Human life path: patterns and problems

A person’s life path is a complex road, consisting of forks and intersections with other paths. The branching point is the choices we make every day, and the crossroads is meeting other people and their role in our lives.

Each of us goes through our own path. Everyone's trials and life lessons, victories and defeats are different. You will learn about what patterns are found on it and what basic mistakes are made from our material. We are sure the information will be useful to you: forewarned is forearmed.

Key concepts of a person’s life path

Psychologist Charlotte Bühler put forward a theory according to which internal and external events make up life. In this regard, she proposed the concept of “personal life path.” A person is motivated primarily by the desire for self-realization, the search for oneself in creativity.

There are three lines along which life passes:

a series of external events, that is, objective logic;
experiences that are associated with these events, that is, subjective logic;
performance results.

It is necessary to distinguish between such concepts as a person’s life path, life time, life cycle. Some people mistakenly believe that they are the same thing.

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Here's how these concepts are defined:

Lifetime. This is the name of human life as a biological organism. This is the period from birth to death.
Life cycle. These include periods of development that repeat at a certain interval. There are biological (ontogenesis), social (socialization, adaptation), biosocial (change of generations, that is, essentially a change of social roles along with the stages of growing up) cycles, as well as family and working life.
Life path. Determines the development of an individual, its progress.

That is, a cycle differs from a path in that it has a sequence of stages. The meaning is inherent from the beginning and remains unchanged. The path can have many options, branches, and their choice is made by the person himself.

The similarity of the life paths of different people manifests itself in sensitive, or critical, periods. At this time, a person experiences increased vulnerability to social and biological factors.

The only thing in which the life paths of different people are similar is the sensitive (critical) periods, in which a person becomes more vulnerable. Another name for them is age-related, or normative, crises. In other words, these are life turns that are provoked by serious social changes: entering school or university, joining the army, getting married, and so on. At such moments, a mental restructuring of the personality occurs that is significant for her.

What prevents choice - how to remove barriers

The problem of choice is a common cause of stagnation in life, leading to missed chances. In such a state, a person is not able to objectively see effective ways. This means that the issue of regressive circumstances must first be resolved.

What could it be:

The state of loss - a loved one, an old status, an important job.
Limitations in the form of external circumstances - health, finances, excessive obligations, etc.
Dependence on authoritative opinion - overbearing relatives who deprive you of progress towards your dream with words or behavior, toxic friends or loved ones.

These are external circumstances that hinder success. But there are also internal ones that prevent you from choosing your path in life even when all the necessary conditions are there. And neither one nor the other can “dissolve” without intervention. Their presence indicates the need for serious work on oneself.

What concerns internal problems:

reluctance to lose the familiar comfort zone;
lack of ideas about the ultimate goal;
acquired lack of self-confidence, fear of failure against the background of complexes;
shift of values against the backdrop of resounding success (it is sometimes more difficult to accept happiness with dignity than loss).

All these problems can arise at any age, and at any age their solution leads to the discovery of the true paths of life.

A specialist will tell you how to deal with gestalts.

Stages of life's journey

According to Charlotte Buhler's classification, stages are distinguished taking into account the development of the main spheres of personality: social, psychological, labor, family, professional.

There are five stages in the life path of every person:

From birth to 16-20 years. At this stage there is no script yet, because the person has not experienced any significant events. He doesn't work yet, he doesn't have his own family.
From 16-20 to 30 years. This period is characterized by active actions in the love, family and work spheres. Goals and plans are drawn up, specific dreams appear. There is a search for oneself. The person is determined and at the same time unsure of himself.
From 30 to 50 years. You could call it maturity. At this stage, a profession has already been chosen, a family has been created, the purpose and meaning of life has been found, and personal self-esteem is being formed.
From 50 to 70 years. Gradual decline in all areas of life. Instead of work - pension. Children most often grow up and live independently. Time to take stock and analyze your achievements. Then the person begins to look for what social activity to engage in at this stage. He tends to be nostalgic.
From 70 years old. More time is spent on rest. Almost no new plans are made; on the contrary, the past is analyzed more often. Satisfaction occurs when reality matches the goals set in youth. If not, then the person is usually extremely disappointed.

Bühler's classification does not coincide with those proposed by other specialists or associated with age-related personality development. Erik Erikson, for example, notes 8 stages that are characterized by a certain crisis in a person’s life.

Erikson's classification is as follows:

Conflict of trust and mistrust. From 0 to 1.5 years. The stage when the child develops trust in the world and parents. If the father and mother are warm, caring and affectionate enough, then the attitude will be trusting. Otherwise, he will not trust others.
Conflict between autonomy and shame. From 1.5 to 3-4 years. Feeling independent and active makes the child satisfied. However, with frequent punishment, including verbal punishment, the child begins to experience a chronic feeling of shame, doubts his abilities, and does not want to be independent.
Initiative and guilt. From 3-4 to 6 years. Curiosity helps a child make first plans. Against this background, he takes initiative. If parents block a child’s curiosity, calling him obsessive, then instead of initiative, a feeling of guilt appears.
Hard work and inferiority complex . From 6 to 11 years. At this stage, it is important for the child to earn attention and recognition. Then he makes attempts to organize work and educational activities. Constant criticism and unfavorable comparisons with other children from parents lead to a feeling of inferiority in the child, and the desire to work does not manifest itself.
Identification and uncertainty. From 12 to 18 years old. The teenager begins to search for himself, his image and role. He is trying to find himself and understand who he is, what he needs, where he is going. If he cannot determine himself, he suffers because he does not know what he wants to be, what he can be, what he wants to do and what he can do.
Social interaction and isolation. From 20 to 45 years. The period of searching for a loved one, someone to take care of. If there were no close relationships, then most likely the person remains lonely.
Altruism and egoism. From 45 to 60 years. There is an understanding of how interested a person is in the life of generations, the degree of readiness to care for others and take into account their interests is revealed, or, conversely, to worry only about one’s own comfort and live for one’s own pleasure.
Life satisfaction and despair. From 60 years old. A person decides whether he lived his life in vain or not. If it seems to him that his path was holistic and complete, that he has done enough for society or himself, then he feels calm in anticipation of his end. But if there is no such feeling, then a person may experience despair, fears, including fear of death.

For any individual, the path of life plays an important role. It can be viewed from different points of view.

Option 1

The statement that the path of life is a constant choice is undeniable. Every day people are forced to make choices: who to be friends with, who to love, what to do. These questions make you think and weigh the pros and cons. The right choice leads a person to life satisfaction and happiness. This is confirmed by numerous literary examples.

The hero of the novel - L. N. Tolstoy's epic "War and Peace" Pierre Bezukhov is in constant search for life. He ponders the questions: what is good and what is bad? He is concerned about the problem of love and hate. What is evil and what is good in this life? Are these concepts relative or absolute? Pierre's communication with Anatole Kuragin and others like him leads him to doubts and denial of ideals. The hero's acquaintance with the Freemasons brings him out of his spiritual crisis. He understands that there is only one highest wisdom; it does not imply choice. You need to believe, improve, and conscience helps you achieve this. In all situations of choice, one must be guided only by conscience. Having determined for himself to engage in active good, Bezukhov continues his previous life “with the same hobbies and promiscuity.” Moral ideals do not coincide with life practice. The Masons did not share the idea of the common good that Pierre was striving for. He moves away from them. Trying to make a choice between passions and virtue, the hero decides that there is no need to give up passions. They just need to be directed in a good direction. When the Patriotic War of 1812 began, he made another choice and joined the national struggle against Napoleon. Pierre's entire life path consists of a series of choices. The search for truth for the hero ends in the unification and conjugation of everything that exists. Based on this, ideally, good and evil, love and hate should not exist, they should form a single whole. Having made his main choice, Pierre finds happiness.

The hero of M. A. Sholokhov’s work “Quiet Don”, Grigory Melekhov, is also in a situation of constant doubt. At the beginning of the novel, he is tormented by the torment of choosing between two women Aksinya and Natalya. This problem gradually increases in size, over time the hero has to choose between passion and family. He chooses passion. Grigory leaves the family for Aksinya. He destroys the Melekhov family traditions that have been created over decades, which his father zealously guarded. The collapse of the Melekhov family structure coincides with the destruction of universal human traditions. A civil war begins in the country, pitting brother against brother, father against son. Gregory fights first on the side of the whites, then goes over to the reds. He struggles to understand whose side is right. This choice tires him. The hero dreams of peaceful peasant labor, and not of senseless bloodshed. The hero's life passes in endless tossing. He finds peace only after returning home. Of his relatives, he only had a sister and a son. The work ends with the scene of Gregory's return and his meeting with his son. He finally found what he had been striving for all these years. His goal is home, native land and family. This is his main life choice.

Thus, we can conclude that life is a constant choice. It involves working on oneself, the torments of doubt, and making decisions. His life and destiny depend on what a person chooses. He decides to be good or evil, happy or unhappy. Much is in our hands, so important decisions must be balanced

When determining the purpose of life and moving towards it, it is important not to make mistakes. The works of the great classics of Russian literature also teach us this.

The problem of finding a person's life path

A person’s choice of life path remains his own. This is his responsibility, and a spontaneous scenario is unacceptable. To make a choice, you need to analyze the conditions that surround the individual, his behavior in accordance with social norms. Both the person himself and society participate in the formation of an individual scenario.

The life path is influenced by personality traits, abilities, desires, interests, as well as psychological, social and age factors. As an example, we can cite different situations when in one society early marriages are accepted and parents themselves find a spouse for their child, while in another society they are given the right to choose a partner for themselves.

When it comes to searching for a path in life, it first of all means searching for the meaning and purpose of life. The main question: is it possible to find it and change your destiny? Of course, but only if you understand that the owner of your life is you, and the responsibility for everything that happens to you lies entirely with you. Therefore, it is important to be able to analyze your failures, determine what exactly is responsible for them, and correct mistakes. It is necessary to understand your actions and understand what consequences they entail, find cause-and-effect relationships and ask the question not “why?”, but “why, for what?”.

Finding a path in life means realizing yourself in all areas, doing what you like, finding hobbies, a place in society, a loved one. This can be done by finding a balance between desires, abilities and responsibilities, that is, I want, I can and I must. Each point needs to be considered in more detail.

Professional self-determination. In other words, you need to make a list that contains answers to the following questions:

What do you like to do?
what can you do, even theoretically?
Which of these bring good income and/or public approval?

Compare the resulting list with the list of professions that are in demand today, and also see if there are vacancies for them in your region. After studying the labor market, you will be able to choose a suitable occupation for yourself, which will also be stable and well paid.

Personal and social life. Not everyone has a profession as their priority. Someone is looking for the meaning of life and the purpose of their existence. Therefore, you need to focus on your desires, social skills and life principles. As a result, you will have three lists. See if they have common ground. If not, then perhaps you should phrase your points more specifically. Try replacing the idea “I want to earn a lot” with “I want to be a sought-after professional with a successful practice.” If you have written “You need to see only the good,” then correct it to “You need to make the best of troubles,” “I must work hard,” to “My activities must be effective.”

You must have a vision that reflects you as an individual, a professional and a human being. As for the first point, it means knowing and accepting one’s own character, individual and psychological characteristics, temperament, etc. Being professional is how you seek recognition. In the latter case, you need to determine what place you occupy in society and what you want to occupy, what your social roles are and what attitudes, principles of self-expression, beliefs, means and way of life you are trying to achieve the goal. In simple words, what do you want to get from the world and can take from it, and what do you want and can give to it.

A number of actions aimed at understanding the path of life help the search for a goal:

Are you satisfied with your life and what is wrong with it if the answer is “no”? Analyze this point to look for a problem in a narrow area or specific situation. Think about what you don’t like – your job or just the specific place you currently occupy?
Take the Schwartz test. It will help you clarify your life priorities and determine where you will feel comfortable.
Use visualization and free situations to find your true desires. All you need to do is relax and close your eyes. Then imagine what happens to you in 6-10 years. Answer the questions: where are you, what are you doing, who and what is near you? Pay special attention to details.
Think about the dreams you've ever had, including childhood dreams, weird ones, even crazy ones. Make a list and reflect on why you abandoned one or another of them. Is it possible to fulfill at least one of them today?
After that, write down your potential goals based on the previous list. Mark next to each item which skills you have to achieve and which ones you can obtain.
You will need to make several more lists, taking into account the previous ones: activities that you are willing to do for free; something you will do only for payment; something you can do to earn income and for free. You need to strive for the items on the very first list.
Now you need to make a plan that will help you achieve your goal. Each step should be described in as much detail as possible. It is important to do it every day, without delay. For example, if you understand what profession interests you, then today you can look for where and how to get it.

One of the important points in finding a path is the absence of imitation and copying of other people's success. Uniqueness is a characteristic feature of a person. Despite the same desire to be happy, everyone follows their own path to its fulfillment. No life path repeats another.

"I'll finish school and..."

Almost every student dreams of finishing their studies as quickly as possible. The problem of his life’s path does not seem to concern him. It is better to write an essay on this topic for high school students, or rather, graduates. Everyone is young, cheerful, happy. After all, freedom will soon come: no teachers, no tests, no supervision from parents, no diaries with comments and grades.

It is advisable to explain what difficulties may await them in the future. What advice can you give to students so that they don't break down when things get tough? You can give examples from your youth. What mistakes happened. Having given examples, one must conclude by saying: “Everything is decided in life. Yesterday was bad, so it’s necessary. But today everything got better.” White, gray and black stripes are like a change in the weather. This is what the path of life consists of. An essay-reasoning on the topic “How will I respond to a problem” is, so to speak, a continuation. Let the student think about how he will act at one time or another, how he will react.

Such a topic should not just be an essay that is written, graded for it, and then forgotten. It is advisable to talk with children seriously, based on the results of the written words. “The Path of Life” is a rather serious essay that requires further communication. A talented teacher or psychologist should help children understand many things.

Development of a person’s personal qualities along the path of life

Finding a path in life implies self-actualization, which, in turn, means that a person reveals and uses his talents, abilities, and opportunities to the maximum. All you need for this is faith in your strength, an adequate concept of your “I” and appropriate self-esteem, as well as self-regulation skills. The main actions through which a person finds his place, what a person’s life path consists of, are self-knowledge and self-respect.

A. Maslow drew up a portrait of a self-actualized person:

he has self-love and self-acceptance;
he accepts others, the world, nature;
adequately perceives reality;
natural, open, independent;
knows how to objectively assess reality;
feels cohesiveness with other people;
builds deep interpersonal relationships;
distinguishes between means and ends, good and evil;
has a democratic character;
has an adequate sense of humor and self-irony.

Our thinking, worldview, habits and actions are what guide a person on the path of life. Some prefer to create, others prefer to destroy. Some are pessimists and prone to victimization, others are leaders and winners. Not everyone is able to build a happy path if they encounter traumas, neuroses, or have complexes.

Listen to desires

This is what a person needs to do first if he is thinking about how to find a path to a new life. Desires are part of our nature. They are individual and changeable, each with their own. But they are all social in nature. And desires, thanks to the conscious activity of a person and his thinking, sooner or later are reborn into certain life goals. Which determine the meaning of existence.

A person can determine the right path in life if he listens to himself. To what he wants. Strong desires always become goals, since they are a powerful stimulating energy for any human activity - be it creativity, business, or interpersonal relationships.

6 main obstacles in life's journey

It seems to you that the target is close, you can practically see it, but for some reason you cannot get closer to it, because barriers are preventing you:

Barrier 1. Fear of failure.

How will I do something? What if nothing works out for me? I don’t know how, I don’t know, I haven’t tried to do this yet, so how can I accomplish something?

What if I start and everything goes wrong? So what should I do then?

I don’t need anything new, I’ll do what I’ve already done and it worked for me. And then, as you can see, suddenly something will work out.

Of course, no action is needed, it is better to hide from problems. Just think about this. Failure scares you - but what is the reason? You tried, you didn't succeed. And this is absolutely normal for everyone. Try further. And so on until you reach the goal. And it's okay!

Barrier 2. Jump over the abyss.

You want to achieve any goal right away, immediately. Quit your job, sell your apartment, get a divorce - and when you no longer have obligations, the time will come for your dream.

But it’s also worth thinking about the mundane: how and on what you will live, for example, or about other everyday issues. Do you want everything at once? But do you need to rush? After all, you can move towards your dream measuredly, calmly, and with confidence. Even if in small steps. You cannot jump to the fifth floor from the first. But step by step, you will certainly be there.

Barrier 3: You discuss the successes of others.

But this is serious. How many strange individuals are around you doing and achieving something? How can you resist talking about them with understanding friends in order to jointly brand these bad people with shame!

How can you calmly look at them, running around on dates, buying new ones - absolutely tasteless! - things and doing as you want! This requires immediate discussion and condemnation! And it’s impossible not to immediately share it with everyone you know?

- What are you talking about! It was she who came in a terrible green blouse with terrible roses! Or not in green? And without roses? Doesn't matter!

And then they spend hours discussing the words and actions of other people and their attitude towards them. But is it only possible to talk about loved ones and relatives? After all, there are so many notable people living in the world: actors, politicians, bloggers. What about VIPs? Or even the family of the Queen of England? Did you hear what Meghan or Prince Harry did?

Yes, yes, everyone else is wrong. They don't do things the way you do. And you know exactly how to do it. However, is your dream somehow connected with all this?

Barrier 4. I have no time.

– When should I do this? I don’t have time at all?

– What about your dream?

– What will happen to her will wait.

Of course, she won’t disappear anywhere, she’ll wait. But if you are not on the path to your dream now, does that mean you are on the path to someone else’s? While yours is waiting for its time, another one is being realized? Do you really need this?

Barrier 5. Brainwashing with soap.

Anyone who sells something wants to sell it at all costs. Direct advertising, as it turns out, doesn't help much. However, a universal remedy exists. It is enough to convince a person and influence him. Then the person will buy what is required. Every evening, millions of gullible viewers happily allow themselves to be convinced of the need for many goods and services.

The simplest formula applies here: “If you buy nonsense, you find happiness. I took the pill and got better. I bought the ointment and all the women are at your feet (it works the other way around too).” And the potential buyer completely trusts her. This effect can also be used to create TV series.

The procedure becomes a habit. Therefore, the viewing of the next episode begins. But does this really help you achieve your dreams?

Barrier 6. Not today.

There are no more barriers! It's time to make your dream come true. Don’t say: just not now, because I’m not in the mood, what will I do next, is it worth rushing at all, if you can start on Monday or the first of the month, on your birthday or New Year... but why now? And we ourselves put off and put off the dream. Not today!

No, today! At least one step forward. Just make a phone call or write it down in your diary. No matter what, movement is important.

Heroes of "War and Peace" in search of the meaning of life

Everyone wants to live a decent life. At any age, a person dreams of good things. In their essays about the path of life, schoolchildren who have not yet acquired sufficient knowledge, having gone through only a small period of life, write about their choice, without imagining what awaits them ahead. This is good. This is a reason to think, even if the essay is written in someone else’s words and much is not always clear in the actions of literary heroes. But their destinies, written by the master, will make it possible to understand that the main thing is to have a clear goal and go towards it.

An example of this is the fate of the heroes of War and Peace. Pierre's life path is a spiritual path of searching for his place in life, full of suffering, mistakes and disappointments, which led to love and happiness. For his spiritual work was not in vain, he learned to understand people, appreciate the true and reject the false. He, an illegitimate child, deprived of a family, the love of his parents, was an eccentric who was laughed at and not taken seriously. Having become a Freemason, he was deeply disappointed.

Having become the owner of a huge fortune, he suddenly becomes a person who was admired in person, but behind his back they continued to consider him worthless. He became acquainted with flattery, fawning, ingratiation, being well aware of this. Love for Helen made him unhappy, because he understood that this woman simply could not love. She uses him for her own purposes by cheating on him. Only after going through French captivity and falling in love with Natasha, he understood the meaning of life, feeling his need and finding happiness.

Most schoolchildren prefer to write essays about Bolkonsky’s life path, since it is more understandable. This main character, lovingly described by L. Tolstoy, unlike his friend Pierre Bezukhov, is handsome and respected in society. He knows what is necessary in life. He did not need to look for the meaning of life; he saw it in serving the Fatherland, caring for his elderly father and raising his young son. Endowed with all the positive qualities, knowing the path to follow, was he happy? After all, it is simple human happiness, according to Bezukhov, that is the highest meaning of life.