A person is not just a biological organism that needs to satisfy such basic needs as air, food, sleep, etc. Each of us constantly experiences certain emotions, and this is very good, because it is emotions that make us living people. Without emotions, we would be soulless robots, performing all actions automatically.
Although almost all psychologists advise not to hold back your emotions and throw them out, few of them raise the issue of self-control and emotional balance. A person who does not know how to control his emotions is somewhat like a car without brakes! Such a car drives along the road at maximum speed and does not notice any signs. How long can a vehicle without brakes run at full speed? Until it collides with another car and causes an accident.
If we do not learn to control our emotions, then they will not create, but destroy us from the inside! Self-control is a very useful and necessary skill if you want to change your life for the better, find a common language with the people around you, find yourself and become a spiritually developed, happy and free person.
Emotions cannot be kept to yourself, but they must be expressed in the right place, at the right time and in the right way, otherwise you can overnight destroy everything that you have been striving for so long and what you have strived so hard for. The fact is that emotions can take us by surprise at the most inopportune and crucial moment, because they are unpredictable and spontaneous.
To prevent emotions from preventing us from acting correctly and wisely, we must be able to manage them! How to learn to control your emotions? In this article we will look at the most popular and effective techniques and exercises.
Be aware of your emotions
If you want to learn how to manage your emotions, then first you need to learn to be aware of them. You need to look at any situation that arises in your life objectively and as if from the outside. First, emotionally distance yourself from the problem, analyze exactly what emotions this problem evokes in you, and then mentally or in writing record your conclusions.
Give yourself a full account and be clearly aware of what is happening around you. This can only be done if you do not give in to emotions, but pull yourself together, calm your soul and begin to think rationally. This can be done with the help of special meditation or proper breathing.
“How will I know if I have become aware of my emotions?” - a reasonable question, the answer to which is quite simple to find. If, because of the anger you feel towards a certain person, you could not restrain yourself and spoke with this person in a raised voice, but at the same time thoughts were spinning in your head that you were doing bad again, getting angry over trifles and spoiling yourself nerves, then you can congratulate yourself! You have taken one of the significant steps towards realizing your own emotions! Don't stop there and keep working on yourself!
Why is it so important to be aware of your emotions? The point is that awareness allows you to take responsibility for the emotions and feelings you experience, rather than blaming the other person. Thanks to awareness, emotions can be depersonalized, and emotions that are depersonalized and devoid of individual nuance are much simpler and easier to learn to control.
Controlling behavior in stressful situations
The following sequence of actions will help you restrain yourself from committing rash acts in a stressful situation:
- Do not break down or act spontaneously. By an effort of will, restrain the impulse, stop, say to yourself: “Stop! I own the emotion, not it owns me.”
- Take a deep breath and mentally count to ten. Ten seconds is the time that is enough to restrain yourself and not say or do something unnecessary.
- Look at situations from the other side. Ask the question: “Is this so important?”, “Will this be significant in an hour, a day, a year?” Think about the possible consequences.
Keep your balance
Emotions are not only possible, but also necessary to regulate. Like the temperature on a thermostat, we can change the temperature of our emotions. Don't forget that you are the master, not the slave, of your inner impulses.
To feel good, calm and harmonious, your emotions should be neither too “hot” nor too “cold”. Look for the golden mean! Only balanced emotions can make you a happy and free person.
Both an excess of positive emotions and excessively depressive or aggressive behavior are not only bad for your health, but also not always appropriate! The pronounced emotions that we all have to experience from time to time disrupt our spiritual harmony and have a very destructive effect on us. This applies to both negative and positive emotions.
To avoid emotional turmoil and overload your nervous system, try to maintain balance. As soon as you feel that some emotion is overwhelming you and will soon cover you completely, focus your attention on something else: do household chores, go to the gym, cook a new dish, or just start counting mentally or out loud from one to until the emotion lets you go.
The essence of experiments
It all started in the 1960s.
I and my students at Stanford University conducted experiments with preschool children in which the kids were faced with a difficult dilemma. We asked them to choose between one reward (e.g., a marshmallow), which they could receive immediately, or a larger reward (two marshmallows), for which they would have to wait up to 20 minutes. Unexpectedly, it turned out that the actions of preschoolers when they tried to force themselves to wait for a delayed double reward could predict a lot in their future lives. The longer they could wait at age four or five, the higher their scores on academic assessment tests and the more successful they were in social and cognitive behavior in adolescence. Those young people aged 27–32 years who demonstrated the greatest endurance during marshmallow tests as preschoolers had an optimal BMI and more evident self-esteem, were more effective in achieving their goals and were more successful in coping with disappointments and stress. In middle age, those who were able to wait persistently in childhood (“long delay”) and those who could not do this (“short delay”) had completely different brain scans in the areas that are responsible for addiction. and obesity.
Experiments at Stanford Kindergarten showed how mentally imagining tempting rewards can alter, sometimes polarize, the impact on behavior. A child who cannot wait a minute can tolerate a 20-minute wait if he thinks differently about rewards.
Over time, the feeling of mastery over oneself and the acquisition of new skills—for example, playing the violin, building Lego models, or creating new computer applications—will become the rewards that children who engage in these activities will find satisfaction in. Their sense of effectiveness and efficiency in their efforts is rooted in their experience of success and leads to realistic and at the same time optimistic expectations and aspirations. Moreover, each success will increase the chances of achieving the next one.
Get plenty of rest
A person who does not fully rest becomes irritable, slow, apathetic and angry. Lack of rest makes a person too suspicious and emotional.
A fully rested person, unlike a constantly tired workaholic, has much more internal resources to think about and solve this or that life problem. The more tired we are and the less rest we get, the more the quality of our thinking, through which we process the information received, decreases. If you haven’t had a normal rest for a long time and are experiencing chronic fatigue, then you will simply react emotionally to information received from outside, but you will not be able to draw any conclusions and find the best solution to the problem.
Many people think that rest is some kind of abstract and unnecessary phenomenon, so they often neglect it. But in vain, because it has been scientifically proven that due to fatigue, people react too emotionally to this or that problem, make a lot of serious mistakes and make wrong decisions. People who fully rest and get good sleep control their emotions much better. It is much easier for the latter to become balanced individuals and gain control over their inner impulses.
Don't make excuses for yourself
Emotionally unstable people who cannot control their inner impulses begin to justify their actions. They claim that they behave so emotionally because they have such a character, it is characteristic of their essence, the weather outside does not meet their requirements, the tram did not arrive on time, not one, but several black cats crossed the road, etc.
All these external aspects affect a person in a certain way, but they do not affect him so much as to become an excuse for the fact that he does not know how to control himself and his emotions.
As soon as some emotion begins to overwhelm you, do not look for excuses in the outside world, but look at yourself from the outside and think about what factor you are reacting to so violently and why this is happening. Once you get to the bottom of the source of negative emotions and put everything into perspective, you can begin to solve the problem that has arisen, and not think that the stars, magnetic storms or careless drivers are to blame.
Take a little break
If you feel like a teapot that is about to boil, then you should take a short break to cool down, because this condition is very dangerous for both physical and mental health.
Do not react immediately to a situation that causes you negative emotions. Think about how this situation can be resolved. Come up with several options, and then choose the one that is most optimal for you.
To learn to control your emotions, you should remember that you first need to cool down and calm down, and only then can you begin to solve the problem. Analyze the situation objectively, look at it not as a direct participant, but as an outside observer on whom this situation has no influence and for whom it does not evoke any feelings.
If you make a hasty decision under the influence of emotions, you will later experience a bitter and unpleasant feeling of regret. By taking a short break, you can focus your attention on those details that go unnoticed during an emotional outburst.
What affects self-discipline and emotional state?
When developing self-discipline, one should not forget about self-regulation, with which it is closely related. The ability to control one’s actions is determined both by the psychological characteristics of a person that arise during his interaction with society, and by the physical characteristics inherent in genetics. Does this mean that self-control depends not only on the willpower of the individual?
From a physiological point of view, self-discipline is associated with the functioning of the frontal lobe of the brain. With its poor development, a person may be prone to aggression and have problems with socialization. If this part of the brain is damaged, the ability to self-control is reduced or lost.
Psychology has proven that self-control is the result of the interaction of the body’s reflex system with the impulse system. The impulse system gives a person signals about immediate action in relation to objects of interest. Reflexivity protects the individual from rash actions and allows you to think about their consequences.
For example, if a girl decides to go on a diet, but, unable to bear it, eats her favorite dessert, the impulse system is responsible for the loss of self-control. When a woman manages to cope with thoughts of a tasty dish, and she realizes that this will lead to sad consequences in the form of excess weight, reflexes come into play. Improving the ability to self-control means not allowing the impulse system to prevail over the reflex system.
The importance of developing self-control is most clearly demonstrated by the “marshmallow dough” experiment, authored by psychologist Walter Mischel. The scientist managed to prove that a person’s success is related to his willpower. Walter invited a group of children to try a piece of marshmallow. Those guys who were able to resist the sweetness for 15 minutes received a second slice. Children who ate marshmallows were left without the additive.
Walter Mischel continued to observe the subjects for 40 years. Teenagers who were able to show self-discipline were more successful in adulthood, were less nervous, and had almost no dangerous addictions.
Psychologist Walter Mischel
It is already clear that the ability to self-control affects a person’s quality of life. But is it really possible to significantly improve this skill on your own, or can you only achieve minor results?
Universal tips on how to become kinder and calmer towards people
Start keeping a diary
This exercise may seem strange to some. What does a diary have to do with emotions? Very direct! Journaling will help you learn to control your emotions and control your anger. Buy a beautiful notebook or notebook, and write “Diary of my emotions” on the cover. As soon as some negative or positive emotion begins to overwhelm you, immediately open your diary and write down in it everything you feel at the moment.
If you are experiencing a negative emotion, then first share with your diary everything that is boiling inside, and then switch to the positive: realize why you had this or that emotion, how you reacted to this or that remark, why you reacted that way and etc. As soon as you get rid of the emotion and its pressure, then remember and write down in your diary all the good things that happened to you during the day, and those events that caused you joy, happiness, laughter, etc.
Components of self-control
Effective self-control includes 3 components: honesty, the ability not to pass off an illusion as reality, and the use of facts. It is only possible to control this, and control requires systematicity, and not using it from time to time. It is important to constantly notice and celebrate your own indicators.
In addition, external control is required. At first it’s hard to learn to control yourself inside. For this reason, you also need to control yourself outside. This is a great safety net. Tell someone you need to finish by a specific date. Then you will have an external controller of your actions.
Don't deify your emotions
All the emotions you experience are a normal reaction of the nervous system to one or another external stimulus. All chemical processes are a completely normal and familiar phenomenon that occurs in your body, and not some divine manifestations of an intangible nature.
Emotions can be compared to shortcuts on our desktop, which, like interface elements, are necessary for us to interact with the system more easily and productively. With just a few clicks, you are taken to the desired location in your computer system. Both emotions and computer shortcuts, showing us the shortest path, lead us to our destination.
If emotions did not exist, instantaneous decision-making would become confusing, complex, and incomprehensible. Without emotions, all decisions will look exactly the same to us, because any possible development of events will be absolutely indifferent and unnecessary to us.
If people did not experience any emotions, then they would not be able to work productively, enjoy life, set and achieve goals, complete assigned tasks, etc. If you deprive a person of all feelings and emotions, then his life will turn into hell, where every previous day will be no different from every subsequent day.
If you deify emotions, treat them as divine revelation and mindlessly follow their call, you will never be able to make your life simpler and easier.
Why strong people find themselves at the center of scandals
President Clinton had the self-control and ability to delay gratification necessary to win a special scholarship, graduate from Yale Law School, and become President of the United States, but had little desire—and perhaps was unable or unwilling—to use self-control to overcome specific temptations in the form of mild drugs and pretty interns. The ability to delay gratification and exercise self-control is an ability, that is, a set of cognitive skills. Like any ability, it may or may not be used depending mainly on motivation.
Willpower has been erroneously characterized as something different from "skill" because it is not always used consistently over a period of time. But like all skills, self-control is only used when we have the motivation to do so. The skill is stable, but if the motives change, then the behavior changes. Many of the celebrities and public figures in the news headlines were probably reluctant to resist temptation. They often seemed to be seeking temptation and pleasure. Because of the optimistic illusions and inflated self-esteem inherent in most people, but perhaps even more pronounced in them, they felt invulnerable. They didn't expect to be caught red-handed, although someone had already been caught in the past. They believed that if they were exposed, they would be able to get out of it - which is quite reasonable for some of them, especially given their past experience.
Based on your partner's conscientious work at the office, can you predict how well he will do housework? Can I predict how my colleague—who is referred to as a “high risk” in department meetings—will behave at home with children? To my surprise, no rigorous research has been able to confirm the basic assumption: too often, people who were strong in one type of situation were weak in another type of situation. A child who behaves aggressively at home may be calmer at school; a woman who openly demonstrates intense hostility towards the person who rejected her can be very tolerant of criticism of her project.
Meditate
Meditation will not only clear your head of negative thoughts, restore mental balance, develop willpower and improve your quality of life, but also teach you to control your emotions. Any emotion is your reaction to one or another event happening in your life. All emotions begin with your thoughts. First you thought, and only then you felt.
Thanks to meditation, you will achieve a state of spiritual harmony, peace and a sober mind. Several meditation sessions a week will teach you to fight passions, avoid vices and take control of your feelings and emotions. With the help of meditation, you will get rid of the emotional veil and be able to look at yourself and your life objectively.
We recommend: Meditation before bed. 5 effective techniques
Do you need help from a psychologist?
The best way to develop self-control and deal with anger, as in any matter, is to help a specialist. In our case, this is a qualified psychologist. He will be able to become your mentor, help analyze your states and reactions, and show you what you missed. Working on developing self-control with a psychologist is easier, but not necessary. If you feel the strength and confidence to fight on your own, you will definitely succeed. The main thing is regularity and diligence.
Thus, a burning ass is not the end of the world, but just something that can be put out. Monitor your emotional and physical state to develop self-control, please yourself and enjoy life, and entrust us with your preparation for exams.
Say no to emotional overload
The strong emotions that you have to experience if you don’t know how to control yourself cause emotional overload, which negatively affects your body and worsens your health!
If you are so overwhelmed by a feeling that your breathing and heartbeat become faster, your knees begin to tremble, your body sweats excessively, and you experience nausea and dizziness, then this indicates that you have become a victim of emotional overload.
Don't give up and don't get discouraged! Don't go with the flow and don't become a slave to your own emotions! First divide all the information received into several parts, and then begin to analyze them. If you can’t do this mentally, then don’t be too lazy to pick up a pen and write everything down in a notebook.
Once you begin to analyze and consider the information received from all sides, you will be able to come to your senses and take control of your emotions. You will be able to evaluate the results obtained soberly and objectively, and the decision you make in a normal emotional state will be truly rational and effective.
Start living a healthy lifestyle
Our lifestyle affects our emotions in the most direct way. If you want to learn to control your emotions, then be sure to reconsider your lifestyle. Avoid fatty and heavy foods, alcoholic beverages, smoking and other bad habits. Start exercising, eating right and going to bed on time. Spend more time on your spiritual growth and personal development.
Find a hobby that will become your outlet. If at school you attended a young naturalist club and loved picking mushrooms, then why not now go into the forest and enjoy communion with nature? A hobby will help you forget about problems and worries, give you the opportunity to escape from routine and everyday hustle and bustle, and will help develop willpower and increase vitality.
Set high goals
It's so easy to sit on YouTube and watch funny videos... You find time for that! In any case, you must prioritize and determine the most important activities for yourself.
When you are full of doubts and your level of self-control is approaching zero, understanding what really matters to you can save the situation. Of course, even knowing about an important project, you may begin to procrastinate, but deep inside you know that what you are doing is much more important than the moment of comfort that procrastination will provide you with.
Determine your most important goals in different areas of your life: health, well-being, relationships.
If you love chocolate and set yourself a goal to lose 5 kilograms of excess weight, then you understand that the short rush of dopamine from eating your favorite sweet is not more important than your goal.
Of course, this doesn't mean that you will be protected from all your bad habits just by setting goals for yourself. Remember: there will be no quick changes, you will have a long process of working on yourself. But every time you remind yourself of your end goal, it becomes a little easier to pursue it.
Since we're talking about food, here's a simple rule that's very easy to follow. However, it is just as easy to ignore.
Develop and train willpower
Thanks to willpower, you can easily and simply learn to control your emotions. Willpower is your internal resource, with the help of which you will manage not only your emotions and body, but also change your life for the better.
Emotions, like drugs, tempt us, cause addiction and turn us into slaves. Willpower helps you overcome this temptation.
You can develop willpower through asceticism, meditation, sports, planning your day, maintaining personal hygiene, maintaining order around yourself, fighting gastronomic weaknesses, getting rid of bad habits, etc.
Manifestations of self-control in life
In life, there are such manifestations of self-control:
playing sports. With the help of sports activities, a person follows a certain regime, develops willpower by doing physical exercises. This increases self-esteem, self-confidence, and therefore forces us to control ourselves; material goods. A person who knows how to control himself in expenses, in accordance with his financial situation, is distinguished by the ability of self-control; everyday problems. A person who knows how to extinguish a quarrel is the owner of self-control; people who know how to restrain their emotions and are always in search of a compromise have the ability of self-control.
Learn to breathe correctly
Emotional overload directly affects the heart and muscles. If you are experiencing a strong emotional shock, then after a while you will feel tired, overwhelmed and exhausted. To learn to control your emotions and avoid becoming a victim of another emotional overload, you should start practicing deep and slow breathing.
A special breathing technique will not only help you relax and take control of your emotions, but will also saturate your brain with oxygen. As soon as you feel that your emotions are getting the better of you and you can’t think about anything else, then find a secluded place where no one will disturb you, close your eyes and start breathing slowly through your nose.
✔ Each breath should last at least 5-7 seconds. After inhaling, hold your breath for a few seconds and then exhale slowly. Each exhalation, like inhalation, should last at least 5-7 seconds. Do 10-12 repetitions or breathe slowly until you calm down and begin to think clearly.
What is self-control and why is it needed?
Life is full of surprises, and not always good ones. You have to cope with constantly emerging tasks and difficulties as quickly as possible. There is simply no time for hysterics and swearing!
self-control comes to the rescue - the ability to restrain oneself from unwanted and rash actions, calm down and make an informed decision. Simply put, when a math student once again tries to put pressure on a sore spot, developing self-control will help not only not to yell in her face, but also to let hurtful words fall on deaf ears, not allowing them to influence your choice of exams and specialty.
Take actions that are opposite to the emotion that arises
To learn to control emotions, you need to do the opposite of what the emotion provokes you to do. If you feel angry towards some person, then do not give in to the emotion and do not shout at this person, but smile at him and wish him a good day.
If your pride suffers from the fact that someone turned out to be faster, stronger, taller, more successful, happier or simply better than you, then do not envy this person, but sincerely praise him and rejoice at his success.
If you have become a victim of apathy, despondency or laziness, then get off the couch, leave the apartment and start doing something useful.
If some emotion has overwhelmed you and you rush to the phone to call your friend, relative or colleague and tell about all this in great detail, then take up meditation and do everything possible to get rid of the emotion without outside help.
If you are unable to take an action opposite to the emotion that has arisen, then try to simply ignore this emotion. Act as if you are not experiencing this emotion right now.
Controlling emotions: exercises
The exercises presented below can be performed at any time when you need to control your emotions, i.e. in real time. Traditionally, they are suitable for negative emotions, but for variety and to hone the skill, you can practice them while experiencing positive emotions. We will offer four exercises in total:
- The first exercise is to replace any negative emotions with positive ones, for example, anger and malice with joy and laughter. For example, you are arguing with a person, and the atmosphere is becoming increasingly tense. At the moment of apogee, when emotions are rushing out, tell the person something that he does not expect to hear at all. For example, you can say to your loved one: “You are so dear to me” or “I love you.” If this is a friend, say: “You are the best friend in the world!” Answer your boss: “You are a very cool leader.” But be careful that it doesn’t look like a mockery. Having done everything correctly, you will instantly extinguish emotions – both yours and your interlocutor’s.
- The second exercise is a variation of the first, but it is designed more to change your own state. At the moment when you realize that you are unable to contain negative emotions and a corresponding reaction is about to follow, transform it into the exact opposite. If something annoying and very unpleasant has happened, and you want to “erupt in thunder,” make an effort and smile, laugh, jump for joy. Think about what good can come out of the situation and start enjoying it like a child. Do the same with other negative emotions.
- The third exercise is journaling. It may seem unusual, but it is very helpful in controlling emotions and controlling anger. Buy a notebook and make it an “emotion diary.” Whenever you feel yourself starting to get angry, sad, guilty, or resentful, sit down in a chair or at a table and start writing. But write not what worries you, but on the contrary - all the good things that happened during the day, what is in your life, what you are happy about. Switch from negative to positive. You will begin to think in a different direction, and your mood will begin to change. Save your notes, and in moments of the next negative experience, make new ones and re-read old ones. As a result, your “emotion diary” will be filled with a lot of pleasant impressions and memories that will help you control your emotions better and better.
- The fourth exercise allows you to neutralize negative emotions or at least minimize their manifestation and impact on the psyche. It is similar to the previous one, but if then you wrote down all the good events in your diary, now you are throwing out on paper everything that worries you. You don’t need a diary for this - you just take paper and pen and write everything that comes to your mind. After you have expressed all your thoughts, take this piece of paper and burn it, imagining that all negative emotions turn into ashes. You can also use one more variation: divide the sheet into two parts, where the first will contain bad emotions, and the second will contain the opposite good ones. Then cut the sheet, burn the “bad” half, and keep the “good” half for yourself and re-read it several times, concentrating on the positive. This exercise will help you endure bad events more easily, restrain your emotions, and endure anger.
We hope that our article, although it did not open your eyes to the importance and features of managing emotions, has expanded your knowledge and given food for thought. The only other thing we can advise is to try with all your being to accept the idea that you are capable of becoming the master of your feelings and emotions, stop being their slave and follow their lead. We wish you to always believe in yourself and, looking in the mirror, see in the reflection a successful, joyful and satisfied person with life. And finally, some more advice from psychologists. Good luck!
We also recommend reading:
- Storytelling
- Emotional Labor
- Emotional management: what is it and how to learn it
- How to express your emotions without becoming a manipulator
- Emotional regulation
- Mastery of Self-Control
- Emotions and health: how they are interconnected
- Anger management: a selection of useful materials
- 5 Signs You're a Slave to Your Emotions
- How to develop self-control and self-discipline
- Mindfulness and its benefits
Key words:1Psychoregulation
Stop hanging out with toxic people
Why do you need to limit or completely stop communicating with toxic people? The fact is that people have the ability to transfer their emotions to other people. And if you communicate with positive and pleasant interlocutors, then your mood improves noticeably, and you yourself begin to feel much better.
Constant communication with toxic and negative people can turn the most cheerful optimist into a grumbler dissatisfied with anyone and nothing who looks at the world through the prism of the darkest pessimism. If you want to learn to control your emotions and be in harmony with yourself and the outside world, then you should definitely refuse to communicate with such people. If you can’t completely cut off the connection, then do everything possible to reduce communication with the toxic person to a minimum.
What to do if another person is angry?
No matter how much we would like all the reasons for anger to lie within ourselves, sometimes those around us literally provoke and deliberately put pressure on sore spots. In this case, it is very difficult to restrain yourself. But there are two things that will help in developing self-control:
- Letter writing - write everything you think about this person, insult him if it helps. The main thing is not to hold back. Express everything that has accumulated in your soul. This will help systematize your own emotions to develop self-control and throw out anger. And then destroy the letter. Cruelty is encouraged.
- Awareness of motives - the development of self-control is built on reasons. And sometimes they lie not in ourselves, but in other people. Try to understand what makes this person behave this way. Maybe it’s unfulfilled ambitions, envy, your own fears? This will help you not perceive the person as a threat and control yourself when communicating with him.
Think about the solution, not the problem
If some difficult situation has arisen in your life, it will definitely cause a certain negative reaction in you. The more you think about the problem, the more you chew “mental gum” and think about this or that aspect of the current situation, the more negative emotions will take over you. Thoughts about a problem most often cause anger, anger, disappointment, sadness, sadness, etc. It is quite normal to experience such emotions in this case, but very ineffective.
You shouldn’t dwell on the problem, because the current situation can no longer be changed. There's no time machine that can take you back in time, so it's worth thinking about what you'll do in the future. Don't think about the problem, think about how to solve it.
Start making a list of all possible solutions to the problem! While you are thinking about your next course of action, emotions will no longer be a priority for you. You will be able to soberly assess the current situation and find the strength to move on.
See the world through the eyes of a realist
Learn to accept reality as it really is. A variety of people live in our world: there are kind and decent individuals, there are evil and envious people, there are noble gentlemen, there are inveterate gossips, etc. We have to communicate and interact with these and many other types of personalities every day.
Some people cheer us up and make our day better, while others try to ruin our nerves and do everything possible to get the desired resource from us in the form of anger, hatred, anger, sadness, sadness, irritation, etc.
You should not get hung up on why this or that person said this or that word to you, performed this or that action, was rude to you, was rude, caused you aggression, etc. Each person has his own story, his own problems, experiences, his own character and his own way of thinking.
Your task is not to understand the inner world of a complete stranger to you, but to learn to control your emotions. We cannot influence other people, but we can change our attitude towards this or that life situation.
Our channel: Yandex Zen
