Every man has at least once committed a serious offense, because of which his beloved was offended by him. In such a situation, it is urgent to look for an answer to the question of how best to apologize to your wife? Otherwise, the quarrel may drag on for several days or even result in separation.
An apology should always be thoughtful and at the same time correspond to the cause of the scandal. In such cases, the woman expects a sincere admission of her guilt, and the man’s task is to correct his wrongdoings. Below we will discuss the main causes of marital conflicts and ways to overcome them.
Apologies after a scandal or after drinking
If the day before a man initiated a quarrel, his task is to admit that he was wrong. What actions will definitely lead to reconciliation?
- You need to have a serious conversation, tell about the true reason for your temper.
- The man should note that he will no longer show his reaction so emotionally, or lose his temper so zealously.
- You can give your wife a small gift, buy her a bouquet of flowers, in order to prove your repentance with all your appearance.
- It is necessary to eliminate the reason for which the scandal occurred, and then the woman herself will forgive her lover.
Often quarrels occur purely on domestic grounds. Each person is accustomed to living in certain conditions, and coexistence with someone else can cause discomfort. This is why it is so important to make concessions, talk, and discuss family problems.
If the husband returns home very drunk, it is usually also impossible to avoid a scandal. In such a situation, the spouse must admit his guilt and promise not to do this again. If the situation repeats itself repeatedly, then it is necessary to move from empty promises to action. By not drinking alcohol next weekend, a man will best prove that his beloved is more important to him than alcoholic beverages, which means that reconciliation will be achieved.
What you absolutely CAN'T do
Hush up a quarrel (even a small one)
All conflicts have a cumulative effect. In addition, over time, the details are forgotten, only feelings remain: betrayal, mistrust, dissatisfaction, sadness, loneliness.
Learn to discuss everything, even the smallest misunderstandings, immediately after they happen - in a calm atmosphere, without shouting or insults.
Talk if anger and irritation have not yet subsided
As we already said, you need to give yourself time to cool down. It's normal to talk about what happened after a while. If emotions get the better of you, there is a risk of only aggravating the situation and taking the quarrel to a new level (even more difficult, of course).
Trying to settle the conflict with sex
A very insidious method that looks beautiful only in the movies, but in reality it only makes things worse. Firstly, this method leaves the problem at the same point, the partner’s resentment does not disappear, and understatement will corrode your relationship for a long time. And secondly, sex subsequently risks becoming a less pleasant activity, causing associations with quarrels, resentments and negative emotions.
“Settling Scores”
The phrase “I agree, I was wrong, but you too...” must be forgotten once and for all.
Pointing out your partner’s shortcomings, and at the same time listing everything that brings (or has brought) discomfort for a long time in order to look better against her background, is an extremely unfortunate technique.
You can and even need to express your dissatisfaction, but at the right time. It is worth learning to discuss problems in everyday life as they arise, without conflict and in a polite manner. Now is not the time to remember past grievances.
Gnawing yourself (long and painfully)
Admitting that you were wrong - yes, getting carried away and thinking only about it - no. Internal torment can play a cruel joke on you.
Firstly, there may be a feeling that you have already “suffered” enough, so there is no need to apologize (in fact, no).
Secondly, during torment, anger and irritation can flare up with renewed vigor, and the conflict will resume.
Thirdly, it often happens that the offender is so upset because of his incontinence that his partner has to console him: “Well, I’ll forgive you, it’s okay.”
In fact, this situation is manipulation in its purest form. Of course, it is pleasant for the aggressor himself, but it has destructive power for relationships. Agree, it is the injured party who should receive consolation and compensation (and in this case it is not you).
Apologies after cheating
This is perhaps one of the most common causes of quarrels among married couples. It is extremely difficult to avoid betrayal if there are regular temptations. If a man was unable to maintain monogamy, and his wife found out about this, you need to act as follows:
- you need to explain to your wife why the betrayal occurred, and that the mistress means nothing to the man;
- you should show fidelity to your wife with all your appearance, not paying attention to other women;
- in the coming weeks you need to turn into the main romantic, give flowers, arrange vacations, making amends in every way;
- It is recommended not to press your beloved, not to demand immediate forgiveness from her, since the offense is too serious;
- you should be persistent in your apologies and not back down, even if the woman says that she will never forgive.
Cheating is a very serious mistake that can result in divorce. The wife will be able to forgive her other half only if she feels sincerity on the part of her chosen one.
How does a wife feel when her husband cheats on her?
A wife who finds out about her husband's infidelity will probably change her attitude towards him. She loved him, trusted him, appreciated him. And now he showed his insulting attitude towards her. The first thing that will change in her is that she will lose trust in the man and confidence in the strength of their relationship. She will be stressed, shocked, in pain, disappointed and suffering.
When getting married, a woman believed that she was behind her husband “like behind a stone wall.” She completely trusted her husband, gave him freedom, and devoted herself to him. But he didn’t appreciate it. He destroyed the confidence his wife had placed in him. Their family has turned from a former fortress into quicksand.
Often women love their husbands very much. They dedicate themselves to them. And when they find out about the betrayal, they become depressed or become so cynical that they reject any possibility of a love relationship. It is on this basis that feminism is born - a direction against men, and not freedom from them.
Among other things, the woman begins to feel unsure of herself. Her husband devalued her by starting to date another woman. It seems to the wife that the reason lies in her unattractiveness and shortcomings, which come to the fore for her, because of which self-esteem and self-doubt fall even more.
Unspoken rules for asking for forgiveness
Psychologists emphasize that there are unspoken rules that will allow you to make your apologies as sincere as possible. Regardless of the offense, it is better to apologize in person and not via SMS. Words spoken with full repentance will always be more important than even the most incredible written messages.
Psychologists also advise not to delay apologies. If a man has done something wrong, then he should forget about pride for a while and say his cherished words. If reconciliation is postponed until better times, the conflict will turn out to be much more serious.
The remaining rules may vary depending on the characteristics of the quarrel. Let's try to sort out the main ones.
How to apologize if it's my fault
It is very easy to offend a woman. Sometimes all it takes is one word or gesture. If a man has committed a crime, he needs to act as follows:
- you should fully admit your guilt, without trying to blame your beloved for something;
- it is necessary to emphasize your repentance;
- the chances of reconciliation will be higher if the man gives some kind of romantic gift;
- if the offense was not serious, you can solve the problem with a joke;
- Often women forget about any grievances if a man takes a big step. For example, if a lover gives a girl an expensive piece of jewelry or fulfills her cherished dream, the girl will most likely forget about any quarrel.
Money often becomes a helper in such a situation, but this does not mean that with its help you can eliminate any conflict. If a man allows himself to hit his significant other, he will not be able to pay off. This is a serious reason for divorce, which means you will have to apologize for a very long time, resorting to romantic gestures and loud promises.
Short SMS messages
If the opportunity arose to return everything back, I wouldn’t think twice about it, I would return it and fix everything. But, since this is impossible, all that remains is to ask for forgiveness, in the hope of your apology. I love you, I'm sorry.
I have no excuse, this realization is driving me crazy. I'm sorry, no, don't even forgive me. Please don't make hasty decisions, let everything be fixed. Infinitely loving you (name).
Oh, my light of eyes, I just can’t forgive myself for the stupid thing I said to you in anger. You don’t deserve to listen to such sayings and I assure you, I said these nasty things to you out of passion. Forgive the fool!
How I want to become a happy person again, but I can’t without your presence in my life. Sorry, my dear woman, let's forget everything and continue to live happily and carefree.
How hopelessly stupid I was when I took actions that could have hurt you. I’m sorry if I humiliated you with my words or insulted you with my actions, if you can forgive, then I’m sure we can put everything back together.
How to apologize if she's at fault
Quarrels may well occur through the fault of the girl herself, but this does not mean that she will want to reconcile. Many ladies believe that a man must take decisive steps, which means that after a silent boycott lasting several days, he will still have to apologize.
What advice can you give in such a situation?
- A man should have a serious conversation with his other half, emphasizing that they are both wrong.
- It is necessary not only to apologize yourself, but also to obtain an apology from her.
- You can arrange a romantic dinner as a sign of reconciliation.
- It is best to consolidate reconciliation with love caresses.
In such a situation, you need to put up with it not immediately, but after a few days. During this time, the spouse either herself will come to the need to apologize, or will reach such a state of moral remorse that she will quickly agree to reconciliation.
Psychologists advise never to reproach your partner or demand that he immediately admit his guilt. Careful and democratic actions are the key to strong relationships. Moreover, in most quarrels both are always to blame.
Everyone knows this
