The girl refused a relationship: why and what to do


In this article we will analyze and advise young people what to do in a situation when a girl does not want a relationship.

Many guys have encountered a situation where their girlfriend likes them, but does not want a serious relationship with them. Perhaps the girl is simply not ready to date a guy yet or she doesn’t have enough free time for a relationship. Let's try to figure out what to do if a girl refuses a relationship, is there a way out of this situation.

For what reasons does a girl refuse to date?

To deal with this problem, start playing by the girl’s rules. Tell your beloved that you understand her perfectly, talk to her very frankly. As a result, you will definitely find out the main reasons. They can be very diverse:

  • The girl recently broke up with another man, and therefore cannot forget this relationship.
  • The girl does not want to rush or rush into a new relationship.
  • Your loved one considers you a good friend (for now).
  • She is afraid of being disappointed in the relationship again.
  • The girl simply does not want to date any man.


There can be many reasons for a girl to refuse.
Whatever answer you receive, think about it, check it if possible. Watch your beloved, talk to your friends and acquaintances, listen to what exactly other people are saying about the girl. Do not attack her right away, because there is a chance that the girl will actually want to start a relationship with you in the future, but this may happen a little later.

The girl just doesn't want to date any man

A girl may tell you that she doesn't want to be in a relationship at all. There can be 2 main scenarios here:

  • She loves women (this happens, but very rarely).
  • She is deceiving both you and herself.

The second reason is considered more preferable. If your beloved claims that she does not need a relationship, then she wants to appear in your eyes as an independent woman, very strong. Also, a girl can deceive you so that you suffer or she is simply harmful.


The girl doesn't want a relationship

If in such a situation the girl allows you to touch her, you are connected by kisses and intimate relations, then you could find a cat that loves solitude. This picture may suit many people. However, the complexity of the current situation lies in the following - such a lady, in addition to you, may have several admirers, like the famous empress.

Beloved cannot be in a relationship

Sometimes the phrase “I don’t want” becomes the phrase “I can’t.” In such a situation, there may be several reasons, for example, study, health, family problems, and so on.

As a rule, such an answer is considered just an excuse. Because even diligent students and very busy ladies give up their own affairs, devoting themselves to their loved one. But, if a lady blames everything solely on circumstances, then she definitely doesn’t need you, she just doesn’t want to hurt you.

This theory can also be true if significant circumstances are present. For example, a girl is much younger or poorer than you. In such a situation, of course, some kind of obstacle may arise in front of the relationship.

Own benefit

Often a girl claims that she does not want a relationship where the guy is only a “slave” for her. She only refuses to have a relationship with you for a while. However, you can still communicate with her, help with work or study, and so on.


Meetings can be just for profit

Perhaps the time will come and she will want to have a relationship, but it will not be you. You still continue to help her, but at the same time you are jealous. This effect is commonly called the “friend zone”. Don’t let this situation start, otherwise you won’t succeed in your personal life.

The problem is you

If you are faced with such a situation, do not scold your loved one. Look for the problem only in yourself. Maybe you weren’t able to prove yourself as a potential partner, you didn’t prove to the girl that you can be completely different.

Most likely you are a very complex or, on the contrary, simple person, and this turned the girl off. Sometimes women are put off by being too serious. Because not every lady dreams of a fast-paced serious relationship. Every lady dreams of romance, flirting and so on.


The problem may lie with your partner.

Pay your attention to what style of clothing the girl prefers, what she is interested in, what kind of character she has. Men often make many mistakes, and therefore ladies do not like them. As a result, they also wonder why the girl refuses the relationship.

Whatever the situation with you, try to carefully understand the problem, do not get angry and do not make hasty decisions. You just have to understand why exactly everything happened this way.

Loss or future gain?

How do people react to failures in their lives? It's a pity that at some point you failed and lost what was valuable to you. Many people begin to grieve for what they have lost: “I am always unlucky. And this time I lost.” But let's think about it: did you lose or were you on the path to winning?

At the moment of failure, collapse, or loss of something valuable, a person does not get what he wants. Depending on the person’s attitude to what is happening, he wins or loses. How do you make a loss out of failure? You give up, engage in self-flagellation, try to find someone to blame for your troubles, cry, decide to no longer do what you failed at. Remember the cases when people break off a love relationship due to hostility and misunderstanding, after which each side draws conclusions: “I will never again date someone who can contradict me,” “It’s better to be lonely than to end up in…”, etc. d.

In other words, you are often willing to give up on something you failed at and never go back to it.

How do people turn failure into future gain? Now you have lost, failed, lost something valuable. But you still have experience - how not to make sure that what was valuable does not leave you again? There are people who search for those to blame, saying that it is not they, but those around them who are guilty of something. But successful people try to find their mistakes in what happened. Knowing what you did wrong will help you avoid doing the same thing again when you return to the activity at which you have failed.

You lost, but you also won, because now you have experience - what not to do in the future, how to behave so as not to suffer the same collapse again?

Who do you think will be a good family man: the one who has never been married before, or the one who has already been in it once? We can say that an experienced family man understands more about married life than someone who has never been a husband to someone. A former married person has experience in leading a family life, the person knows his shortcomings, understands what he wants to have in the future, and now, if he enters into a marriage union again, it will not be because of his youth and not because he has never been a spouse, but because of a real desire to do it. A man who was once married and a woman who was previously married are much more valuable than those who have not yet lived under the same roof with anyone. These people have experience, understanding and a willingness to get along with partners. This cannot be said about those who only have their head in the clouds regarding family life.

The value comes from those who already have experience of failure in the area in which you have teamed up. Of particular value are people who have not only experienced success or failure, but also come to conclusions about what they did wrong. If a person feels like a loser and blames other people for failures, then he has not learned any lessons or drawn any conclusions. It is better to refuse such a partnership. But a person who not only has experience in the area in which you agree is valuable, but also has analyzed the mistakes that he has made.

What you need to do to get a girl: tips

Think about why you want to start a relationship with this particular girl. Is it because the girl is very beautiful? If this is a serious reason for you, then you may face some problems. After all, attractive ladies are surrounded by the attention of other men. Therefore, think carefully about whether you need this girl and a relationship with her.

  • Reciprocate the girl's feelings. The most ideal method to encourage a lady to take some serious steps is to forbid her to do so. Have fun with your girl and always be friendly. Tell your loved one that you don’t want a serious relationship either. Believe me, your lady will definitely be offended by this.
  • Show yourself to be a good friend. Friendship is what leads to a serious relationship. If you and your girlfriend have some interests that unite you, then you can invite her to spend her free time next to you.
  • If a lady claims that she does not need a serious relationship, this means that you have shown the lady your love. For many girls, this attitude can be scary. Therefore, do not show your feelings to the lady . If your beloved is ready for a relationship, she herself will offer it to you.


You can still get a girl

  • If you and your girl have more than just friendship, then you should remember about touching. Unexpected touches and hugs can lead to closer relationships. As a rule, girls in friendly relationships are capable of more than men assume.
  • Never ask a lady to become your lover. By putting a girl before such a choice, you risk losing her forever. Therefore, don’t put any limits on it. Just go for walks with her more often, enjoy such friendly relations.

Refusal is a reason to increase self-esteem4

Guys often become depressed and give up after girls refuse simply because they have low self-esteem. Refusal can become an impetus both for the development of self-doubt and for raising self-esteem. Everyone chooses what they like.

The most useful thing is to analyze your own mistakes. It is better to focus your energy on thinking about the wrong actions you have taken, so as not to repeat them in the future. There is a type of people who strive with all their might to achieve a certain goal, but as soon as they do not achieve it, they become desperate. A guy who knows how to lose won't waste his time bemoaning rejection, but rather will try again. And the one who does not know how to lose will waste all his energy on complaints and whining, often setting barriers for himself that do not allow him to act further.

Obviously, any whining person who gives up after failing to achieve what they want simply does not know how to lose with dignity. In this case, it is not even possible to call it a defeat, because life does not take away a person’s chance to try again to achieve the goal. However, loss comes when a person stops, does not analyze his mistakes and thoughts, and gives up. It is as if he gives in to difficulties, submits to them, and does not think about his erroneous actions and does not look for paths that could lead him to his desired goal.

What to do if a girl refuses: recommendations

  • Many ladies claim that they don’t need a serious relationship if they really don’t care about a man. Since it is impossible to make one person love another, then do not waste your own energy, free time and finances in vain on a lady who does not reciprocate your feelings. Try to find yourself a new object of adoration.
  • Often those ladies who were disappointed in them in the past do not want a serious relationship. Therefore, do not put pressure on the girl, do not force her to go out with you and meet. Let these feelings pass on their own.


Don't put pressure on the girl

  • In order to change a girl’s attitude towards herself, first change yourself. A successful job, a successful hobby and successful friends - this is all you need first of all. After this, your beloved will understand how wrong she was.
  • And most importantly, if a lady refuses you, perhaps she already has a boyfriend or is secretly in love with another man.

Top 8 effective ways to survive rejection

There are effective ways to cope with a girl's rejection.

Eight effective, time-tested tips have been prepared for you. They will help you survive the rejection of the girl you love. To learn from the experience, and also to succeed in subsequent novels, you should:

  • Accept reality. At first you will deny the fact that you were rejected. Wait a while, try to repeat the conversation and make sure that her decision is final. Find out the real reasons why a girl cannot or does not want to have a relationship. Admitting defeat is the first step towards healing and restoration.
  • Don't deny the pain. Allow yourself to be sad, angry or hurt. You are human and it is normal to feel pain. To understand the loss of a potential partner, feel the full range of emotions. This is the only way to free yourself from false hopes.
  • Be kind to yourself. After a refusal, you will most likely begin to doubt your own attractiveness to the opposite sex. Don't forget that this is just one girl, with her personal preferences and motives. Refusal does not mean that there is something wrong with you. No, this is just a reason to think and work on yourself. Do not engage in soul-searching and search for non-existent shortcomings. Focus on achieving inner balance.
  • Find support. Life goes on and your loved ones will probably provide you with moral support. Don’t be shy about asking for a meeting and an opportunity to talk, listen to advice, and simply share your emotions. Remember, there are always those who are ready to cover your back and lend a shoulder in difficult times.
  • Do not hurry. New dates will help take your mind off your disappointment, but it's better to focus on yourself and your needs. Healing a mental wound is difficult and can take weeks, months and even years. Sports, meditation, travel and other activities aimed at self-knowledge and improvement will help you. Dating and meeting other girls will only provide temporary relief. Without working through a negative experience, you will not be able to build trusting and lasting relationships in the future.
  • Learn a lesson. Psychotherapy sessions or just a conversation with a psychologist will be very useful. You need to discuss your experiences, look at them from different angles. Write down on paper all the pros and cons of the situation that happened to you and evaluate your notes. Another option is to write a letter to the girl, telling her in detail and honestly all the thoughts, feelings and conclusions that you have come to. You don't have to send it, but by doing so, you will feel great relief and be able to let go of the past.
  • Take a step back. After gaining inner balance, it’s time to show yourself to the world, renewed and more experienced. You may not want to come out of the cocoon you've been hiding in for so long, but do it. Pamper yourself with relaxation, shopping, communication with friends and loved ones. Regain your confidence in your own attractiveness, program yourself for success.
  • Focus on searching. Now you're ready to dive into the sea of ​​possibilities and meet someone new. After deep thought and analysis, you have a better understanding of what you need. Make a list of the qualities you are looking for in your next partner. Be specific in your wishes and prioritize correctly. And then allow yourself to be happy, give the universe a chance to make your dreams come true.

Having gone such a long way from failure to full recovery, you will gain inner strength and resilience. Know that no matter what comes your way next, you will be able to handle it.

What a guy needs to know: valuable tips

  • While you are trying to get the attention of the lady who tells you “no”, you may miss out on another girl, more sincere, who really likes you.
  • The more you talk about your feelings to a lady in the early stages of a relationship, the more desperate you seem from the outside. Believe me, such an attitude can frighten your beloved. Almost all ladies will refuse you, therefore, be a self-confident and self-sufficient person, this quality will only benefit your relationship.
  • Never fool yourself. If a lady likes to walk with you, sit in cafes and cinemas, this does not mean that you have a close relationship. Very often ladies take advantage of men, but give nothing in return.


Look at the girl's behavior

  • There are women who love to be surrounded by fans. Such ladies love attention, but they don’t need relationships at all. It's better not to waste your time on them.
  • If a girl only wants to be friends with you, then she definitely doesn't want to date you. Look around. Perhaps you are surrounded by a lot of girls. You just need to find the one that is waiting for you.

Life goes on5

If a girl decides you're not right for her, you can look at it as an experience rather than a reason to sit in your room writing existential poetry and wondering, "What's wrong with me?"

So stop lying around and put away the Nicholas Sparks movies you were planning to watch.

Yes, you were rejected, and that's not a bad thing! Look around you: there's a whole world out there for you to conquer, so go and transform yourself like Tony Stark building a stronger Iron Man after his old one was torn to pieces.

Do what interests you. If that's not enough to distract you, try setting a personal goal. The busier you are, the easier it will be for you to cope with rejection.

Rejection is a chance to rebuild and make yourself even more whole and complete for the next girl who comes your way.

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