison it.”
That is, he doesn’t have a business, girlfriend, job or friends, then there won’t be any problems with this.
I often hear a popular excuse from people about a car.
I don't have a car because I want to be healthy and I walk. It’s faster to get there by public transport; you don’t have to look for parking, pay insurance, spend money on gas, or repairs. You won't get into an accident either...
God forbid, if a person really thinks so and for objective reasons does not need a car. But, friends, it seems to me that most people who say this are lying.
They would be happy to learn how to drive or drive a good car, but there is no money. Such self-deception is one of the signs that a person has a psychology of poverty.
Habit 2. Focus on saving instead of increasing income
Saving is a completely useful and even necessary habit, if you do not turn it into an extreme.
Personally, it always annoys me when people count every penny and at the same time do not strive to earn more.
It doesn’t matter whether you are employed or have your own business, your profit is the difference between income and expenses.
It is not the one who saves who becomes rich, but the one who earns a lot!
It is known that the poor spend everything they earn and constantly live in debt. But their expenses are small and many of them even distribute the available money well. This was the case, for example, with my parents. They could distribute every penny into piles: for rent, for food, for clothes.
But the trouble is, there is no profit, that is, at the end of the month there is nothing left. This happens not because the expenses are high, but because the income is small.
Read the article on the topic: Where to get money for free
You know, the expression about a bird in the hand is still popular. Many people choose this small bird instead of the big crane. Most people work in unloved and low-paid jobs, calling it stable, instead of taking the risk and ending this humiliating life forever.
Personally, I made the decision to catch a crane a long time ago and I was right!
Conclusion: strive to increase your income, not just save!
What about stability? To hell with it!
There is a good joke on this topic:
A journalist asks one wealthy businessman: “How can you do business, does n’t it scare that you don’t know exactly how much you will get in a month?” To which the businessman replied, “ Doesn’t it scare what you know?”
No comments.
Habit 3. Communicate with pessimists and losers
I already wrote above that the “grandmothers on the bench” have not yet disappeared and there are a lot of them. I hope, dear friend, that you are not one of those people. “Grinding” other people’s affairs and successes, “washing out the bones” of friends, acquaintances or show business stars is the favorite pastime of “rogues”.
At a certain stage, such “productive” communication becomes a habit, like beer on Fridays, and it is very difficult to break it. Be carefull!
Habit 4. “Be negative” and complain about life
A dangerous and destructive habit. Sometimes it is a sign of real depression and definitely a symptom of the psychology of poverty. If “negatives” appear in your environment, try to reduce or interrupt communication with them.
Otherwise, you will become saturated with this slag and after a short time you will become the same weak-willed pessimist. Even if these are your close friends or relatives, do not try to change them, just become more successful yourself and through your own example you can influence your environment.
Habit 5. Accumulating old and broken things
Hoarding junk is another common habit of people with a poverty mentality. Grandma’s old closets in many apartments are still filled to capacity with 20-year-old things that “will definitely come in handy someday.”
Get rid of the clutter in your closet and your mind will be clear of it!
Grandmother pushes:
Well, this skirt... It will be great for my granddaughter to grow into. “It doesn’t matter that I wore it in 1970, and the girl is now only one and a half years old. At the age of 17 she will wear it to her school prom.”
I'm exaggerating this. But I still remember my grandparents, when such statements were made with absolute seriousness.
Broken things are the same story. For example, for about 20 years my grandfather put all sorts of pieces of iron, rusty taps, chipped bricks, broken sleds and other junk into the basement of our now former house.
When my grandfather passed away, I had to make several trips with various carts and machines to clear out the basement.
To let something new (money) into your home, you need to give it space and free yourself from the old, both physically and psychologically.
Hoarding old stuff is a habit that our parents and grandparents developed during times of hunger and scarcity. Now everything can be bought, all that remains is to learn how to earn money. Almost nothing more is required from a modern person. There is no need to chop wood to light the stove, grow vegetables and fruits, or sew clothes.
Find a business that interests you, is in demand on the market, and will bring you a lot of income. Yes, it's not easy, but it's definitely worth a try!
Often, to significantly increase your income you need to open your own business. I wrote in a separate article how you need to think to become an entrepreneur.
Passivity
A rolling stone gathers no moss. The result can only appear as a consequence of actions, moreover, targeted and persistent. If you are not satisfied with the salary, you need to look for a high-paying job. At the same time, you should understand that the range of duties and responsibilities will be completely different, but this is the only way to change your life.
A person who is confident in his inability to cope with complex tasks, who does not try to try himself in a new business, who does not believe in his own strength, will remain poor forever. Poverty and passivity are sisters.
How to get rid of the psychology of poverty - TOP 5 effective ways
Have you found signs and habits of the psychology of poverty in yourself or someone you know? No problem!
Below I have told you how to get rid of them once and for all. Just keep in mind that this will take time. After all, our thinking is rather inert and does not quickly “let go” of the familiar picture of the world.
Method 1. Take responsibility for your life
Tell yourself:
Today I made a firm decision to take full responsibility for my life! From now on, everything that happens to me, in one way or another, concerns my conscious choice. I am free to make my own decisions about what to do and what not to do, and I am aware of the consequences of such decisions.
This approach to life will give you a powerful start in eradicating the psychology of poverty.
Freedom and happiness are inextricably linked with the concept of responsibility. This especially applies to men!
Method 2. Change environment
If you feel that your environment is engaged in outright degradation - start changing it!
Do it smoothly, don’t be rude to your friends and acquaintances, don’t pretend to be the “right guy.” Engage in self-development and start communicating with successful and purposeful people.
This way, your old environment will soon “fall off” naturally, and you will feel a wave of positive changes. Your thinking will change, and you will no longer be as dependent as before on other people’s opinions and past relationships with people.
Method 3: Acquire a Marketable Skill
Get involved in a specific business that will bring you more income than you already have. An in-demand marketable skill is what you need to earn more. Don’t cling to a stable and low-paid job, constantly learn new things.
Perhaps the business you are currently doing needs a big adjustment or a complete replacement with a new one. I know from myself that starting from scratch is always difficult, but sometimes it is a necessary necessity, which will eventually lead you to wealth, happiness and spiritual harmony.
Method 4. Study other people's success stories
Studying the experiences of other successful people does not guarantee that you yourself will become successful and earn a lot of money. But this method will definitely begin to change your thinking, gradually eliminating negative attitudes.
Many outstanding people started from scratch and went through a difficult journey to become rich and famous. After getting acquainted with their biography, you will see that nothing is impossible, you will be inspired and begin to act.
Method 5. Set specific financial goals and work towards them
A goal that is specific, measurable, achievable and time-bound is what you need!
If you install it, you will definitely “bury” the psychology of poverty once and for all. She will run from you like hell from incense, her heels sparkling.
Go ahead, find like-minded people - this will make it much easier for you not to give up. I recommend searching the Internet or buying books by Brian Tracy, who is one of the best experts in the world when it comes to setting goals and achieving success.
Nothing will work anyway
Low self-esteem is a direct consequence of a lack of vivid impressions, languishing in an uninteresting job and the fear of changing anything in your life. It’s a bleak picture, but the poor man clings to such a life with all his might and is terrified of losing any of its gray shreds.
There is no way to lose a boring job or move out of a small apartment; even on vacation, such people usually go to the same place so as not to take risks. But you can be proud of your patience and endurance. A person psychologically predisposed to poverty refuses to understand that in order to get results it is necessary to act and not be afraid to start all over again.
Books and materials that will help you change “poor” thinking to “rich” thinking
- The book “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill. I believe that this is a fundamental work in the psychology of success. The book outlines the thoughts of the richest people of the 20th century. Journalist Napoleon Hill devoted his entire life to researching the principles of success and achieving material independence. To do this, he interviewed hundreds of prominent personalities of the first half and mid-20th century. I read it with pleasure and recommend it to everyone.
- The Rich Dad series of books by Robert Kiyosaki. Guys, this is something! I wrote above about his first and most famous book. Today Kiyosaki has books on investing, running a business, and financial literacy for women, teenagers and children. This is a treasure trove of financial knowledge for the whole family!
- Robert Kiyosaki's game “CashFlow”.
Game Cash Flow by Robert Kiyosaki, board version 101
It dramatically changes thinking and helps to transfer game situations to real life. Now there are several versions of this game: Cash Flow 101 and 202. The first version is simpler, it is better to start with it and play 10-15 times. “Cash Flow 202” is for advanced players. - Film “The Secret”. You've probably heard about it or already watched it. It talks about the “law of attraction” and the power of our thoughts.
- Video “Get Rich in 60 Minutes” – an hour-long seminar by Robert Kiyosaki with translation. It's really cool, I've watched it more than once. In a succinct form, Robert provides a clear understanding of the nature of money and provides examples of how rich and poor people think when handling their finances.
- Russian documentary film “10 laws of wealth”. It came out a long time ago, but clearly illustrates the basic approaches of people to making money. From a scientific point of view, it explains why money “sticks” to some people, while others are “bypassed”. All this is very well shown through the prism of the Russian mentality. I recommend watching!
Part 4. Work is not a wolf, it won’t run into the forest
What prevents you from breaking out of the swamp of dull pseudo-comfort and rising from the bottom? What prevents you from overcoming your passion for freebies and transforming envy into a desire to improve your life?
- Lack of interest in the matter
One could simply say - banal laziness, but everything is much more complicated. Homo N. sincerely does not understand what it means to work with pleasure. Any work for him is a chore. Hard labor. Even if he manages to turn his hobby into a job, after a while he will begin to hate his hobby. Often, this attitude towards work is passed on from generation to generation: the child takes the example of his parents, “pulling the burden,” and transfers this attitude first to schoolwork, and then to any “stress.”
- What will this give me?
Homo N. hates doing anything for free. This is reflected in the fear of overworking, and redneckness, and pettiness, and the feeling that they want to deceive him and take advantage of his work. “I’m not a fool to play donkeys for free!” - Homo N. answers when he is offered, say, to take part in landscaping the local area. He looks at volunteers with contempt.
Hence the utilitarian attitude towards work for the future, study, self-education: Homo N. is ready for this only if he is guaranteed something - employment or at least a “crust”.
- Unwillingness to limit yourself in anything
To be honest, Homo N. and guarantees are not always motivating. After all, for the sake of a happy tomorrow, you need to today , give up rest, set aside part of your salary, etc. Our hero is not capable of such feats.
- Dreams don't become goals
Homo N. loves to dream. Among the representatives of this species there are many adherents of visualization: they visualize cars/yachts/villas, and so on. But dreams remain dreams - you already understand why.
- Ignoring the odds
Homo N. is waiting for what he wants to be brought to him on a silver platter. And when they bring it to him, he grimaces: “What, you also have to chew?” Life throws up chances over and over again, but they float by.
- Action based on templates
Following patterns of behavior borrowed from the environment is one of the most serious problems of a person with the psychology of poverty. Since childhood, he has been integrated into a system that did not allow his parents to escape poverty. And then it follows the beaten paths. It's easier than finding your own way.
Meanwhile, moving on autopilot lulls the brain, it becomes ossified, stops developing, and then begins to degrade.
- Fear of freedom
Sometimes Homo N. looks outside his comfort zone. This zone restricts freedom, and the system prevailing in it sometimes resembles a prison. But, upon reflection, Homo N. comes to the conclusion that there, beyond the foggy border, there may be all sorts of dangers. Cold, hunger, scary monsters. Or maybe they’ll even force you to work for real! (There are such rumors.) And here you sleep like a white man, on a bunk, and gruel is given out regularly, and most importantly, you can get some food.
Well, screw this freedom.
- Fear of the new
Hence the fear of change. Homo N. the road is his imaginary stability. Novelty is stressful for any person, since the brain does not like shocks. But people who strive for success are not afraid of stress. And Homo N. hides in a hole.
- Part of the crowd
Homo N. is a conformist to the core. He is afraid of becoming a black sheep (and he himself is ready to join the crowd in a witch hunt). As sociologists have noted, representatives of the poor are characterized by a low level of critical thinking and susceptibility to mass stereotypes, cultural, religious and national prejudices. The level of education, environmental pressure and the reluctance to work independently have an effect.
- Give me some advice for food
Homo N. is extremely dependent on other people's opinions. Subconsciously, he avoids responsibility and provides himself with the opportunity to declare that he is not to blame for his mistakes - he just got bad advisers.
There are also such comrades among traders - they join the company of guru-oriented ones.
- Finding easy ways
Since Homo N. does not like to work and worships freebies, he spends a significant part of his time looking for easy ways to success. But in the end, he either becomes a “sucker” who is being scammed by scammers, or he himself takes a crooked path.
If such a person gets into trading, he will probably try to find a magic strategy, and then begin to try other options that promise quick riches: from paying for the “most accurate signals” to crazy bets with crazy risk.
- Low self-esteem
It would seem - just shake yourself up, pull yourself together! But it’s not only laziness and inertia that prevents you from doing this, but also low self-esteem. Homo N.’s feelings range from “I don’t deserve this” to “who will give it to me.” And low ambitions provoke...
- Lack of self-confidence
Well, the cherry on the cake: lack of self-confidence. “I can’t do it” is a typical life slogan of Homo N., who in fact is not going to try.
- Whining and self-pity
The role of the victim is the favorite role of Homo N. He sincerely feels sorry for himself. Suffering. Feels offended by fate. Homo N. has very big claims against the universe: he is sure that others have suffered more - and undeservedly!
Poor Man's Syndrome
In addition to credit dependence, our country has another scourge - the lack of a mature middle class culture. Experts from Rossiyskaya Gazeta (the official newspaper of the Russian Government, well, you get the idea) claim that over the past 19 years, the income gap between the highest paid and lowest paid workers has decreased from 34 to 13 times. In reality, we see falling real incomes and a growing number of poor people. Many people struggle to survive on the minimum wage, and this is a terrible problem. But for some reason, those people who receive 30-40 thousand a month and, it would seem, can be considered “middle class”, also feel like beggars. What are the reasons? Let's figure it out.
Your stability has become unstuck
It’s very banal, but many refuse to admit to themselves that they are afraid to leave their usual, hated and boring job with a stable salary of 40 thousand rubles. After all, it is unknown what the change will lead to; there is a great risk of screwing up and becoming completely impoverished. Therefore, hundreds, thousands of clerks in dull shirts trudge to the office at 9.00, replaying their non-existent life in their heads under heroic songs, in which they are famous businessmen, singers and writers, giving interviews to Yuri Dudu. It's easier to leave it all in your dreams than to have the courage to try to change your life for the better by carefully planning your expenses, scheduling, and making efforts to live life to the fullest. Holding on to a job you don't like out of fear of changing something is one of the first signs of the poor man's syndrome.
Credit bondage
Let's start with the most obvious.
Most Russians are drowning in the swamp of credit dependence. I really want a flagship phone, a laptop, new furniture for the kitchen. Offers of “installment plans without overpayment”, all sorts of “0-0-24” and other tempting varieties of cheese in bank mousetraps look tempting. Many people take out loans without hesitation, because it seems that paying 10 thousand out of their salary of 30,000 is a completely acceptable option. But one important variable is lost in this equation: mandatory payments. Let's look at it with an example. There is Vasya, he lives in a rented apartment and works as an SMM specialist with a salary of 30 thousand rubles. He decided to buy himself a new laptop in installments with a monthly payment of 6,000 rubles. It seems to Vasya that this is a reasonable amount, because after deducting the loan, he will have as much as 24 thousand left. “Stop, Vasya, think!” - we shout, but he is determined: he has already filled out the paperwork and, happy, is taking home his brand new laptop. And this is where the problems begin. Vasya did not take into account that he lives in a rented studio: minus 13,000 rubles every month. Well, it looks like there are 17,000 left - is that normal? Are we holding on? Now winter has come, and +1000 rubles for heating were added to the housing and communal services receipt - another 3,500 rubles are taken off Vasya’s card. There are only 13,500 left, six of which Vasya must give for his devilish laptop, and somehow live on the remaining 7,500. Month. We haven’t yet taken into account unforeseen expenses: either a toothache, or the boss’s birthday, or the toilet leaking... In general, press F to you, Vasya.
The story sounds funny, but in fact, half of our country lives this way. A loan for a wedding, after which marriage is no longer a joy, a loan for a car that was hit at a traffic light, and now the trunk won’t close.
Bank marketers are very diligent in fulfilling their task: they position consumer loans as something that allows a person who has little income to enjoy a life that he cannot afford. Do you eat doshiraki and live in a rented one-room apartment? Why don't you buy an iPhone, bro! Growing up in the countryside and working at a car wash? Let's throw you a Great Gatsby-themed wedding!
In reality, this attempt to live beyond one's means turns into absolute hell for anyone who has taken out a thoughtless loan that they will not be able to repay painlessly. The amount you can afford, according to experts, is a maximum of 30% of your income minus mandatory payments . In other words, to stay afloat, Vasya needed to choose a cheaper laptop. If we focus on the 30% formula, the optimal monthly payment for Vasya should not exceed 4,050 rubles. However, we think that even with a balance of 9,450 rubles, he won’t really feel the difference. So, whatever one may say, the most reliable way to protect yourself from loans is not to take out loans.
Part 5. Hatred of other people's success
One of the most serious problems of Homo N. is the inability to follow the example of successful people. This group of behavioral patterns and attitudes is so harmful that it deserves special mention.
- Neighbor's cow
Homo N. sincerely hates a successful neighbor, colleague, classmate. He is even ready to sacrifice his own cow, just so that his neighbor’s two die. Gouge out your own eyes if your neighbor loses two. Instead of focusing on his own affairs, Homo N. wastes his energy and nerve cells on paying attention to other people's lives. Sometimes he even wastes his time on dirty tricks and intrigues.
And why aren’t useful connections being established?
- Devaluing other people's achievements
Homo N. is sure that successful people have everything much easier than him: studies, career, business. Typical words from the vocabulary of Homo N.: “lucky”, “and I’m here like a fish on ice”, “that’s also an achievement for me”, “yes, I would with such money/talents/starting conditions”, “everyone around is thieves”, “ probably through connections."
And Homo N. is firmly convinced that bosses and businessmen are idle, amusing themselves by “spreading rot” of their subordinates. (Homo N. himself would have done exactly this if he had been “placed”).
It would seem that the person is jealous. But everything is much worse: Homo N. is closing the doors to a normal career and honest business.
- I would steal too, let them teach me...
Homo N. will never forgive his neighbor for buying a new car, but he bows to wealth and power. And secretly admires theft on a global scale.
According to a survey by the Public Opinion Foundation, representatives of the poor largely believe that success is achieved through meanness and cunning. At the same time, the rich ranked labor first in this survey.
But Homo N. will never believe that it works. Therefore, he tries to build a career by pleasing his superiors, intriguing and trying to break through to the “feeding trough”.
- Unsuccessful environment
Hatred of those who are better makes Homo N. avoid their circle. He is much more comfortable among people like him and those below him. Let them drag you to the bottom rather than cause an inferiority complex! (Successful people form their social circle exactly the opposite.)
And from here - all the same “broken windows”. The circle is closed. Is it possible to break it?
