What should a woman be like to make people lose their minds?

For women, negative things happen due to internal dissatisfaction with themselves. We want to be more beautiful, smarter, richer, more successful with men, but it doesn’t work out. We admire Hollywood actresses, world-famous models, friends, but for some reason not ourselves.

Admiring yourself, becoming your own idol is possible! Of course, this requires effort and a certain path. But the game is worth the candle. Checked!

Below are tips for self-improvement. I called the set of these steps “The Path to Yourself.”

Write down what kind of woman you would like to become

Start with your appearance, how much you want to weigh, what kind of hair, teeth, posture. What are you wearing, what kind of makeup are you wearing.

For me, the standard of impeccable style is the current first lady of the United States, Melania Trump. I highly recommend looking at her images.

Then write down people’s attitude towards you: they admire you, want to be like you, love to be around you, are proud of you, admire you.

Then write down all your feelings as if you are already that same woman: how you feel, how life has changed, who is nearby, what your job and salary are, where you go, what you dream about.

I wrote down my text in a beautiful notebook and try to keep it handy. It helps a lot when strength and inspiration leave me.

“I am beautiful: I have a slender figure, a flat, toned stomach, slender legs, large elastic breasts, thin arms, an even oval face, a straight back. I am stylishly dressed, I have the opportunity to buy clothes from the world's leading brands, my hair is beautifully styled, I always smile (with beautiful white, straight teeth). People admire me: the fact that I always manage to do everything, and am always in a great mood. I am the perfect combination of brains and beauty. I am happy because I live in absolute harmony with myself. I enjoy and am proud of the woman I see in the mirror, because it reflects my ideal.”

“A real woman should be soft, compliant, be behind her husband’s back and receive everything through him!” - supporters of “true femininity” are confident. "Rave! A modern woman should be independent, firm, self-confident and self-sufficient!” - feminists insist. And there’s nothing to argue about here at all...

A real woman is not a block of stone or a kneading bowl. She is a river, calmly and confidently carrying its waters in the direction it desires, gently bending around all obstacles.

What qualities should such a woman have? Often the exact opposite. And manifest them depending on the situation. A true woman, and especially a married woman (or dreaming of getting married), should be able to be different.

So, let's discuss the qualities that a woman really needs to be happy in her family. However, they are no less important for an unmarried woman...

• Femininity
• Patience
• Optimism
• Cheerfulness
• Energy
• Self confidence
• Sense of humor
• Compliance
• Perseverance
• Hardness/Durability
• Cunning (female!)
• Sociability
• Flexibility of mind
• The ability to forgive
• Responsibility
• Will
• Worldly wisdom
• Education
• Softness
• Kindness
• Sexuality
• Loyalty
• Education and intelligence
• Thrift
• Practicality
  Consultation with a psychologist.

  Femininity

No matter what anyone says, this is female quality No. 1. No real man wants to see his clone next to him - a masculine “alpha male” in a skirt with a clearly unfeminine style of behavior and manner of communication. A woman constantly trying to dominate, rigidly insisting on her own. Demonstrating that she is the boss of the house. And that, in principle, she doesn’t need anyone at all! Just in case. She's very cool...

Few of us were taught to be feminine. This is true. But it’s never too late to learn to be softer, gentler, more affectionate. So that the man next to us feels in his place...

1. Patience

Intolerance, especially in marriage, often leads to serious consequences: divorce of loving people (when the marriage could have been saved), serious complexes in children (which can come back to haunt them in adulthood), rash and even irreparable actions. And patience gives us many bonuses, the main one of which is women's happiness.

1. Optimism

Dejection has never brought anyone any benefit, much less a married woman. A family is a living organism, and something is constantly happening in it. In my opinion, the larger the family, the greater the happiness. But there are also more problems. And they need to be solved. And a positive outlook on life is simply necessary here. If you sit and whine: “How bad everything is with us!”, it will get even worse. And if the mother of the family looks at life with optimism, then it will be found in the rest of the household.

1. Cheerfulness

This quality is a continuation of the previous one. A woman should radiate light, warmth, joy. And warm the surrounding area. Try to smile more often. Even if cats scratch their souls... This is just as important for unmarried girls. No man needs a gloomy, dull, dissatisfied companion next to him.

1. Energy

A lethargic, lazy, uninitiative woman is a problem for the family.

The role of a wife and mother clearly presupposes activity - solving everyday problems, doing, helping, walking, traveling, finding out, communicating, being able to listen...

Happiness in the home often depends on the energy of a woman (directed in the right direction!) in the family.

1. Self confidence

Here in front of us is a very unconfident girl. And it is extremely difficult for her in life - to find a truly worthy companion, to achieve her goals in various areas. Even just talking to people. And if she gets married, then she takes her complexes into the family. And in a family without calm confidence in oneself and one’s strengths, it is especially difficult. In all aspects - in relationships (with a spouse, with children, with new relatives, etc.), in everyday life, in solving any tasks and problems that family life helpfully offers us with enviable regularity.

1. Sense of humor

In my opinion, it is simply a necessary quality to defuse the situation, reduce nervous tension, reduce the significance of the problem and simply improve the mood of yourself and your loved ones. This means improving the overall climate in the family. Tell me, not everyone has it by nature?

Yes, not every one of us is really witty. It's okay. Even a stupid joke is much better than shouting, panic and mutual accusations.

1. Compliance

An unyielding woman creates unnecessary problems for herself. We see that the husband is not in the mood, a scandal is brewing and now is clearly not the time to argue with him - and still we resist? For what? What will we achieve with this? You can simply pretend that you have come to terms with the decision of your stubborn spouse, and then, under better conditions, try again to get your way. It won't work - again. Come up with new arguments, new ways... Compliance does not mean giving up your goals and desires. This is just wise feminine behavior.

1. Perseverance

And at the same time, in certain situations we must be persistent. If the matter requires a prompt solution, if it is of utmost importance, if it is we who are responsible. At the same time, healthy persistence does not imply hysterics, ridiculing other people’s points of view, harsh pressure, and especially insults.

1. Hardness/Durability

“I’m a girl and I don’t want to decide anything... I’m a gentle and weak creature. Let my husband decide everything, and I’ll hide behind his broad back!” – very sweet feminine behavior that is pleasing to men. And it definitely needs to be practiced. But in life there are always situations when a woman needs to abruptly leave this mode: if she needs to fight back, protect herself and her loved ones, her interests. If collectors call you about someone else’s debt, you won’t chat nicely with them: “Oh, I’m a girl, I don’t decide anything, as you say...” Or when it is necessary to defend the interests of children. Or your husband needs your help. You say: “Well, it’s obvious! In such cases, any woman will change her behavior style!” But life shows that it is not... For some reason, some people stubbornly continue to pretend to be a little girl in such cases.

1. Cunning (female!)

Many will disagree with me here. Why be cunning? You must always be truthful and objective in everything. I don't encourage you to lie blatantly. In no case. But often a slight exaggeration or, conversely, understatement of the description of an event will reliably preserve nerve cells for you and your household. And excessive straightforwardness is generally an enemy in any relationship.

1. Sociability

“What if a woman is naturally silent?” This also happens. And there’s nothing wrong with that. But existing in society, it is the sociable person who always achieves much more for himself and his family. Exchange of information with the outside world is very important. And the ability to communicate correctly in the family helps to cope with any difficulties. We are by no means talking about talkativeness here, which has exactly the opposite property - it only adds problems.

1. Flexibility of mind

It is the ability to reconsider one's decisions and life patterns when conditions change. And even better - the absence of any rigid patterns (we're not talking about moral principles!). With a flexible mind, a woman will be able to confidently maneuver in the sea of ​​life, unobtrusively guiding the family ship in the right direction and helping its crew members cope with any challenges.

1. The ability to forgive

Pride and resentment are serious obstacles to a woman’s happiness. We have offended other people more than once in our lives. Of course, they also insulted us. Someone knows how to carry grievances within themselves for years... Is such a person happy? I highly doubt it. The ability to forgive and forget grievances is a wonderful quality that allows you to preserve human relationships.

1. Responsibility

Few people like to carry it. And sometimes you really want someone else to take responsibility for your family happiness. “I am a weak woman, let them take care of me, take care of me, let my husband decide everything...” - such a sweet motto of female infantilism. And sometimes it’s very useful to “turn it on.” But constantly existing in a mode of irresponsibility is not only unwise, but sometimes downright dangerous. Especially for an adult.

1. Will

Another traditionally masculine quality that a woman simply needs.

A weak-willed woman is a toy in the hands of fate, circumstances, men...

It is through volitional effort that we force ourselves to make and implement the necessary decisions, to insist on our own, and to achieve success in various areas of life. Including in the family.

1. Worldly wisdom

It is believed that it only comes with experience. Yes, of course, over the years a person develops it. But this experience is not always positive. And sometimes, even with age, we continue to go through the same situations incorrectly. At the same time, sometimes very young women intuitively act in worldly wisdom. And we need to learn from them. That is, what is important? As I understand it, constantly learn (both from your own and other people’s experience), draw the right conclusions and adjust your life attitudes.

1. Education

Not everyone believes that a woman needs to know a lot. That receiving additional education in areas of interest to her, engaging in self-education, expanding her horizons is not for a woman... I do not agree. In my opinion, the more knowledge the mother of the family has, the more interesting she is as a person to everyone - her husband, her children, and those around her. At the same time, education is not exactly measured by the number of certificates of completion of universities, courses, trainings, master classes. Only real knowledge and skills are important.

1. Softness

After will and tenacity, it probably seems like a contradiction to be on this list. But I warned you... I believe that a woman should not only be gentle in her relationships with loved ones, but also have gentle manners in her behavior. Watch how her voice sounds. Behind his timbre. Softness and tenderness give a woman a fabulous charm.

1. Kindness

“I’ll be kind, and everyone will sit on my neck...” No. They will sit you down if you are weak-willed. If you are unrequited. If you let someone sit down yourself. And showing kindness and warmth to loved ones and others is real feminine magic. Who else has this ability to do good in the family to such a strong extent? Reassure your husband, console your baby, caress your middle son, listen with understanding to your teenage daughter? Only a woman. There is no weapon against tenderness! As well as against kindness. And especially for pragmatists: most often it is this quality that helps a woman achieve success in any business. And not harsh pressure and demandingness.

1. Sexuality

A woman should look attractive to her own husband. And it doesn’t matter how old she is or how many decades she’s been married to him. Sexual attractiveness, of course, is not only manifested in how it looks. Her demeanor, her style of communication with him - everything should work to ensure that a woman remains desirable to her man. The intimate side of family life receives special attention. Again, no matter how many years you have been together.

1. Loyalty

This is not just about physical betrayal. Here, no woman’s violent temperament or the husband’s decline in interest in this side of married life serves as an excuse for her. Loyalty in thoughts is also very important. For several reasons. First, thoughts often turn into actions. Secondly, your husband may not even understand why you cause him dissatisfaction and irritation. And it’s simple - in your thoughts you are with another man, and your husband feels it. And thirdly, such a female state is very far from harmonious - it prevents the woman herself from enjoying her marriage.

1. Education and intelligence

In the early stages of a relationship, we try to look our best in the eyes of our loved one. Well, then, as usual, we relax. Both in terms of appearance and in their manners. Sometimes we completely forget that we are intelligent people. We do not show enough respect to our spouse. Sometimes we don’t choose expressions. In response, we get a mirror reaction. There is nothing good about this. Therefore, do not forget to take care of yourself in this regard too.

1. Thrift

“I’m not a cook or a cleaner!” - the young wife proudly declares, “Now is not the time when a woman should stand at the stove for hours or scrub the floor!” Maybe she doesn't know how. Maybe he's lazy. And perhaps she really is sure that her husband only needs an interesting person nearby. And he will prepare and clean everything himself. But life will quickly show who is mistaken and where.

1. Practicality

Impracticality is the most dangerous enemy of a family budget, even the most unlimited one.

A woman who is not serious about spending, who does not think through her actions in terms of expenses, is capable of ruining any husband. This does not mean that the whole family should go on starvation rations and darn socks for the fifth time, and put everything else aside for a rainy day. No. We just try to take a practical and reasonable approach to solving all family problems. This will be quite enough.

Of course, there are not twenty-five wonderful female qualities! There are much more of them. Here I have described only the most important ones for family life. In my (and not only!) opinion, possessing precisely these character traits will help a married (or dreaming of getting married) woman find her happiness. Isn't that why we got married?

© Natalia Lutsenko, consultant psychologist

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Set Clear Goals

Identify at least three areas in which you would like to develop.

For example:

• Professional - I want to become an actress.
• Appearance - I want to lose 10 kg by August 2021.
• Intellectual - I want to learn French.

Break each goal into small steps. Do something from this list every day. To avoid forgetting anything, get a habit tracker.

For example:

• I'm driving in the car and doing speech technique exercises.
• I do abs 30 times in the morning.
• I learn ten new French words every day.

Write down different options, suddenly a couple of free minutes will suddenly appear, and you can spend them usefully.

Role models

How did successful women become successful? If previously girls could compete for the title of the most beautiful, today they are increasingly compiling lists of successful young ladies. It is the heroines of such lists that can become role models and tell the secrets of successful women. Among them are:

• Hillary Clinton. Straightforward and purposeful, this female politician is considered one of the most influential in the world. She can serve as an example of how even a public scandal does not stop you on the path to success. Hard work and work on one's image made the public forget the story associated with ex-husband and former US President Bill Clinton. Even losing the recent presidential election does not stop Clinton from continuing to work on her career in politics.
• Joanne Rowling. A true example that success can be achieved at any age and in any position. This writer is known throughout the world as a housewife who became a millionaire. She was rejected by twelve different publishing houses, but did not stop. Thanks to this woman, the world acquired the most popular fairy tale of our time - the inspiring story about the wizard Harry Potter. Millions of fans around the world might never have known her if Rowling had broken down after her fifth or tenth rejection. Joan’s personal life is also great, which once again proves that success can be achieved in any area.
• Jennifer Aniston. A true example of a successful woman in the world of cinema. The world-famous actress and Hollywood diva did not immediately become famous. In her youth, she worked as a courier, a waitress, and did not give up her dream of acting in films. Today Jennifer is known and loved by the whole world, and at the end of last year she entered the top of the highest paid actresses.

Invest in yourself!

A big goal requires a big investment: mental, physical, emotional. Read more books. I love books on motivation, psychology and biographies of interesting people.

My list of books that I have read and am very pleased with:

1. Larisa Renard "Circle of Female Power".
2. Larisa Renard "Discovering a new self."
3. Jen Sincero "NISES".
4. How I Became the Famous Skinny Rich Happy Me by Eric Weiner.
5. Mila Tumanova “A woman begins with her body.”
6. Mikhail Labkovsky “I want and I will.”
7. Vadim Zeland “Reality Transurfing” (all parts).
8. John Gray "Men are from Mars, women are from Venus."
9. Petr Ploskov “The Power of Instagram.”

List of books I want to read in the near future:

1. Larisa Renard "Four Facets of Perfection."
2. Larisa Renard "Make your husband a millionaire."
3. Andrey Kurpatov “Happy of my own free will.”
4. Lev Vozhevatov “A man’s view of relationships.”
5. Bertrand Russell "The Pursuit of Happiness"

How to learn to be feminine with a man

Show him that you are weak and fragile

If you want to be feminine for your man, then you should not demonstrate your leadership qualities to him, and show him once again that you are able to understand many issues better than him. This will put you on the path of competition with your lover, but your goal is different - to show him that you need protection and support.

Let him do all the man's work

Even if you are capable of nailing a nail yourself, fixing a TV, or chopping wood for a fire, you shouldn’t demonstrate it. Let the man prove himself. Let him feel needed and irreplaceable next to you. Some women initially take on too many responsibilities, and as a result, their partners get used to this state of affairs and completely relax. It is important for a man to be in good shape, and helping his chosen one contributes to this in the best possible way.

Give thanks and praise

Whatever a man does for you, thank him for his help. Even if it is some small thing, and in fact you believe that it does not deserve special attention at all, your beloved will be pleased if you note his merits. Such behavior will become an additional motivation and incentive for him to achieve new achievements. If he remembers that any of his help and participation resonates with you and gives him positive emotions, he will strive for this again.

Be gentle, smile

It is quite difficult for a gloomy girl to look feminine, even if she is dressed without any complaints. People generally associate femininity with kindness, inner light, and tenderness. It is important to develop all these qualities in yourself. Be friendly, polite and friendly with people - this will undoubtedly have a positive effect on your image.

Don't raise your voice or swear

A feminine person does not swear or become hysterical. If she doesn’t like something, she becomes sad or even tries to get out of the conflict situation. Even if you find yourself in an unpleasant situation, and your interlocutor or interlocutors behave indecently, do not stoop to this level - try to “save face” and not proceed to unnecessary squabbles.

Be a woman with a mystery

It is important to be able to maintain this line between openness and mystery. Be sincere with people, but leave a slight trail of mystery - there should not be too much of it, but a little intrigue will never harm a real woman.

Believe in yourself!

Even when everyone laughs, even when it doesn’t work out, even when the whole world is against it!

Remember, people are jealous that you can make a statement and they can’t. I love Lady Gaga's quote:

“Of course, people don’t like it when you’re not like them. They will ridicule you for a long time, condemn you, humiliate you, but all this comes from envy. They can’t do it like you, they don’t have the courage. It’s easier to call someone crazy than to admit that you’re afraid to stand out from the crowd.”

The results of my thoughts

In my article, I shared with you my thoughts about what a modern woman should be and how to raise her, and made a presentation for you. All these thoughts and ideas were received by me based on work experience and psychological education; I in no way claim that this is a mandatory pattern of behavior. My dears, despite any life circumstances and outside influences, do not lose your uniqueness, because the main rule of a modern woman is to be individual, unique.

If you have any significant shortcomings, try to get rid of them, be constantly on the move, look for changes in life. Thus, you will definitely find yourself and your place in this huge world. I will be very glad if my articles help you become better and inspire you to achieve achievements, because that is exactly what I write for. Read my creations, comment, share with your friends and acquaintances on social networks, let more people know about our secrets, and add their own that we missed.

And today I’m waiting for your comments, whether you agree with my opinion or want to challenge it, if you don’t agree, express your opinion, don’t be afraid of criticism and opposition, share your knowledge for the benefit of us all. Happiness and goodness to everyone!

Act, praise yourself for your actions and reward!

In such small steps. You will see, you will be very proud of yourself, you will realize that you are moving in the right direction.

“Journal of Victories” will help you! Write down every little thing there and reward yourself: for a small step with a small gift, for a big one with a big one.

Pamper yourself, arrange Beauty Days for yourself. Even in Moscow it is not very expensive. For example, I am an active user of the Dry and Go Bar format: you can do your hair for 990 rubles in just half an hour.

Going to the spa at least once a month should become a good tradition. Do you think it's expensive? Myth! Google Biglion coupons.

End the day with meditation

An application with cool meditations and tips is available on iTunes and is called “Circle of Feminine Power”, where, by the way, you can also find Larisa’s books in electronic format (see point 3).

Relax and calm yourself at the end of the day. After all, a chic woman is, first of all, about her inner state.

With love, self-motivation expert Anastasia Rudenok

The Academy blog is open to expert authors. If you want to write an article, please read the editorial policy. We welcome your materials!

Erudition6

Erudition is an excellent indicator of the modernity of female nature. Again, the Internet is an ideal assistant in this. He does not exist to endlessly slap recipes and slobbering statuses on his page or watch endless TV series. This is the lot of absolutely out-of-date clubs. The World Wide Web allows you to gain new knowledge and skills without leaving your home. A woman learns to construct her speech correctly and competently. The more knowledge a lady has in her head, the more modern she is.