Updated July 22, 2021 829 Author: Dmitry Petrov
Hello, dear readers of the KtoNaNovenkogo.ru blog. Some couples celebrate every month that their relationship has become even longer and stronger.
They create a romantic atmosphere and give each other meaningful little things, crying with happiness. Others do not even breathe a sigh when their parents celebrate 50 years of marriage.
A simple example can be given when, while watching a melodrama, one person will constantly wipe his eyes, and the other will sit with a stony face.
Is a sentimental person some special type of personality, capable of perceiving a situation more deeply? And how to deal with this trait if it bothers you?
Definition of the concept
What does the word "sentimentality" mean? The literal meaning is sensitivity. The name is derived from the French word sentiment, which translates as “feelings”. This is a personality trait in which a person perceives the world around him through the prism of feelings. In simple words, in the struggle between heart and mind, the heart always wins - there is too much sentimentality in a person.
What else is characteristic of a sentimental person? He reacts more sharply to any event. Emotions can be both positive and negative. A sentimental person is easy to surprise, impress, and delight. But he is just as easy to offend and hurt. In most cases, excessive sensitivity is manifested by a heightened sense of compassion and an enthusiastic attitude towards the world. What will not cause any emotions in one person will touch the sentimental one to the depths of his soul. Sometimes this manifests itself in tears for no reason or reason. True, to others, the tears of a sentimental person almost always seem causeless.
Note! Heightened sensitivity does not guarantee kindness, generosity, altruism and other qualities of virtue. A sentimental person can be an egoist, a cynic, an evil type. And often this is what happens if from childhood he realizes that his peculiarity is not accepted, if he is laughed at, mocked.
In the dictionary Complete accentuated paradigm according to A. A. Zaliznya
sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental, sentimental
Sentimentality in men and women
Most people consider hypersensitivity to be a trait typical of women and unforgivable for men. It actually has nothing to do with gender. At the same time, men tend to hide their emotions.
For the most part, women are indeed a little more emotional than men, which is due to greater mobility and plasticity of the nervous system. This is also due to the peculiarity of male and female thinking: the former think linearly (keep attention to only one thing, do not move on to another until they finish it), and the latter think systemically (keep a lot of attention, talk about everything at once).
Psychologists are also still arguing about the difference in thinking between men and women. But it is reliably known that sensitivity depends on the type of nervous system, that is, on temperament. People with a mobile type are more prone to sentimentality. This group includes sanguine and choleric people. But sentimentality is also influenced by the imbalance of the nervous system. According to this principle, the melancholic person joins the already mentioned temperaments. Temperament is an innate characteristic that is not related to gender. So it turns out that excessive sensitivity is also not related to gender.
The only thing that can explain the difference in sentiment between men and women is hormonal characteristics. The higher the testosterone level, the less sensitivity. Over the years, its level decreases in men and women. Based on this, the concept of “senile sentimentality” emerged.
Let's look at the characteristics of sentimentality in men and women in a little more detail.
Sentimentality in men
Hearing from early childhood that “men don’t cry,” boys get used to suppressing their emotions. But, for example, people with creative thinking are not at all embarrassed by their feelings. And other men can also be very sensitive regarding a specific matter, interest, hobby or particular area of life.
For example, men are much more sentimental than women in relationships with children, especially daughters. Many people painfully experience failures at work and in business. Yes, maybe a man will not cry (although this also happens, and there is nothing terrible about it), but he will feel what is called “cats scratching at his soul.” Many men love to look after girls beautifully, arrange surprises, give gifts - these are also manifestations of sentimentality. This feature of the psyche is often combined with romance.
Sentimentality in women
Often, some women pretend to be sentimental, and many mistakenly believe that they are overly emotional. Using this as a cover, you can throw tantrums, pout, manipulate in relationships, expect concessions at work, etc. But, as studies show, women and men are approximately equally emotional. And even more: in terms of details, men are more attentive. For example, a study was conducted where men and women were asked to look at portraits of people and guess the emotions captured. Men coped with this task better. They revealed subtle facial changes.
If male sensitivity is more noticeable in the sphere of hobbies, business and relationships with children, then sentimentality in women manifests itself in all its glory in relationships with men. Another interesting feature: female sensitivity is more often noticeable in the context of negative events, and male sensitivity in the context of positive ones.
Important! Excessive sensitivity is often considered a congenital characteristic, but it can also be acquired. For example, many girls become more vulnerable and tearful during pregnancy and before menstruation (due to hormonal changes). With some diseases that cause hormonal imbalance, increased sensitivity is also noticeable.
Sentimentality: pros and cons
It is impossible to say for sure whether this is good or bad. Especially if we are talking about an innate feature of the psyche. Perhaps everything is good in moderation. It is difficult to work or live with a person who is offended and cries over any comment, even if it is expressed as a wish in a positive way. But it is also impossible to interact with a callous person who does not know how to enter into the position of another and empathize.
The main disadvantage of heightened sensitivity is harm to the person himself. All people of this type are at risk for exhaustion and emotional burnout. Some people feel guilty when they realize that they cannot help someone, or when they worry about universal injustice and their inability to help everyone. In addition, due to excessive sensitivity, some people quarrel with others. And it happens that acquaintances take advantage of a person’s sentimentality - then he feels unhappy and weak.
But not everything is so simple. At the same time, sentimentality helps in social interaction. Sentimental people feel better about the moods and states of other people. They know how to support, you can always turn to them in difficult times, when you need to talk it out.
Thus, in moderation, sentimentality is useful and helps in your personal life and at work. Excessive sentimentality interferes with building business, friendship or love relationships. Manifestations of excessive sensitivity can be controlled, and insufficient emotionality can be developed.
Interesting! Sentimental people tend to idealize. They do not notice the flaws in something that caused them a strong emotional reaction. But this is only true if we are talking about positive emotions. With negative experiences, a sentimental person, on the contrary, is prone to devaluation, that is, he notices only the shortcomings of another person, situation, etc.
5 Reasons Why People Get Sentimental
“Why did I become sentimental?” As a rule, such thoughts come to a person who has already reached a certain age. However, other reasons may also affect this. Let's look at them in more detail.
Age
Sentimentality becomes more pronounced with age. We have already said that hormone levels change with age. Men, in particular, change their character. They become softer, more emotional, and they develop the ability to empathize. It is the representatives of the stronger sex who begin to search for the meaning of life.
They go back to the past, relive happy moments again and again, realize that they lived with the wrong women, did not participate in raising children, etc. But they can't go back. All that remains is to indulge in dreams.
In addition, older people have a long history of life experience. The situations that others face are familiar to them, they have experienced them in the past. Memories sharpen their perception of the outside world. It seems to the elderly man that he has found himself in the distant past when the same events happened to him. Emotions are visible.
Perhaps only with age does a person begin to appreciate life, to understand how beautiful the world is and how wonderful the sunrise is, which we may not see tomorrow. One of the reasons for sentimentality can be safely called ageism.
Lack of serotonin
A lack of the happiness hormone can lead to excessive sentimentality. If a person does not experience pleasure and joy, he is prone to tearfulness and tenderness. Autumn, darkness and cloudy weather cause sadness. We crave bright sunshine and warmth. At this time, sentimentality manifests itself in increased tearfulness for no good reason. If you are prone to seasonal depression, you should seek help from a psychologist.
But in spring we bloom along with nature. We delight in the sparse grass, warm sunshine and high blue sky. Emotions are heightened. This is why many people feel more deeply during this time.
Upbringing
Sometimes upbringing can explain why a person is sentimental. If a child grew up in a family of emotional, sensitive, affectionate parents, then most likely he himself will become like that. Reading novels and watching melodramas can develop sentimentalism. If a child grows up in such an atmosphere, sentimentality is guaranteed.
Changes in hormonal levels
At certain periods of life, women and men experience hormonal changes. Testosterone influences men's sentimentality. When it becomes smaller, the stronger sex becomes softer and more vulnerable.
Important! Sudden sentimentality and tearfulness may be a sign of illness. Consult your doctor.
Women during menopause, menstruation or pregnancy also react more sharply to everything that happens. If temporary sentimentality prevents you from leading a normal life, consult a specialist. He or she may prescribe medications to stabilize hormone levels.
Features of the psyche
Creative people are overly sentimental. They are more sensitive to nature, the mood of others, and events. Poets and artists succumb to the impulses of the soul and create real masterpieces. This is a feature of the psyche, innate increased emotionality.
Of course, we are not just talking about creative people. Every person has the ability to empathize. Some people simply experience emotions more strongly than others, while others tend to bury them deep inside.
The child’s family and environment have the most important influence on the development of his personality
How to deal with sentimentality
Do we need to fight sentimentality? If you understand that it interferes with your work and personal life, is psychologically exhausting and physically harmful, then you need to get rid of it. How to do it? Use the anchoring method.
How to get rid of sentimentality and tearfulness for a woman or man:
- Choose any incentive. This could be a word (for example, “stop”), some object (what you will carry with you), sound, smell, etc. - anything.
- Practice interacting with this stimulus. What should be done? Form a stable association between the stimulus and the state of stability, rationality, and restraint. How to achieve this? Choose the state you want to feel instead of an attack of sensuality. Remember any situation in which you experienced exactly this feeling/state. Immerse yourself in it as much as possible, imagine. Example: silently or out loud say “stop”, then remember a situation of power (let’s call it that).
- Repeat the workout regularly. Your goal is to learn to immerse yourself in the desired state without much effort, just by looking at the stimulus or hearing it, feeling it (depending on what you chose).
- Exercise regularly at home, and not just in those moments when your feelings ask to come out. After 2-4 weeks you will notice the first lasting results, and after a couple of months you will be able to easily immerse yourself in the desired state, just by telling yourself “stop”.
Regular practice helps rewire neural connections in your brain, causing you to respond in new ways and learn to control your behavior.
Examples of sentimentality
Heightened sensitivity occurs in all areas of life or only in one thing. For example, a person can be sentimental about animals and completely indifferent, or even cruel, towards people. Some people are sentimental only about joyful events, surprises, compliments, and romantic stories. And some people react excessively emotionally to criticism, remarks, insults, and tragic stories.
A sentimental person may cry when watching a film, hearing a story. Interestingly, sentimental reactions are more often associated with events in other people's lives or with fantastic stories. A person can react rather restrainedly to events in his life. This is due to the fact that excessive emotionality is most associated with compassion and empathy.
In the dictionary Dictionary of foreign words
oh, oh, flax, flax
1. full f. Based on the principles of sentimentalism. S. novel.
2. About a work of art: sweet, one that is easy to touch. S. film.
3. About the person: capable of being easily moved and emotional. Sentimental young lady. Sentimentality - 1) the property of the sentimental; 2) sentimental act, sentimental behavior, expression. To be sentimental (colloquial) - 1) to be sentimental, to be tender; 2) treat someone. too soft, condescending.
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