How to find yourself and your place in life

The question of how to find yourself, how to realize your purpose in life, always remains relevant. Although there is a certain contradiction here - how can you look for something that is not lost?

After all, everything is in place - arms, legs, heads - but not everyone is sure of what will happen tomorrow. People are worried about the lack of a good job, livelihood, friends, not everyone has met their soulmate. These emotions prevent a person from receiving satisfaction from life, but they clearly form the feeling of “I can’t find myself.” This means that the years have been lived in vain.

Why can't we find ourselves

Psychologists are sure that the culprit is a lack of knowledge! A person is trying to find himself, but does not know how to do it. After some time, this desire disappears, but dissatisfaction remains. Usually, the solution to the problem of how to find one’s place in life begins in adolescence.

With the passing of youth, its relevance decreases. People simply live without a goal, without thinking about why they came into this world.

What does it mean to find yourself? Every person, without exception, must answer this question, and therefore find himself. The main thing is to believe in your capabilities and desire it. Only that person will be truly happy who has found his way and correctly understood his purpose.

How will life change when your purpose is found?

Every person has their own superpower. This is what works best. Superpower is an inner need of a person.

From the outside, many people may perceive your superpower as hard work, but you will be happy about it.

When you find your superpower, your purpose, you will be happy.

You will be able to do your work as efficiently and efficiently as possible and receive positive feedback from the world.

You can become a genius if you discover your superpower.

Where to start your search

In order to understand what attracts you most. The main thing is to do it honestly, without embarrassment:

Take a piece of paper and list everything you like and enjoy in life. Call this opus: “Looking for myself.” Reflect the points in the order in which you thought of them. Take this seriously. There should be at least 30 points.
Cross out everything that is done only out of mood, that you would not want to do professionally for the rest of your life. Analyze all points carefully.
On the other side of the paper, list your abilities, skills, and what you are most proud of, what makes you different from other people.
Compare both lists and make a third one, in which you indicate in which types of activities your skills and desires coincide. Try to come up with several options.
Separately indicate the reasons why the implementation of these points is difficult or impossible. Be honest with yourself. If the issue is your inaction or lack of funds, then write it down.
Conduct a detailed analysis of opportunities to improve the situation. You will be surprised at how few obstacles stand in the way of your goal. By eliminating one reason, you will gradually get rid of others. For example, by improving your qualifications, you will get a good job, which will give you the opportunity to improve your financial situation and go on a trip or purchase a long-desired item. It turns out that the topic “Looking for myself” has found a logical solution - you need to pull the thread so that the ball unwinds.
If a lack of skills prevents you from realizing your desire, don’t be discouraged. This can be fixed, you can buy them.
Search - try and make mistakes. To answer the question “what does it mean to find yourself” means to find, among all the others, exactly that business to which you will be happy to devote your life.
Start small and positive events will follow one after another. Your life will change.

After some time, when all the items on this list have been completed, it will become clear what exactly your purpose is.

When working on the topic “Looking for myself,” do not try to add anything unnecessary to the list; it should reflect only what you like. The connection with the actual state of affairs and existing work may not be visible.

Experts have proven that each of us can have many such hobbies. This means that everyone has a chance to find themselves, become happier and more successful than many celebrities.

Analysis of the situation

The first step in order to make a meaningful choice and find yourself is to know yourself. It is difficult to describe and ignore the state when a person does not know who he really is. But no matter how difficult this search may be, it is worth it. Knowing your own essence is an edifying experience that can help you become a self-sufficient person. A few questions to start the process of getting to know yourself:

What surrounds a person now?
Does he have self-pity and demands for pity from others?
Does he have dreams?
And are there fears that prevent you from moving forward? We are talking specifically about those fears that a person sincerely wants to get rid of, and not those that provide a comfortable life.
Is he an optimist or a pessimist?
Personal qualities that contribute to moving forward?
Properties that interfere with achieving goals and success?
What kind of people are in a person’s close circle and are there those among them who hinder personal growth?
Reasons for not realizing your dreams? Were they real?
How did a person come to the current state?

It is very important to talk to yourself openly and honestly. It is recommended to write down the answers in a gadget or on a piece of paper.

Difficulties along the way

Moving towards a goal, everyone encounters problems and is not immune from mistakes. There is nothing wrong with this and there is no reason to consider yourself a failure either.

To be honest, the one who avoids meeting them is more likely to be called a loser. If a person is thinking, and the thought “I have lost myself” haunts him and requires a solution, then he is on the path to success.

For a true sage, it is not the goal itself that is of particular value, but the road that leads to it, no matter how difficult it may be.

When deciding how to find yourself in life, you need to understand all this and not be afraid, because fear blocks movement and desires. Fear is a response to danger, but it can be deceptive. Remove this factor, and then everything will work out.

Preface

Probably, like many, I did not immediately find a use for myself in this world.
And in my case, it took a lot of time to find myself, and the people around me made a great contribution to this, for which I am eternally grateful to them. I believe I now have the feeling that I have found what I was looking for. Along with this, there are people in my social circle for whom this issue is still relevant. And, since I used to be fond of writing articles, I decided that my story and conclusions might be useful to someone.

Right away, of course, I want to make a reservation that everything described below is not fully history, but it is not a universal guide either. These are generalizations from the path that I took from a military university to psychology, marketing, and eventually came to the IT field.

About the influence of determinants

A person can intuitively understand his recognition - this information about this is embedded in our subconscious, but generally accepted stereotypes and the opinions of others often prevent an individual from realizing himself.

It turns out that a person, talking about how to find himself in life, does not feel responsible for it. That is why he allows the determination of his path to be influenced by the opinions of others and generally accepted conventions.

If a person is looking for himself and at the same time strives to be better than others, then competition is the determining factor for him. Even if he gets a good result, he will be dissatisfied, because there will always be that person who has achieved more in life.

The result is a feeling of emptiness and meaninglessness of existence.

How to exclude the influence of extraneous settings:

Those who seek themselves must give up the pursuit of leadership. Stop striving to surpass others and the beauty of your essence will emerge. She will find a way out through love, the desire for development and creativity. Then your opinion will not depend on other people's assessments. Such a person is busy doing what he loves and receives satisfaction from it. His goal is to create, and not to strive for results.

Other effective tips

Continuing the list of life hacks for those who are looking for themselves, it is worth paying attention to attitudes and priorities. They need to not only be placed, but also changed if they slow down growth. Other recommendations:

It is best to communicate with smart, positive and successful women and men of different ages. Losers and depressed people pull back. As a rule, people feel great around happy individuals who themselves are positive and positive in others. Accordingly, from conversations with those who always complain, the mood worsens and the energy disappears. But it is important to remember that depression is a serious mental disorder and if someone close to you is really sick, you need to help him and not leave him in trouble. In addition, it is important to radiate optimism yourself so that others are drawn to the person.
Overcoming fears. Successful individuals know that phobias interfere with moving forward, so they fight them by opening their own businesses or preparing presentations.
Organization of the world. Putting things in order opens the way to self-knowledge: cleaning the apartment, resolving a conflict situation with a colleague and completing all important tasks.
Blank sheet. This point is about developing your own system of moral values and observing it. All vices, habits and actions that constantly distract and harm, bind the real “I” must be removed.
Passion. Finding something in life that is worth the effort, tears and sacrifices is perhaps the most significant discovery for a person. If something seems beautiful and inspires faith, you should strive for it, no matter what other people's opinions may be.
Mentor. Of course, the search for oneself must be accompanied by loneliness, because only a person himself can determine his needs. But masters and mentors help you avoid unnecessary obstacles. A person with a developed sense of self-awareness and in whom there is trust is suitable.
You don't need to please everyone. It is known that you cannot please everyone; there will always be someone who will treat you poorly, regardless of the string of merits and similar positive things. It is important to ignore such points of view, even if they belong to dear people. Independence from other people’s opinions is a huge step towards knowing your true self and living a harmonious life.
Privacy. Every day you need to find time to walk and think alone, protecting yourself from noise, endless flow of information, dialogues, pressure and expectations. The best places for such a pastime are public gardens, forests and any places where you can be alone with nature and relax. The main thing is that solitude does not bring discomfort and fear. Anyone who is looking for himself must feel self-sufficient and independent.
Serve others. As Maha said. Serving the community and others is one of the best ways to discover your purpose.
Stepping out of your comfort zone. If you leave your usual environment and observe yourself, you can learn about yourself something that was previously inaccessible.

Psychologists also note that there are no time limits for finding yourself: for some a week is enough, for others the process can take years. Therefore, you should be patient.

We must not forget that the morning is wiser than the evening. There is no need to rush into making decisions, especially if they are global. The main adviser of any seeker should be his inner voice.

How to find yourself and your purpose in life - What prevents you from understanding your true calling and finding talent

Sequencing

The problem for those who do not understand how to find their place in life is often hidden in inconsistency. They tend to take on the next lesson, abandoning the previous one, without bringing it to its logical conclusion. Enthusiasm disappears, and along with it the desire to search. The result is a lack of results and disappointment.

In fact, everything should be different:

How to find yourself? Choose a task, feel the goal with all your soul and move forward.
Get the result, feel the importance of the idea, and you will be surprised at how many positive emotions and energy will fill you.
If you have found your calling, doubts will be dispelled immediately.
If this doesn’t happen, don’t live with the thought “I’ve lost myself” - move on.

How do you know when it's time to start looking for your purpose?

If you have:

There is no understanding of what kind of person you are, what you like and what you don’t like;
There is fear of the future. You worry about what awaits you and what will happen to you;
The priority is to find money matters. You don't pay attention to what the soul wants;
There is confidence that you can’t make money doing what you love, that it cannot be a matter of life, but only entertainment.

Leave stereotypes behind

People tend to treat their choices, their own thoughts and actions as the only right decision. This factor often interferes with them, depriving them of sensitivity. Those who strive to change their life, to find new meaning in it, need to abandon the existing ideas formed earlier.

To get an answer to the question of how to find yourself in life, there is an interesting technique - when communicating with different people, try to mentally try on their image on yourself, feel their values, desires and worldview.

Do not look disdainfully at unusual frames, try to evaluate them objectively. As if to weigh it.

A person’s vocation as one of the elements of understanding oneself.

Since there is a division between would-be and destined, let’s first talk about vocation. In essence, these are the inclinations of a person, which are formed both due to genetic factors and upbringing, as well as our environment, etc. Understanding your own calling makes life easier. A person will be able to master an interesting profession earlier and then hone his skills until old age. The sooner we understand future specialization, the more prospects will open up to us. In search of a calling, it is more correct to say not “I’m looking for myself,” but “I want to understand my abilities.” There are a number of techniques to find your calling:

Try yourself in various activities;
Understand how you can be useful to society;
To live an active lifestyle;
Communicate with representatives of professions of interest;
Pass career guidance tests;
Put aside laziness, fears, self-doubt;
Ask your relatives and friends for opinions;
Try to expand your knowledge about existing professions.

Finding yourself is not always limited to finding a job. Many people are interested in the cause-and-effect relationships of more significant events in their lives.

Take the test: introvert or extrovert?

Thesis four:

Where a person clearly understands which social role is the main one for him, the question “Who am I?” usually does not occur.

Sherlock Holmes, for example, had no problems with his own identity. His social roles were very different. Judging by the title “Esquire,” he was an aristocrat, although not a very noble one. But he is a very restless tenant and neighbor. Holmes, frankly speaking, did not succeed as a musician either. But he turned out to be quite good as a boxer. But all the successes and failures in these and other fields worried him very little, since he had decided on his identity once and for all. We know this literary hero precisely as a specialist in solving crimes. Sherlock Holmes considered himself a detective. And the best in the world. He viewed all other social roles as a hobby or help in the main work of his life.

But his faithful assistant John Watson, apparently, had quite serious problems with his own identity. And to the question “who am I” he would hardly be able to give such a clear answer. Really, who is he? A war veteran who was discharged after being wounded. A doctor trying to open a private practice in the capital. The young husband of the beautiful Mrs. Watson, enjoying the joys of family life. Friend and assistant of the great detective. And finally, the author of fascinating detective stories about Sherlock Holmes. Try to determine which of the listed social roles Watson considered his main one. And you will immediately understand that this is hardly possible. John Watson himself could not clearly answer who he considers himself to be in the first place. And only by considering all the stories about Sherlock Holmes in their entirety, we can conclude: Dr. Watson’s main work was his service to his brilliant friend in his difficult but noble work - solving crimes. It was in this service that Watson's best qualities manifested themselves - loyalty, selflessness, willingness to sacrifice oneself for the sake of one's neighbor. And of course, his literary talent was also able to reveal itself only thanks to the desire to tell people about this amazing person who protects them from criminal evil.

This is where we come to a very important point. It turns out that a person’s identity is determined not simply by any preferences in choosing a leading social role for oneself.