Single woman after 30: how not to worry about age and start living ⇒ Blog of Yaroslav Samoilov

It seems to young girls that after 30 years of age, life begins to rapidly slide towards sunset. Many people believe that by this age a woman should be married, raise children, and have a career. And if something doesn’t work out, public opinion labels you a loser. “Single woman after 30” sounds like a death sentence. But forty-year-old ladies have a different point of view. They claim that after 30 years of age, life is just beginning. And the thirty-year mark is the line beyond which new victories, interesting meetings, and strong feelings await a woman. In this article we will talk about what single women want after 30 and how to meet a decent man at this age.
From this article you will learn:

Why are so many women single after 30?
Why is female loneliness dangerous?
What myths and stereotypes are shrouded in the topic of relationships after 30?
How mature women can get married at 30+
What films will help cheer you up and lift your spirits if you're lonely?

Why is a woman single after 30?

Why do many women by the age of 30 have not yet met their man? In fact, everything is very simple. Bright and interesting ladies attract the attention of the opposite sex. But there is another category of women - their attractiveness is revealed during communication. Don't be upset if you don't often catch the admiring glances of men. This means you belong to the second type. Take it easy. Now that you know your advantage, all that's left to do is take advantage of it.

It happens that after an unsuccessful relationship and a painful breakup, a girl becomes disappointed in men for a long time. Some single women over 30 have already experienced several serious romances by this age that did not lead to marriage. In such situations, a woman wants to understand herself and her life priorities. Those around her on a subconscious level pick up on this attitude, and men are in no hurry to “convince” her.

We will talk about those single women over 30 who have never been married or have a long-term serious relationship. Some of them only remember their first touching love, which ended long ago, and since then their personal life has not been going well. It even becomes insulting when a homely classmate goes to the registry office for the third time, and everyone says about you: “Clever, beautiful, economical, educated, appreciated at work, but still alone. And where do men look?”

There is no need to reassure yourself with another myth that men are afraid of very beautiful and smart girls. Maybe a divorced 50-year-old alimony worker needs a simpler wife, because there’s no line behind him either. But successful, ambitious men want the best. And if you, having a lot of advantages, are still free, then it’s time to understand the reasons for your loneliness:

You have high self-esteem.
Often girls with a standard appearance consider themselves the standard of beauty and look down on everyone. And women who graduated from two institutes confuse erudition with outstanding mental abilities. Each of us at least once in our lives has met a pretty, but not particularly beautiful, well-read and lonely woman after 30. She stands firmly on the pedestal created by her self-esteem, and is sincerely perplexed why “princes” do not claim her hand and heart. You look at her and think: “pretty, but there is coldness in her eyes, a forced smile. You listen to her reasoning, and the illusion of high mental abilities dissipates.”
You can't be seen.
Being visible does not mean being more active towards men. They usually say about such single women: “She’s ordinary. There’s no flair to it.” Beauty fades if a girl does not have a strong personality or charisma. Yes, men will notice an attractive, tastefully dressed, impeccably combed woman. But after meeting each other and a couple of dates, for some reason they retreat or enter into dubious relationships. Why does this happen? The point is that they don't see you as a person. For them, you are just one of many. How can you be different from others? Many single women after 30 travel, do fitness and yoga, enjoy reading or photography, and cook delicious food. But only a few can talk about this with sparkling eyes, make the soul of the interlocutor tremble, arouse in a man genuine interest and a desire to be near. You can travel out of boredom, get into yoga to slim your figure, read out of boredom, but these are not true hobbies. What is your originality and charm? Can you interest another person in your hobby so much that they want to get to know you better?

Of course, a man is not obliged to share your hobbies, but he will definitely notice the fire burning inside you. A woman without interests resembles a beautiful, cold statue - pleasing to the eye, but not captivating. Inner emptiness is forgivable for young girls aged 18-25, but the personal immaturity of a single woman over 30 is alarming.
You can bet that married simpletons often don't even have hobbies. Maybe they don’t have many bright interests, but their eyes sparkle from communication, from the opportunity to meet new people, from the happiness of simply living and feeding the inner energy of those around them. And many single women after 30 strive for self-development, come up with new activities for themselves, but in their eyes there is melancholy and hopelessness, next to them it is cold and boring.
You are "prickly".
Often, after a failure in her personal life, a girl develops a “protective shell.” Sometimes you don't realize it yourself, so you can't control it. If you read the statuses of single women after 30 on social networks, you will notice the irony about marriage and marriage. When a person experiences an acute lack of something, he tries to compensate for it or convince himself of the uselessness of what he wants. There is no happiness - but there is no suffering, no joy - but there is no pain and shock. People do not always understand the reason for the changes that have happened to you, but they feel the emotional mood and state of mind. When someone reads a status like this or hears an ironic statement about men and marriage, they immediately identify your problem area. But not everyone is ready to solve other people's problems.
It turns out to be a vicious circle - the more worried and nervous you are, the less opportunities you have to improve your personal life. Who said you have to be in a couple? Nothing bad will happen if you live without a relationship for some time. Treat your single life calmly, control your emotions and inner mood, do not try to “jump into the last car” at any cost. It’s better to write in the status “I’m actively searching” than to be sarcastic about marriage. Remember that “prickly” messages have negative energy.
You have stopped developing.
Society plays a big role in shaping personality. Most people can only realize themselves in relationships. The standard of living is indicated by the generations of our ancestors. A stereotype is often imposed on girls: at the age of 22 she graduated from college and got married, by the age of 25 she gave birth to her first child, by the age of 30 she already has two children, then the children go to school, grow up, and meanwhile their parents grow old. Everything goes as if on a well-established track, without falling behind schedule. A woman feels calm: she is needed and loved, she has a goal in life, and priorities and values change depending on the new stage of life. It’s more difficult if a girl is “not settled” by the age of 30. Her life often looks boring and worthless. She does not feel the end of one time period and the beginning of another. Many single women after 30 are “stuck” in the past. Their priorities and values hardly change. Men feel this, it scares and repels them.

Why is it easier for those who have already been married to find a new husband than for those who have never been married? The answer is simple: stop focusing on your unsettled personal life, engage in soul-searching and self-development, analyze past relationships, and look for universal advice. Just relax and live your normal life. Climb out of your hardened inner shell and see the world with new eyes. Be yourself. People get married at 30 and even 40, but only mature individuals, not eternal girls.
In order to withstand competition in the “bride market,” single women after 30 often direct all their energy to maintaining external appearance, forgetting about inner beauty. Don’t dwell on the passing years, but rather pay attention to how married women your age behave.
What can you give a man?
Girls usually answer this question: “He is a man, so he must give me something” or “I will give him love, fidelity, care, comfort, my beauty and body.” The first statement is immediately repulsive. It’s unlikely that anyone will like a “one-sided game.” Single women over 30 don’t always understand this. A man can buy sex for money or get it for free; he doesn’t have to get married for this. Some girls are perplexed: “Why does he, who is so wonderful, only use me for sex and not ask me to marry?” The answer is simple - what else can you give him?

The second statement is a little more complicated. Love, loyalty, comfort are needed in any relationship, but no one chooses a partner just because he needs care. This all comes later, with the formation of a family. Before marriage, a man is usually not single. Close people give him love, and his mother takes care of his comfort. Why does he need another mother? How will your care be better than your mother's?
A single woman after 30 can easily meet a man. But how do you need to act so that the relationship develops into marriage? Imagine inviting your new crush to your home. The apartment is a reflection of the habits and lifestyle of the owner. What in your lifestyle could interest a self-sufficient man to such an extent that he would want to come here again or stay here forever? In this case, we are not considering gigolos. It's stupid to rely only on sex and good looks. Over time, we get used to our partner’s external characteristics, and sex will lose its novelty effect within a couple of months. If you can answer the question posed, then you are on the path to success.
Who are you really?
We often hear the phrase “be yourself.” What does it really mean? Most often, it is perceived as the need to demonstrate to others not only one’s strengths, but also one’s shortcomings. At the same time, a man must love you for who you are - with all the weaknesses that you cannot refuse. Are you capable of loving another person in spite of something? It is very difficult. Therefore, you should at least try to change everything that prevents you from building a relationship. “Being yourself” means clearly understanding who you really are. Single women after 30 often plunge into soul-searching. They attribute failures in their personal lives to their failure to meet certain standards: they are not active enough, they are too smart, they are too shy, they have not mastered certain skills. Having made similar conclusions for herself, a lonely lady begins to follow some book rules, articles in fashion magazines, advice from friends.
Everything read and heard turns into a vinaigrette, behind which personal individuality is lost. As a result, a single woman constantly plays a role imposed by someone - she changes her style and wardrobe, tries to pretend to be a bitch, is overly active, and adapts to her partner. All this looks very unnatural and sometimes annoying. As a result, disappointment sets in and new complexes appear.
Listen to yourself, study your interests, determine your comfort zone. Take any advice with caution. First, consider whether this is right for you personally. To get rid of stereotypes, psychologists recommend performing a small ritual. On a blank piece of paper, write the word “rules”, and then tear the piece of paper into small pieces and burn it. From now on, you decide to follow only what is convenient for you.
Each quality product is in certain demand. Every single woman after 30 has a chance to be married if she patiently follows her own path. Don't try to be like someone else. You can do whatever you want, just be natural and confident.
Do you really want a serious relationship?
Think carefully about whether you really want a serious relationship and whether you are afraid of disappointment. Perhaps public opinion is pressing on you. First figure out for yourself whether you want to get married. It is hardly possible to improve your personal life and get results if you repel men on a subconscious level. Leave all negative experiences in the past. You need to start any relationship calmly, with a clear consciousness and understanding of what you expect from them.
You are obsessive, dependent and cling to a man with a death grip.
From the first days or even minutes of meeting you, you fall in love without looking back. At first, a strong feeling gives a certain effect. A man likes sincere, genuine interest in his person. Under the pressure of your feelings and emotions, he does not have time to analyze his feelings and gets carried away. But after a while, the euphoria passes, and your chosen one begins to experience inner emptiness. He increasingly does not answer phone calls, citing being busy. You can only wonder: “he loved me so much, he couldn’t live without me, he made plans, and our sex was so passionate!” What really happened? But there was nothing except a short-term clouding of consciousness. Now that the passion has disappeared, the partner has moved away.
Why do men avoid explanations in such cases? There may be various reasons for this. For example, he himself has not yet figured out his feelings and decided to take a time out. If he needs you, he will return, and if not, he will quietly and forever disappear from your life.
You are not interested in men.
Many single women over 30 perceive a man as an attachment to their person - as long as there is one. He must look after, pay attention, love, support, care and definitely want a child. Such ladies are essentially not interested in the man himself, his life, thoughts and desires. Therefore, either show interest in the life of your new acquaintance, or be content with what you have. A partner is, first of all, a person; it should be interesting and exciting to be with him, otherwise nothing will work out. You may not share some of his interests and views on life, but you must be aware.
You quickly relax.
You get ahead of events and quickly relax. 2-3 months after meeting, you declare yourself a couple, and consider him the groom. Is he really ready to marry you? Perhaps it's just a fun way to pass the time. It should be remembered that you are no longer a schoolgirl, and he is not a classmate whom, after several trips to the movies together, you can declare “your boyfriend.” In adult life everything is much more complicated.

Start exercising regularly

Find time to exercise. You will thank yourself in the future. After 35 years, muscle loss begins, and due to a slowdown in metabolism, several extra pounds will appear. This is why it is especially important to start training early.

Try to move as much as possible. It doesn’t matter what you do: walking, jogging, hiking, swimming or weightlifting. The main thing is to study. Choose exactly the type of physical activity that you really enjoy: you are less likely to quit halfway through.

What single women over 30 worry about

Many single representatives of the fair sex believe that happiness only lies in family life. Marriage becomes their main goal, and their minds are controlled by stereotypes.

After 30 it is not easy to find a husband.

Some single women over 30 are convinced that it is not easy to get married at this age. They have only one choice - to agree to marry the one who proposes first, just so as not to remain lonely.

But do not despair and go to extreme measures. If you haven't found your soulmate before the age of 30, then what's stopping you from meeting her later? In European countries, few people get married before they are thirty, which is why there are fewer divorces there. Usually, by the onset of this age stage, people try to get firmly on their feet and prepare financially. It is important to put aside youthful maximalism and understand that youth does not end at 30. But life experience will only benefit you.

Over the age of 30, pregnancy occurs with complications.

After reading various articles, many single women over 30 believe that at this age it is not easy to give birth to a healthy child. Even worse, the family may have problems having children.

Theoretically, of course, it is better to give birth to your first child before the age of 30. A young body copes with the load more easily. But is a young girl always psychologically ready to become a mother? First she needs to graduate from college, then find a good job. But after 30 years, a self-sufficient woman can already take on such a serious responsibility as motherhood. A healthy female body, even after 30 years, can easily cope with the birth of a baby.

All single men have been dealt with.

One of the prevailing stereotypes is that all good guys are already married. It’s stupid to say that all worthy guys have already found a mate by a certain age. You cannot guarantee that at the age of 20 you will meet exactly “your” man or get married at 22, and by 30 you will not be left alone. In their youth, many people get married out of stupidity. But if a person starts a family at a more mature age, then he understands well how serious such a step is.

Single women over 30 want to meet men who are committed to starting a family. They are able to determine who a man really is, evaluate his achievements and personal qualities. At an earlier age, this is more difficult to do, since a man under 30 has not yet achieved much in life. And if at 19 - 20 years old all the guys are handsome and unmarried, then after 30 years it is not the quantity or external charm of potential suitors that is important, but the quality - what exactly they are like. Therefore, do not sit within four walls, communicate, get acquainted, travel, and one fine day you will find your happiness.

Men are afraid of single women over 30.

There is another opinion - men only like young girls, and age over 30 scares them, even if the lady looks great and has an angelic character. This is complete nonsense. For an intelligent man, the age of the chosen one is not an obstacle. If he really likes a woman, he doesn’t even think about her age. But you don’t need a morally immature partner.

After 30, a woman gets used to being alone.

A single woman after 30 gets used to her life; it is difficult for her to change the views and habits of a bachelor. She feels quite comfortable and does not want to wash men's socks, cook dinners, or deny herself pleasures. Maybe someone really thinks so. We are the builders of our own lives. But if you personally want to become a happy wife and caring mother, then you should not deny yourself this joy because of prejudices. You don't have to cater to public opinion. All in your hands.

Forgive yourself mistakes

Chances are, you did a lot of stupid things in your 20s and teen years. Everyone makes mistakes. But now you're 30, and it's time to think about and forgive yourself for all these mistakes. People who engage in self-analysis see their weaknesses and try to avoid similar mistakes in the future.

Learn from your mistakes, forgive them and move on. Don't dwell on past mistakes.

Psychologists say that the ability to forgive yourself and learn from your mistakes is a key factor in achieving success in anything.

How to get married after 30 years

What should a single woman do after 30 so that dating develops into a happy marriage? If you want to meet your soul mate, follow these simple rules:

Believe in yourself.

A person who is confident in his goal attracts good luck. Your positive attitude is the main key to success. Get rid of all complexes and doubts, believe in yourself and your future. A complex girl with low self-esteem will never get married. Don’t think that you are a worthless, lonely woman after 30. Psychology, as a science that studies the patterns of various spheres of human activity, has proven that others see us the way we perceive ourselves. Therefore, it often happens that a not very attractive, but confident lady is very popular among men, while a complex beauty remains lonely.

Take care and look after yourself.

Men pay attention to attractive ladies. With the possibilities of modern cosmetology, you can remain young and beautiful for a long time. Don't skimp on yourself, take care of your appearance. Each representative of the fair sex is beautiful in her own way, you just need to learn to emphasize your own merits.

Be active.

A rolling stone gathers no moss. Don't be passive, actively meet new people. You can spend your whole life waiting for the “prince,” and at this time your friends, one after another, are getting married for the second time.

Refuse inflated requests.

High standards in relationships and unrealistic demands - this is often the sin of single women after 30. How to live with a person who expects perfection in everything from a partner. Such a lady believes that only a handsome, tall, generous, educated millionaire, without bad habits, a gentle lover, a good father, a wonderful family man, is worthy of her... Take off your rose-colored glasses and look at life realistically. There are no perfect people.

Take every chance.

Don't follow stupid stereotypes and don't give up on real dating. Many people consider dating sites to be something shameful and indecent. Single girls are embarrassed that someone they know will see their profile. There is nothing wrong. Consider dating sites and social networks as a modern way of communication.

Strive not only for marriage, but also for self-realization in your career.

Men like self-sufficient ladies. Those who have no education, career, or job are unlikely to interest any person for long. Get busy improving your achievements.

Don't give up on the prospect of marrying a foreigner.

Foreigners like brides from Russia. They consider them beautiful, thrifty and caring. Having children is also not an obstacle for foreigners. A high standard of living plays a significant role here.

Watch a video about how to marry a decent foreigner:

Single women after 30 have a good chance of creating a strong family. At this age, an experienced and wise woman already knows herself well, understands what she wants from a man, and knows how to set priorities correctly. Don't give up, go forward, engage in self-development, and you will definitely meet your destiny.

Take care of your personal life

Happiness, success, joy largely depend on how your personal life develops. So if you want to get married, have kids, or buy a house, your 30s are the right time to achieve those goals. Ask yourself what you can do in a year from now to build the personal life you dream of. And don't hesitate. Putting off family life or children is unwise. If you want kids, have them now before it's too late.

Blogger Mark Manson has a good point about this:

You do not have time. You do not have money. First you need to build a career. They are the end of your measured life... Oh, shut up already. Children are great. They make you better. They make you happier. Don't put them off until later.

Mark Manson

Some statistics about women after 30 years

According to surveys, many single women over 30 live in big cities. About 35% of women in this age category do not have a husband or partner. Moreover, a third of these women have never been married.

Single men of a similar age category find it easier to find a wife, since there are 2.5 brides for every potential groom. It should be borne in mind that not all single men may be interested in one or another lady.

But don't get upset ahead of time. Statistics are just numbers. If we analyze the situation from the other side, we can see that thousands of women get married again after a divorce, and even having children is not a hindrance to this. So a single woman after 30 always has the opportunity to meet her future husband. Remember that your happiness is only in your hands.

Do a job that you really enjoy

Thirty is also a great time to explore other areas, change careers, and get better at your current passion, be it music, writing, or business. There's nothing worse than putting down roots in a job you hate, forcing yourself to live that life, and not being able to pursue your true passion. This situation can be described by the economic term “sunk costs”, when you have to continue investing in something because you have already invested too much in it. It is the cause of many failed careers, failed businesses and many unhappy lives.

Find a job that you really love, where your desires coincide with your skills, where you will get the greatest return.

Steve Jobs once said:

Your work will fill most of your life, and the only way to be completely satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great things is to love what you do.

Steve Jobs

The best selection of films for women 30+ about how life will still bring surprises

This best selection of films about amazing representatives of the fair sex and their incredible adventures on the path to happiness will help single women after 30 gain confidence in the future.

Eat Pray Love.

The film is an adaptation of the autobiographical story of writer Elizabeth Gilbert. Traveling around the world gives a single woman the opportunity to find answers to all her questions and experience pleasure, religion and love.

Simple difficulties.

An excellent motivational film for single mature women. 10 years have passed since the main character’s divorce, but she does not despair and again discovers the ability to love.

Frozen from Miami

. This is a fascinating story about a brave southern woman who managed to survive in the unfavorable conditions of the north, learn to get along with people and make a business revolution. The film will be of interest to single women over 30, whose career comes first.

Coco before Chanel.

The film shows the life path of an extraordinary creative personality who, with her work and charm, was able to pave the way to freedom. The inimitable Coco Chanel became famous and proved that any obstacle can be overcome.

Mona Lisa Smile

. A fascinating film about a college teacher with an independent and assertive character. She values inner freedom and teaches her students the art of living with their own minds and having their own opinions under any circumstances.

Chocolate.

The story of how a lonely, enterprising woman tries to satisfy her deepest desires. And even despite the condemnation of others, she was able to maintain kindness and humanity in her heart.

The Devil Wears Prada.

The two women have strong characters and a multifaceted inner world. They defend their value system and achieve a lot in life. The film will be interesting to those who do not give up and always strive for success.

Frida.

The story about the difficult fate of women once again proves that love, career, happiness are available to everyone. The heroine of the film, even after surviving a serious accident, was able to return to a full life and realize her creative plans.

Amelie.

A film about the best female qualities - kindness and the desire to come to the aid of one's neighbor. As a reward for spiritual generosity and purity, fate gives the lonely heroine a meeting with love.

Breakfast at Tiffany's.

The main character is trying to cope with black melancholy and find her way in life. She looks rather frivolous and has a questionable income. On each date, the girl asks the men for $50 to use the ladies' room. This film would be good to watch for single girls who dream of getting a wealthy man as their husband.

Bridget Jones's Diary

: All parts. The best film about the woman living in every representative of the fair sex. We all sometimes do unreasonable things and hope for the best.

Brooklyn.

The film tells the story of an emigrant from an Irish village who went to America in search of work. On her way, a lonely girl encounters many difficulties. The heroine in love must make a choice, but it is not easy for her.

Little women.

The film tells the story of how four sisters from the American outback grow up and transform from girls into women. It is interesting to follow the development of the plot - to find out what the heroines dream of, to experience first love and disappointments with them, to watch the formation of their worldview. Many single women over 30 will find this film useful and close.

Play like Beckham.

A film about the most beautiful football player who, despite all the obstacles, goes towards her goal. This story inspires confidence and proves that any dream can come true.

Gorgeous.

This movie can be watched over and over again. The story of an extraordinary girl who was able to prove that love changes everything, and a fairy tale turns into reality.

A girl without complexes.

A pretty, but reckless, lonely girl has a free outlook on life, she doesn’t date the same guy twice, but in her heart she dreams of meeting great love.

Everyone is crazy about Mary.

The heroine of the film is a positive girl. She has a unique gift to charm men. But it’s not easy for her to find her soul mate among a large number of fans. Mary's behavior can become an example for many single women after 30.

Diana: A love story.

All girls dream of becoming princesses. Diana is the most popular woman of her time. She was able to win the hearts of millions. This film will make you look at the world in a new way.

Princess of Monaco.

Single women over 30 should definitely watch this biographical film. Successful Hollywood actress Grace Kelly will have to make a difficult choice and become the Princess of Monaco. The sophisticated beauty has incredible wisdom and the ability for self-development.

Couture Revenge/The Dressmaker.

The story of another strong and wise woman with a difficult fate. She finds the strength to free herself from the pain and insults inflicted in childhood.

Age of Adaline

. We all strive to prolong our youth, but sometimes it becomes an obstacle to happiness. The heroine of the film, endowed with the gift of immortality, has to make a difficult choice between love and lonely eternal youth.

Gone With the Wind.

The film is about a very smart and strong lady who knows how to cope with any ups and downs of fate. Scarlett O'Hara is an American national heroine. Single girls should learn from this lady with an unbending character.

Thank you for reading this article to the end.

Hello, my name is Yaroslav Samoilov. I am an expert in the psychology of relationships and over the years of practice I have helped more than 10,000 girls meet worthy soul mates, build harmonious relationships and return love and understanding to families that were on the verge of divorce.
More than anything, I am inspired by the happy eyes of students who meet the people of their dreams and enjoy a truly vibrant life.
My goal is to show women a way to develop relationships that will help them create a synergy of success and happiness!

Call your parents more often

Most 30-year-olds spend all their time busy with family matters, their own careers, and in this cycle they forget to maintain relationships with their parents.

Remember that your parents are also getting older and that they are not forever. If you don’t take enough care of them, then there may not be such an opportunity and you will regret it.

Call your parents regularly. Just to find out how you are doing and let them know you're okay. This will support their mental and emotional well-being and make your relationship warmer and stronger. Visit them whenever possible.

Start saving money. Even if just a little bit

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“Start saving and saving money little by little. I know it's a corny, boring and uninteresting proposal, but it's worth it,” writes user Cliff Gilly. “Most thirty-year-olds always have enough money to save a little and use later. The sooner you get into this habit, the easier it will be in the future.”

Learn to be content with what you have

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“Happiness is much more important than success and recognition,” writes Robert Walker. - If you are content with what you have, you may not end your life as a millionaire, but you will almost certainly live it as a happy person. And if you do manage to become rich - why not - then you will be both rich and happy, and that’s absolutely great.”

The best is behind us

The brain takes our wording literally. “Everything” means “everything at all.” There is emptiness ahead. Nothing good awaits me anymore.

Of course, such a prospect is scary. The main thing is to realize in time that it is not something that has gone wrong with our lives. It’s just that cognitive distortions have infiltrated our reasoning and are now ruining our mood.

Any formulations that describe reality on an all-or-nothing basis are an indicator of dichotomous, black-and-white thinking.

In this case, our assessments are polar: either terrible or perfect. And since the ideal is unattainable, the assessment is always negative.

In fact, in almost every situation there is a “middle” option. It can be easily detected by using the cognitive continuum and expressing this or that quality as a percentage. This scale allows you to see that any condition definitely has degrees of gradation.

Another cognitive bias to watch out for is overgeneralization. There is some truth in your statement: some things are really behind us. But what does “best” mean? And why exactly “everything”? What is the basis for the assumption that nothing good will happen again?

Keep enjoying life

Don't stop having fun just because you're not 20 anymore. If you spend your 30s chasing money, you'll end up being a sullen, cynical, unhappy person.

All people who have left their 30th birthday far behind say with one voice: no money is worth it if you don’t enjoy life.

So enjoy life and have fun while you can. Go on dates, play with children (if you have any), organize trips with friends and see the world. You only live once. So why not live this life the way you want? Enjoy this age, make wonderful memories and don’t forget about your goals.

Be curious and do at least one thing every day that scares you.

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“Get out of the house and go on a trip now,” writes user Marie Leak, “make it as long as you can. Take photos, open up to the wind and freedom. If possible, take someone you care about with you to make it a memorable experience for the rest of your life. This must be something more than just jumping out of a plane; it must be measured not in hours and minutes, but in days. And you will smile, remembering this, even in old age, when you are creaky and feeble old men, I promise.”

It's too late for me

They can change everything, but I can’t help it. My train has long left.

Think back to yourself - most likely, this is not the first time you have thought this way. For some, at 7 it was “too late” to go to ballet school - but at 25, as it turned out, it was the right time. Someone at 18 broke up with their first love and suffered (“No one will love me like that again!”), but later learned that this had little to do with real feelings. Someone didn’t drop out of a boring university in his second year because he didn’t want to waste two years, and now he’s been toiling away at a job he doesn’t like for ten years. But just like ten years ago, now it’s still not too late to change something.

An analytical survey showed that more than half of our compatriots have at least once thought about changing their profession. Moreover, among all age categories, it is respondents 25–34 years old who most often consider the option of leaving for another field of activity—their overwhelming majority, 74%. However, only 17% of them actually do this.

But according to the results of a LinkedIn study, 36% of respondents at the age of 30 change their field of activity or profession. And this does not take into account those who decide to take such a step even later! We can hope that in Russia the number of brave people will grow.

It is a mistake to believe that we only get worse with age. How many times have we heard that nerve cells do not recover, memory deteriorates, we learn more slowly, we absorb information more poorly, we need to study foreign languages in childhood, etc. But these are only general models of mental development, and not a law that knows no exceptions. Psychologists Laura Germain from Harvard University and Joshua Hartshorne from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology conducted a study in which more than 48 thousand respondents took part. It turns out that there is no “best age” when all cognitive abilities reach peak values. No matter how trivial it may sound, every stage of life has its advantages. For example, information is really easier to process when we are 18–19, but 60–67 year olds can boast of the richest vocabulary.

But emotional intelligence, as Jermain and Hartshorne found, reaches its peak of development at 40–50 years of age.

So the main optimist of Soviet animation, the crocodile Gena, was right: “And although we feel a little sorry for the past, / The best, of course, is ahead!” Or at least very, very good.

Get enough sleep

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“Keep a daily routine,” writes user Nan Waldman. — A dark room will help you relax. No gadgets with bright screens before bed. Go to bed and wake up at the same time.”

You were born in 1990 or 1991

1990 — August 6. The UN Security Council approved a resolution imposing a military and trade embargo against Iraq. A protracted oil and military conflict with Iraq began. November 22. The “Iron Lady” of world politics, Margaret Thatcher, Prime Minister of Great Britain, publicly announced her resignation. December. A referendum was held in Croatia regarding secession from Yugoslavia. The overwhelming majority of citizens voted to leave. The formal disintegration of Yugoslavia began.

1991 - The 25th of January. Iraq is dumping oil reserves into the Persian Gulf. This threatens an environmental disaster. October 1st. Leningrad was renamed and its historical name was returned - St. Petersburg. December 8th. Representatives of Russia, Belarus and Ukraine sign an agreement on the Creation of a Commonwealth of Independent States, to which 5 more countries of the former Soviet Union join on December 21. December 25th. USSR President Mikhail Gorbachev resigns. The USSR officially ceases to exist.

1992 - February 2. In many CIS countries, economic reform began, which consisted of price liberalization - the abolition of centralized price controls. January 12. Russia and Ukraine signed an agreement on the division of the Black Sea Fleet in Crimea. The beginning of the era of GSM communications. This year, Germany launched a GSM communication system, which was subsequently used as a prototype for many operators around the world.

1993 - 1st of January. The final division of Czechoslovakia into two countries takes place. The 4th of October. Government tanks are shooting at the White House in Moscow. As a result of the incident, 150 people die. The system of power in Russia has changed dramatically. This marked the beginning of the creation of a presidential-parliamentary republic. 12 December. Referendum on the adoption of the Constitution of the Russian Federation. 58.4% of citizens were in favor of adoption.

1994 - January 31. The first images from the Hubble Space Telescope, which photographs galaxies at an early stage of their development, were demonstrated. the 6th of May. The Channel Tunnel, connecting England and France, was opened. The total length of the tunnel is 50 kilometers, 38 kilometers are laid under the sea itself. December 11th. Fighting began in the Chechen Republic. The troops of the Russian Federation begin fighting. The fighting did not stop until an agreement was signed to end the war in Khasavyurt (until 08/30/1996). The first book on CD appeared in the USA. By the end of the year, most encyclopedias had been created or translated into this format.

1995 - 20th of March. Nerve gas was used in the Tokyo subway in Japan, killing 5,000 people and killing 12. On May 16, Soko Asahara, the leader of the religious sect Aum Shinrikyo, was arrested. The first artificial liver was tested, performed by German surgeon Peter Neu Haus.

1996 - 4th of July. B.N. Yeltsin becomes President of the Russian Federation for the second time. This is the first time the same person has been re-elected to the post of President of Russia. A test began to be used to detect AIDS. Proteins produced by the virus were detected in the blood, which made it possible to diagnose the disease at an early stage.

1997 - February 22. Scottish scientists announced the birth of the only surviving embryo, a clone of an adult sheep. Dolly was born on July 5, 1996 without any abnormalities and lived until February 14, 2003 as an ordinary sheep. 4th of July. A rover designed to collect and analyze Martian soils has landed on the surface of Mars.

1998 — August 17. In Russia, the ruble depreciated, which led to an aggravation of the economic crisis. The country's government resigned. September 24. The first transplant of a limb from a deceased patient to a living one took place. A hand and forearm were transplanted in the city of Lyon, France. 12 December. The first organ transplant to a child was performed in the United States. A three-year-old Florida boy received a heart, lung and liver transplant at a Pennsylvania hospital.

1999 - 1st of January. Most countries of the European Union have switched to paying in the new European currency – the euro. March 24. The first NATO air raid was carried out on Yugoslavia. The US invaded a sovereign state that was not threatened by a third party.

2000 - 26 March. Election of V.V. Putin to the post of President of the Russian Federation. The official inauguration took place on May 7. A robotic developmental doll has been created in the USA. She knew how to talk, laugh, cry, blink, make grimaces. In the process of communicating with people, she increased her vocabulary and reached the development level of a two-year-old child. The first medicinal products were created in Novosibirsk, the prefix “Bifido” was added to the usual name. They contain a liquid concentrate of bifidobacteria, which have a positive effect on the intestinal microflora, prevent the development of pathogenic microbes and nourish the body with B vitamins and vitamin K. Such products quickly gained popularity among buyers.

2001 - January 15. The official launch of the English site Wikipedia took place - a resource that today has become an assistant in quickly obtaining encyclopedic data in all areas of life. 11 September. The largest terrorist attack in world history was committed in the United States. As a result, the Pentagon was damaged, the Trade Center was destroyed, and human losses amounted to about three thousand people.

2002 - 1st of January. The European Union introduced euro coins and banknotes, which became the single currency for most EU countries and played an important role in stabilizing the global European economy. October. After 50 years, the restoration of the railway between North and South Korea began. October 23. In Moscow, Russia, Chechen terrorists took hostages in a theater on Dubrovka. Three days later, on October 26, all the terrorists were killed during the assault by special forces. One of the hostages died from a bullet wound, the remaining 116 people died from exposure to the gas used during the assault.

2003 - 20th of March. Military operations began in Iraq. September 27. The automatic station “Smart-1” was launched to study the Moon.

2004 — Bloodless revolutions took place in Georgia, Ukraine, and Kyrgyzstan, as a result of which more democratic leaders came to power. 1st of May. The European Union has expanded its scope with the inclusion of ten new countries. June. The world's largest social network - Facebook - has been created.

2005 - 5 January. Eris, the largest of the dwarf planets in our solar system, has been discovered.

2006 - March 29. The first total eclipse of the sun in the 21st century could be observed in Russia. 24 August. Scientists have stripped Pluto of its planetary status. This decision was made at the congress of the International Astronomy Union in Prague, Czech Republic.

2007 — Genetics have discovered modifications in the human body that are responsible for the development of certain diseases. After DNA analysis, it became possible to identify a predisposition to certain diseases.

2008 - February 17. Kosovo declared independence from Serbia. 8 August. Military operations began in South Ossetia. November 4. Presidential elections took place in the United States. The first black president in the history of the state, Barack Obama, became the head of the state.

2009 — August 17. A disaster occurred at the Sayano-Shushenskaya hydroelectric power station. Hundreds of people became victims. The cause of the problems was a series of shortcomings and a failure in the redistribution of electricity in the power system.

2010 - 18th of March. Russian mathematician Grigory Perelman proved the Poincaré conjecture, which was considered one of the unsolvable Problems of the Millennium. For this, the Clay Mathematical Institute awarded him a prize of $1 million, which he refused. April 10th. A plane crash occurred over Smolensk, in which Lech Kaczynski, the President of Poland, his wife Maria Kaczynskaya, the high military command, Polish politicians, as well as religious and public figures (97 people in total) died. The first living cell was created in which its own DNA was replaced with DNA created artificially. Humanity has received new tools for developing technologies for artificially growing organs.

2011 - 11th of March. In Japan, off the northeastern coast, an earthquake occurred, the magnitude of which reached 8.9. As a result of the earthquake, a devastating tsunami arose, as a result of which over 15 thousand people died, several thousand are considered missing. May 2. Osama bin Laden, the “No. 1” terrorist in the world, the leader of Al-Qaeda, who, in particular, is considered responsible for the September 11 terrorist attack, was killed. September 7. An international charter flight crashed near Yaroslavl. On board the plane was the team of the Lokomotiv hockey club, which was flying to Minsk. 44 people died, one survived. October 31. The seven billionth inhabitant of the Earth was born in Kaliningrad.

2012 - February 21. In Moscow, in the Cathedral of Christ the Savior, a scandalous punk prayer service of the PussyRiot group took place, three members of which were detained by the police. December 1. Russia has led the G20 (G20), a forum of representatives of countries with the most developed economies: Australia, Japan, Argentina, South Africa, Brazil, South Korea, Great Britain, France, Germany, Turkey, India, USA, Indonesia, Saudi Arabia, Italy, Mexico, Canada, China.

2013 - February, 15. A meteorite fell in the Urals - the largest celestial body that collided with the surface of the Earth after the Tunguska meteorite. Because of the “Chelyabinsk” meteorite (it exploded in the vicinity of Chelyabinsk), 1,613 people were injured. February, 15. Asteroid 2012 DA14 flew by at the minimum distance from planet Earth (27,000 km). This was the closest distance in the entire history of astronomy. March 13. The most powerful telescope on the planet begins operating in the Atacama Desert, Chile.

2014 — February 7-23. The XXII Winter Olympic Games took place in Sochi. 18th of March. Putin V.V. signed an agreement on the admission of the Crimean Peninsula and Sevastopol to Russia. This agreement comes into force from the moment of ratification by the Federal Assembly - March 21. October 26. Permanent winter time introduced

2015 - Jan. 7. A terrorist attack took place at the office of the satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo in Paris, based on a caricature of the Prophet Mohammed previously posted in the magazine. 12 people were killed and 11 people were injured.

Learn to meditate

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“The list of benefits from this is endless, but the least it will give you is a little time for yourself every day, and it will also help you change the way you think about your life and the people you love,” writes user Rens de Nobel. “And compared to previous decades, there are a lot of scientific papers on meditation that would be useful to read.”