Why shouldn’t a woman date a married man and are there any happy mistresses?

1. The truth about having an affair with a married man
2. The benefits of having an affair with a married man
3. Features of an affair with a married man at work
4. 5 tips on how to behave in a relationship with a married man
5. 3 stages of breaking up with a married man

An affair with a married man is, of course, always intriguing and interesting. The very sacredness of the situation already gives me butterflies in my stomach, and my whole life is filled with new meaning. However, is it all so wonderful, and do happy endings happen often?

Disappointing statistics say that the hopes of 15% of women are justified, and the rest, alas, will never be among the lucky ones. We will talk about the peculiarities of such relationships and why girls generally decide to become mistresses, counting on happiness, in this article.

Why do girls become mistresses?

There are actually plenty of single men, but often women’s gaze still falls on married men. Real mistresses say: “Why can’t I date a married man if that’s what I want?” Where do the roots of such a desire come from? There are no coincidences in life, so love for busy men also has certain reasons:

1. The woman has no idea until the very end that her loved one is legally married. A man simultaneously deceives two girls: his wife and his mistress. Surely he has no conscience, but this does not make the fate of his women any easier. In this case, the ignorant girl cannot be blamed for anything.
2. Subconscious reluctance to have a serious relationship. Psychological trauma that occurred in the past could be the reason that a woman does not want to tie the knot. She chooses men with whom she obviously has nothing but sex. It is possible that the girl already had unsuccessful family relationships, or that her parents often fought. Subconsciously, she is afraid of repeating her difficult fate and finds exclusively married men. This is how a woman wants to protect herself from entering into a legal marriage. A sense of freedom and lack of obligations is more important for girls of this type.
3. The woman is not confident in herself and is unconsciously looking for a supporting role. Complexes and tightness make her suffer in the arms of a married man. A lady with such a character believes that she will never find another free gentleman and chooses the role of a victim, in love with a married man. She thinks this is better than nothing. On the one hand, this is convenient, since the girl is pitied, and she receives moral satisfaction from this. But on the other hand, a lady will never achieve true happiness.
4. Love for a married man. It happens that a woman is so strongly attached to someone else’s husband that no reasonable arguments can, even over time, dissolve the vicious union. This is convenient for a man; he is unlikely to actually want a divorce. Communication on the side serves for his physical satisfaction and obtaining new emotions. And the mistress suffers from unrequited love and feeds on vain hopes for an improvement in the situation.

It is worth assessing all the consequences of a relationship with a married man. Every lover should listen carefully to herself and realize whether she needs this relationship with all its pros and cons.

The truth about having an affair with a married man

Many films have been made and many songs have been sung on the theme of love triangles. One of the Russian statistical centers revealed that every second of our compatriots had a love affair with a married man. The reasons for such relationships were voiced differently - from the desire to get a thrill to a sudden surge of passion. Do not forget that, according to the same statistics, there are more women than men. Therefore, a lady is sometimes forced to get involved in such relationships in order to build her own happiness.

Is it happiness? How acceptable is it to destroy someone else's family to create your own? This is already a question of ethics. And one can talk about such a topic for a very long time. But what pushes women and men to such novels?

Unfaithful husbands are usually forced to have an affair by the following reasons:

• A man lacks attention from his wife. The heat of love has cooled, and the wife no longer looks at him with the same passion. Trying to find intense emotions on the side, the husband takes on a mistress.
• Intimacy is not enjoyable. Sex, as an important component of relationships in marriage, can become a stumbling block. If a man does not find a response to his erotic fantasies from his wife, then he will begin to look for their fulfillment with someone else.
• The desire to assert oneself. Narcissism and the desire to prove his own importance can push a man to seek thrills.

Negative consequences for a mistress

Relationships between a man and a woman are always complex and multifaceted. But even more difficult for any girl will be an affair with a married man. Don’t delude yourself and take on faith the lies that a man puts on your ears. Those guys who left their wives for mistresses are such an insignificant number that they will not affect the disappointing statistics. So why can't you date a married man:

1. You always fade into the background. Don't assume that someone's husband will give you the maximum amount of attention. Short meetings for sex are what mainly threaten mistresses. And a weekend once a month, when a man excuses himself from his wife with an imaginary business trip, cannot be considered a full-fledged relationship.
2. You are facing possible problems with his wife. If your lover’s wife finds out that he has you, she is unlikely to limit herself to a quiet scandal in the family circle. Surely she will look for you to at least have a serious conversation, and at most ruin your life as much as possible.
3. If you have a child, it is unlikely that it will be long-awaited. When a man already has a family and children, the fruit of your time together will not delight him. As a potential mother, you should be looking for a guy who will be a good father. And a man who has already started a family, who also walks to the left, is unlikely to become an exemplary daddy for your offspring.
4. You will be forced to constantly hide from prying eyes. Don’t even begin to imagine pictures of walks with your lover in parks, cafes and cinemas. He definitely doesn’t need the status of a cheater. Meetings will take place secretly from prying eyes: at your home, in a rented apartment or in hotel rooms. So there can be no talk of any romance in public.
5. You will not be able to introduce him to your family and will never meet his parents. You won’t be able to brag about your groom either, you won’t say: “Mom, hello, this is Dima, he’s already married, but I’m his mistress.” And he won’t want to advertise your vague relationship in front of his family, who probably don’t know that he’s cheating on his legal wife.
6. You will lose precious time searching for a worthy gentleman. Youth is not eternal, and you will spend the most wonderful years of your life with an already married man. It is unknown how your romance will end. But the time that could have been spent searching for a potential husband cannot be returned. There is a high probability of being left with nothing.

Think about it, do you need such a complex relationship? Outline for yourself the consequences of a relationship with your married man. Don’t be naive and careless, so that you don’t cry bitter tears into your pillow because of the hopelessness of the situation.

Features of an affair with a married man at work

When Cupid's arrow pierces the heart, even the coldest head can lose his mind. Falling in love with a married colleague is quite an adventure. Therefore, it is worth understanding in advance all the disadvantages of such a novel in order to prevent unnecessary feelings from developing.

It is unnecessary for the reason that the losing party will be the woman. At work, the atmosphere within the team is important. Much depends on the level of communication with colleagues and superiors. If corporate ethics does not accept mixing personal and business relationships, which often happens, then the homewrecker will face a wave of hostility.

What is the prognosis for an affair with a married colleague?

• Even if both participants in the adultery are masters of disguise, they will not be able to hide the relationship for long. Non-verbal signals will be easily read, and the affair will become public knowledge. There will also be a well-wisher who will pass everything on to his wife.

Are there any advantages to being a mistress?

Every event in life, even the most negative, has a positive side. And being a mistress has its own advantages:

1. Relative freedom. If you suddenly decide to go for a walk or to a cafe with friends, you do not need to report about being in the company of male strangers. The lover simply does not have the right to set conditions, since he himself is married.
2. Lack of living together. Washing shirts and preparing a three-course dinner is not your story. You get an already ironed and well-fed man, for whom his wife went out of her way in this regard. In addition to physical stress, everyday life can cause a decrease in the degree of romantic feelings, and you, in fact, get the cream of the crop.
3. There is no satiety between you. You don't spend much time together, which only serves to intensify passions. A man is bored both emotionally and physically, and you are probably not in debt either. Therefore, rare meetings are full of emotions, which makes them more enjoyable.
4. You don't need to solve serious issues together. Mortgage, credit, old sick grandmother – these are behind-the-scenes problems for you. You don’t have to worry about your lover’s serious troubles in life, because you live for yourself. Accept gifts and surprises, and let debts and problems worry his legal wife.

Whether you can date a married man or not, you must decide for yourself. Each novel is individual, we have outlined only general characteristics.

Divide a blank sheet of paper into two halves: on one side, write all the advantages of an affair with a specific man, and on the other, all the negative ones. This way you can clearly see which side of the scale weighs heavily on you.

Lariat a stranger's man4

Loving a married man is not easy, and if a mistress dreams of building a serious and long-term relationship with him, she should make every effort.

To win him over to your side and subsequently migrate to the role of a spouse, you must do the following:

• Never speak ill of your wife. Taking second place in the heart of a beloved man is difficult and offensive, but this does not give the right to insult and ridicule a member of his family. Once he made a choice in favor of this woman, perhaps she is the mother of his children. It will be unpleasant for a man to hear criticism and offensive words addressed to her.
• Talk about a future together just once. There is no need to endlessly appeal to the voice of conscience and cry about long lonely evenings. Such stories will soon become unpleasant and irritating to him. The man will make the proposed choice: in favor of another mistress.
• Taboo on threats. Some mistresses, in desperation, do all sorts of nonsense. They throw notes to the wife with “good news” about her husband’s infidelity, bombard her with messages or phone calls, and blackmail the man into telling the truth to his wife about their affair. You absolutely cannot do such things.
• Life vest. A mistress should be not only a skilled seductress, but also a wonderful comrade. A man should feel comfortable and good not only in bed with a woman, but also during a frank conversation. The “Second Lady” should encourage him, calm him down, admire him, and completely discard his grumpy tone and various complaints.

• The disadvantages of a wife are the advantages of a mistress. If a man complains about his wife, the secret girlfriend should not support his conversation, but reel off the information. Is your spouse a terrible cook? The mistress must master the culinary basics. A man will make the right decision in favor of an excellent “cook” if burnt buckwheat is waiting for him at home, and fragrant meat balls are waiting for him on his mistress’s table.

Pros and cons of such relationships

The psychology of relationships between a married man and a married woman includes both positive and negative aspects. They must be taken into account if such an alliance already exists. Among the advantages, it is worth noting freedom of movement, lack of responsibilities, constant gifts and attention.

The disadvantages include loneliness, lack of rights to a loved one, and the inability to openly express feelings. As a rule, at first it is interesting to communicate and enjoy each other's company. But the more time passes, the more such connections become more and more burdensome. They are seen as hopeless, devoid of color and a future together.

Pros and cons

Why a woman chooses the role of a mistress and proudly declares that only she could please a married man is a very difficult task to study. Some ladies are not at all against such a relationship, they consider it the right decision in their lives and are in no hurry to leave. Others manage to fall in love with the unlucky ladies' man and begin to be jealous of his legal wife, demanding a divorce. It happens that a man himself can fall in love with his mistress, end his past relationship and begin to build a new life abruptly and unexpectedly even for himself.

Usually a love triangle collapses quickly, especially if the spouse finds out about the betrayal. Quarrels and conflicts begin to happen. Sometimes a family falls apart overnight - the wife ceases not only to see her ex-husband, but also to communicate. There are very rare cases where cheating helps spouses become much closer than before.

Quarrels due to cheating spouse

What are the motivations for and against such a relationship? Psychologists found out who may like such a pastime and who is categorically against it as a result of a survey of women and men in California. Some of the answers were quite surprising.

Pros and cons of a relationship with an unfree man

Diseases

If a married partner distracts a woman from fulfilling her true karmic goal, her energy will become weak, and this will lead to a weakening of her immunity. As a result, the body becomes a potential breeding ground for diseases, and the woman’s intuition is muffled.

Moreover, the presence of debts in karma caused by relationships with someone else’s spouse leads to specific ailments not only for the mistress. Thus, in the body of deceived wives, the risk of mastopathy increases, and in a cheater, the 2nd chakra is overfilled, which causes adenoma. When a person prevents truly loving hearts from connecting and deceives others (in particular, a mistress), he increases the likelihood of neurodermatitis.

It is worth noting that if women know about each other, during sex they invest more aggression and destructive energy into their partner. This leads to diseases of the genitourinary system both in men (as the carrier of this negativity) and in women (as recipients of these vibrations).

Reasons for relationships on the side.

It is generally accepted that a husband goes “to the left” when something does not suit him in the family: he does not find support, understanding, affection, or is not satisfied with sexual relations. Most often, this happens after several years of married life. After all, over time, passion fades away, feelings become ordinary. There is no hurricane of emotions and impressions that existed before the wedding. And the man again wants something new.

In addition, people can marry if necessary. For example, the appearance of an unplanned child. In such a couple, contractual relationships are often established, when each spouse lives his own life and does not make claims to his other half regarding his personal life. They can easily have partners on the side and not feel any guilt about it.

Although in traditional Russian families, wives are not ready to share their spouse with another woman. And husbands are in no hurry to leave the family because of their mistress. Therefore, relationships with such men quickly end.

An affair on the side, for most men, is just an emotional shake-up. And for them, a stable family life is preferable to running from one mistress to another.

How to end a novel correctly

If the relationship causes nothing but suffering, then something needs to be done. To come to terms with the current state of things means to adapt to the situation. Losing self-respect, a woman cannot be the one for her chosen one for whom he wants to move mountains.

A love relationship with a married person must be ended calmly, but with firm intention. You can’t doubt, let him convince you. You should carefully prepare for the conversation, think through all possible phrases and responses to painful remarks.

When is it better to break up?

A tyrant husband - signs of what to do and how to live with an abuser

Such relationships are often not strong and long-lasting. It’s best not to start them at all if:

• The woman is uncomfortable being in such a relationship; she realizes that the man will not leave his family,
• The relationship has exhausted itself emotionally,
• Relationships are built on the illusion of a wonderful future,
• You have to justify both yourself and the man, and get nothing in return,
• The realization comes that this is a hopeless relationship, built, rather, on an attachment, then the time has come to part.

When making a decision is difficult, the following question plan will help:

• Is it nice that a woman is hidden?
• Do you feel like the future is unclear?
• Isn’t it annoying that you have to plan your vacation with a third party (spouse)?
• What emotions does it evoke when your beloved man is married to someone else?

Honest answers will help firmly put an end to the tormenting relationship.

Changing the karma of the unborn child

Surprisingly, if a woman does not break strong karmic knots with her past married partner, she passes on information about his family even to that baby who is born from another person 2-10 years later!

Of course, for this you need to be a lover for a long time and become attached to your partner, but still the possibility of telegony can never be ruled out. A child who has an energetic connection with other men, and not with his own father, has a very weak ancestral and personal karma, his fate is not determined.