Hello, dear readers!
Can you call yourself a truly happy person? Here, honestly, hand on heart, say: “yes, I have everything for complete happiness!” I can, for example, say that I’m happy, but I can’t say that I completely, in some ways, would like more =)
Each of us strives for happiness and harmony in the soul, this is natural, this is life. There is even an International Day of Happiness. But what makes a person happy? This article contains 11 things that answer this question.
Secrets of a happy life
What are their happy lives? Actually different. And each person has his own path to happiness. There are bad roads with suffering and pain, as well as good roads with satisfaction and joy. And each direction involves a lot of options for the development of events. But there is happiness. It is like a lock to which not everyone finds the key. It is important to follow the dictates of your soul.
Many people have the secrets of happy lives. They actually feel happy. Here are the main steps on how to become happy people:
- You can't compare yourself to other people. You can't find a stupider activity. However, most people do this in their lives. Each of us has our own circumstances and conditions of existence, as well as our own character traits, potential, state of health, way of thinking, etc. So forget about comparison. We need to live and enjoy what we have.
- It is important to have a dream, a goal in life. A person is happy when he realizes his own mission. But you need to set achievable goals. Every day, approaching a dream, a person feels true bliss, his heart is filled with happiness and joy.
- The past is not worth pitying. People tend to analyze the mistakes of the past and think about probable scenarios of what happened. In some cases this is useful, but it is still a waste of time and effort. You need to realize, correct mistakes if possible, accept them as a lesson and move on.
- Don't hold grudges. It is pointless and even dangerous to your health to be angry with other people. The significant ones need to be forgiven, and the rest should simply be forgotten and not waste your energy on them.
- Always be responsible for your choices. We often don’t even notice that we are constantly faced with the need to choose something. And the blame for failure lies with each of us. So we chose the wrong path.
- You need to enjoy life. The world around us is truly beautiful. You just need to take a closer look at it. A blooming garden, splendid architecture, a sunny day, a nightingale singing, etc. It's all around us. It will help dispel bad thoughts and relax after hard work. You just have to pay attention to it.
- We must value time. It is necessary to manage your life correctly and not waste time. After all, there isn't much of it. If a person realizes that he is not living in vain, he feels happy.
Thus, happiness is an individual state, a subjective perception of the environment.
They are grateful for what they have
UC Davis professor Robert Emmons has been studying gratitude for more than a decade. He found that people who feel grateful—for a sunset, for a friend, or simply for being alive—are 25% happier than people who don't.
For example, you don’t like your job, but you have enough money to pay the bills and stay afloat. This does not mean that you should not strive to find a more suitable job. But for now, it’s worth showing gratitude that you have a way to earn money, unlike those whose search for vacancies has not yet been successful.
You can be grateful every day. For example, for being healthy. Or for sleeping in on a day off because your household was trying not to wake you up. Find small reasons to be grateful - and it will make you happier.
What is happiness like?
What is happiness like? It has many facets. It can be for women, children, large, family, personal, etc. U
There are many defining epithets for this concept. Each of us has the opportunity to look for new reasons to be happy every day. There are so many beautiful things in the world, material and spiritual. You can find pleasure in every little thing. The main thing is to want it.
Let's talk about what makes people happy:
● Feeling of love, care and support from family and friends. Loneliness will definitely not “provide” happiness to anyone. And in difficult moments you cannot do without support.
● Life should be enjoyed. A useful skill is to have an optimistic view of what is happening around you. If you know how to see the positive in any situation, then you are more likely than others to be on the path to happiness.
● Free choice. Forced obedience to the rules that are imposed by society, religions, etc., interferes with happiness. However, this is not the only reason that stands in the way of this condition and an obstacle to the right choice. Don't get hung up on little things, learn to choose and recognize your own needs.
● Live here and now and make the most of life. You need to live, not anticipate. Making plans, projecting a bright future, thinking about buying a new home, getting rich is not bad. But only if you do not postpone their implementation, but make efforts to implement such plans. And this should in no way interfere with living in the present day.
● You can't be jealous. Sincere joy in someone else's success and happiness helps you find it yourself. And envy only prevents this.
● Cherished dream. It moves a person like a guide. It is important to have an important achievable goal. At the very first step, “wings grow” and you want to move on, towards your dream.
● Favorite job, activity. A job that brings pleasure is one of the key conditions for success and well-being. Having a hobby that brings not only money, but also moral satisfaction is the best option in terms of work.
They accept life's troubles
Happy people remember that life is not only a series of positive emotions, there are also difficult times. They do not dramatize when they encounter difficulties and problems, but try to solve them.
Kathleen Dahlen, a psychotherapist in San Francisco, says accepting negative feelings is an important habit that allows you to learn from difficult situations and emotions and cope with them more easily.
Therefore, in difficult situations you should not give up and feel sorry for yourself - you need to develop an action plan to overcome them. After all, when we cope with something difficult, we feel like winners. And this is an important component of happiness.
They don't compare themselves to others
A happy person does not need the approval of others to feel satisfied with himself and his life. The only comparison they allow themselves is with themselves in the past. And, accordingly, they strive to become the best version of themselves, and not compete with someone in order to achieve success.
For example, in six months you managed to lose 10 kilograms. You compare yourself in the past and present and feel uplifted. But if you simply compared yourself with a slender friend, the effect would be the opposite.
Also, don't compare yourself to celebrities. Behind the “chic life” there are often hidden anxieties that we would not like to experience at all.
Prosperity.
This is not about wealth and accumulation at all, but about meeting basic needs. It's hard to be joyful when you don't know where to get money for treatment, food or warm clothes. Lack of money is largely the main cause of quarrels and divorces among married couples. And if the heart understands that with a sweetheart there is heaven in the hut, then the mind trusts the cruel reality more.
To earn enough money, we spend more time at work, which means we get tired more and feel worse. And in such a state, even a salary does not bring fun. It turns out to be a vicious circle. Modern studies have shown that residents of countries with low levels of economic development rarely smile and are susceptible to alcohol addiction and psychological breakdowns. It is important to find a balance between poverty and wealth so that you have time for yourself, your family, and your favorite activities. Only in this harmony will a person feel happiness here and now.
Move closer to work
Many people are used to traveling to work far away. Of course, if your apartment is located in one area, and all your high-paying jobs are in another, you will have to constantly travel. But this will not make you happier. You spend twice a day, five days a week in a car or on public transport, and different traffic situations drive you crazy.
Two economists from Switzerland conducted an experiment related to the impact of travel on a person's happiness and found that neither a bigger house nor a better job compensate for the damage that a long commute to work causes to happiness.
They build strong relationships with people
Meaningful relationships, strong bonds and social connections are one of the biggest predictors of happiness. It plays a huge role in who we are and how we feel. Relationships with other people shape our thinking and well-being, and contribute to satisfaction and happiness.
Happy people invest their time, energy, and attention into building and nurturing meaningful relationships. They have friends of different ages, they try to spend time with their loved ones and strive to build strong and long-lasting romantic relationships.
Fostering these close relationships is quite simple: make it a priority. Spend more time with your friends, and if this is not possible, write them an SMS, call them at least once a week, support them if they need it.
It is also important to choose the right environment. Having happy people around us builds confidence, stimulates creativity and brings great pleasure. And hanging out with negative people has the opposite effect. Here's how to tell if you have a toxic boyfriend or girlfriend.
Love.
Without the feeling of love, a person cannot exist. Nature created him this way. Only everyone has their own source of love. Someone follows the traditional path, finding a faithful life partner, devoting themselves to children and family. Someone expresses all their love by caring for a pet. For some, it is enough to receive the love of friends. And religious people claim that Faith gives them optimism and love.
One way or another, without this feeling it is impossible to feel complete joy. By the way, most of the psychological traumas that we discover as adults are based precisely on the lack of love and care in childhood. They just don’t let you feel happiness here and now.
They devote time to physical activity
Exercise is an important source of hormonal and neurotransmitter balance. Activity helps the body produce oxytocin, serotonin and endorphins - the chemical foundations of happiness.
Therefore, even 15 minutes of daily exercise can make us more productive and energetic. And it also adds self-confidence.
If you're having trouble finding motivation for fitness, here are a few life hacks you can try:
- Find a company. Arrange to go to the fitness center with a friend or do exercises at home by calling on Skype. You will receive additional support, as well as motivation not to let your partner down and not give up training.
- Download a fitness tracker to your phone that will remind you of your workout and show your results. It’s easier to do something if you see that you’re doing it for a reason.
- Find a workout that you enjoy. You don't have to pick up dumbbells to increase physical activity, especially if you don't like them. You can dance, do yoga, stretch, go for a run in the nearest park if you enjoy it.
Sleep more, and negative emotions will not reach you
The book NatureShock by Poe Bronson and Ashley Merriman explains how sleep affects positivity. Negative stimuli, that is, unpleasant information, are processed by the amygdala of the brain, and positive and neutral data enters the hippocampus and is processed there. Sleep deprivation damages the hippocampus more than the amygdala, and as a result, lack of sleep affects memories: only gloomy pictures appear, and all the good things are forgotten faster .
An experiment was conducted on this topic: students were deprived of sleep and asked to memorize a list of words. 81% of the words that were remembered by sleepy students were negatively connoted.
Another study tested how employees' morning mood affected their overall day. How they perceived clients and responded to their mood in the morning depended on the rest of the day, as well as their productivity and quality of work.
