If suddenly a girl stops answering calls or ignores messages on social networks, many men become overly annoying or, on the contrary, refuse to do anything. Psychologists and pickup artists who specialize in interpersonal relationships are ready to share advice on how to talk to a girl if she doesn’t want to talk.
Men usually spend a lot of time thinking and guessing about what happened and why the girl began to behave this way. Although a sober look at what is happening, an analysis of the relationship with the girl and one’s behavior will be enough to ultimately find the reasons why the chosen one stopped communicating with the man. Knowing the reasons, you can find different options to improve the situation.
Think about why the girl stopped communicating as before
If a man knows firmly and confidently that he is not ready to lose a girl after being ignored by her, he definitely needs to carefully think about the reasons and factors because of which she refuses to communicate. Only by being able to objectively evaluate his actions and words spoken will a man be able to find the true reasons for a girl’s behavior. Most often, if a girl stops communicating as before, the following situations may be the reason for this:
- resentment on her part for the man’s inaction and wrong actions;
- manipulation to achieve any goals, a kind of game “understand me without words”;
- lack of interest and the discovery that the girl’s chosen one began to behave completely differently.
Due to the emotionality and fickleness of the fair sex, many men find it extremely difficult to understand women and their behavior. You need to understand that the decision to refuse communication is not made overnight; often this thought has been brewing in the head for quite a long time. Some girls say directly that they are not happy in a relationship, others are inclined to hint, but not all men manage to understand this in a timely manner.
Reasons for sudden changes in the behavior of the beloved
When a relationship with a woman developed harmoniously, but gradually began to fade away, it’s time to start sounding the alarm. Before you start resuscitating feelings, consider all the possible reasons for sudden changes on the part of your beloved:
- The woman took a break from the tender display of feelings to sort them out. Different tastes and views on life can provoke a lady to reassess her values. Girls who want to start a family take their choice of life partner seriously, so any mistake on his part can make them doubt their choice.
- If a girl suddenly stops contacting her beloved man and communicating with friends, such behavior may indicate problems in her life. When a young lady is not used to crying and complaining about the vicissitudes of fate, she will prefer to solve all the troubles that arise alone. To preserve energy and fortitude for this period, she will exclude entertainment and contacts.
- Men prefer to win women's hearts with their actions and sparkling humor. If the girl stopped communicating as before, it means that the young man’s witty joke could seem offensive to her.
- A lady can abruptly stop communicating with a man because of deception. If a woman has learned the terrible truth that a guy has been trying to hide for a long time, then talking in this case is unnecessary.
- If a girl’s friends told her tall tales about a young man, and she believed them, then the sudden changes in her beloved’s behavior are not surprising.
- The cause of unpleasant changes in a person can be the notorious game of “cat and mouse”. After reading glamor magazines, the lady decided to play with the guy’s feelings, either letting him in or pushing him away.
- Being busy at school or work is a serious reason for reducing the quantity and quality of communication. If a girl has a session or a quarterly report coming up, do not demand increased attention, otherwise you will encounter irritation and aggression from your beloved. Everyone can get tired, including a friend.
- If a woman has stopped communicating with her lover as before, the cause of unpleasant metamorphoses may be banal anger or resentment. Remember if you spoke negatively about the girl’s parents or if you missed her birthday.
- A lady's feelings may cool down due to a flaring passion for another man. Not every young lady can admit this frankly. Fear, confusion in her head and thoughts provoke her to keep the guy in love with her “in reserve.”
Having found out the cause of the problem, it will be easier to make the right decision to eliminate it. The main thing is to forget about intrusiveness and rudeness. Try to calmly discuss all your experiences with your loved one. A heart-to-heart conversation will help put everything in its place.
What to do if a girl begins to communicate less?
In a situation where a girl does not want to communicate with her boyfriend, a man does not need to put pressure on her with intrusive questions, excitement and conversations. Due to the emotionality of the weaker sex, they need to be given time to calm down, otherwise the situation of being ignored will continue for a long time. During this period of time there will be an opportunity to analyze your behavior, words and actions that could offend the girl.
What to do at the very beginning
If a girl suddenly stops communicating, the man needs to make sure that she has not simply lost interest in him and the desire to have something in common. There are often cases when young people communicate, try to please each other, and after some time they realize that they are completely unsuitable for each other. If feelings and a desire to preserve the relationship are present, you need to take a break to calm down and think about a plan for further action.
Regardless of the stage of the relationship and feelings between partners, all girls love decisive men who are ready to take responsibility for themselves and for her. In addition, you need to remember that initiative is the primordial prerogative of men, so even if she says that you infuriate her, there is no need to fold your arms and remain inactive. Knowing the reasons for the breakup, you need to change by working on improving yourself, eliminating the shortcomings that could push her away.
Expert opinion
Elena Druzhnikova
Sexologist. Family relations expert. Family psychologist.
Many men, due to indecision, embarrassment and various prejudices, do not dare to apologize face to face, preferring to do this through SMS messages or correspondence on the Internet. In fact, virtual communication will not be able to convey the range of emotions that comes from the offender to the offended girl. Yes, and she may consider that the man is not serious about her behavior.
Let's move on to action
Knowing the true reasons why the chosen one began to communicate less or completely refuses to maintain contact, a man can decide on a plan of active action. Even if he does not perceive the man’s misdeeds as something serious, the offended girl must be pleasantly surprised with her actions and well-chosen words. First of all, you need to apologize, doing it in person, face to face.
If a girl communicates little, most likely she is tired of words and needs correct and good actions in her direction. You can win someone over with the help of pleasant surprises, small gifts in the form of flowers, sweets, etc. Only by showing that the man sincerely regrets his wrong behavior, because of which the girl stopped communicating without explanation, and also by promising not to repeat this , you can get another chance at a relationship.
Do you know how to get a girl to talk?
Not really
Actions towards a girl should focus not on quality, but rather on quantity. That is, it is better to give her one rose throughout the week with a note apologizing than to give her a bouquet of 7 roses at once and stop acting. You need to be prepared for the fact that she will not forgive immediately and will be capricious for some time; a man can only be patient.
If a girl does not talk to a young guy for no apparent reason, the man does not need to try to find out from her in every possible way what made her behave this way. A face-to-face conversation in calm tones at the level of complete frankness will be enough. Sooner or later, any girl will name the reasons that prompted her to take offense and cold behavior, after which all that remains is to apologize, promising not to repeat such situations.
Reasons why she doesn't write or call first
She doesn't want to seem intrusive
Perhaps this is one of the most common reasons why girls do not write first. Even if you have already made it clear to her in every possible way that you are interested in her, there is a fear in her that she will seem intrusive. In turn, when you send SMS first, she calms down, again and again noting to herself that your interest in her has not disappeared anywhere. As a rule, after this, further dialogue is built quite easily. A girl can develop this behavior on a subconscious level - perhaps she was once rejected by someone, or since childhood she has had an attitude in her head that “decent girls should not run after boys.”
She's afraid of seeming unclaimed
Some girls don't write first because they think that their message will show the guy that they have no fans. Yes, this is such a difficult connection. Some people believe that a potential chosen one should feel a little competition at the initial stage of acquaintance or relationship.
In her understanding it looks like this. She is online, but she is silent - therefore, she is communicating with someone else, which means that she is interesting to someone else. Conclusion: You need to text her if you want her attention. In this case, in fact, there may not be any “other”, but the girl really wants you to be wary of this. This behavior is typical for girls who like to provoke their partner to jealousy.
She's not interested in you
Unfortunately, this outcome is also quite possible. While you think that she is embarrassed to write and is waiting for you to remember about her, the girl simply does not think about you. Not only does she not want to write to you, but she also has no great desire to answer. For this reason, she replies almost every other time, and her messages are not particularly meaningful.
She thinks you're interested in someone else
Perhaps the girl believes that there is a lover in your life, and therefore prefers not to get involved in your relationship and not create problems for you. This situation can happen if you don’t know your interlocutor well and she is not yet very aware of all the details of your personal life. At the same time, on your page on a social network there are photos with another person, or some user actively leaves some likes or comments on your “wall” under your posts.
She doesn't like to communicate online or on the phone.
Perhaps your chosen one is one of those people who use social networks and the phone only to set up a real meeting. It is quite possible that she does not like virtual communication, without eye to eye contact and the like. It is worth noting that few young ladies have this feature, but they still exist.
She has a lot to do
We are talking about a person who has a very busy daily routine. Of course, sometimes she can get distracted and write first, but most often she simply reacts to the messages that come to her. Moreover, she does not do this on purpose - being involved in some business, she really does not record who exactly wrote first, but simply communicates when such an opportunity arises.
How to get a girl to write first?
Often this problem worries fragile couples, when the guy is in love, but the woman maintains the relationship without a spark. The best option is to increase your value in her eyes. A girl never writes to the first man when she is not particularly afraid of his leaving. If your page is extremely poor in other people’s likes and comments, then this clearly hints that you are not yet in much demand. Try to make new acquaintances, post interesting news and pictures more often. Make your personal page popular among women to stir up a hint of jealousy in your beloved.
Many sociable men themselves manage the development of relationships, never missing a moment to call their beloved or send an SMS. For them, the problem of why girls don’t write first practically does not exist. Other guys are terrified to see their own initiative from a woman; incomprehensible silence on the other end of the “line” often leads to irritation or attacks of jealousy that can split a delicate connection. It is better to understand the issue without delay, without waiting for a crisis to occur.
What to do if a girl doesn’t want to communicate at all?
There are situations when a man cannot understand how to get a girl to talk if she is silent. By asking her a question about what happened and what is the reason for her silence, she can not give up her position and remain ignored. In this case, you need to maintain composure, not give up, and after waiting for some time, repeat the question. The main thing is to be firm and not to throw accusations and reproaches at her.
In fact, girls are inclined to manipulate this type not in order to provoke a man, but only to attract attention. Therefore, by overreacting with a showdown, quarrels and pressure, a man will only lose his face in her eyes and respect. Only by moving away, minding his own business and self-development, will a man show the girl whom she is losing because of her grievances.
It’s not for nothing that they say that the more a man loves a woman, the less she likes him. But in this matter, the main thing is not to overdo it, so that the chosen one does not consider the relationship completely impossible. To show your feelings, you need to alternate distances with rapprochements in order to rekindle her interest.
The girl ignores her in contact, should she write to her?
We can talk about both a real lover and a person who is simply interesting and attractive to you at the moment.
If a girl answers messages, but not like before
In this case, it's likely that you don't really have any good reason to worry. Perhaps the decreased activity of the chosen one is connected with some events in her life that have nothing to do with you. What could we be talking about? She has a lot of work, she does her schoolwork, she has problems in her family, she is on vacation, she is busy with something, and so on. If the situation is really related to some kind of employment, then, most likely, everything will soon return to normal.
However, there may be another reason for such changes in behavior. Some girls get tired of communicating on the Internet if the situation is not moving forward. That is, it may be that you are stuck at the stage of courtship, which mainly takes place in VKontakte. She probably wants a real relationship and doesn't want to encourage this type of online romance. It may be that you are already together, but again - you practically don’t see each other, but only share information with each other through Contact - most likely, she is tired of this format of communication.
Some girls begin to answer more dryly than they did before, thereby demonstrating resentment. Think carefully about whether there were any actions in your words and actions that could cause negative emotions on the part of your chosen one.
If a girl suddenly stops communicating
For an abrupt termination of relations and correspondence, of course, there must be a compelling reason. The best way to find out is by making an appointment. If you haven’t had an acquaintance so close that you don’t even know how you can meet her and where you can look for her, then this means that it’s still difficult to call your relationship serious, which means that the girl and I didn’t take them seriously myself.
If a girl blocked me everywhere
If she simply stops answering you, but at the same time leaves the opportunity to write and explain something yourself, then, apparently, in this way you are given a chance to fix everything. However, when a girl not only ignores, but also blocks a guy on social networks or on the phone, this means that she absolutely does not care what he wants to tell her - she has made a firm decision to cut off contact. In this case, you have two options - wait until the situation changes and the girl still gives you access, for example, to her page. This will indicate that she is still ready to communicate with you. However, if your acquaintance is not superficial, it is better, of course, not to wait, but to find another way to talk to her - for example, to meet.
What to do if you piss her off?
When wondering how to get a silent girl to talk, a guy may not immediately detect moments of irritation and anger on her part. In this case, you need to talk frankly with the girl about what happened in the relationship that caused negative emotions. Perhaps she began to communicate less banally due to a loss of interest in her partner, who relaxed and began to behave banally.
It’s easy to be interesting to a girl; there are several ways to develop yourself:
- playing sports and improving your physical fitness;
- reading useful books on self-development;
- passion for new activities;
- increasing the level of qualifications;
- career growth;
- achieving new goals and increasing earnings.
Sooner or later, the girl herself will notice such positive changes in a man, realizing that she has lost a worthy man. It is precisely such purposeful and successful men who win recognition, interest and respect among the fairer sex . All that remains is for the man himself to figure out whether he needs a girl, whether he still has the same feelings for her, so as not to give a chance and vain hope without prospects for the future.
Causes
Why does the girl so suddenly decide to stop communicating? There are usually reasons for this. In fact, there needs to be some visible reason for communication between two people to stop. Of course, it is very unpleasant to realize that there is little communication with the person who is of interest. Let's look at the most common reasons why girls stop talking to guys.
Various flavors
When people have opposing ideas about life, it becomes incredibly difficult for them to understand each other. Sometimes it feels like you are talking to a stranger. Different tastes often give rise to open conflicts in which there can be no winners. To create a strong union, it is necessary that two people look in the same direction, have common judgments and ideas about life. Otherwise, a fight will begin. Constant quarrels incredibly exhaust partners and do not allow them to enjoy each other’s company.
Real employment
In some cases, the girl will communicate less with the guy than before, due to her work or study load. If a young man knows that his dear friend has started a session or is submitting a quarterly report, do not be offended. There is no need to demand increased attention to yourself, this can only cause genuine irritation on her part. If her busyness is real, then it means that she really cannot now devote enough time for private interaction.
It takes very little tact and patience from a young man to understand this. When it comes to taking tests and exams, many students forget to eat on time, let alone spend many hours with the person they like. Busyness doesn't last forever. You need to try to accept it as inevitable and wait a little.
Losing interest
In some cases, the girl suddenly stops communicating with the guy. He writes tender messages to her on her mobile phone, hoping to get an answer. She openly ignores any messages, as if they have absolutely nothing to do with her. When a guy passes her in the corridor of an educational institution, the young lady pretends not to notice him. Why is this happening? What's the matter?
As sad as it may be, we have to admit the obvious. The girl is not interested, she does not want to continue communication. Due to certain circumstances, not every representative of the fair sex can say out loud everything that she really thinks. Many are afraid of offending, seeming impolite, or simply do not want to tell the truth until a specific moment.
Resentment
This reason is quite serious and often occurs in life. A girl can feel offended for any reason: a guy didn’t keep a promise, didn’t do something, didn’t live up to expectations. There is a category of people who experience negative emotions for any reason. If a girl is one of them, she becomes extremely difficult to please. It must be remembered that resentment is a powerful weapon for manipulation.
With the help of this tool, many representatives of the fair sex strive to realize their desires. Some succeed due to the fact that men cannot stand women’s tears, pouting lips and generally dissatisfied facial expressions. If a girl has stopped communicating because of resentment, you need to find out what exactly upset her so much. Perhaps there is still a way to improve the situation?
Intention to separate
Sometimes it happens that girls wait until the last minute, without announcing to the guy their intention to end all relations with him. Silence of this kind acts as a kind of defensive reaction that does not allow the existing problem to be detected in time. The girl continues to pretend to be an inaccessible person, and the young man is at a loss, not knowing what he can really do. We need to think not about why the girl doesn’t want to see me, but to face the truth. Sometimes this can be very painful to do due to lack of experience in such situations.
How can a man properly ignore a woman he likes?
It is important to understand that women usually use ignoring specifically for something; it has a specific goal that your interlocutor wants to achieve. So what are the options? Perhaps this is how a woman expresses resentment, wants revenge, or hopes to end your relationship. As soon as you fully understand why a woman behaves this way, something else will become clear to you - how to act in such a difficult matter.
However, do not rule out the possibility that this person is not only ignoring you. Some women get tired of problems or uncertainty in their personal lives, after which they decide to take some kind of break - that is, to distance themselves from any personal contacts with men. In this case, you should act delicately, show your chosen one that you are ready to wait and understand the reasons for her fears.
If we are talking about an adult woman, then it is possible that she is tired of any correspondence and “virtual love”. Try to transfer your courtship into real life, and act like that. The older a woman is, the less time she usually wants to spend on correspondence, which in many cases simply ends in nothing. Show your readiness for a real relationship.
Advice from a psychologist when a guy stops writing
Before continuing reading, ask yourself the question: “is it so important for a guy to write to you?” Very often I observe a situation where stopping communication with a man is only for the benefit of the woman. You may think that this person will not bring anything good into your life and fate is preparing someone else for you. If he now, from time to time, ignores you, what will happen next?
Wait a week
When a man stops writing, don’t rush to draw conclusions; maybe an emergency happened and he doesn’t really have the opportunity to get in touch. Therefore, there is no need to send hundreds of messages every two minutes about ignoring it. Take some time for yourself, go for a walk, rest, and refrain from texting him.
Manifestation of ignoring
Pretend that you don't care whether the guy texts you or not. Showing a little ignorance is sometimes useful. Hide the fact that you want to communicate with him and are waiting for a message from him. Control yourself and stay calm. If no more than a week has passed, do not write. If a guy has feelings for you or at least minimal interest, he will contact you on his own.
Final message
When your acquaintance happened quite recently, or you communicated only on the Internet, without live communication, you can safely stop initiating communication. Why waste your time on a person who doesn't want to waste his time on you? If you were in a relationship with a guy, then write something like this: “I decided that you and I look at life differently. Be happy.". Gather your strength and put an end to the relationship. Behave with dignity and do not belittle your own importance.
Keep your messages short
If a man decides to resume communication, behave politely and show seriousness. If you start reprimanding him for ignoring him, this will make the situation worse. But also, if you really have something meaningful to say, say it. The main thing is to avoid conflicting communication.
Reciprocate
When you notice that a guy only responds to messages, but does not write himself. Don't bombard him with your messages, have normal communication. Start replying to his messages less often and don’t write first. It is necessary for the guy to understand that this model of communication is not acceptable with you.
Focusing on your own life
Sometimes there are situations when a guy does not write to a girl. It happens that many people encounter this. Instead of analyzing and looking for reasons for such behavior, get busy with your life. Why waste your nerves? If you can engage in self-development and spend time usefully for yourself. I'm sure you want to change your manicure, visit your friends or go to the gym. Respect yourself and your time.
Know when to leave
Take this advice with special responsibility. When a guy decides to play, if I want, I’ll write, if I don’t want, I won’t write... Why do you need such inconvenience? The guy is behaving badly now, and it will only get worse. It’s better to immediately stop communicating with him and continue a normal life, without wasting your nerves.
Sources
- https://AlfaMan.org/otnosheniya/76-pochemu-devushki-ne-pishut-pervymi.html
- https://prostolove.com/tipichnye-prichiny-pochemu-devushki-ne-pishut-pervymi/
- https://love-is.org/devushka-perestala-obshhatsya-kak-ranshe/
- https://apatii.net/otnosheniya/devushka-vnezapno-perestala-obshhatsya
- https://Favoritca.com/otnosheniya-s-devushkoy/obschenie-s-devushkoy/pocemu-devuska-ne-piset-pervoj.html
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