How to Love Your Husband Again: Actionable Tips: Pexels Years of daily routine and monotonous life can dull even the strongest feelings. After a few years, many spouses no longer experience intense passion and often live like neighbors. How to return your old feelings and love your husband again?
Don't focus on shortcomings
Many wives tend to dwell on their husband's shortcomings. Socks thrown by the sofa, slurping while eating, unbrushed teeth seem like small, insignificant offenses at the beginning of a relationship. Over the years, such little things become a serious irritant for the wife if she does not learn to accept her husband's shortcomings.
To fall in love with your spouse again, learn to ignore such trifles. If you can’t ignore them completely, make a list of a man’s virtues and re-read it often. This alternative pushes the husband’s annoying habits into the background.
Knownly losing strategies
Before you figure out how to make your wife fall in love with you again, you should familiarize yourself with the obviously losing strategies that are often found in glossy magazines. List of common mistakes:
- Parting. If there are problems in the family, then they must be solved immediately and under one roof. When alone, partners tend to blame each other for all the troubles, which is unlikely to help restore the relationship.
- A wait-and-see attitude on the part of the husband. The most harmful advice is to wait until the wife comes to her senses and decides to return. In fact, a woman may like her free life, so she will not rush back.
- Give thousands of arguments. In most cases, the spouse guesses how the chosen one will persuade her. And his arguments are practically useless. It's not words that matter, but actions.
- It's tearful to beg. Pressing for pity is a bad option. The wife is already in a negative mood, and tears will make the situation even worse. A woman wants to see a man next to her, not a whining boy.
- Go for blackmail. The desperate husband begins to threaten that he will throw himself off the roof, or tell everything to the children, or complain to his mother-in-law. For the sake of the children, a woman may stay with her ex-lover, but her feelings for him are unlikely to change.
You shouldn’t buy all the flowers to surprise and make your cold wife fall in love with you. This should have been done during a happy marriage.
Stop criticizing your spouse
A meticulous critic who will find a lot of shortcomings and reasons for irritation in her husband lives in almost every woman. Coach Vadim Kurkin advises getting rid of this habit or turning complaints into constructive criticism.
When you make a comment, combine it with praise. This will help soften the criticism and not make your husband feel offended. When expressing reproaches, never get personal, use “I-messages” (“I was upset when my favorite cup broke”). Make critical comments only in a calm state.
Don't Criticize Your Spouse: Pexels
Let's sum it up
So, in order to win the heart of your soulmate again, you don’t need to try to change her, blame her and allow rude words towards her. First, analyze your behavior, take on some of the household chores. Pamper your beloved, organize romantic evenings for her from time to time. Be sure to be interested in her needs and problems, discuss her intimate life and, of course, surprise her. Remember: true love is unconditional, it will never demand anything in return. Therefore, try to drown out your own selfishness and simply give your beloved wife all the best that you have, without setting conditions for her. This is how you can win your wife’s heart, her loyalty and devotion.
Don't accumulate grievances
According to psychology professor Pavel Rakov, the reason for the cooling of feelings can be hidden grievances and understatements between partners. A man may not even realize that a woman is experiencing mental pain because of some of his misconduct. Tell us about the problem that is bothering you, ask direct questions, explain what you are not happy with and why.
Restrain your emotions, speak in a calm tone, remember that the purpose of the conversation is to return love, and not to worsen the relationship. “I-messages” will help avoid an accusatory tone in the dialogue. Listen to the other side, find a joint solution to the problem, forgive grievances and start building new open relationships. If you can’t deal with grievances on your own, consult a psychologist.
Getting your ex back - a vital necessity or damaged pride?
A hellish mixture of emotions is seething in the soul of a man whose wife leaves him. He experiences a wide range of feelings: from “honey, come back, I’ll fix everything” to “wait, bitch, I’ll take revenge on you.” Moreover, these feelings can change every second, throwing him from depression to aggression, torn apart by contradictions.
Therefore, before developing a plan to return your wife to the family nest, take a time out and think carefully. Why do you need it? You have truly realized that this woman is your only one, that she deserves love, respect, admiration and you are ready to give it to her.
Or maybe your offended pride is speaking in you now? Sometimes male psychology simply does not allow him to come to terms with the fact that he was abandoned, and therefore strives to return “everything as it was” in order to prove to himself and others his worth. Another common reason to keep a wife is an established life. If a man is not ready to wash his socks and cook dinners on his own, he will try to reason with the runaway housewife and regain the comforts to which he is accustomed.
If this is not about you and you really love and value your wife, then you can try to make her fall in love with you again. Please note, this will be much more difficult than the first time. It’s one thing to charm an unfamiliar woman, and quite another to ignite feelings in one who knows you like a shell, and sometimes harbors a serious grudge.
Talk about love
The human brain is easily suggestible. When people are in a bad mood and forcefully smile at their own reflection in the mirror, their mood improves. When they jump on the spot or dance, they become more fun. The same trick can be performed with extinguished feelings.
If you constantly mentally remind yourself of your feelings for your husband, your brain will believe you and love will return. More often, immerse yourself in memories of the best moments together and tell your chosen one about your love. Such confessions will cause a surge of feelings and stimulate the partner. To justify trust, he will try to make pleasant surprises more often and give joy.
Talk about love: Pexels
Get to know your spouse again
After several years of marriage, a woman begins to doubt that she has chosen the right life partner. It does not evoke the same feelings and does not seem the same as before. A woman needs to realize that the man living next to her is really not the guy she married: he has become older, smarter and wiser because he has walked a certain path.
Over the past years, both spouses have acquired new friends, habits and concerns. Hobbies or preferences in music and food have changed. In order not to live with a stranger and fall in love with your husband again:
- Find out about his hobbies and talents.
- Ask about his friends, work.
- Ask his opinion about what is happening in the world.
- Immerse your husband in your hobbies, talk about them during dinner, show off your achievements.
- Find topics of conversation that are close to both of you.
- Establish common romantic habits.
Have candlelit dinners every Thursday or make out in the last row of the movie theater on the weekends.
Create Romantic Habits: Pixabay
Practice
How to make a wife love her husband again? Advice from psychologists and practical recommendations:
- Be attentive to your spouse. Listen to the words that she says – perhaps you will find in them the reason for her cooled feelings, although you did not pay attention to it before. Think about those banal phrases that she says every day - what she complains about, what she wants to do - attention to her is the key to solving many problems in relationships. Don’t interrupt her, ask her in more detail if you feel that some topic worries her.
- Try to understand your spouse, and in such a way that she feels it. Be sure to provide help if it is within your power or simply express sympathy. Don’t be indifferent to her, and certainly don’t deny her problems – you should be on the same side of the barricade.
- Express your gratitude for her care for you .
Don’t leave ordinary household little things unnoticed, such as preparing lunch or dinner, cleaning the apartment. Don't emphasize that these are her responsibilities - praise her for her efforts. You need to make sure that your spouse understands – you notice what she does for you, her actions do not go unnoticed by her. - Help your wife. Help your spouse with routine tasks, even if they are not particularly difficult. Your spouse will be grateful for your participation and for giving her some free time. Also, communicating over one activity will allow you to better understand your wife and look at her responsibilities from her point of view.
- Give your wife some free time that she can devote to herself. Take over all the household responsibilities for at least a day, giving her a full day off. This is a very simple psychological technique in order to arouse sympathy, because she knows that she owes her free time to you.
- Earn your spouse's trust. At the same time as your actions that make a good impression on her and give your wife pleasant emotions, you must eliminate as much as possible the negativity that may be present in your relationship.
Spend more time together
Drowning in the daily routine, partners often forget about each other. Due to everyday life, work and caring for children, it is difficult for them to find time for personal communication and spending time together. This is bad for relationships. Spouses move away, feel alienated and separate.
To prevent this from happening and to rekindle your love for your husband, organize some leisure time together:
- Take a walk in the fresh air.
- Play board games.
- Watch and discuss popular film releases.
- Organize a shopping trip together.
According to psychologist and author of the book “Man and Woman” Mikhail Litvak, joint activities give rise to common tastes and views on life. And those, in turn, serve as a reliable foundation for strong love relationships and family life.
Make surprises
Stable relationships differ from nascent love in their predictability. At the beginning of a relationship, partners get to know each other. They feel newness in everything and do not know how the chosen one will behave in a given situation.
Bringing this feeling back into your married life is quite simple. Give your husband pleasant surprises more often: cook unusual dinners, give compliments for no particular reason, write loving messages.
This behavior will bring the missing novelty to the relationship and stimulate the spouse to take reciprocal initiative.
Surprise: Pexels
Go on a journey together
Most families live according to a predetermined plan. A planned life has its own charm and gives a feeling of stability, but mutes ardor and passion.
To revive the love for your spouse, forget about a perfectly planned life for a while. Leave room for spontaneity and unleash your inner child. Let him organize a romantic trip together. According to psychologist Elena Tsedova, a change of scenery and a joint vacation will have a positive impact on relationships.
Moreover, it is not necessary to spend the entire family budget on this and fly to the Maldives. You can get the necessary dose of romance in a neighboring city or at a country picnic.
When a woman notices that her feelings have faded, she has two options: pack her bags and leave, or try to love her husband again. Listen to the advice of experienced psychologists and work on your relationships. Perhaps love did not go away, but only took a nap in anticipation of a new wave of strong feelings in a marital relationship.
Original article: https://www.nur.kz/family/relationship/249861-kak-polyubit-muzha-zanovo-deystvennyye-sovety/
