Crisis of 17 years: when you still seem to be children in status, but you already have to make responsible decisions

The crisis of 17 years is one of the periods of abrupt and rapid development of a person, when his whole life becomes completely different from what it was before. It is associated with global changes in the range of interests, communication, and activities. Boys and girls are constantly faced with a choice, and therefore they are tense and stressed.

This crisis is characterized by such signs as stubbornness, youthful maximalism, temporary disorders of the autonomic and central nervous systems. After overcoming the crisis, the teenager turns into a young man (girl): he becomes more thoughtful, focused, logical and adequate.

Definition of the concept

In short, the crisis of 17 years in developmental psychology is another period of rapid development of a person, during which he begins to search for himself, changes relationships with others, acquires new goals in life and develops new behavioral strategies for himself. Despite the name, the age limits of the youth crisis are from 16 to 18 years, depending on the life situation and development of the child.

Complexes

An inferiority complex is a frequent companion of adolescence; it often becomes the main characteristic of the psychological characteristics of seventeen-year-old children. Girls and boys at the age of 17 often form an ideal image and suffer from inconsistency with it.

If for younger teenagers the assessment of others and their opinions are of great importance, then seventeen-year-olds rely more on their point of view. The desire to be like peers competes with one’s own individuality.

In order to avoid disappointment in their own appearance, parents need to take care of attending sports sections and dancing. The acquired flexibility and grace will contribute to increased self-esteem.

Causes of the crisis of adolescence

The main reason for the crisis of adolescence is the need and need for self-determination. Boys and girls constantly have to face a choice: with whom to communicate, what to do, what profession to choose, where to go to study. This situation is stressful for the child, so during this period he is in tension. Most often, high school students and school graduates encounter the following problems:

Unified State Exam

Final exams give schoolchildren a lot of trouble in choosing subjects and preparing for certification. The most unpleasant moment is the uncertainty until the very beginning of the exam. A person prepares using trial versions, but he never knows which one he will come across in the exam room. In addition, it takes 7-14 days to check the work, and all this time the graduate has to worry about his results.

Situation of choice

The older teenager chooses his future path after school; in his opinion, the rest of his life depends on this choice. Therefore, his nervous system becomes overexcited when thinking about where to go to study, what to become, whether to leave his hometown or stay, what form of education to choose, whether to combine study with work or to focus on one thing.

Expectations of the immediate environment

Parents, relatives and friends expect something from almost any child, even almost an adult. For example, that he will study well, be able to successfully pass exams, and enter a prestigious university. Society also makes its own demands, which are not so easy to meet. The graduate is constantly asked about what he will do, whether he is ready for exams, where he is going to enroll, what he wants to do. Most girls and boys in crisis at the age of 17 are still in a state of uncertainty, so such questions cause them some tension and irritation.

Changing your usual life

When entering an educational institution after school or getting a job, a young man is faced with conditions that are completely new to him. You have to take on more responsibility, join a new team, make your own decisions, perhaps learn to live separately from your parents, solve your own financial issues and housing problems. The adaptation period also turns out to be quite stressful.

All these situations aggravate the manifestations of the youth crisis.

Emotional development at 17 years old

Turn 17 is an interesting fork in the road for many teenagers. Some of them smoothly move towards adulthood. They become increasingly responsible and strive to become independent.

Others, however, fear the reality of adulthood ahead. Some of them seem lost and confused about the future. They may even struggle to be responsible in their homework, chores and daily responsibilities and may be afraid of becoming an adult.

For the most part, the 17-year-old's mood is calmer than in his earlier teenage years. This is due to fewer hormonal changes and a greater sense of control. But that doesn't mean teens won't struggle with their emotions when faced with a big problem. Whether they're dealing with a broken heart or college rejection, many 17-year-olds are facing adult-level challenges for the first time.

Likewise, most 17-year-olds are goal-oriented. They begin to imagine the kind of lifestyle they want to create after school. So make sure you give them the opportunity to understand who they are and what they want to do.

Major milestones

  • Show more independence from your parents
  • Have deeper abilities to develop closer relationships
  • Take less risks

Advice for parents

Letting your teenager drive, get a job, and stay home alone at night are just a few steps toward becoming an adult. 1 It is also important to rein them in, especially if they make poor choices.

Signs of an adolescent crisis

For most children of high school age, the crisis of 17 years manifests itself quite clearly, so parents may well notice it on their own, without special diagnostics. It is characterized by the following features:

The emergence of fears

The teenager begins to often express his worries about what will happen to him next. He is worried about the future and everything connected with it. He is afraid of making a mistake, making a mistake in choosing the path, not meeting the expectations of loved ones, and is worried about the emergence of new responsibilities and duties. If some of the fears are realized, for example, an insufficiently high score on the Unified State Exam, then the child may go into deep depression.

Nervous system disorders

These include problems of the autonomic system: dizziness, rapid heartbeat, nervous tics, pressure surges, dyspeptic disorders, chest pain and increased work of the sweat glands. Neurotic reactions also include emotional disorders: unstable mood, irritability, short temper, tearfulness, decreased performance, increased anxiety, increased self-criticism, decreased concentration, lack of confidence in one’s own strengths and capabilities, pessimism.

Youthful maximalism

This is the name of the symptom of the crisis of 17 years, in which a teenager sees the world in black and white: for him, either everything is good or everything is bad, he needs either everything or nothing. It is associated with rigidity of thinking, normal for age, selfishness and lack of life experience. Signs of youthful maximalism include:

  • high categorical judgments;
  • stubbornness;
  • excessive self-confidence;
  • the desire to stand out from other people as much as possible;
  • inflated demands on people around you and on yourself;
  • lack of desire to compromise;
  • excessive emotionality when arguing and proving your point of view.

Peer opinion

Communication with your peers is very important, as it promotes socialization and the development of communicative skills. It is important that it internally enriches the son or daughter; for this purpose, control is necessary. Increasing parental authority will contribute to the ability to resist the negative influence of some peers.

Conflict with classmates can lead to the child demonstrating an aggressive mood only at school. The attitude of teenagers towards each other is sometimes terrifying; this phenomenon often reflects the manifestation of aggression and conflict in the family.

Features of the crisis

According to the cultural-historical theory of L.S. Vygotsky, the peculiarities of the course of the crisis of adolescence are expressed in changes in three components of the personality:

  1. Leading activity. From an intimate-personal one, which was in adolescence, it turns into an educational-professional one. During this period, a person needs to make a decision in life and get a profession, so normally most of his personal resources are directed to learning and learning new things. Communication with peers fades into the background, but does not completely disappear from the young man’s life.
  2. Social situation of development. Here, during a crisis, a huge number of changes also occur: the circle of communication, quality, goals, methods of interaction, new strategies of behavior in conflicts and disputes appear, a person learns to argue his point of view and work successfully in a team to solve common problems. The attitude of older people around them towards boys and girls is also becoming different: they are increasingly looked at not as children, but as adults, addressed as “you”, respected more and allowed to express themselves.
  3. The emergence of age-related neoplasms of early adolescence. The crisis of 17 years ends with new personality qualities, including:
  • professional self-determination;
  • formation of an individual thinking style;
  • regulation of one’s own behavior based on values ​​and meanings;
  • formation of logical intelligence;
  • awareness of one's own value and individuality;
  • personal self-determination.

The contradiction of the crisis is 17 years old, according to the concept of L.S. Vygotsky is a confrontation between two opposing desires: to communicate and to isolate. A person still wants communication, but for self-realization he also has a need for solitude. His main task is to find a balance between these phenomena, without losing touch with society and without relegating the realization of his own capabilities to the background.

Physical development at 17 years old

Most men and women are fully developed by the age of 17. They have reached sexual maturity and reached full height. 1 However, boys can continue to develop muscles.

They may also develop more hair on their face and armpits, and their voices may continue to get quieter. Body image issues often arise at this age as some teens are unhappy with the physical changes they have gone through. 1 Acne may also become common.

Major milestones

  • Reached their full height
  • Completed puberty
  • Boys may still experience muscle development

Advice for parents

Talk to your teen about good health, not appearance. Focus on eating nutritious foods rather than dieting or gaining weight. 1

Risks of adolescence crisis

The crisis of adolescence in psychology is a normal period of human development, but their future life depends on how a boy or girl comes out of it. Sometimes a crisis turns out to be a very risky phenomenon, the reason for which is often the absence of understanding and sensible people nearby who are able to adequately perceive what is happening to the child and help him cope with it.

One of the unpleasant consequences of the crisis of adolescence may be incorrect professional self-determination. The reasons are different: a mistake with the choice, insistence on the part of the parents; enrolling not where you wanted, but where they took you or where you came without real motivation; admission “for the company.” Regardless of the reasons, after 1-3 years of study a person realizes that he did not take the path he wanted. In this case, there are two ways: quit and start all over again, or continue to study in a specialty that does not bring moral satisfaction. In the first case, time and resources are wasted on what turns out to be unnecessary training; in the second, a person spends his entire life feeling out of place and experiences constant discomfort in the professional sphere.

Another risk is the occurrence of deviations. As a result of constant stress, some older teenagers, following the example of older relatives or peers, may begin to “relieve stress” through smoking, drinking alcohol and psychoactive substances.

If you have problems with self-esteem and establishing contacts, there is a risk of difficulties in adapting to new conditions: the team, teachers, forms of certification and knowledge testing.

Herd effect

A manifestation of a mental crisis at 17 years old is copying the lifestyle and habits of peers. This phenomenon can take on a negative connotation if friends are prone to experiments in the field of smoking, drinking alcohol, and psychoactive substances. It is important for parents to take care of the right environment, since the teenager’s behavior largely depends on it.

Direct prohibitions can have the opposite effect, so parental wisdom and tact should be shown. It is necessary to instill from childhood the importance of one’s own opinion and the value of the individual qualities of one’s personality.

My advice to parents

The main thing that parents can do to help in a crisis of adolescence is to give the child more independence and responsibility. During this period, a person expects understanding, support, trust and, most importantly, respect from his parents. He benefits from his parents listening to his opinion, discussing key family issues with him, and making friendly statements about the correctness of his chosen path.

It will not be possible to become a child’s friend during this period: he will find friends among his peers. The role of a parent is mentoring, but without intrusiveness, excessive demands and reproaches. The young man expects his parents to insure him in case of failure, but not to interfere in his affairs without asking. Senior high school students and freshmen are treated with respect if they feel the same about themselves. Otherwise, during the crisis of 17 years, you can completely ruin your relationship with your grown-up child.

Choice of profession

The age of seventeen is a transitional stage before adulthood and professional self-determination is an urgent need; young people begin to think seriously about their future. Parents should remember that this important step requires inner sensitivity. A child cannot be forced to choose a prestigious profession, guided only by mercantile considerations. Full disclosure of abilities and talents will bring both moral satisfaction and the ability to ensure a financial position.

Moms and dads don’t need to strive for their child to follow their professional path. Each person has his own purpose, and the child needs to be helped to realize it to the fullest.

Social development at 17 years old

Most 17 year olds form lasting relationships. They develop close friendships and are less likely to switch between clicks. They also understand the importance of being reliable. When they make a promise to their friends, they want to fulfill their obligations.

Your teen may spend most of their free time with friends, and when they are home, they may prefer to be alone in their room. 1 Parent-teen relationships may also change slightly at this age. For some, this may mean moving away from their parents as they gain independence, but for others, it may mean moving closer to their parents as their desire to rebel wanes.

Major milestones

  • Finding intimacy
  • Want adult leadership roles
  • Able to take on responsibilities

Advice for parents

Set clear dating rules and talk often about healthy relationships, safe sex, consent, and dating.

Cognitive development at 17 years old

By the age of 17, most teenagers have good organizational skills. As a result, they can successfully juggle extracurricular activities, part-time work, and studies. But even though many 17-year-olds think they are adults, their brains are not yet fully developed. Thus, although they may have skills in regulating their impulses, they may still behave recklessly at times.

Most 17-year-olds also think about the future. They begin to make more concrete plans for college and life after high school. 1 V

Fluid intelligence is also achieved at this age, which means that 17-year-olds have an improved ability to cope with new problems and situations. 2

Speech and language

Most 17 year olds can communicate like adults. However, they may not ask for clarification or speak if they do not understand a word or the meaning of a phrase.

Slang is also common among teenagers and can have more meaning than formal language at this age. Meanwhile, some 17-year-olds still have trouble understanding double negatives. And although their attention span has increased, they often lose sight of long and complex questions.

Play

Play for a 17-year-old might include going to a restaurant with a friend or participating in a hobby. Many 17-year-olds engage in the same leisure activities as adults. And most of them have developed hobbies and interests that allow them to relax.

Major milestones

  • Can communicate like an adult
  • Use slang words often
  • Coping with new problems and different situations better than in the past

Advice for parents

Encourage your 17-year-old to read for fun. Reading helps develop a teenager's vocabulary and also improves his or her writing skills.

Experts' opinions

Do you remember what problems your child had during the crisis period of 3 years? What did you do then? Almost all the advice and recommendations that you followed then are applicable to adolescence. What should parents do during the difficult crisis stage of a teenager’s growing up?

  • Be attentive and sensitive to your child’s needs: accept his new friends, giving tactful advice, assist in self-realization and self-affirmation, share new interests, be sensitive to romantic feelings and experiences;
  • Forget that there is a child in front of you and completely reconsider your attitude towards him and the way you communicate. Understand that this is an adult, serious person and treat his opinion accordingly, be able to listen, give practical, unobtrusive advice, trust him and behave in such a way as to win his trust.
  • Solve problems by finding a compromise;
  • Ensure equal requirements for compliance with the rules by all family members;
  • Treat the teenager as an equal person, taking into account his opinion when making family decisions;
  • Show by personal example how you can overcome emotions and feelings;
  • Show genuine interest in new hobbies;
  • Encourage and praise for successful endeavors and the desire to achieve new heights;
  • Do not compare with others, but provide moral and psychological support in every possible way;
  • Do not give critical assessments to negative words or statements.

Parents are faced with the difficult task of making sure that the crisis in the child’s life passes safely, so that, bypassing temporary difficulties in communication, they become a true friend to their child. To do this, give the teenager more freedom and the opportunity to make independent choices. Modern young people are more literate, smarter, and much stronger. They are mobile, sociable and goal-oriented. They need alternatives. They themselves are able to find the right solution; they just need to subtly point out short ways out of the problem situation.

Parents who know the peculiarities of the period of adolescence growing up are able to help their child successfully overcome the difficult age period of personality development. Subject to the attentive and responsible attitude of parents, a teenager will enter adulthood with a set of excellent qualities and character traits that will allow him to correctly shape his future, express himself to the maximum in educational and professional activities, harmoniously build his personal life, become a full member of society, a self-sufficient happy person.

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When to worry

If the thought of sending your 17-year-old out into the real world within the next year scares you, you're not alone. Many parents cannot imagine their teenager navigating the adult world on their own. But often between 17 and 18 years of age there is significant growth. And during this year, teenagers are ready to go to college, the military or work.

If your teen seems particularly ill-prepared for the realities of adulthood, you may want to talk to your child's doctor. You should also be concerned if you notice major changes in your teen's mood or behavior. Decreased grades, changes in sleep patterns, changes in weight or appetite are just a few symptoms that may indicate a mental health problem or another underlying problem. 3

Word from mentalar

As your 17-year-old approaches milestones like graduating from high school and his first year of college, you may begin to wonder if you've done everything you can to prepare him for life outside the home. But it's important to remind yourself that it's not too late for teens to learn new skills like managing money, staying safe, and even cooking their own food.

Proactively look for areas in your teen's life where they may need to sharpen their life skills. As their parent, you play an important role in guiding and teaching them to become the best version of themselves that they can be. And if you hit a few roadblocks along the way, don't be afraid to seek help from a pediatrician or psychiatrist.

The age when a boy or girl reaches 17 years of age is considered transitional before the onset of adulthood. Birthday wishes should be a milestone at the beginning of a new relationship. Parents need to realize that their child is changing and the principles of relationships must change. A 17-year-old teenager who is about to become independent must have both rights and responsibilities to his family. A trusting and warm relationship with a son or daughter at this age will remain so for life.

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