Pickup and pickup artist: what and who it is, how to recognize it and the rules of communication


There are men who meet women not spontaneously and naturally. They use a specific technique to help achieve a specific goal. Communication templates are used - the so-called “openers” (openers). They force the girl to look carefully at the man and continue communicating with him. The goal of such a guy is to seduce a girl, “divorce” her into sex without obligation. Often a girl does not suspect that she has encountered a pick-up artist - and when she realizes that she was simply used, “conned” like a fool - disappointment and tears are inevitable.

Who is a pick-up artist and how to recognize him at the beginning of communication?

What is a pickup truck and who are pickup artists?

Pickup is a seduction technique. Thanks to the most arrogant and obsessive representatives of the pick-up artist tribe, a stereotype has already developed that a pick-up artist is a narcissistic male who collects random relationships and is immensely proud of the number of seduced women. But this, like any stereotypical opinion, is not entirely true. Often, pick-up artists are not cold-blooded scoundrels who dream of manipulating girls and invariably getting what they want, and not narcissistic peacocks trying to impress their company.

Among those who study and practice pickup techniques, there are adequate individuals who do not know how to communicate with the opposite sex in the usual ways. Pick-up artistry helps them overcome embarrassment and fears.

Do you think the purpose of pickup is intimate relationships?

Hardly. Who would sleep with a man who exhibits such stupid behavior?

33.33%

I don’t think so, but some are literally led by the manners and styles of behavior in question.

16.67%

Yes, I think that only people who want intimate intimacy behave in the manner described.

50%

Voted: 6

What does pickup mean?

Picking up means seducing and charming a member of the opposite sex. This rarely happens spontaneously; more often the pick-up artist deliberately chooses the field of his action and looks out for the “victim” in advance. The field can vary from nightclubs to social media. With live communication, picking up is much easier; there is eye contact, the ability to seduce with the help of gestures and facial expressions.

Pickup artists often pursue one ultimate goal - intimacy. Beginning pickup artists are content with a phone number. Often things don’t go further, and the man doesn’t call his “prey” back, perceiving a conversation with a representative of the opposite sex as training and honing his seduction skills.

The pickup truck has its own stages leading to the final goal

:

  • Defining the goal
    . The first thing a master of seduction does is look for a target. He chooses a stranger based on his intentions: to hone the knowledge gained in training, or to get closer to the girl and develop a relationship.
  • To attract attention
    . Then the man uses all his knowledge and skills. Everyone will work in the way that works best for them. This could be a special look, a phrase or a certain action towards the object of seduction.
  • Acquaintance
    . As soon as attention is focused on him, the man tries by all means to get the stranger’s phone number, using improvisation, charm or pre-prepared phrases.
  • Rapprochement
    . You need to get to know the girl better, this will be useful in building further relationships. Pick-up artists ask personal questions and try to listen carefully.
  • Relationships or intimacy
    . Often everything ends with intimacy, but some men pursue another goal and start a serious relationship.

The main thing in a pickup truck is the tools of seduction. They determine success or failure; their selection depends on the specific person and the pickup artist’s goals. Some representatives of the fairer sex love courtship; for others, a man’s appearance or the way he speaks plays a big role, so it is important for each pick-up artist to choose his own method and style with which he can seduce a girl.

Common myths about pickup artists

It’s a rare pretty girl who wants a serious relationship in this age of network communication and quick online dating who hasn’t encountered pick-up artists and hasn’t been disappointed. Often, because of a couple of meetings, many women develop an erroneous opinion about pick-up artistry, which supports the existence of persistent myths about this phenomenon and the men involved in it.

The most persistent and widespread myths on the topic of what constitutes an average pickup artist:

  1. This is a “mamsik” living with his parents, or a student. The guy doesn’t have enough finances, but he wants sex, so he goes out of his way, charming naive fools for sex for one night.

In reality, there are such examples, but the pick-up artist may not be a young dunce, but a fully established man of 30-40 years old. He just doesn’t want serious connections and obligations—and, accordingly, doesn’t want to spend a lot on them. Or does he ask the “most important” question: is he still able to please girls without money?

  1. The goal of a pick-up artist is only and exclusively sex. Having achieved what he wanted, he loses interest in the victim and abandons her.

Not entirely true. Usually a pick-up artist gets a sea of ​​emotions in the process of meeting and winning a girl. He likes to feel like a master of seduction - to some extent this is a creative process. The pick-up artist invents spectacular tricks, unusual compliments, unique ways (as it seems to him) to keep the girl’s attention.

  1. Pick-up artists are men who are preoccupied with sex. The lack of sex naturally drives them crazy, so they scour in search of new victims; it would be better to go to a sex therapist.

In reality, pick-up artists are really interested in sex - they are convinced that any relationship should start with it. If sex doesn’t work out, what kind of subsequent contacts with this woman can we talk about? The pick-up artist acts as if in “economy” mode: he does not want to waste days and months on unpromising communication with the opposite sex. Or he just wants to have an interesting time, but is simply not ready for a long-term relationship.

  1. The pick-up artist is a complete loser; no one wants to mess with him. This is a man with wounded pride, trying to prove to the whole world (both women and his company) that in reality he is irresistible. So he invents various ways to somehow interest girls and achieve sex: he needs to prove that he is not a loser.

Among the pick-up artists there are really a lot of creatures hung with complexes to their very ears. But often successful, established, attractive men who do not suffer from a lack of education, upbringing and finances also engage in pickup trucks.

Have you ever fallen for pickup tricks?

Yes, it happened. I didn’t know what it was then. Otherwise I wouldn't have gotten caught.

25%

Yes, but purely out of interest. It wasn’t even that she got caught, she just deliberately followed the lead.

50%

No, do I look like I'm crazy?

0%

No, I was just lucky not to meet people using technology.

25%

Voted: 4

How to quickly pick up a girl or guy

In order to attract the attention of the person you like, it is not at all necessary to attend expensive trainings. It is enough to know some phrases and techniques to help attract attention. The main thing in a fast pickup truck is originality, lightness and lack of vulgarity.

Seduction gurus advise keeping a few phrases ready that can be used in a certain situation and capture the attention of the person you like.

:

  • To meet people on the street, guys can use a similar phrase: “I’m conducting a social experiment, would you mind answering a few questions? What is your name? What is your favorite fruit? Your phone number?"
  • In rainy weather, young people can approach a wet girl without an umbrella and shelter her from the weather. And if you don’t have an umbrella, you can dive under the umbrella of the person you like.
  • For both boys and girls, you can try to veiledly ask for a phone number: “Girl (young man), do you have paper and pen? I’ll write down your number, I wouldn’t want to lose you.”
  • In most cases, you can capture the attention of the object you like with eloquence, seasoned with a dose of humor: “See that guy? His name is Petya, he is my best friend. The fact is that we argued with him, and the subject of the dispute is you. He claims that you are beautiful, I disagree with him and convince him that you are stunningly beautiful. Resolve our dispute and tell me who is wrong?
  • Girls can manipulate men with their unexpected persistence. All you have to do is go up to the guy you like and say: “Hey, handsome, what are you doing tonight?” A phrase said with a smile will discourage any young man, and he will only be glad to accompany you this evening.
  • Girls should take note of the love of the opposite sex to help weak ladies. Help can be needed anywhere, in a store you can ask a tall guy to get that jar of peas, on the street it’s enough to ask for help with heavy bags or a flat car tire. In between, ask for a phone number and say you know whose strong arms will help you next time.
  • Both the stronger and weaker sex like it when they are praised. Be it outstanding external data, personality traits, intelligence, courage, beautiful voice. Follow the person you like, choose his most outstanding feature and tell him how amazed you are by his eyes, gait, eloquence, smile.

Attracting a person of the opposite sex is not so difficult, and it is easiest for girls to do this: men like brave ladies, the first step from a girl is discouraging and the guy has no reason not to continue communication. Guys can easily achieve success, the main thing is to approach dating in an original way, with a sense of humor and the most charming smile.

Signs of a pick-up artist

If you are not satisfied with “one-time” relationships and you do not want to become a victim of manipulation, your goal is to understand in time who the pick-up artist is and to monitor some aspects of your communication:

  1. Male pick-up artists show increased attention to a woman, talk little about themselves, but are extremely “interested” in you, provoking you to be frank.

In a normal dating situation, a man and a woman share information about themselves on a mutual basis. “I work in... What about you?”, “I don’t like rap. What kind of music do you like?” The pick-up artist does not give truthful information about himself - in order to persuade you to have sex, he says what you want to hear.

  1. When communicating with a pick-up artist, it seems to you that he naturally “reads” your desires and thoughts, “perfectly understands” you. This is extremely captivating and you lose your head.

In reality, this is an illusion, he simply portrays it, he doesn’t care about your ideas, desires and dreams.

  1. The pickup artist is trying to psychologically influence you.

Pay attention to the pose (open), gaze (admiring), attempts at physical rapprochement (touching) - the pick-up artist strives for physical contact already at the first meeting, portraying admiration and tenderness.

  1. Meeting a pickup artist is usually non-standard from a verbal point of view (remember about “openers”)? The pick-up artist will not say the banal: “Girl, can I meet you?” He will give out something more unusual: “Girl, do you know how best to spend my salary?”, “Girl, tell me, does my T-shirt match my jacket?”, “You don’t draw? You have the face of a real artist!”
  2. He cares about appearance - clothes, perfume, image in general.
  3. There are no signs of uncertainty or embarrassment in his manners and behavior - “I see the goal, I see no obstacles.”
  4. If he didn’t achieve sex on the first date, then he will appoint the location of the second one himself. Probably some unusual place, but, please note, one where the man will not require significant financial expenses (the defining feature of a pick-up artist is that he does not want to pay for just communication, without sex). He may start convincing you that a date on a rooftop or on a half-sunken barge is extremely romantic. A normal guy will calmly go with a girl to a cafe, restaurant, exhibition, movie, without coming up with any excuses and without making up dates on top of a tower crane.
  5. He is touchy, like a capricious princess. He himself can use caustic jokes, but he freaks out if they “tell him back.” Don’t be surprised: many pick-up artists are truly complex individuals, devoid of self-irony. But why do you need such a FIFA in your pants?

Do you think the signs presented are objective or still subjective?

I think that the signs presented can be “attached” to any person.

25%

I think they are quite objective.

25%

I don't think they are objective. Some of it is fair. But only part.

50%

I consider them to completely and completely describe the essence of the pickup truck and its “associates”.

0%

Voted: 4

Pickup lessons for beginners

If you decide to learn pickup here and now, but the trainings and expensive lessons of a pickup guru are not for you, you can take an express course for a beginning pickup artist on your own. This will help by studying the behavior of the seducer, special tricks and entire schemes that will help you get the girl or guy of your dreams.

Pickup phrases

Many people believe that you can get any girl with one phrase. It often happens that some ladies are greedy for compliments, and some will be turned by a non-standard approach to communication.

All that is required of you is to always keep such phrases ready and be able to use them at the right time

:

  • “Are you a fashion model?” A phrase that works wonders consists of just two words and can immediately win a girl over to you. Remember to pretend that you are truly confused and dazzled by her beauty.
  • “If we were in a luxury restaurant, the waiter would already be on my way with a bottle of wine for you.” Such a phrase will tell you about the seriousness of your intentions, because you have already hinted in it about going to a restaurant.
  • "I think you're stalking me." Such an appeal will leave the lady speechless, and while she is refuting this statement, you can invite her to discuss this in a more pleasant place, for example, in a restaurant.
  • “Your eyes are incredible! I drowned in them/saw the sea/found my universe.” It is extremely advantageous to mention the features of a girl’s appearance in your seduction phrases. Of course, this must be done within reasonable limits and point to certain parts of the body. The phrase “what outstanding ears you have” is not suitable for this.

Try to generate your own phrases and don’t forget how important it is to hone your skills in front of real people, this is the only way your pick-up phrases will sound convincing.

Pickup artist tricks

Pick-up artists have special tricks that allow them to keep the attention of their “victim”. They help guys seduce a lady, and girls, knowing these techniques, will be able to immediately recognize a pick-up artist.

The most popular tricks

:

  • Doesn't call for a long time
    . Seduction gurus believe that you should not call girls right away and advise doing this three days after meeting them. This allows the girl to worry, and lets the guy know that he is a free bird and does not curry favor with the lady.
  • Confidence
    . Pick-up artists exude incredible confidence, this makes a great impression on girls and makes a man a real macho.
  • Switching attention
    . Male seducers do not push ahead; they often use an old trick that irritates women so much. Pick-up artists flirt with other girls in front of the lady they like, and all in order to attract the attention of that same one.
  • Talkativeness and promises
    . The seducer loves to talk, he promises everything possible and impossible, his goal is to charm and create a fairy tale for a woman.
  • Aura of mystery
    . Pick-up artists know how mystery attracts girls, and they take advantage of it with pleasure. Seducers ask the girl a bunch of questions, but they try to keep their personality in the shadows, and answer all counter questions with a mysterious smile.

These tricks help men charm in cases where even original phrases do not help win the girl they like.

Pick-up artist manners

The way a man behaves and looks largely determines the success of seduction.

Pick-up artists have their own rules about what a man should look like when he goes “hunting” and how he should behave with the opposite sex

:

  • Appearance
    . The calling card of any guy is his appearance. Before you say your first phrase, they will already have time to evaluate you, and if the girl doesn’t like you for some reason, no tackle will help. Therefore, in addition to preparing phrases and tricks, you need to work on your appearance. Neat clothes, well-groomed hands, hair, pleasant perfume - this distinguishes a seducer from an ordinary man.
  • Touching
    . An ordinary guy will not touch a lady in the first minutes of meeting her, but for a pick-up artist this is more of a challenge. The seducer reads fortunes on the girl’s hand, straightens a stray strand of hair, hugs her around the waist, in general, does everything to be closer to the “victim.”
  • Mirroring
    . If a person takes the same pose as ours, or repeats the end of our phrases, we subconsciously accept him as “our own.” This is what pick-up artists achieve, so they often repeat the “victim’s” folded arms, posture, and gestures.
  • Fishing for information
    . The guy needs information about the girl in order to convince her of kindred spirits. Therefore, pick-up artists try to ask more questions so that on the second date they can enthusiastically talk about how much they love Titanic or playing the piano.
  • Control of the situation
    . Pick-up artists should always be the leaders in a relationship; they never bend to the girl’s opinion and do not buy into checks from them. Being an “alpha male” is the main credo of any seducer.

True pickup gurus must have certain manners that help them manipulate a girl. Perseverance, self-confidence and a little ego are the defining traits of any pickup truck builder.

Tackling schemes

The most daring tackles are called “roof blowers” ​​by pick-up artists.

The name is not accidental; such schemes to seduce a lady are discouraging, so for pick-up artists they are one of the main weapons

:

  • Date on the roof
    . It's no secret that girls love romance and their hearts literally melt at the sight of candles in a cozy, secluded place. For such a tackle you will need the open roof of a tall house, wine, fruit, a blanket and candles. No girl can resist such a tackle.
  • Unexpected meeting
    . It is necessary to find out in advance when the girl finishes work or school and make a small ambush. It is advisable to take the girl’s favorite food or a bouquet of flowers with you and make sure that she has no plans for the evening, then the unexpected meeting on the street can continue in a more pleasant place.
  • The inscription on the asphalt
    . To some, such a tackle may seem ancient, but girls really love it. The best tool to use is candles, which you can use to lay out a message on the asphalt in front of her house. It is not at all necessary to confess your love, you can simply write “Masha, you are beautiful!” or “Sveta, I’m waiting for you!” Make sure that the girl has no plans and invite her to dinner, after such a romantic act she will not be able to refuse.

The main rule of a tackle is to surprise. The effect of surprise works well; besides, girls love attention and surprises. There are a lot of other ideas for this: a hot air balloon flight, an unexpected trip to a picnic, a bouquet ordered to her home, in general, everything that can win over the girl.

Pickup is a whole science in which some people achieve success and others fail. However, sometimes you don't need to be a pickup artist to attract the attention of a pretty girl or a nice guy. It is important not to be shy, to show originality and creativity in communication, and success with the opposite sex will be guaranteed.

How to communicate with a pickup artist?

How to drive away a pick-up artist if you have no desire to communicate with him? It's not difficult, there are correct ways:

  1. Ignoring all his attempts and antics, complete lack of emotions. Remember: he is following a script and is convinced that his technique works. If you react to him like furniture, without reacting to the flow of compliments and spectacular antics, he is lost.
  2. A sudden snarky comment helps destroy his confidence. “You’re too pushy—have you never had a girlfriend?” “Are you sure that all girls love dead flowers? I’m actually for nature conservation!”
  3. Ask a bunch of questions - be interested in his biography, work, hobbies, “ex”, mom, dad... They don’t like to talk about themselves!
  4. Offer to go to a pretentious cafe, buy you that branded handbag as a gift, or help pay for the apartment. It will merge - 100%! All the pick-up artist’s actions are aimed at preserving his finances.
  5. Do not respond to calls and messages on social networks, reschedule dates for any fictitious reasons, preferably ridiculous ones: “I promised to help my friend dye her hair,” “Sorry, but at this time I’m walking with my grandmother’s pug,” “I’m allergic to the street architecture of our city.” "...
  6. Avoid tactile contact. Coldness, indifference and even slight aversion to his touch - and it will dawn on him: he made a mistake, choosing the wrong victim.

Meaning of the word

Since many people are interested in what it means to pick up girls, you should understand the origin of the word. After all, in essence, pickup is a full-fledged science of seducing women. If you translate the term from English, you will find that it means “to remove” or “to pick up.”

From this we can draw a conclusion about the pickup master, and what this concept includes. If you want to communicate competently with women and impress them, then a pickup truck will just help you figure out which direction you should move next.

Many people, when analyzing the question of what a pickup truck is, may think that the concept is very general. After all, it includes not only the principles of seduction, but also reveals the possibilities of constant comprehensive development in various areas. After all, in order to attract the opposite sex, you need to do thorough work on yourself. Success largely depends on this.

Increasing authority among colleagues, acquaintances and friends directly affects the perception of a man by girls and women. This later helps you achieve your career goals.

If we talk about why men choose to pick up girls, it turns out that all of them pursue slightly different goals. Some simply seek to increase their self-esteem, some want to become a professional pick-up artist and seducer, while others are looking for a long-term and high-quality relationship. There are also situations when a man wants to restore a broken relationship that was of some value to him. But in any case, the ultimate goal of all options is to learn how to attract women and please them.

FAQ

What is a pickup artist afraid of?

The answer is simple and comprehensive: any responsibility for your actions. Judge for yourself. Here are the main pick-up artist fears:

  • Catch PPP disease from another partner. Visiting a veterinary clinic is unpleasant. It is humiliating to realize that you slept with a girl of the “last analysis” and was the 1001st with her.
  • Partner's pregnancy. Suddenly he starts demanding alimony or stuffs his belly into the registry office!
  • Rape charges. A pick-up artist with brains will not agree to intimacy with a girl who is in a darkened state of consciousness: drunk, on drugs. Or sleeping. And he does the right thing: sexual contact in all these cases is violence, the girl did not express consent to it. Or she expressed it while not being herself - and then has the right to accuse her partner of rape.
  • Jealous spouses and boyfriends. A competent pick-up artist, provoking you to be frank, tries in advance to prevent a situation with a scene of jealousy. Especially if he is physically much weaker than your regular partner - or is simply a coward.

Summary:
the pickup artist dreams of having sex, but not having to pay anything for it!

What is fast food in a pickup truck?

The English word "fast" means "quickly". Fast is the fastest possible seduction. If you managed to sleep with a girl immediately after the first date (more precisely, the date ended in sex) - this is fast. If there were several meetings before sexual contact, this is not fast.

What is a women's pickup truck?

The male pickup is aimed at overcoming the embarrassment, complexes and fears of a man that prevent him from making acquaintance with the woman he likes. Women's pickup also does not do without working on complexes, fears and embarrassment - and is aimed at ensuring that a woman can attract the attention of men. And the attention is active: a female pickup artist tries to look and behave in such a way that men will not just stare at her, but also try to get to know her. However, the most liberated pick-up girls themselves take the initiative in dating. It’s just that in our country this has long been considered indecent. And one more thing - male collectors are relatively rare; usually girls still strive to establish long-term relationships.

How to pick up a guy?

Many girls intuitively know how to do this or learn quickly - such advice will only do harm. But if you really don't know:

  1. Study the object (if you do not strive for completely spontaneous acquaintances and connections). Knowing a person’s name, it’s not difficult to find his social networks and find out at least a minimum of information about him. This will help him talk about what interests him.
  2. Learn to listen. Not only men - you also don’t like it when your interlocutor bursts into an endless monologue about himself and his beloved.
  3. Prepare for your first date. It is not at all necessary to appear overdressed to the point of impossibility of sitting down and eating, but an unkempt appearance, a dirty head, smudged makeup and a sloppy manicure turn off many.
  4. If a situation for dating does not arise, create it yourself: ask a man for help or advice. They love to feel strong—and authoritative. “Listen, there’s really no one else to turn to—can you help me get that little thing off the shelf? You’re so tall, I can’t reach you,” “What to do with a friend - I fell in love with Zuckerberg! Crazy, he's married! And he doesn’t live in Russia! Oh, are you an IT guy too? Tell me, how do they get to know you?”
  5. Did the date take place? Don’t be embarrassed by mistakes and incidents, no one is immune from them. If trouble happens, try to turn it into a joke. One nice girl was sitting with a guy in a cafe and... suddenly she farted quite loudly. The guy stared at her curiously. And she asked: “Why does he hate me?!” The guy was surprised: who? "Pea soup! He’s trying to ruin my best date in my life!” The guy replied that the soup would not work. They have been married for 5 years already.

And be careful with tactile contacts! A girl who constantly reaches out her hands to a man and literally “hangs herself” on him looks like a pitiful creature without self-esteem
. Watch the idiotic show “Let's Get Married” and pay attention to how other “brides” behave, especially the middle-aged ones. That's it - don't!

How to show a man's interest in you?

The advice here is meaningless. If a man is really interested in you, he will show this interest. It is important to capture these points:

  1. He takes the initiative, but at the same time listens to your opinion. If he suggests going to a restaurant, suggest going to the movies. To a melodrama or other clearly “not a man’s” film. He will go and try to watch with interest - you are important to him.
  2. He is sincerely interested in you as a person, even if you excitedly talk about a hobby that is of little interest to men.
  3. He does not hesitate to show signs of attention and care.
  4. He gives gifts - and not formal and banal ones, such as flowers and sweets. He is interested in what gift you dream of.
  5. He is looking for meetings with you, without citing being busy and tired, so as not to go on a date.

But the main sign of a man’s real, genuine interest in you is his prioritization. Does he prefer to drink with friends and have stupid conversations? And not spend time with you? He needs you for status or to wash his socks. But they are not important and not close as a person.

How to attract a guy using gestures?

There are 8 feminine gestures that invariably attract the attention of guys. It starts up when she:

  • shakes her hair - this movement is mesmerizing, especially if the hair is long and voluminous. However, it also looks impressive with short haircuts - if the hair is not 1 cm long;
  • shows off his wrists. They are considered - and for many they are - an erogenous zone. Women's wrists are thin, fragile, graceful compared to men's, and showing them is a sure way to draw men's attention to beautiful, well-groomed hands;
  • spreads his legs wider than usual - no matter standing or sitting. But the defensive pose is crossed, tightly clenched legs; love does not shine with such a lady;
  • sways his hips while walking or even standing - this is an openly inviting, erotic micro-movement, a non-verbal request “Rate my figure”;
  • plays with hair - twirls a curl or strand of hair around a finger;
  • slightly opens his mouth - this, frankly speaking, is a symbolic allusion to the female genital organs and the state of sexual arousal;
  • strokes an object in the shape of a cylinder - the stem of a glass, a cigarette, a bottle neck. A woman may not even realize that she is making this gesture - this is the work of the subconscious, a veiled signal about the sexual attraction she is experiencing;
  • looks sideways over his raised shoulder. Psychologists believe that a rounded and slightly raised shoulder is an imitation of a chest.

What do they teach in pickup truck courses?

Pick-up coaches like to claim that they help guys overcome their insecurities, learn how to meet people and make long-term connections. But this is a public lie. In reality, they teach: sexual relations are just a game. But its rules are determined exclusively by the pick-up artist, and not by the victim.

Recognition principle

When people wonder how to understand “pick-up” or how to recognize a pick-up artist, it is worth understanding the presence of a certain set of principles in the behavior. Let me take a closer look:

  • Spectacular launch launch

    Of course, from the very beginning of his future acquaintance with a woman, such a man does not use standard phrases. For this reason, imagination and the number of options for a successful start are very wide here. Any man, when he sees a girl he likes, always understands that he is not the only one who is a contender for her attention. For this reason, he follows the principle that he wants to immediately be remembered vividly in her memory. In this regard, it is important to present yourself competently.

  • Confidence
    Just don't confuse self-confidence with self-confidence. After all, everything should be in moderation, and not in excess. Almost every woman knows that most men become timid at the sight of an attractive person. Just by behavior alone, you can notice how a person begins to be afraid to say a word out of place. But the pick-up artist is his complete opposite. He behaves calmly, is not afraid to look the girl straight in the eyes, and at the very first stages he tries to make tactile contact. Simple touches work here, like straightening your hair, holding your hand, etc. That is, when meeting such a man, the opposite sex has no opportunity to doubt his confidence in his attractiveness.
  • Fewer or more questions
    Pick-up in communication implies a lot of questions that pick-up artists ask. That is, the more information they receive, the more practical benefits they will have in the future. Moreover, girls, like all people, are given the idea that they are interesting. If a man tries to talk too much about himself, it seems that he is showing off. This is not a good approach.
  • Bright date
    Recognizing pick-up artists is simple and according to the rules they use during dates. In most cases, the number of meetings before sex does not exceed three dates. In this case, the acquaintance itself is considered the first. And we should not exclude situations in which serious financial costs are possible. But the main rule is the desire to surprise and discourage. That is, the use of a non-standard place and even the use of female phobias such as fear of heights is applicable here.
  • Principles of Intrigue Intriguing a potential pickup partner in a relationship is extremely important. Such men at the beginning make a good start in terms of courtship, and then suddenly disappear, as if they had forgotten. At such moments, it seems to women that the person they liked, who is already worth it to them, has simply lost interest in them. This increases the value of the relationship. Silence for several days often contributes to what it means to “pick up” professionally, as women become much more supportive after such “downtime.”

Sign up for my trainings if you want to create a relationship of any type (one-night stand or long-term relationship). Follow the link and order ->

How to protect yourself from a pick-up artist?

As practice suggests, if it seems to you that something is going wrong, then it doesn’t seem to you. If you begin to suspect that your interlocutor is sweet and charming not only because he liked you, but also because his entire conversation desperately boils down to just sleeping with you, leave. If you are already at the stage where you can’t just get up and leave, keep the situation under control. Don't let a man go beyond what is permitted and violate your boundaries. Eliminate all touching and attempts to get closer.

When a man feels that you suspect something is wrong and are not succumbing to his manipulation, he will try to convince you otherwise.

The pick-up artist behaves according to the standard scenario: he will try to mislead you, say that you are just tired, and his communication is not at all persistence and flirting, but he simply likes you very much, so it is difficult for him to control his behavior. The man will begin to insist on moving to a more secluded place, for example: going to his house for tea or offering to watch a movie with a glass of wine.

When a pick-up artist feels that you are not taking his bait, he will take drastic measures, because he is already at the limit and will not be able to let you go until he achieves his goal.

If you feel psychological pressure from a man, notice that he is too assertive, directly say that you have seen through him. This will not only hurt his ego as a man, but will also put him into a state of stupor. After all, how can it be, he is an experienced pick-up artist, but he was abandoned, this is unthinkable!

In this situation, you will come out the winner, not him.


how to communicate with a pickup artist

Main signs of pick-up dating

Pick-up artists often start dating with some unusual question. For example: “Excuse me, girl, what flowers do you prefer?” or “Girl, how long do you think it will take to fly from Alaska to Thailand?” Moreover, the question is asked in such a light and relaxed tone that it seems to you as if this guy is all charm and spontaneity. In fact, he is just well trained. And he rehearsed his question on the 101st girl.

For an ordinary guy, giving a compliment to a girl he doesn’t know well is quite a feat. And for a pickup artist it’s a piece of cake. He has practiced these compliments, so he is able to generously shower you with them from the first seconds of meeting you. The pick-up artist’s favorite technique: an ambiguous or half-joking compliment.

In the world of ordinary guys, everything is not like that: the more you like a girl, the more difficult and scary it is to approach her. This means that a normal man can be shy, timid, or, conversely, cover up his awkwardness with demonstrative bravado. In the world of pick-up artists, any girl is taken on board under the motto: “I see the target, I don’t see any obstacles, I’m going to the target”! That’s why they get to know each other and give compliments easily and naturally.

Erotic capital

Among young people in the United States and, increasingly, in Russia, the culture of dating is gradually giving way to the practice of casual relationships. An invitation to a date is an element among other elements of courtship, the final of which is a wedding or at least cohabitation. Casual relationships are valuable in themselves, do not require anything “later”, and sexual contact in them is more important than romantic attachment. In such contacts there are no obligations, but there is free initiative. Plus, alcohol acts as a social lubricant: alcohol promotes spontaneity and takes away responsibility.

The extent to which casual relationships have become popular and even mandatory, replacing traditional serious courtship, contributes to inequality among young people. Only a few of them have erotic capital—a special form of capital consisting of attractiveness, communication skills, and sexual experience. Like other forms of capital, it can be acquired, developed and improved.

Geeks, aka “nerds,” find themselves in a paradoxical position. Their passion for information technology guarantees them a good place in the modern job market, not to mention the fashionability of their occupation. But at the same time, their classmates ridicule them for their inability to communicate, their unkempt and unathletic appearance, and their inability to easily and naturally win girls. This gap between high economic and social capital and low erotic capital is what pickup technology is trying to mitigate, scientists say.

Flexibility and persistence

When a woman says “no,” it even arouses more interest in the pickup artist, because it spurs him on. For him, it is an achievement to get that woman who at first thought that “this is not my type of man at all,” “I’m not interested in him at all.” She refused him, but that didn't stop him.

Unfortunately, many women fall for this. It seems to them that: “He needs me so much, that’s why he’s so persistent.” In my opinion, all these techniques only work with psychologically immature individuals. Because if you are a mature person, you will not be attracted to such masculine behavior.

If it is important for you to understand the psychology of men, then I invite you to a free course: “Man: honest instructions for use. No drama or manipulation."

Let's go deeper into history

The pickup truck, like most strange ideas, originates from the West. Back in 1992, a book on pickup, “How to Get the Girl of Your Dreams into Bed,” authored by Ross Jeffries, was published. As can be seen from the name itself, adherents of this ideology believe that a woman is no more valuable than an ordinary thing, which simply needs to be found in the right way, used and finally disposed of.

And since this is simply an object to satisfy sexual desires and needs, you can use any means to seduce her. The author of the book was not against the use of various manipulative and often immoral tactics, while openly admitting their dishonesty.

In his opinion, absolutely any man can achieve success with the opposite sex if he knows which sore spots to press.

Further, in 2005, a new book on pickup trucks, “The Mystery Method,” authored by Eric Von Markowicz, was published in America. This book has become more humane and morally acceptable in comparison with Jeffreys' book. Markovik takes a more moral position in relations with women. His books contain neither manipulative techniques nor calls to achieve a goal by any means.

Essentially, his method boils down to the fact that a man needs to be more confident in himself and strive for self-improvement. Moreover, according to Markovik, getting a girl into bed and leaving her immediately after that is, at the very least, unethical. To a greater extent, pickup according to this method serves to find your soul mate, and not just to sleep in order to assert yourself.

Removal methods

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Psychologist Natalya Tolstaya noted that male and female approaches to dating are fundamentally different. In a certain sense, this is the development of a social model of behavior in the game.

— A man relies on self-confidence, coolness, and infallibility. He will only talk about what the woman wants to hear. One awkward step for him is tantamount to failure, and this is his weakness, ” the psychologist explained. For women it’s the other way around: the fair sex loves to play down the weak. For example, she buys a bottle of soda, pretends that she cannot open it, approaches him, and asks for help. He shrugs and opens it. She can also spill a drink on him by accident, then apologize - contact is established. Another option is to “accidentally” collide and drop some item of clothing.

Maybe I'll be with you

The next sign of a male pickup artist is a type of behavior called “prize model.” He implicitly demonstrates his relevance. The pick-up artist tells stories about friends, about some situations that indirectly indicate his popularity among women and in society. In these stories, he describes how his friends consider him a leader, he is admired by women, his employers fight for him, and his employees emulate him.

“Prize model” or “alpha maleness” - I’m all so cool. Women use this tool on Instagram: “here, look, they give me such bouquets of flowers,” “here, look, they take me to such countries, across such seas and oceans.” This way they expect other men to try hard for them too.

Pick-up artists are also taught this manipulation. Often this turns out to be a lie, it is embellishment, exaggeration and hyperbolization. If we talk about the example with flowers, then, probably, a woman is really given these flowers if she shows it on Instagram. But when a man brags about knowing someone, when he is proud that he knows someone, that someone is contacting him, then more often he exaggerates his importance.

Saying directly that “I want you to think I’m cool” is weird, but telling a story in which you look like a hero works well.

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