Devastation or healing emptiness?
If we use a geometric metaphor, then a person’s life path bears little resemblance to a straight line. Rather, it can be compared to a series of sharp jumps separated by smooth plateaus. We usually perceive periods of such surges as crises, because the plateau, that is, stability, is the main thing that gives our ego a sense of security, predictability and the ability to control the course of events. And in such periods this is impossible.
Nevertheless, crises are inevitable and even necessary, since man is a developing being. And any development does not happen smoothly, but in leaps and bounds: if you have mastered the current level, move on to the next one. At each level, everything is new: new requirements and new tasks. And although the skills are there, they are old, from the previous level. Therefore, at first the feeling is that everything is in chaos.
During such periods, a person’s mind, being unable to fit what is happening into any familiar pattern, most often first gives way to violent emotions, and then simply switches off: the past feels like a burnt-out field, one doesn’t want anything, life seems to have lost its meaning and direction, and one’s own state most often defined as devastation. The condition is neither bad nor good, rather none. Emotions and thoughts remained in memories. Emptiness.
How to survive in such a deep crisis?
In Chinese, the character for “crisis” consists of two characters that have independent meanings. One of them means “danger”, and the second means “opportunity”. There is deep wisdom in this, since the outcome of a crisis depends on the approach to living it and on the worldview of a person as a whole.
I will not list all the strategies that are most often used by people who find themselves in such situations, since that is not the purpose of this article, I will list only a few of them:
- “lay low and wait it out”;
- try to compensate for the internal emptiness with external activity, new relationships, travel experiences;
- sometimes - consult a psychiatrist for drug treatment, since the condition is similar to depression.
It is important that in the long term, all these strategies do not work, since they are aimed at suppressing the true cause, and not eliminating it.
Such states can arise not only at rare turning points of crises, but also in much more prosaic situations, for example, as a result of the fulfillment of a strong desire, which for a long time gave meaning to life and served as “fuel” for motivation.
In psychological jargon, a term has even been formed - achievement depression, and in scientific terms - “Rotenberg-Altov syndrome”, named after the scientists who discovered this feature of the human psyche.
The point is that a person, having spent enormous efforts to achieve a goal that seemed main, experiences only short-term satisfaction. However, it soon gives way to a state of devastation and loss of meaning in life. I defended my dissertation - what next? I got a promotion at work - what next? This period often becomes very stressful and even dangerous to health, as psychological stability decreases and immunity weakens.
Devastation can also occur as a result of unresolved internal conflict.
I'll give you an example.
Catherine regularly put off household chores until the last minute, and then did them at the last moment in a state of extreme stress. As a result, each time she fell into a state of exhaustion, which, as it turned out later, was a state of devastation. But she herself did not realize this.
During our studies, we came to the conclusion that her self-destructive behavior was caused by an unconscious need for contact with herself, with her essence. Therefore, her subconscious was divided into two parts: one wanted to correspond to the ideas of a good wife and housewife, and the second sabotaged the first, since it considered household chores an obstacle to contact with itself.
Not realizing her internal conflict, she tried to shift some of her responsibilities to her husband. As a result, a serious family conflict arose, leading to a relationship crisis. This was the reason for contacting me.
All the above examples are the result of the loss of the true goal and true meaning of life and its replacement by one or another “substitute.”
The wisest decision in such situations is to take care of yourself, both from the body and your inner world, because the state of devastation, although unpleasant and even frightening, is not bad at all.
Any crisis, of course, if approached incorrectly, can also become a danger. But if you treat it correctly, it contains the richest possibilities for healing, development, and even transition to a new, higher level of development. This level can be revealed if you master certain methods of working with yourself.
I will talk about some of these methods in this article. And at the end I will share an exercise that you can practice on your own. But first…
Problems are the imprint of our actions
According to the saying: “If I knew where I fell, I would spread a straw,” we all want to know the moments in which we could make a mistake and cause damage for later life. How good that would be. No one would ever find themselves in an unpleasant situation, everyone would be healthy, rich, successful, happy. But, unfortunately, it is impossible to predict what will happen in a minute.
And what actions of ours can cause negative consequences. In addition, human nature follows the “reason” of its momentary desires, and then you have to clean up everything that it brings. But experienced comrades, parents, and friends tell us what could be. Why don’t we listen to them, don’t heed their valuable advice. That's the thing, instead of learning from other people's mistakes, we do it from our own. And this is also studying.
After all, we cannot find separate time to study. Therefore, compensation occurs for what we have missed. This is how we go to university to get a good salary, grow up the career ladder, start a family, make friends with people so as not to be alone, etc. If we did not have an urgent need for achievements, actions and deeds, no one would lift a finger - we would live by inertia and that’s it.
This is why the problem should be taken as a free but very valuable lesson and the science should be learned correctly.
Basic Paradigm Shift
Thomas Kuhn's term “basic paradigm shift” is now widely used in science. Many are sure that it defines the times in which we live. “Paradigm” is a word of Greek origin and translated means “example, sample or model.”
Thomas Kuhn himself introduced this term to describe the structure of scientific revolutions, but very soon they began to describe any revolutionary changes in consciousness, in particular a change in basic ideas about life.
Today we are witnessing just such a process - first in the field of natural sciences, and then in the most fundamental ideas about the nature of reality. I like to call this the transition from the ego world paradigm to a holistic, spiritual worldview - the soul paradigm.
The structure of a person’s inner world can be graphically represented as a hierarchy of levels of the mind, but each person perceives his inner world differently depending on his worldview.
Although everyone's worldview is unique in many ways, two types of worldviews can be distinguished - spiritual and materialistic. The differences between these types are so dramatic that they should be considered two different paradigms of life. I call them the soul paradigm and the ego paradigm.
In the ego model, deprived of connection with the basis - the Higher Self, security must be achieved solely through personal efforts, and therefore is identical to predictability and the possibility of as complete control as possible.
If there is no predictability and control is impossible, the ego perceives this state as a danger to life. Therefore, falling into a state of devastation during a crisis, the ego, tuned to fight, looks for ways to overcome this state. This, of course, increases stress, and stress increases tension, devastation and fear.
Thus, a person, living in the ego paradigm, and therefore identifying himself with it, regularly falls into the funnel of stress with all the ensuing consequences.
How to deal with this condition?
If you help a person feel the support of the Higher Self and the possibility of relying on it, thereby expanding the idea of \u200b\u200bhimself, then the vicious circle is broken. Stress gradually decreases, and the opportunity arises to perceive the unknown not with fear, but as a source of opportunity. Then the crisis is positively resolved by a transition to a state of co-creation.
This can be done using certain methods, which can generally be described as meditation on space.
In the ego paradigm that dominated for millennia, man identified himself with the body, which was felt not as a living being, but as a mechanism (hence the mechanistic approach of medicine to its treatment), while the conscious mind was concentrated mainly in the head. Space was perceived as an objective given, a living environment.
However, in reality, only 5% of a person's resources are available to the conscious mind, and it is not limited to it. Most of the mind belongs to the sphere of the subconscious and is not realized directly, but through emotions and sensations of the body (that is, we are not aware of it, but we feel it, sense it).
But there is an even larger mind, a superconscious one, and it manifests itself precisely through space. Therefore, it is often called Cosmic or Supreme.
The conscious mind of the ego is closed within itself, therefore it experiences life situations, perceiving them as “what happened”, and does not have the opportunity to realize their educational meaning (which is sometimes even denied by the mind). The mind compensates for this by creating meaning artificially, based on conscious goals (getting a position, title, achieving wealth and status, etc.). When the illusions dissipate and it is discovered that these meanings were illusory, as in the “depression of achievement” mentioned above, then devastation sets in. The ego-mind remains without purpose and meaning of existence.
Coming into awareness of the body - we will learn how to do this in the process of performing the exercise given at the end of the article - opens access to the subconscious, which makes it possible to process emotions and sensations. But to an even greater extent, access to true meanings opens through the expansion of awareness into space.
From a neuroscience perspective, awareness of space allows the brain to switch from beta waves, characteristic of conscious activity, and even high-frequency beta waves, characteristic of stress, to alpha waves, corresponding to a state of relaxation, and even theta waves, corresponding to deep immersion. inner world. Therefore, for thousands of years, meditation and prayer have served as the main means of comprehending higher meanings and reuniting with the Higher Self, with the soul.
It is clear that it is impossible to cover such a broad topic in one article. I'll just illustrate how this works using an example from a session with a talented woman.
Why are moments of crisis needed?
As we already know, it is by no means impossible to live life without problematic periods. But we shouldn’t treat them so harshly; we should understand that we need them. There is no need to exclaim at every occasion, “Lord, why do I need this!” If a crisis occurs, it means there is something for it.
We flatter ourselves and believe that we are soft and fluffy, and all around us are adventurers, aggressors, greedy people, spiteful people, slanderers, etc. We should accept all problems as punishment, and as a lesson, thanks to which we will no longer step on such “rake”. In order to understand what has been said, we need to study our crises as if from the outside.
